How to Forgive Yourself?

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Ferrous_Female_Dog
Ferrous_Female_Dog Posts: 221 Member
in Motivation and Support
I'm back at square one- almost. Spent about 2 months out of the gym, 1 month not tracking food, and have gained back 18 of the 20 pounds I lost. It's extremely frustrating.

I know what I need to do to lose it again, but I am struggling to forgive myself for falling off track so badly. Every time I want to go to the gym, I get frustrated at the prospect of having to face the fact that my stamina is lower and that I can't lift as much as I used to. I used to squat 150lbs, which was a lot for me, and I have no idea what it will be now. I know no one is going to notice or care, but I will feel embarrassed going from 45lb plates to 25s. I'll probably have to start with just the bar for bench and OHP.

So I am beating myself up over it, and not wanting to face it. My energy levels have crashed so it's more difficult to get up at 5am for the gym. Feeling tired makes me grumpy. Feeling grumpy makes me beat myself up for falling off track. Beating myself up makes me feel like I'm not worth the effort so I go back to bed.

How can I forgive myself for this and move past punishing myself? I am holding myself back because I am angry with myself and I don't know how to move past that anger.

Replies

  • ThePhoenixIsRising
    ThePhoenixIsRising Posts: 781 Member
    edited October 2014
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    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1458237/if-a-child-fails

    This was a post of mine when I was working through the same feelings.
  • Lizzy622
    Lizzy622 Posts: 3,705 Member
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    GET OUT OF BED!!!! I messed up too and am walking much slower than before. I was starting to walk/run and an having trouble just walking now. I am just getting back day by day and not looking to the past. It is done and I MUST move forward.
  • fat2skinny50
    fat2skinny50 Posts: 104 Member
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    The past is the past, you fell off the wagon and gained weight, big deal... Put all that behind you and say today is a new day, today is the first day of me getting into shape. Pick yourself up, and work-out in any way. Doesn't have to be at a gym, buy hand weights and start at home, walk before/after work. Just get up and MOVE and most of all move forward. Good luck to you, you did it before, you WILL do it again
  • brightsideofpink
    brightsideofpink Posts: 1,018 Member
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    Ask yourself where you want to be 2 months from now? Still beating yourself up and regretting two more months off? Or feeling accomplished. Acknowledge that the next two months are makeups, but they are the only thing getting you closer to where you need to be. You can totally do it!
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
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    Do what I do. Don't think about it too much...just do it! If I think about things too much it gets overwhelming.
  • cstevenson86
    cstevenson86 Posts: 158 Member
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    This sounds familiar. I swear at least three times a year for the past 8 years I've been on the wagon and then fallen off. It's hard to stay committed. Let's face it, it's way more fun laying around watching movies and relaxing after a hard day then hitting the gym. You're worth getting back on the horse! Do not give up! I am about 4 months into my weight loss journey. I FINALLY lost the first 20 pounds. It was thrilling to get on the scale and see I'm finally losing the weight. Try to remember the feeling of pure joy you must have felt when you lost 20 pounds. Don't give up on yourself!
  • applejax86
    applejax86 Posts: 20 Member
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    Been there done that. Just jump back on that waggon and ride on to your goal :smiley:
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
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    Its done and theres nothing you can do except start over. Beating yourself up is neither healthy or helpful towards the place you want to go. You can either mope about it or get on with it. Maube the things you have to learn is why you fell off the wagon and your new stragey as to how you are going to avoid it in the future.
  • LoraF83
    LoraF83 Posts: 15,694 Member
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    Ferrous_Female_Dog wrote: »
    I'm back at square one- almost. Spent about 2 months out of the gym, 1 month not tracking food, and have gained back 18 of the 20 pounds I lost. It's extremely frustrating.

    I know what I need to do to lose it again, but I am struggling to forgive myself for falling off track so badly. Every time I want to go to the gym, I get frustrated at the prospect of having to face the fact that my stamina is lower and that I can't lift as much as I used to. I used to squat 150lbs, which was a lot for me, and I have no idea what it will be now. I know no one is going to notice or care, but I will feel embarrassed going from 45lb plates to 25s. I'll probably have to start with just the bar for bench and OHP.

    So I am beating myself up over it, and not wanting to face it. My energy levels have crashed so it's more difficult to get up at 5am for the gym. Feeling tired makes me grumpy. Feeling grumpy makes me beat myself up for falling off track. Beating myself up makes me feel like I'm not worth the effort so I go back to bed.

    How can I forgive myself for this and move past punishing myself? I am holding myself back because I am angry with myself and I don't know how to move past that anger.

    You can spend more time wallowing in it and not making any progress and continuing to be miserable.

    Or you can do something about it.


    But you're the only one who can change it. YOU make the choice to be miserable about this issue every day. Only you.
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
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    If you want to forgive yourself, you imply that you have done something wrong. I don't like that approach when someone is innocent. Life happens. Now is a time for making a new set of decisions. Choose some that are good for you. Be good to yourself. Have fun lifting.

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