Cheat Days Scare Me...Help?

EquestrianLark135
EquestrianLark135 Posts: 98 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
I've been told and know from experience that not allowing yourself an occasional cheat day can drive you a bit mad. I have always been a huge chocolate addict as well as a major binge eater. Favorite lazy fat thing from the past=mindlessly stuffing my face w/ junk while watching TV. Now that I'm eating clean, it's like going through withdrawal. I have dreams about chocolate and pizza and all that jazz. When I watch TV, all I can think about is food. I'm also breaking the habit of eating before bed...I've done that for as long as I can remember.
Anyways...to my point...Cheat days. I do want to allow myself a cheat day every once in a while but I'm so scared to. A couple reasons...
1. I'm afraid I'll go crazy and eat a ridiculous amount of greasy, fatty, and sweet foods and the result at the end of the day will be me feeling like crap physically, as well as mentally because I'll feel like I've destroyed any progress I've made with that one gross day.
2. I'm afraid that I'll realize how much I missed that delicious, horrible stuff and fall out of my diet. That has happened before.
So what do you do as far as cheat days go? Do I just need to fight through the awful, almost painful cravings and crazy and not allow any cheating? If I do allow a cheat day, how often should it be? Once a week seems like reversing week-long progress to me. So maybe once a month?
I desperately want but am equally scared of junk food!!
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Replies

  • KylaDenay
    KylaDenay Posts: 1,585 Member
    All foods in moderation every day of the week and making it fit in my daily goal. Deprivation is not the key to success. Moderation is the key to success and consistency.
  • Annabear3
    Annabear3 Posts: 92 Member
    I don't do cheat days. I have treats here and there and I fit them into my calories. That way I don't binge. If I have the room in my diet that day, I can have it if I really want it.
  • VegasFit
    VegasFit Posts: 1,232 Member
    Everyone is different and my personality is generally all in or not. When I was losing the majority of my weight I didn't really allow for cheats but as I've gotten closer I do splurge but it tends to be on weekends. Not necessarily the entire day but I will go out for a meal and not worry about what I am ordering. What has also worked for me is not having anything that I know I can't control myself around in my house. Popcorn, cereal, peanut butter, ice cream, for example. If I want items like that I have them outside of the house. In addition my cravings and foods I find satisfying have changed too. I wish I could be that person that had a bag of Hershey kisses at home and only had a couple a day but sadly I am not.
  • jacksonpt
    jacksonpt Posts: 10,413 Member
    Those are valid concerns... a few thoughts from someone with similar tendencies:

    1) figure out your triggers (foods, locations, time of day) and avoid/control them.
    2) figure out how to work in "treats" on a daily basis rather than having a cheat day.
    3) If you must cheat, allow yourself a cheat meal rather than a cheat day
  • EquestrianLark135
    EquestrianLark135 Posts: 98 Member
    VegasFit, exactly the same for me. If it's in my house, the temptation is on me non-stop. The hard part is my boyfriend isn't doing this so he gets what food he wants and I basically have to ask him to hide it from me.

    I've considered allowing myself an occasional treat when I have the cals, but I tend to get the thought "oh I've already ruined the day w/ that one treat so I might as well eat whatever now and try again tomorrow"... don't ask, because I don't know where that mind-set came from, but it has happened plenty of times!

    I guess I just need more self-control. :/
  • Lasmartchika
    Lasmartchika Posts: 3,440 Member
    One thing I've learned.... Depriving yourself of foods = binging.

