Getting used to the new you

librarysteg
librarysteg Posts: 29 Member
Not sure if this is the best category for this, but how long has it taken you to get used to the new you? I'm about 10 pounds away from goal, and I still don't really recognize myself when I look in the mirror. I still get a lot of comments from people who are just noticing my weight loss, and I wonder when those will stop? It's mostly a positive feeling because I love the way I look now, and I enjoy the attention, but it also doesn't feel real. I feel like the "real" me is the me that weighs over 210 pounds so who is this new person? Does this make sense? Can anyone relate?
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Replies

  • Flookbird
    Flookbird Posts: 81 Member
    I absolutely know what you mean! I am getting a little bit worried about it now tbh and think I need to stop losing weight. I'm worried about how I'll feel when people stop paying me compliments about it. I only really realise what I look like when I see a photo, rather than when I look in the mirror. I have been overweight my entire adult (and late teenage) life and am now 32. I've lost 80lbs since January so it's going to take some time I think. I now need some new goals to take the place of the weight loss goals I have had for the past year. Well done for your achievements.
  • laineybz
    laineybz Posts: 704 Member
    It took me a while but I'm used to the new me now. I've been maintaining for around a year and a half. I find it a bit odd when new people start at my work and have no idea that I was alot bigger before. I don't really get many comments regarding my loss anymore, i get more comments about how "good" i am with my eating. I work in an office, so would be very easy to just eat whatever but i bring my own food in. Well done to both of you on your losses!
  • LivingtheLeanDream
    LivingtheLeanDream Posts: 13,342 Member
    laineybz wrote: »
    It took me a while but I'm used to the new me now. I've been maintaining for around a year and a half. I find it a bit odd when new people start at my work and have no idea that I was alot bigger before. I don't really get many comments regarding my loss anymore, i get more comments about how "good" i am with my eating. I work in an office, so would be very easy to just eat whatever but i bring my own food in. Well done to both of you on your losses!

    ^^ same goes for me, it's extremely rare for anyone to say anything now but recently someone at church who sees me every week I might add :) mentioned my loss - I wonder where they've been that it took them 1 1/2 yrs to notice lol
  • dopeysmelly
    dopeysmelly Posts: 1,390 Member
    I'm still not used to it. I don't have any decent mirrors at home, so every time I catch myself in a store or at the office, I do a double-take. I still look down and think I've got the huge butt, thighs, stomach, when in reality I'm small. It doesn't bother me though. I'll get used to the 70 lb loss eventually, but won't spend time worrying if it takes a while.
  • librarydebster
    librarydebster Posts: 177 Member
    I've been losing since January of this year and I'm still amazed that my body has resculpted the way it has. Changes in my shins, thighs, arms, hips...I'm so pleased when I see a pic of myself and don't see my fat self anymore. I'm about 20 pounds away from my goal and looking forward to more changes. I'm glad you are feeling positive. I can definitely relate to that.
  • librarysteg
    librarysteg Posts: 29 Member
    I'm glad to see other people are taking a little while to get used to all these changes. I agree about setting up some new goals for this new year that are less about weight loss. I should reach my ultimate goal weight by March so I know I'll spend the bulk of the year just figuring out how maintenance will work for me. I've started running and ran my first 5K this month so I think I'll have a lot of fitness goals. I have my eye on a 10K for April. One thing that's bothering me a little is when I see pictures of myself from before the weight loss, I REALLY don't like how I looked, and I feel embarrassed that I spent so many years looking like that. I'm trying not to dwell on that because it's the past, and I know it doesn't help anything, but I definitely still have some inner work to do as I work on the outer.
  • Not sure if this is the best category for this, but how long has it taken you to get used to the new you? I'm about 10 pounds away from goal, and I still don't really recognize myself when I look in the mirror. I still get a lot of comments from people who are just noticing my weight loss, and I wonder when those will stop? It's mostly a positive feeling because I love the way I look now, and I enjoy the attention, but it also doesn't feel real. I feel like the "real" me is the me that weighs over 210 pounds so who is this new person? Does this make sense? Can anyone relate?

    Perfect sense & 100% can relate.

    It is a bit surreal and only time will allow us to acclimate to the new physique.

    I didn't wear horizontal stripes until about 18 mos after I lost the weight because it was ingrained in my head that I can't pull it off, it will just make me look wider.

    Every now & again I still unconsciously have this repeating nightmare that it's all a dream & when I wake I will be an Oompa Loompa again. But then I look at my clothing size & my 'pulse check' weight in and realize yea this is me, it wasn't a fluke.

