The scale and binge eating will be the death of me. Help?

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ObsessedMonster
ObsessedMonster Posts: 150 Member
in Motivation and Support
I NEED to stop binging now, but I can't. I told myself countless of times that I would stop for good, only to binge a few days or even a few hours later. It's been a month since I started binging and I've gained around 5 pounds. This morning I wasn't happy with the number on the scale, so I took pictures of my newer fat self and compared them to the skinnier me. I cried all day long. This triggered yet another binge even after I punished myself with the pictures and the tears. I don't know what to do any more. I was so happy with my body a month ago, and now I can't stand looking myself in the mirror or even being in public. I feel extremely upset about this. I'm absolutely disgusted with myself even to the point where suicide doesn't seem like a bad idea. Everything's been a mess in my life so far, and this weight gain from these non stop binges isn't making it any better. If it weren't for my fear of vomiting, I would probably be purging at this very moment. But instead, I mentally implode and cry myself to sleep. Any advice?

Replies

  • diannethegeek
    diannethegeek Posts: 14,776 Member
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    If this is taking you to suicidal thoughts then you need to speak with a professional.
  • branflakes1980
    branflakes1980 Posts: 2,516 Member
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    You should speak to a doctor.
  • augusto73
    augusto73 Posts: 4 Member
    edited November 2014
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    Do not be so hard with yourself, It sounds like you are dealing with a lot right now. Some things are beyond our control and in such cases it is wise and mature to seek professional help. Make an appointment with a dr. Im sure he/she will be able to help.
  • Annr
    Annr Posts: 2,765 Member
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    Dont let numbers on the scale define you. You are worth more than that. Take control, eat for fuel not just for emotional sake. You take control, and give yourself more self-worth.
  • shai74
    shai74 Posts: 512 Member
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    Honey, go to a counsellor. 5lbs is not the end of the world, trust me. I can vary that much from week to week because of fluid. You need some healthy tactics to deal with what's going on in your head. Take a breath, go for a walk. Throw all of the crap out of your house and fill the fridge with carrot sticks and other things you can't overeat. Be a bit kind to yourself.

    If you feel bad, and hate yourself, then you will do unkind things to your body. If you tell yourself you're okay, you're doing the best you can, you deserve to be healthy and happy, then you will treat yourself accordingly. Before you put the food in your mouth, ask yourself if you really want to, or you're just punishing yourself for some reason. Find your motivation, whether it be to be healthier, to fit into "those shorts" or whatever else gets you there.

    But seriously, get help with whatever else is going on, because losing that 5lbs is not going to all of a sudden make everything else perfect. The eating and the weight gain are symptoms, not the cause of your unhappiness.
  • DeWoSa
    DeWoSa Posts: 496 Member
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    Go to the website for Overeaters Anonymous and find a meeting in your town. You will be with people who know EXACTLY what you are feeling and if it is the right choice for you, OA can help you find peace with food.
  • pleasepleaseno
    pleasepleaseno Posts: 166 Member
    edited November 2014
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    Hey man, you're not alone. I have been bulimic for 7 years. Bingeing and purging took over my life to the point that I was binging and purging multiple times a day. I was miserable, spending so much cash on food, hiding from friends family...please don't let it get that bad! Talk to a counselor trained in eating disorders and see what they can do for you. I wouldn't say i'm totally recovered, but i am significantly better than I was a year ago.
  • pleasepleaseno
    pleasepleaseno Posts: 166 Member
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    For a bit of self help, i recommend looking up CBT worksheets that can help you understand/manage your behvior

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