am I pregnant????

Unbeliveable. The best way to deal with rude people is to ask them the same question right back. It works surprisingly well in a lot of different situations. Or the old, "Funny, I was just about to ask you . . . "

I have said some pretty outrageous things to impudent strangers. I kind of figure so long as you attack the behaviour, and not the person, you've pretty much got carte blanche after an opening salvo like that. Unfortunately, there will always be these sorts of people in the world -- so make 'em squirm, I say!!!

And, yes, let it bounce off you. Most people don't mean to be mean; they are simply awkward or projecting their issues onto you. Or, she might have felt bad that she was making you stand so long and that's why she asked if you were pregnant. Still pretty dumb, but there is probably some justification for her behaviour that has to do with her own hang-ups rather than you. Whenever someone does something nasty to me, I always feel horrible afterwards, because I feel like I must have provoked it. "It must really be me." I've slowly come to realize that I can't control other people's behaviour, and that most times rude behaviour says something about the person being rude -- and nothing negative about me.

P.S. When my brother was in the hospital we had to put up with some really horrible remarks. People asked if he was retarded!!! (Um, no, he's had a *spinal injury*) They couldn't understand why he was so "unpleasant." Duh!?! Who the heck is pleasant when they're having holes drilled into their skull? Some people really do lack empathy.

Been there!!!!! Just last week as a matter of fact. When I replied no, she asked me why I was getting so fat.... I feel your pain!!!! :flowerforyou: Oh well, we're better than that, and at least we are working at improving ourselves. Have a great day.
Dawn

Shudder. This is what scares me about the whole ordeal of being pregnant - the pre-gnant and the post-gnant commentary/ touching / assuming one's body is public property due to its being used/ having recently been used to usher in another member of the human race.

I have never heard of anybody asking an overweight guy, "HEY MAN, ARE YOU FAT?"

Grumble. There's more but I'll end there.

:huh:

I've never understood how people can be so clueless. I thought everyone knew by now not to ask a woman that question.

a. It's nobody's business.
b. It's emotionally loaded on many levels.
c. There is great potential for spectacular embarrassment to both the asker and askee.

For men, there isn't a corollary question. Many people do comment on a man's weight though. I can't tell you how many times a stranger has said, "Wow, you're a big-un!", "You haven't missed many meals!", "You look like you know how to eat!", "You're a big-old boy!, "You look like you're full-grown", etc. Heck, my wife and I were shopping for a mattress and the salesperson said, "well, bigger people such as yourselves..." We still joke about it.

More often, male friends engage in good-natured ribbing. I commented to a friend recently that he was, "bulking up nicely". Men are more used to such comments and questions and tend to have a thicker skin about it, partly because there is less social pressure and stigma associated with being overweight for men. In private, all the men I know are unbelievably vain and self-conscious so the "thick-skin" thing is just an illusion.