I am confused to hell!

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Replies

  • SWEETMAY84
    SWEETMAY84 Posts: 66 Member
    OOOOkkkk...
    Unfriending people because they don't meet your criteria of health is not my mojo for sure, so let them go sweety and forget about it! Diets and life changes are a journey, not a destination, if takes lows and highs and you have being on this for a "short time" and have lost tones of weight, (28 pounds if significant and you are looking good!) ... So adjust your calories, try to watch your sodium, I eat 1200 net calories a day, run almost daily, and eat back my calories (so I can hit 1200) some days I don't meet my 1200's some times I eat a few more... and I still loose close to 1.5 pounds per week... do what works for you!! <3

  • muggzie399
    muggzie399 Posts: 116 Member
    2013sk wrote: »
    Have you worked out your bmr & tdee again after your weight loss?

    You need to eat more. Eating 1200 calories + exercise is not good.

    Food is fuel!

    Sounds like people deleted you as your probably over exercising, under eating??

    Am I right?????? Or wrong???????????
    My guess, under eating. I would just figurwe my whole day ahead of time so as to come in under calories. Just a walker.

  • PrizePopple
    PrizePopple Posts: 3,133 Member
    I'm not on MFP to @ss pat people who are being unhealthy. It's also not my job, nor my place, to tell you that you're hurting yourself. Not unless you ask specifically for opinions.

    I removed someone for asking what was wrong with looking at "thinspo" pictures.

    I removed a few people for collecting friends.

    I'll remove for being under 1200 too. I had a friend who was about to get cut, but they owned up to not eating enough and have been making a very awesome effort to correct that.

    I might also consider removing someone who continuously goes over calories with no obvious intention of correcting it.

    MFP is a tool for me to utilize to make myself healthier, and having people around me that don't have the same goals in mind is counterproductive. End of story.
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    Liftng4Lis wrote: »
    Personally, If I have a friend at 1200 and they are eating at 1200, I'm good with that-BUT, if I notice they are consistently going under that 1200, I want nothing to do with that. Where it is not my business what someone else does, I can't consciously tell them good job or nice day if they are starving themselves. That makes them no longer a good fit for me and we part ways.

    When you're out at the store and someone tells you "have a nice day", do you first ask them if they're eating at least 1200 cals/day before telling them to "have a nice day", as well? Weird.

    lolwut? Do you even logic?

  • muggzie399
    muggzie399 Posts: 116 Member
    I'm not on MFP to @ss pat people who are being unhealthy. It's also not my job, nor my place, to tell you that you're hurting yourself. Not unless you ask specifically for opinions.

    I removed someone for asking what was wrong with looking at "thinspo" pictures.

    I removed a few people for collecting friends.

    I'll remove for being under 1200 too. I had a friend who was about to get cut, but they owned up to not eating enough and have been making a very awesome effort to correct that.

    I might also consider removing someone who continuously goes over calories with no obvious intention of correcting it.

    MFP is a tool for me to utilize to make myself healthier, and having people around me that don't have the same goals in mind is counterproductive. End of story.

    This was not a friend request. Everybody has a plan. Was looking for change in mine. Advice being welcome.

  • My mum is almost 78 (in 2.5 months) and she was 5'6" but from aging she is about 5'1" now. She doesn't exercise, except doing regular daily activities around the house. She eats everything also but in moderation. She eats more than 1200 calories a day and maintains. I would estimate her intake to be around 1500. On occasion she eats more than that and still maintains. Her diet is a good balance of the various food groups.

    Maybe you are not eating enough? Maybe you are eating too much salty stuff and you are retaining fluid. Maybe you are underestimating what you are eating. Maybe your food choices are mostly one food group or one macro. Maybe you have already arrived at your appropriate weight... have you asked your doctor about it? It's hard to tell most things because we cannot access your diary, and we don't know what you have tried/not tried.

    With regards to your friends, maybe you asked for help repeatedly and they gave suggestions but you didn't listen. I know that can be frustrating for friends trying to offer help (it drives me crazy). Maybe you never opened your diary or interacted with them. I have some like that and what is the point? Maybe you undereat and it is triggering people who have food issues; I have some friends like that and it is starting to mess with my head and what I am doing ... so it's likely I will need to drop them for my own well being. It's hard to say why they dropped you ... Maybe they had too many friends and needed to pick the ones they had the most in common with.