    Learn to eat in moderation. The foods you want to eat, serve yourself a serving size and enjoy that. You have to learn to have self control. Say you want some ice cream, serve yourself a little bowfull (measure, log it) and put the rest of the ice cream away. Once you're done eating the bowlfull you served yourself, that's it. And you make it fit into your calories for the day. :flowerforyou:
  • esjones12
    esjones12 Posts: 1,363 Member
    Fellow equestrian here! :) I do cheat meals not cheat days. 24 hours is WAY too long to be unrestricted for me. Personally I do max of two meals a week. It usually is on the weekend and I make sure it is really worth it. I have found my "splurges" are not nearly as "splurgy" as they used to be the longer I continue my healthy logging. My tastes have changed and I get sick off of sweet/greasy stuff much quicker, and I don't stuff myself as full as I used to. That all happened naturally. I also like to do my cheat as dinner because then I can wake up and get right back with my healthy breakfast instead of doing the "well I already ruined today I mise well eat this junk for dinner too" thing. I do struggle with feeling guilty, but I am getting better with accepting that I am human and a bottle of wine and some candy on Halloween isn't worth getting super upset about. I find the more I obsess about the calories or the cheats or the tiny little details, the more frustrated I am and the less the scale likes to go down.

    In the end you have to find what works for you. As long as the scale is going down over time and you are healthy and happy, that is all that really matters. Best of luck!!
  • ahoy_m8
    ahoy_m8 Posts: 3,053 Member
    Hi. I've seen posts like yours on here several times, and they always seem to generate a lot of conversation. I think it's because there are lots of "right ways" to do it and it really just boils down to personal preference.

    The key is log every single morsel, crumb or sip that passes your lips with no fudging. You can undo a whole week of steady deficits with one fall off the wagon, but you won't ever really know that unless you log it. And then you wonder what went wrong when 99% of the time you're on track.

    FWIW, to your second fear, usually the opposite happens for me. If there's a treat I've been salivating over with unusual gusto, most of the time when I actually have it, it's kind of a let down and I realize I was making a bigger deal of it than it was worth.

    Personally, cheat days don't work for me at all. I'm better off having a reasonable calorie budget and eating stuff I genuinely enjoy all the time. Even chocolate. Pizza, not so much for me. Learning to satisfy the taste for junk food with a very small taste (that you weigh)helps.

  • brightsideofpink
    brightsideofpink Posts: 1,018 Member
    I think there's a lot of real estate between strictly following clean eating or daily calorie limits, and an all out cheat day.

    I don't do cheat days.
    I also don't make everything I eat fit into my 1400 daily calories.

    I do enjoy treats quite often and the occasional decadent meal. If I know it will make me go over, I save a few hundred every day leading up. Or work out extra before or after.

    I still log everything. Even if I'm going to end up 800 calories over, I log it so I know what I have to work with.

    I've told myself I can go big for special occasions- birthdays, holidays, etc. But when the day comes, I've yet to go so far over that I can't balance it out in the week.

    My best advice is to plan, and then choose wisely. If chocolate cake is your thing, plan and go for it. Just don't have the giant bacon burger with the keg of beer and the chocolate cake all on the same day. And don't waste your calories on things that just aren't worth it anymore.
  • EquestrianLark135
    EquestrianLark135 Posts: 98 Member
    jacksonpt, Good tips. :smile: Getting control is something I need to work on, and once I have that self-control, it will be easier to allow myself something occasionally w/out screwing up and causing guilt.
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  • Menix8
    Menix8 Posts: 210 Member
    jacksonpt wrote: »
    Those are valid concerns... a few thoughts from someone with similar tendencies:

    1) figure out your triggers (foods, locations, time of day) and avoid/control them.
    2) figure out how to work in "treats" on a daily basis rather than having a cheat day.
    3) If you must cheat, allow yourself a cheat meal rather than a cheat day

    ^^^ I agree with most of this. If you're afraid you'll lose control, then plan it out ahead of time when you have a level-head, and if you can work in little treats and feel satisfied, that's great.

    If you do opt for a meal where you don't count calories, the only thing I would advise is to not think of it as a "cheat" meal. Using the word "cheat" implies that it's bad, that you "fell off the wagon", that you should feel guilty and atone. It's not "cheating." It's literally part of your diet. You are planning to have one meal a week where you don't track calories. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that, and it's not "cheating."
  • bulbadoof
    bulbadoof Posts: 1,058 Member
    edited November 2014
    I don't do cheat days, I just make it fit.

