When do I stop being afraid?

I'm only 20, so it's hard for me to speak maybe, but my take on it has always been the same. Don't turn down the dates and stop trying to look for mister right! Enjoy the dates you have, make sure that life is fun. If you can have fun even without having a steady relationship yet who've already won something, namely happiness!

I've only ever had one boyfriend, but for the past 6 years he lived in America and i lived in the Netherlands. Because of it i never went on dates at all. Now that he lives here with me, and i'm doing all those things, i realised what i missed out on in the years before that. I love him to death and wouldn't have wanted it any other way.. but even without a steady relationship.. some good nights out might do you good.

Don't see it as going through the getting to know phase.. just have fun, if it clicks, you'll know..

I know exactly how you feel. I get to the point where I just want to give up. However I did meet a man on craigslist (totally accidental and not looking for a date at the time). I had just gotten out of a horrible 5 year relationship with a man I thought I would end up spending the rest of my life with - UH NOT! He sure showed his true colors by having a mid life crisis going after a 27 year old and after I lost my job and was losing my house to foreclosure. I vowed I would never fall for another man again or let anybody get close to me. So the guy I am seeing now (for the past 15 months) is very sweet and respectful and not like any other guy I have ever dated. I really like him but with being burned so many times and he was too (his ex wife and ex live in gf cheated on him), I'm a little hesitant to get too close and he has been even more so standoffish. I'm amost thinking I want to bail on this relationship now and just give up. What gives in finding someone to love who loves me back. Why is it so hard anymore? I'm a really easy going fun spirited person (at least that's what all my friends say about me and even those I don't know that well). What gives? It sounds like you might be as frustrated as me - UGH!

You are not alone. Dating from the internet is not abnormal any more...something like 1 in 5 people do it and I'm sure it will continue to grow. Key: Just be really careful; don't let anyone know where you live; have a specific cell phone (unlisted number...); always meet at a public place; after a few dates and you want to get closer, take the financial hit and have him investigated. As I think about it, you should do this NOW for any one, no matter where you meet them.

Hey, you may never meet Mr. Right, just Mr. Right Now...that's ok. They way life is I say just stay involved in things you like to do and get to know people. Either way you should fill up your life with things other than or inclusive of your/a man.

i say get yourself out there & meet some new people ,it doesnt have to end in a relationship or anything heavy ,so try & think about it in a new light that its not a date !!! or what you would hope & want from a date !!!! your just meeting a likewise person that you can have a relaxing chat .
if a likewise person on mfp turned out to live just round the corner from you & you arranged to meet up ,you would be interested to meet them & chat about stuff . you wouldnt be bailing out through nerves ,go for it & have a fun & interesting time & dont forget your a new person to them too & maybe the same feelings going through their minds ,a good conversation & breaking the ice starter to admit how nervous you were before hand & to have a giggle about it .
you can never meet too many people & new faces bring new life stories
brace yourself ,deep breath & go have some light hearted fun & there is nothing wrong with dating sites , avoid complication with friends we allready know & start a fresh with no previous friendship strings attached.
good luck my lovely xx

You can't let your past blind your future. Only you can control your happiness and the way your life goes. That special person is out there for you and when its right you will know

1) It can be really hard to build a social network in Austin UNTIL you find a hobby. Check out Hill Country Outdoors, Austin Swing Syndicate, Four on the Floor, Hoop Circle (or any of the circus related groups) or any active group on Meet up to find an active hobby that will help you with two goals at a time. Remember, even if you don't do any of those activities now, all of these groups are designed to get people involved.

2) Online dating pretty much sucks in Austin. Everyone has a profile, no one has a second date. Maybe its just me (and most of my friends), but the only thing I ever got out of online dating in Austin was the entertainment factor of sharing all the new ways to be creepy. It came to be necessary to share those stories because, like yourself, I would start to think that I was misjudging or overjudging everything, but people tended to agree that the weird is alive and well in Austin, at least online.

3) The common factor is you - is it possible that you feel uncomfortable with yourself right now and are blaming that on the weight? Having experienced online dating in Austin, I will forgo my normal advice which would have been to go, get yourself a nice outfit and go on the next date that comes available. Of course, as long as you meet in public, you could do that and have a good story to tell, even if it isn't such a great date In the meantime, focus on YOU and refer to point #1 - any of those activities will make you feel good about yourself if you stick with them AND you will meet tons of people.