    Regardless, I hope you figure out what you need to achieve your goals in a healthy way. Take care :)
  • jkal1979
    jkal1979 Posts: 1,896 Member
    muggzie399 wrote: »
    I'm not on MFP to @ss pat people who are being unhealthy. It's also not my job, nor my place, to tell you that you're hurting yourself. Not unless you ask specifically for opinions.

    I removed someone for asking what was wrong with looking at "thinspo" pictures.

    I removed a few people for collecting friends.

    I'll remove for being under 1200 too. I had a friend who was about to get cut, but they owned up to not eating enough and have been making a very awesome effort to correct that.

    I might also consider removing someone who continuously goes over calories with no obvious intention of correcting it.

    MFP is a tool for me to utilize to make myself healthier, and having people around me that don't have the same goals in mind is counterproductive. End of story.

    This was not a friend request. Everybody has a plan. Was looking for change in mine. Advice being welcome.

    You mentioned that you were losing friends over this, and that is why it is being addressed. Did you reach out to your friends and explain what was going on and that you need help? It's very possible that they thought that you didn't want help and it was easier to unfriend you than to give unsolicited advice and/or support what they believe is an unhealthy way to lose weight.
  • 1Cor1510
    1Cor1510 Posts: 413 Member
    I am 5'6" too, weigh 161 lbs, and eat generally 1500-1700 calories a day. I lose weight at about 1 lb every 10 days. My TDEE is not very high, about 2100 on average per my fitbit and that's with exercise most weeks. A sedentary day for me is about an average burn of 1800-1850 calories. You could easily go up to 1400 calories and still lose. ALSO, I started out at 1200 cals a day and didn't lose much weight until I upped my to 1500 or so. Everyone's different, but I would def try upping those cals for a couple of weeks and see what happens. Good luck :drinker:
  • muggzie399
    muggzie399 Posts: 116 Member
    jkal1979 wrote: »
    muggzie399 wrote: »
    I'm not on MFP to @ss pat people who are being unhealthy. It's also not my job, nor my place, to tell you that you're hurting yourself. Not unless you ask specifically for opinions.

    I removed someone for asking what was wrong with looking at "thinspo" pictures.

    I removed a few people for collecting friends.

    I'll remove for being under 1200 too. I had a friend who was about to get cut, but they owned up to not eating enough and have been making a very awesome effort to correct that.

    I might also consider removing someone who continuously goes over calories with no obvious intention of correcting it.

    MFP is a tool for me to utilize to make myself healthier, and having people around me that don't have the same goals in mind is counterproductive. End of story.

    This was not a friend request. Everybody has a plan. Was looking for change in mine. Advice being welcome.

    You mentioned that you were losing friends over this, and that is why it is being addressed. Did you reach out to your friends and explain what was going on and that you need help? It's very possible that they thought that you didn't want help and it was easier to unfriend you than to give unsolicited advice and/or support what they believe is an unhealthy way to lose weight.

    Went to quote you and flagged you by mistake. The advice I would receive from these people was directed toward my exercising and buildiung muscle and fat and all the stuff I was not familiar with. They don't consider your time frame being a member. 6 mos. compared to 3 years has a whole different perspective.

  • PrizePopple
    PrizePopple Posts: 3,133 Member
    muggzie399 wrote: »
    jkal1979 wrote: »
    muggzie399 wrote: »
    I'm not on MFP to @ss pat people who are being unhealthy. It's also not my job, nor my place, to tell you that you're hurting yourself. Not unless you ask specifically for opinions.

    I removed someone for asking what was wrong with looking at "thinspo" pictures.

    I removed a few people for collecting friends.

    I'll remove for being under 1200 too. I had a friend who was about to get cut, but they owned up to not eating enough and have been making a very awesome effort to correct that.

    I might also consider removing someone who continuously goes over calories with no obvious intention of correcting it.

    MFP is a tool for me to utilize to make myself healthier, and having people around me that don't have the same goals in mind is counterproductive. End of story.