    One of my go-to chocolate fixes is banana oatmeal cookies (mash 2 bananas, mix with 1 cup oatmeal, and add 1-2 tbsp of chocolate chips, bake at 350 for 10-15 on parchment paper). They're nutritious and filling, which makes it hard to eat too much OR feel sick.
  • skinnyforhi
    skinnyforhi Posts: 340 Member
    Starting a new lifestyle is hard, but after 2-3 weeks if you are still having crazy cravings, I have to wonder if you are eating enough, and if you are eating things that you enjoy. Just because you no longer have a burger and fries for lunch doesn't mean you can't eat something that is tasty and satisfying. Are you planning your meals and snacks around healthier alternatives to your favorites? Are you trying new things to discover what you might like? My second piece of advice is to banish the word "cheat." Anything can fit in this lifestyle. Also, there's a huge difference between going over by 200-300 calories and going over by 700 or more. Get past the mental block (and trust me, it's mental) of feeling like you failed because you went over, and now it's open season for all your favorites. I know it's difficult but you can do it! Good luck!
  • jillmarie125
    jillmarie125 Posts: 418 Member
    What is your calorie goal? When you say clean...do you mean healthier foods than before? I don't know...if you really are dreaming about food and think about food while you watch tv, maybe you are not eating enough to satisfy yourself during the day? Just a thought...
  • EquestrianLark135
    EquestrianLark135 Posts: 98 Member
    These are some awesome and extremely helpful tips everyone. I definitely think I am being much too strict. I get crushed if I'm even 5 calories over my goal. I need to realize that those cals didn't throw 10lbs on my waist. lol I honestly couldn't even guess the amount of calories I was eating before this...a pretty disgusting amount considering all the fast food and sweets. I need to find a happy-medium between controlling myself but also having some leniency.
  • Capt_Apollo
    Capt_Apollo Posts: 9,026 Member
    jacksonpt wrote: »
    Those are valid concerns... a few thoughts from someone with similar tendencies:

    1) figure out your triggers (foods, locations, time of day) and avoid/control them.
    2) figure out how to work in "treats" on a daily basis rather than having a cheat day.
    3) If you must cheat, allow yourself a cheat meal rather than a cheat day
    this
  • EquestrianLark135
    EquestrianLark135 Posts: 98 Member
    BFDeal wrote: »
    EquestrianLark135 wrote: »
    Favorite lazy fat thing from the past=mindlessly stuffing my face w/ junk while watching TV.
    You had me at hello.

    I looked forward to doing that after work like I was going home to Christmas presents. haha Good times that happened to be the cause of this waist, thighs and butt!
  • EquestrianLark135
    EquestrianLark135 Posts: 98 Member
    jillmarie125 wrote: »
    What is your calorie goal? When you say clean...do you mean healthier foods than before? I don't know...if you really are dreaming about food and think about food while you watch tv, maybe you are not eating enough to satisfy yourself during the day? Just a thought...
    My calorie goal is 1700, which yes, is well below the amount of calories I had to have been eating before eating clean. We had fast food for lunch and dinner every day with tons of chips, chocolate, ice cream,etc. between those meals. And of course, no exercise. My stomach is used to having food in it ALL THE TIME and now I'm spacing out snacks and small meals every 3 hours or so. This results in always being hungry and craving everything.
  • EquestrianLark135
    EquestrianLark135 Posts: 98 Member
    bulbadoof wrote: »
    I don't do cheat days, I just make it fit.

