Staying positive on this journey!
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FierceFabulousConfident
Posts: 22
Hello! I’m Shannon Marie
I have been overweight for the majority of my live and have been on this uphill battle and journey of weight loss for a very long time. 8+ years to be accurate. I am only 25, for goodness sake!
(Note: Please bear with me while I not so beautifully get things out)
Earlier this year I made a commitment to get healthy, not skinny. I was to be turning 25 in March and I felt like I lived my life on the side lines, never actually living. I wanted to give myself another day to live with the love of my life. I researched and researched until my head exploded, so much information on the damn internet. But, you know what happened. Another round of fad diets, weight loss gimmicks and no weight loss and a lot of weight gain over the years.
I lived a not so great childhood, adopted into a family that seemed loving on the outside but riddled with mental and emotional abuse. 25 years of it and the only thing I felt I could control was my food. In May, I was forced to cut off all contact with them due to threats and hateful messages. So much so, that I had to change contact information. It wasn’t what I wanted to happen, but it needed to. My idealized thought of the perfect family shattered. My daddy no longer there to walk me down the aisle. I was heart broken. But, then I realized my excuse of why I was fat and unhealthy was gone. I was scared. Now what? Now what if I try again and I fail? Worse yet, what if I succeed? I haven’t had much success in life…I’m scared of it. I self sabotage like the best.
On October 20th, 2014 the love of my life (and my future husband) and I had a short but very moving conversation. It hurt to hear how worried and scared he was about losing me. It hurt to hear him hurting. I never once realized how much time he spent daily thinking about my health and well being. We both agreed that we are still in the very beginning of our life together but we are not enjoying life like we should! We stay away from things we both would enjoy to do together because of my weight. Because I am not confident in my body. Because I do not feel comfortable. Because I get so tired by doing anything. Because I have aches and pains. This is NOT how you should start a marriage.
So on October 21st, 2014) I did a lot of thinking. Why have I not been successful in the past 8+ years? Is it because I haven't had enough motivation, drive and determination? Is it because I am weak? Is it because I haven't had the elusive A-HA moment? In my opinion, these are all factors but it is not the actual reason as to why. What I have figured out today is because I am scared. I have fears about actually changing. Fear can be so crippling. So, I decided to work on a short list of my goals and aspirations as well as my fears. Since then, I've started to watch my eating more closely, started a workout program on Monday (11.10.14), started working on personal development and I've even lost weight! I've come here to get a better reign on my eating.
Goals & Aspirations:
- To take back ownership of my life
- To be CONFIDENT!
- To live a long, healthy life with Tim - To travel and be active (Hike, Swim, ETC.)
- To compete in races, against no one but myself
- To be me physically and mentally
Fears:
- To be me, what if people don't like who I am becoming?
- What if I fail?
- What if I set a goal and never make it? (Size, weight, race, etc.)
- Stepping out of my comfort zone
It's interesting to me how on these two lists there are some similarities, how some things that are my goals are also my fears. But, I've come to the conclusion that I'll never know how great I could be if I don't drop the excuses and chase my dreams.
In my journey I want to be very transparent with all of you, I want to be real and raw. And, I want to get to know others that are the same! Please add me if you feel that we would hit it off, with a message would be appreciated!
Today I am working on setting myself up for success. Will you work on it with me?
Today is my tomorrow. Drop the excuses and let's do this together!
XOXO, Shannon Marie
IG: @FierceFabulousConfident
FB: www.facebook.com/fiercefabulousconfident
Email: fiercefabulousconfident@gmail.com
P.S. Thank you for dealing with my thoughts if you've made it all the way through!
I have been overweight for the majority of my live and have been on this uphill battle and journey of weight loss for a very long time. 8+ years to be accurate. I am only 25, for goodness sake!
(Note: Please bear with me while I not so beautifully get things out)
Earlier this year I made a commitment to get healthy, not skinny. I was to be turning 25 in March and I felt like I lived my life on the side lines, never actually living. I wanted to give myself another day to live with the love of my life. I researched and researched until my head exploded, so much information on the damn internet. But, you know what happened. Another round of fad diets, weight loss gimmicks and no weight loss and a lot of weight gain over the years.