    This was not a friend request. Everybody has a plan. Was looking for change in mine. Advice being welcome.

    You mentioned that you were losing friends over this, and that is why it is being addressed. Did you reach out to your friends and explain what was going on and that you need help? It's very possible that they thought that you didn't want help and it was easier to unfriend you than to give unsolicited advice and/or support what they believe is an unhealthy way to lose weight.

    Went to quote you and flagged you by mistake. The advice I would receive from these people was directed toward my exercising and buildiung muscle and fat and all the stuff I was not familiar with. They don't consider your time frame being a member. 6 mos. compared to 3 years has a whole different perspective.

    My time back on the wagon is 8 weeks.

    Yeah. 8 weeks.

    Guess what, exercise is part of it. Eating at a deficit is the bulk of it ... But deficit =/= under 1200 calories. I've been eating roughly between 1570-1700 calories a day and I've lost 16 pounds in 8 weeks. I've had some *kitten* days where I'm over, and some where I'm more like 1300. It balances out though, and I exercise. I've begun "running" and will soon start out lifting light weights. My friends are awesome and know their *kitten*, and I love them for that.
  • jkal1979
    jkal1979 Posts: 1,896 Member
    muggzie399 wrote: »
    jkal1979 wrote: »
    muggzie399 wrote: »
    I'm not on MFP to @ss pat people who are being unhealthy. It's also not my job, nor my place, to tell you that you're hurting yourself. Not unless you ask specifically for opinions.

    I removed someone for asking what was wrong with looking at "thinspo" pictures.

    I removed a few people for collecting friends.

    I'll remove for being under 1200 too. I had a friend who was about to get cut, but they owned up to not eating enough and have been making a very awesome effort to correct that.

    I might also consider removing someone who continuously goes over calories with no obvious intention of correcting it.

    MFP is a tool for me to utilize to make myself healthier, and having people around me that don't have the same goals in mind is counterproductive. End of story.

    This was not a friend request. Everybody has a plan. Was looking for change in mine. Advice being welcome.

    You mentioned that you were losing friends over this, and that is why it is being addressed. Did you reach out to your friends and explain what was going on and that you need help? It's very possible that they thought that you didn't want help and it was easier to unfriend you than to give unsolicited advice and/or support what they believe is an unhealthy way to lose weight.

    Went to quote you and flagged you by mistake. The advice I would receive from these people was directed toward my exercising and buildiung muscle and fat and all the stuff I was not familiar with. They don't consider your time frame being a member. 6 mos. compared to 3 years has a whole different perspective.

    Woo hoo my first flag! B)

    Seriously though, just post up "Hey, I'm wanting to make sure that I'm doing this right and I want to make sure that I'm eating enough while still losing. Does anyone have any suggestions?" Focus the question on your eating and you will get the answers that you are looking for.
  • muggzie399
    muggzie399 Posts: 116 Member
    There are some awesome runners and weight lifters here, no questions asked. There is nowhere I said exercise was not a part of fitness. People do what they are capable of. There are Champion bodybuilders here, that is a choice. Marathon runners, and people who race all the time, again, their choice. I don't know your peeve here. I don't know your friends either.
  • Kalikel
    Kalikel Posts: 9,603 Member
    You should really ask the people what the deal was.

    I de-friend people who don't log in. I de-friend people I don't hear from. I deleted one person because the constant overeating and lame excuses got me thinking about indulging and I didn't want the influence.

    I doubt any of them even notice. Except for a small handful of people, I'd never notice if someone de-friended me and I'd never care, even if I did notice,

    Let it go. Concentrate on being the healthiest you that you can be. Welcome supporters and the hell with the others. Life is way too short to spend time wondering why someone de-friended you online, lol.
  • ljashley1952
    ljashley1952 Posts: 273 Member
    I'll friend you! I think people defriend people who stop logging in for a month or so. I'm guessing the reason is because they have a long list of 'friends' that they 'like' stuff for and if someone isn't logging in and participating they assume that you have moved on and remove you. I don't think there are many people who would defriend someone who is actively trying just because they didn't meet their goal. This is about support and not about meeting arbitrary goals. Goals can change. Especially someone who has lost the weight and is on maintenence. You should check in at least weekly, so people know you are still around.