    One of my go-to chocolate fixes is banana oatmeal cookies (mash 2 bananas, mix with 1 cup oatmeal, and add 1-2 tbsp of chocolate chips, bake at 350 for 10-15 on parchment paper). They're nutritious and filling, which makes it hard to eat too much OR feel sick.
    Sounds delicious!! I'll definitely be trying it. :smile:
  • fivethreeone
    fivethreeone Posts: 8,196 Member
    jacksonpt wrote: »
    Those are valid concerns... a few thoughts from someone with similar tendencies:

    1) figure out your triggers (foods, locations, time of day) and avoid/control them.
    2) figure out how to work in "treats" on a daily basis rather than having a cheat day.
    3) If you must cheat, allow yourself a cheat meal rather than a cheat day

    All this. Personally, I am against the concept of cutting anything out completely, except that chips like to challenge my philosophies with the reality of OMGNOMNOMNOMgeddinMYMOUF.

    So I don't buy chips anymore.

    Alas.
  • Zephalia
    Zephalia Posts: 79 Member
    In reading your post it sounds like you consider a cheat day going all out.

    Here is what I consider a cheat day - I went to an all you can eat buffet on the weekend and ate more than my daily intake in one sitting. That was my cheat day. I don't do it once a week, maybe once a month. It was not pre-meditated and I didn't eat myself into a coma...I just had what I wanted...some steak, pizza, mac & cheese, ribs - it all adds up but it was delicious and I logged it and the day was done.

    Another example of one of my cheat days. The weather is snowy, my work week has been stressful, I've kept on track all week and it's Friday night, I'm at home alone and decide to have a few beers followed by too many chips and some salsa, then later a bowl of ice cream while I watch a movie. I went over my intake by maybe 1000 calories for the day. I log it and forget it. Sometimes I need to allow myself those moments because if I didn't, I would never be able to get back on track and stick to my plan. I cannot eliminate the foods I love - I can only moderate them.

    And another note, part of the reason I feel successful in my weight loss is that I don't cut out those snacky foods all week long and then binge one day on them. I allow myself a piece of chocolate or two here and there, some chips in the evening, a glass of wine...I just adjust my calorie intake for the rest of the day to allow it. That way, I never feel like I've deprived myself of the foods I love.
  • fivethreeone
    fivethreeone Posts: 8,196 Member
    (Also, I don't have cheat days. I just enjoy what I want in moderation and make it fit my calories and macros. It takes some planning, but it isn't too hard. Except for chips. Sigh. But I covered that already.)
  • 365andstillalive
    365andstillalive Posts: 663 Member
    I too love to mindlessly eat, so I know that "cheat days" don't really work for me. What I do instead is still track my calories but stay below the amount I would gain weight on (maintenance for me is somewhere between 2100-2200). Giving myself that extra 500 cals or so makes me feel like I've been able to have whatever it was I wanted, without actually risking putting back on any body fat. I probably do this once every week or two.

    If I know I've got a big weekend coming up where things will be a little harder to control (ex. weddings, camping) I'll run a weekly total and cut an extra 100-200 calories each day throughout the week to give myself more calories to work with come the weekend.

    It's a lifestyle change, and learning self-control is a big part of it. Personally I've found that I get nothing out of binging on goodies other than a sore stomach now that I've been eating healthy for a few years. That does help with the self-control haha
  • EquestrianLark135
    EquestrianLark135 Posts: 98 Member
    skinnyforhi wrote: »
    Starting a new lifestyle is hard, but after 2-3 weeks if you are still having crazy cravings, I have to wonder if you are eating enough, and if you are eating things that you enjoy. Just because you no longer have a burger and fries for lunch doesn't mean you can't eat something that is tasty and satisfying. Are you planning your meals and snacks around healthier alternatives to your favorites? Are you trying new things to discover what you might like? My second piece of advice is to banish the word "cheat." Anything can fit in this lifestyle. Also, there's a huge difference between going over by 200-300 calories and going over by 700 or more. Get past the mental block (and trust me, it's mental) of feeling like you failed because you went over, and now it's open season for all your favorites. I know it's difficult but you can do it! Good luck!
    Thank you so much. Very motivating and makes me feel a lot better and not so scared. haha :) I'm just getting into my second week of this and I'm hungry and craving all the time. I'm hoping it's just my stomach shrinking and adapting to the fewer cals and more structured eating throughout the day. Healthier alternatives to my favorites...I didn't think of that.
    I definitely agree that I need to try new things and find some yummy recipes because the same old fruit, veggies, and string cheese (ok I eat a bit more than that) are all getting very old and boring. Of course, that results in losing motivation and wanting the "old life" back. I'll be looking at recipes on here. :smile:
    Thanks again!!
  • Mexicanbigfoot
    Mexicanbigfoot Posts: 520 Member
    KylaDenay wrote: »
    All foods in moderation every day of the week and making it fit in my daily goal. Deprivation is not the key to success. Moderation is the key to success and consistency.