I lived a not so great childhood, adopted into a family that seemed loving on the outside but riddled with mental and emotional abuse. 25 years of it and the only thing I felt I could control was my food. In May, I was forced to cut off all contact with them due to threats and hateful messages. So much so, that I had to change contact information. It wasn’t what I wanted to happen, but it needed to. My idealized thought of the perfect family shattered. My daddy no longer there to walk me down the aisle. I was heart broken. But, then I realized my excuse of why I was fat and unhealthy was gone. I was scared. Now what? Now what if I try again and I fail? Worse yet, what if I succeed? I haven’t had much success in life…I’m scared of it. I self sabotage like the best.
On October 20th, 2014 the love of my life (and my future husband) and I had a short but very moving conversation. It hurt to hear how worried and scared he was about losing me. It hurt to hear him hurting. I never once realized how much time he spent daily thinking about my health and well being. We both agreed that we are still in the very beginning of our life together but we are not enjoying life like we should! We stay away from things we both would enjoy to do together because of my weight. Because I am not confident in my body. Because I do not feel comfortable. Because I get so tired by doing anything. Because I have aches and pains. This is NOT how you should start a marriage.
So on October 21st, 2014) I did a lot of thinking. Why have I not been successful in the past 8+ years? Is it because I haven't had enough motivation, drive and determination? Is it because I am weak? Is it because I haven't had the elusive A-HA moment? In my opinion, these are all factors but it is not the actual reason as to why. What I have figured out today is because I am scared. I have fears about actually changing. Fear can be so crippling. So, I decided to work on a short list of my goals and aspirations as well as my fears. Since then, I've started to watch my eating more closely, started a workout program on Monday (11.10.14), started working on personal development and I've even lost weight! I've come here to get a better reign on my eating.
Goals & Aspirations:
- To take back ownership of my life
- To be CONFIDENT!
- To live a long, healthy life with Tim - To travel and be active (Hike, Swim, ETC.)
- To compete in races, against no one but myself
- To be me physically and mentally
Fears:
- To be me, what if people don't like who I am becoming?
- What if I fail?
- What if I set a goal and never make it? (Size, weight, race, etc.)
- Stepping out of my comfort zone
It's interesting to me how on these two lists there are some similarities, how some things that are my goals are also my fears. But, I've come to the conclusion that I'll never know how great I could be if I don't drop the excuses and chase my dreams.
In my journey I want to be very transparent with all of you, I want to be real and raw. And, I want to get to know others that are the same! Please add me if you feel that we would hit it off, with a message would be appreciated!
Today I am working on setting myself up for success. Will you work on it with me?
Today is my tomorrow. Drop the excuses and let's do this together!
XOXO, Shannon Marie
IG: @FierceFabulousConfident
FB: www.facebook.com/fiercefabulousconfident
Email: fiercefabulousconfident@gmail.com
P.S. Thank you for dealing with my thoughts if you've made it all the way through!
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Replies
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Great goals! Now for the work part.
One of my favorite sayings is, "To go fast, go alone. To go far, go together. Get some friends on here, get involved in the forums (avoid the drama, though), and start piling those days on...one after the other. Good luck! 0 -
Great goals! Now for the work part. One of my favorite sayings is, "To go fast, go alone. To go far, go together. Get some friends on here, get involved in the forums (avoid the drama, though), and start piling those days on...one after the other. Good luck!
Thank you, jzalisa! That is definitely the plan, hoping to gain some very motivated and positive puerile on this site!
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What a great introduction and I agree, great goals. As far as your fear that people won't like you, you have to be yourself!! You know that old saying "Those who matter don't mind and Those who mind don't matter" Feel free to add me and we'll motivate each other along the way.0
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Good luck in acheiving your goals! Don't give up! 0 -
What a great introduction and I agree, great goals. As far as your fear that people won't like you, you have to be yourself!! You know that old saying "Those who matter don't mind and Those who mind don't matter" Feel free to add me and we'll motivate each other along the way.
Thank you, CatK15! You're so very right, i shouldn't care and I'm working on that! I'll add you now!
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theskipper54 wrote: » Good luck in acheiving your goals! Don't give up!
Thank you very much, you as well!
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Hello and Welcome!0
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redfisher1974 wrote: »Hello and Welcome!
Thank you!0 -
I had a really great first day yesterday! About to go and get some exercise in now!0
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You can do it girl.I did a half hour workout too. 0
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You could blog here. I think you would write some interesting stuff!
Feel free to add me.0 -
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CariJean64 wrote: »You could blog here. I think you would write some interesting stuff!
Feel free to add me.
You know, I'll have to think about doing a blog. I'll start it today with just my intro and then work on it more come December once I'm settled after the move. Thanks! I'll add you!
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