    So I guess just give yourself some time to embrace the new you or at the very least be confident that it wasn't by chance that you got to where you are. :D

  • 4ever420
    4ever420 Posts: 4,088 Member
    I can totally relate, it's so surreal. Until now I've never been a normal weight and it's a lot to wrap my brain around sometimes. Glad others can relate because no one in my real life really understands.
  • dopeysmelly
    dopeysmelly Posts: 1,390 Member
    One thing that's bothering me a little is when I see pictures of myself from before the weight loss, I REALLY don't like how I looked, and I feel embarrassed that I spent so many years looking like that. I'm trying not to dwell on that because it's the past, and I know it doesn't help anything, but I definitely still have some inner work to do as I work on the outer.

    I can relate to this, but I've gotten over it by thinking of all the other things I achieved in my life during that period. I worked on other areas, and then it was turn for me to work on myself!
  • stuffinmuffin
    stuffinmuffin Posts: 985 Member
    I've been maintaining for about 3 and a half years now and I struggle to remember the old me! OR sometimes I would remember old habits or my attitude and almost be shocked that I was like that! MFP has really educated me for the better!
  • librarysteg
    librarysteg Posts: 29 Member

    I can relate to this, but I've gotten over it by thinking of all the other things I achieved in my life during that period. I worked on other areas, and then it was turn for me to work on myself!

    That's a great way to look at it. While I was heavy, I was having my girls and adjusting to life as a mother. All of my energy was focused outward and that was okay, but now I have the time and energy to not always put myself last.
  • salembambi
    salembambi Posts: 5,585 Member
    I gained a lot of weight in a short period of time so being the size I am now feels like me 150% more than being over 300 pounds ever did

    so its been fairly easy for me to get use to my new size..i feel like myself again

    I will say though that it is still sometimes pretty surreal like DAYUM look at me surreal lol
  • AShannon54
    AShannon54 Posts: 111 Member
    One thing that's bothering me a little is when I see pictures of myself from before the weight loss, I REALLY don't like how I looked, and I feel embarrassed that I spent so many years looking like that. I'm trying not to dwell on that because it's the past, and I know it doesn't help anything, but I definitely still have some inner work to do as I work on the outer.

    I feel the same way about seeing older pictures of myself. I have lost over 120 lbs in the last year and I am ready to just be 'the new me'.

    It was exciting and encouraging to have everyone say nice things about my weight loss but I am ready to move on and 'just be me'. I want to forget I was ever that overweight person. Now when someone says "you look so great and have lost so much weight" I feel a little bummed out. It's totally weird... I used to love the compliments.

    I guess I just want to start to settle into 'maintenance phase' of my life and start to say goodbye to the 'extreme weight loss' part of my life (and forget the 'morbidly obese' part of my life).

  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    I can relate. I get lots of positive comments from work-mates and family. They comment frequently how much I have changed. I notice when I drop a size and suddenly I have to go shopping for a new wardrobe. That is annoying, though my granddaughter keeps reminding me that it is all good.

    I have very interesting things happening to my belly area. I am forming that flabby blob of excess skin that obese people get when they lose a significant amount of weight. I am starting to tuck it in to my pants. The closest analogy I can come to is what my belly looked like immediately after delivering my babies. One huge deflated balloon. This time though it won't bounce back.

    On the plus side, I absolutely love my newfound mobility and strength.

    So yes, a new body. An interesting one. It will take a while to get used to it.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    Did I mention that my poor boobs float around in my bra like lost goldfish? I have to adjust them once in a while so they point in the same direction.
  • sw33tp3a11
    sw33tp3a11 Posts: 4,646 Member
    jgnatca wrote: »
    Did I mention that my poor boobs float around in my bra like lost goldfish? I have to adjust them once in a while so they point in the same direction.

    Lol This made me laugh...



  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
    Not sure if this is the best category for this, but how long has it taken you to get used to the new you? I'm about 10 pounds away from goal, and I still don't really recognize myself when I look in the mirror. I still get a lot of comments from people who are just noticing my weight loss, and I wonder when those will stop? It's mostly a positive feeling because I love the way I look now, and I enjoy the attention, but it also doesn't feel real. I feel like the "real" me is the me that weighs over 210 pounds so who is this new person? Does this make sense? Can anyone relate?

    I'm in exactly the same position - possibly around 10 lbs to go though I'm fine with now - and not recognising / bordering on not liking what I see in the mirror

    I'm trying to adjust my sense of self and work out how to dress - it's very odd, I miss my highly pronounced hourglass, I used to feel sexy now I don't recognise that shape in the mirror as much

    I think it's all about shopping, I need to get a personal shopper to dress me for my new shape so I can see what suits and makes me feel great (they're free in the big stores here, and salaried not on commission so it's truly independent advice) problem is with weight still to lose that's still in the future

    Anyway posting to say I get it :smile:
  • CassieReannan
    CassieReannan Posts: 1,479 Member
    Still getting used to it. I've always been bigger than most and gained a ton of weight when I graduated high school. I've been losing weight for almost 3 years. It's only been in the past year I have noticed how much my bodies changing. I picked up a size 10 pants and laughed, thinking I would NEVER fit into that. I took it home realizing I made a stupid mistake and would just return it, but it actually fit me. I was lost for words.

