Do we really need goals?

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Sourceress
Sourceress Posts: 3
in Introduce Yourself
When I search for motivation online and in life people tend to throw the word 'goal' back at me. I don't want to set a goal for myself. While it sets up the possibility of success, it also sets up a much larger possibility of failure. The success is nice but the failure is too much anymore. Even this very welcoming community stresses me out about setting daily goals and weekly goals and so on and so forth. It's too much. Can we not just find success in getting through sugar withdrawal? Or simply figuring out how to eat without being idiots about it?

Does anyone else get stressed out by goals?
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  • thegreatcanook
    thegreatcanook Posts: 2,419 Member
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    I was stressed by BIG goals. Smaller goals seemed more attainable. Then momentum and confidence started to build. Before I knew it, I conquered the 100lb mountain!
    Feel free to add me!
  • besaro
    besaro Posts: 1,858 Member
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    yes and no. having solid goals give me a north star, yet my path to get there might stray and veer, and I may meander, I can continue to right myself if I know what my ultimate goal is. I don't have guilt as I wander.
  • 50sFit
    50sFit Posts: 712 Member
    edited October 2014
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    Sourceress wrote: »
    When I search for motivation online and in life people tend to throw the word 'goal' back at me. I don't want to set a goal for myself. While it sets up the possibility of success, it also sets up a much larger possibility of failure. The success is nice but the failure is too much anymore. Even this very welcoming community stresses me out about setting daily goals and weekly goals and so on and so forth. It's too much. Can we not just find success in getting through sugar withdrawal? Or simply figuring out how to eat without being idiots about it?

    Does anyone else get stressed out by goals?

    Success and achievement can me summed up with one word: goals.
    Most are too lazy and ruled by fear to set goals. Again, that's most people.
    Don't join that herd. Be different.
    • set your goals'
    • make a plan
    • take action
    • stay motivated
    • never quit
    That's how winning is done. Good Luck! <3
  • dakotababy
    dakotababy Posts: 2,406 Member
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    Goals motivate me like nothing else. It is something I set my mind to and officially have direction. I could not imagine walking around aimlessly without going towards something.

    Tell me, what is failure?

    Is it going for your goal and missing...or not going at all?

    This is common in some, a fear of failure. You can look it up, see what its all about. Maybe consider redefining what failure is.
  • InnocentLunatic
    InnocentLunatic Posts: 35 Member
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    Sourceress wrote: »
    Can we not just find success in getting through sugar withdrawal? Or simply figuring out how to eat without being idiots about it?

    I think both of those would count as possible goals ;) Not weight loss goals, but a goal all the same. I think, if being healthier is your goal, then your goal should just be "Make healthier decisions today" with the emphasis of /today/ as I think that when you "fail" one day, it makes it a lot harder to keep going the next day sometimes, but you have to remember that two wrongs don't make a right lol... or if you need something more specific, "Eat more vegetables" "Go for a walk" "Take the stairs" whatever it may be, and while some people might just think of these as steps to a goal-- all of the little steps are still goals of their own.


  • chadya07
    chadya07 Posts: 627 Member
    edited October 2014
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    your whole life is goals.. a goal is not exactly a plan, but it is not unlike a plan either. without a plan, one is less likely to succeed at their endeavor... but they still can. i mean... they can rely on luck or guesswork... but it is much less reliable than a plan and a goal.

    if you want your results to be consistent a plan will do you good.
  • LeslieTSUK
    LeslieTSUK Posts: 215 Member
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    Goals are like anything else, some need them others don't, just like some some see 50% as half full, or half empty.

    If your one of those people that get easily upset, and slightest little thing makes you give up?
    Then don't set goals, just plod along till at such point your happy.

    If your one of those people that need to aim for something,
    then set an end goal.

    Anyone in-between,
    set mini goals, so your constantly feeling good about yourself.

    Simples
  • ereck44
    ereck44 Posts: 1,170 Member
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    A dream is a goal without a plan. It's hard to be successful without a plan. You can call it a plan if the word Goal is too intimidating.
  • missylectro
    missylectro Posts: 448 Member
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    If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there.... You NEED goals so you know what road to take...
  • forkofpower
    forkofpower Posts: 171 Member
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    Everything that you want, and deliberately try to achieve, is a goal. Eating right and beating sugar addiction are both goals.
  • Sourceress
    Sourceress Posts: 3
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    Thanks for all the kind words.

    I guess my frustration is coming from not having lots of goals. My only 'goal' right now is to kick the sugar out. Beyond that becoming a different person (which is the real goal) is so far out and reachable in any manner of ways that making a plan is what seems useless. Because if I do plan it out and set those smaller steps along the way and then I fail, picking a new path seems to make more sense than starting over. The only reason that does not work is because of how long it takes my body to adjust to new nutrition patterns. At the same time, starting anything over from the beginning is logic that makes my brain angry.

    And the creation of this new me will involve so many steps that again, are just arbitrary and up to me and if I fail at something I made myself do, then I look like an idiot only to myself. Which results in a less happy me. And even if I do succeed at these things I made myself do, no one cares. This also results in a less happy me.

    So how do you make yourself care when no one else does?
  • Lounmoun
    Lounmoun Posts: 8,426 Member
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    I focus on one or two small goals. Every little positive change is a step in the right direction.

  • betoarango
    betoarango Posts: 222 Member
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    If you dont know where you want to go... Youll never get there...
    If you cant figure out what you want to do... how do you expect to acomplish it...
    Stop being afraid of failure...maybe that can be your first goal..
    good luck
  • spirit095
    spirit095 Posts: 1,017 Member
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    I can understand why goals can be stressful. This is why I set small, manageable and realistic goals for myself. I find that it helps to keep me focused and on track. I guess you will need to find something that works for you. There is no one-size fits all for this. Good luck op!
  • SugarBabyGirl
    SugarBabyGirl Posts: 7,026 Member
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    Why are you searching for motivation on line? Motivation comes from within. And if you have no goals how will you know when you've accomplished anything?
  • laughsalot785
    laughsalot785 Posts: 7 Member
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    I think this blog post by James Altucher explains encapsulates the need to follow a concrete "system", rather than a "goal". It's a really good read. jamesclear.com/goals-systems. I think the main take-away is to commit to a process, not a goal . . . once you've committed to a process, the goal will take care of itself.
  • justcat206
    justcat206 Posts: 716 Member
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    I've kept my goals rather vague to help counter against life 'getting in the way' - i.e. one of my goals is to "lift heavier" rather than "get my bench up to x lbs by x date." That way I feel proud of my progress when it happens, and I have a plan of action (keep lifting) but I don't feel like I failed if I missed a date. Same with "run faster" and "get more flexible" - they're general directions to work toward, but I'm not putting pressure on myself to make it happen right now. It's a little more specific than "get more healthy" though.
  • haildodger
    haildodger Posts: 181 Member
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    “Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
    ― Winston S. Churchill
  • Lane1012
    Lane1012 Posts: 211 Member
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    If you truly want something you have to be willing to do the work. Setting smaller goals helps make the larger ones more manageable, but if you allow yourself to make excuses for failing you're really just spinning your wheels and you'd have to question whether you really want it or not. Set goals. Work hard to achieve them. Don't beat yourself up if you get off track just get back at it. Just my 2c.
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
    edited October 2014
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    No. Goals are important because they give us a destination which we can aim for.

    Try starting off with mini goals and hit those. To pretend they dont exist is to lack direction. I dont obsess over them, I know when Im kidding myself and I try to keep the balance between being relaistic and meaningful. Golas help incentivise me to make progress.

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