    Exactly!! I have done this and so far, I've lost 58 pounds in a little over 160 days. If I want a piece of candy or pizza, I have it. (I know that I, too, love sweets and I love to binge eat so depravation does NOT work for me. Also, cheat days seems to turn into cheat weeks etc) Some days I am over calories, some days I am under. I walk for cardio. You will make it work for you. Good luck!! :smiley:
  • nuttynanners
    nuttynanners Posts: 249 Member
    Hey! I feel the same way. In the past I lost several pounds using MFP but I gained it back over time. Now I'm determined to get healthy and stay healthy.

    I, too, am fearing "cheat days". Since I'm only on week 2 for now, I've decided to wait until I've been at this for a month to reward myself with my "cheat". It just so happens that two weeks from now is Thanksgiving, and I am going to try having one cheat MEAL instead of a cheat DAY, that way I don't go too overboard with the snacks.

    My thanksgiving cheat plan, which I plan to repeat for future cheat meals, is to fill my plate with everything I want to eat. One big-*kitten* plate without calorie and carb counting. I'll also allow myself a dessert. Oh, and a beer! I miss my beer.

    I think that savoring one meal is a better idea for me because the idea of an all day smorgasbord (which, undoubtedly, is how I've gained all this weight twice over) would trigger some of my bad habits (i.e. Boredom eating, Netflix eating, Social eating, Too many alcoholic beverages, etc.).

    Having a plan laid out ahead of time always seems to work best for me. But whatever works for you!
  • EquestrianLark135
    EquestrianLark135 Posts: 98 Member
    Thanks again to everybody! You're all extremely motivating and it's good to know I'm not the only crazy binge eater out there. :wink: I feel much more relaxed with allowing myself something every now and then when I have the calories and I'll work on being ok with occasionally going over my goal. Self-control w/ moderation.
  • bwogilvie
    bwogilvie Posts: 2,130 Member
    OP: I don't do cheat days, in the sense many people use of "a day when I eat whatever I damn well want without bothering to log it or stick to my calorie goal."

    I do have days when I will deliberately go over my calorie goal, because it's a special event, or I'm going to a great restaurant and really want to enjoy myself. I factor those into my weekly meal planning. I also see my daily/weekly goals as aspirational; right now I'm almost at maintenance, and I have MFP's goal set so I lose about half a pound a week. I'm OK with losing a quarter pound, though, or even losing just half a pound a month right now.

    So maybe the way to split the difference for you is to have a day every now and then when you permit yourself to indulge yourself a bit, but you do log everything. After all, your log is your way to be accountable to yourself, not to anyone else.

    And as others have said, don't cut out any food that you don't want to cut out for the rest of your life. Just learn to enjoy it in moderation. As Dr. Yoni Freedhoff advises, ask yourself this: how little of this do I need to eat to be satisfied?
  • jaquelynny
    jaquelynny Posts: 94 Member
    I AM A CHEAT DAY LOVER!
    it works for me there are days i go all out and days i don't, but i love it and keeps me compliant and losing and lean, and surprisingly keeps me from binging on any other day
    days starts out with a handful of gummy bears, the a healthy breakfast before i hit the gym for my heaviest training day of the week, then a shake followed by pizza or pancakes or something like that, maybe some ice cream and or cookies, then dinner is pasta or mexican with a couple drinks

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