    I still see someone different in the mirror. I'm trying to adjust, I'm getting there.
  • CipherZero
    CipherZero Posts: 1,418 Member
    To be completely self-serving, I've written a blog post on MFP about exactly this on Monday.

    The tl;dr is "I'm not there yet" with accepting how I look now isn't how I looked then.
  • Qskim
    Qskim Posts: 1,145 Member
    jgnatca wrote: »
    Did I mention that my poor boobs float around in my bra like lost goldfish? I have to adjust them once in a while so they point in the same direction.
    Haha that's me!

    Op it took me about 6 months to adjust to what I saw in mirror. Even clothes shopping was odd because I couldn't figure out what was wrong until after many shops, a shop assistant pointed out the clothes I was trying on were too big. Doh!
  • pkw58
    pkw58 Posts: 2,038 Member
    I have been maintaining since July of 2012... still think someone is going to catch me walking to the dress room with my new size and send me back to the old me size. My weight loss program included 4 stages - one was called "stabilization" before maintenance. I continued to lose weight during stabilization and so I think I really need to realize this is the normal me. I get you OP!
  • Bekk927
    Bekk927 Posts: 14 Member
    I lost the majority of my weight last year and for about 6 months afterwards every time I looked at my hands ( like when typing ) they just didnt look right - like they weren't mine. It was an odd feeling but its gone mostly now
  • HaibaneReki
    HaibaneReki Posts: 373 Member
    +1 to OP, I'm not fully used to it either. Other than dismissing comments ASAP (it gets old) I from time to time "convert" people to MFP :smile: circle of weight-loss

    I still enjoy the small "new" things - normal shopping, my Koss Porta Pro wrapping comfortable around my neck, new-found stamina at sports etc.

    Anyway, the feeling that is strongest from them all is dread that the old me could come back so easily - my brain still needs firm self-discipline to not binge on cake, chocolate and whatnot. I'm left dreaming of not counting calories.. Another year, maybe..
  • ILiftHeavyAcrylics
    ILiftHeavyAcrylics Posts: 27,732 Member
    It took me about 6 months to adjust. Give it time; this whole process is as much mental as physical.
  • librarysteg
    librarysteg Posts: 29 Member
    Thanks for sharing so many similar stories. Today I noticed my picture on our employee photo wall at work, and it was taken at my heaviest. I've found myself wondering if I should request a new photo or leave it there as a reminder to myself.
  • librarysteg
    librarysteg Posts: 29 Member
    CipherZero wrote: »
    To be completely self-serving, I've written a blog post on MFP about exactly this on Monday.

    The tl;dr is "I'm not there yet" with accepting how I look now isn't how I looked then.

    I'd love to read your post on this...sent you a friend request.
  • RaeImani33
    RaeImani33 Posts: 4 Member
    I'm still getting used to the new me...it's been 2 years now and a total of 50 lbs lost.
  • middlehaitch
    middlehaitch Posts: 8,486 Member
    Librarysteg, similar thing happened to me going into the rec centre the other night. I saw my picture on my swipe card that was take when I first started my weight loss journey 30lb ago. I asked about replacing it with the new me, then decided not to as it was a good little reminder of what I didn't want to look like.
    Company photo; I think I would ask for a retake.
    Cheers, h.
  • joepage612
    joepage612 Posts: 179 Member
    my goal was only 30 pounds and i felt NEW for a brief period but then i forgot about my weight loss until the other day when i happened to look at my ID card and was shocked about how bloated my face used to be. It made me remember and it made me feel glad about my new self.
  • zichab
    zichab Posts: 1,494 Member
    Oh my gosh OP, yes! My husband and I were looking at pictures the other day for our Christmas card and as we were looking, we came across one and I said, "Who is that?" My husband looked at me like I was a few bricks short of a load and said, "It's YOU!" I was flabbergasted because the woman in that picture was NOT me-at least not the me I have seen for the last 20 years! This also happened this summer when I walked by a store window and saw the reflection of a woman wearing MY CLOTHES! It took quite a few seconds to realize it was ME! I have only been obese for the last 20 years, ( I quit smoking, hit menopause and started college-not a good recipe for maintaining weight! :noway: ) but truthfully, I do not remember me as I look and feel now. I am still not used to it, but I love having my energy back. Now that I DO remember! :laugh:

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