I REALLY need help!

Hi. I have pretty much the same stats as you right now (except an inch shorter and I just reached 225 from 260). If you'd like, I'd love to add you as a friend to motivate each other.

As for measuring cheese/other food, you should look into a food scale. That way you can weigh the cheese and take the guess work out of it.

Buy a food scale, and make it your goal to weigh and log everything. Don't even worry about weighing yourself right now, or meeting your calorie goal, just make a commitment to log accurately for one week. I found this really helpful when I started losing motivation. Then you can look at your log and figure out what changes you can realistically make to start meeting your goals. Good luck! x

Hailzorz wrote: »

Hi there!
I'm 19, 5'5", and 224lbs. I feel incredibly uncomfortable with my weight and general appearance and I want to change. I've been using fitnesspal for over two years now and before, I was losing weight at a steady pace and feeling a lot better about myself, but I ended up gaining everything back plus a lot more after my depression started up again. I have an EXTREMELY hard time actually putting the accurate amount of food I eat down. Like I don't really know how to measure cheese right, and I sometimes completely skip days of tracking. I'm so unmotivated but I really just want to lose weight. I'm going to visit my boyfriend in California in March and want to be at least 20 lbs lighter. If anyone can help me with motivation, some tips, idek whatever you think will be helpful would be fantastic!
I honestly don't think I've ever needed more help to get motivated than I do now.

So on the one hand you tell us:

1. You are unhappy with your weight.
2. You need/want to lose weight because of visiting your bf.
3. You have depression.

The answer lies in you losing weight?

But you are unmotivated to sort it out? Surely the motivation lies in the above reasons, but you just dont feel strong enough or have enough confidence that you can do anything? If you were motivated you would do something about it. The motivation has to come from you. the best plan/advice in the world will make no difference unless you commit to making change.

You do that by learning and following the good advice in the stickies and on these forums from people who have been there and done it. Knowledge is your friend.

The basics are easy, just be at a deficit every day by consuming less than you burn. The caeat is that you need to eat a healthy amount of calories and diet for nutritional reasons. To know whether you are at a deficit or not then you need to know what and how much you are consuming.

You say

You find it difficult to record information. Your body knows what youve eaten- All you are doing here by not recording the information is being in denial or lazt to the extent you are undermining having an accurate record which is the key to knowing whether you are at a deficcit or not.

You cant use scales properly. No idea whats so hard about measuring on a scale?

Imo you either want to lose weight or you do not. If you want to lose weight then you do the things needed i.e be able to manage your deficit consistently and that requires you to be midnful of how much you are consuming. These forums are chock full of information in how to get started and the basic steps needed. Follow the basic plan and you will lose weight. If you fail to eat at a deficit you will not lose weight. That is your choice.

If you cant/ wont calorie count then you might want to consider the 5:2 or paleo diet, which you may find easier to manage. My concern would be that you are not organised o focused enough to be able to stick to a plan, in which case you need to take very small steps and introduce yourself to dieting gradually and in ways you can manage.

You could lose 20lbs by March but that would take a lot of work and commitment. You have to ask yourself whether you are serious and you want/ will take the measures needed to get there. That would be 1000 calories less per day from now till then. It is a challneging traget and maybe you would be better off just by teaching yourself about nutrition, learning how to log and understanding what exercise might help rather than being so ambitious. Start small , build on it and have realistic expectations. Good luck and if you wnat to diet then do it properly i.e effectively.

Always down for new friends to motivate and to be motivated by

999tigger wrote: »

So on the one hand you tell us:

1. You are unhappy with your weight.
2. You need/want to lose weight because of visiting your bf.
3. You have depression.

The answer lies in you losing weight?

But you are unmotivated to sort it out? Surely the motivation lies in the above reasons, but you just dont feel strong enough or have enough confidence that you can do anything? If you were motivated you would do something about it. The motivation has to come from you. the best plan/advice in the world will make no difference unless you commit to making change.

You do that by learning and following the good advice in the stickies and on these forums from people who have been there and done it. Knowledge is your friend.

The basics are easy, just be at a deficit every day by consuming less than you burn. The caeat is that you need to eat a healthy amount of calories and diet for nutritional reasons. To know whether you are at a deficit or not then you need to know what and how much you are consuming.

You say

You find it difficult to record information. Your body knows what youve eaten- All you are doing here by not recording the information is being in denial or lazt to the extent you are undermining having an accurate record which is the key to knowing whether you are at a deficcit or not.

You cant use scales properly. No idea whats so hard about measuring on a scale?

Imo you either want to lose weight or you do not. If you want to lose weight then you do the things needed i.e be able to manage your deficit consistently and that requires you to be midnful of how much you are consuming. These forums are chock full of information in how to get started and the basic steps needed. Follow the basic plan and you will lose weight. If you fail to eat at a deficit you will not lose weight. That is your choice.

If you cant/ wont calorie count then you might want to consider the 5:2 or paleo diet, which you may find easier to manage. My concern would be that you are not organised o focused enough to be able to stick to a plan, in which case you need to take very small steps and introduce yourself to dieting gradually and in ways you can manage.

You could lose 20lbs by March but that would take a lot of work and commitment. You have to ask yourself whether you are serious and you want/ will take the measures needed to get there. That would be 1000 calories less per day from now till then. It is a challneging traget and maybe you would be better off just by teaching yourself about nutrition, learning how to log and understanding what exercise might help rather than being so ambitious. Start small , build on it and have realistic expectations. Good luck and if you wnat to diet then do it properly i.e effectively.

Perfectly stated.

Hi! Congratulations on finding this site. It has helped many people reach their goals through real advice, motivation, and sometimes some tough love.

Definitely get a food scale. That's the only way you will ever knew the proper amount to eat, and how much you're really consuming. It can seem daunting at first, but the learning curve is short.

But also, it's time to change your mind set. Stop making your health optional. Stop letting it be debatable, like whether or not you feel like Chinese tonight. Start making it an automatic given, like brushing your teeth. You don't debate each night whether you feel like brushing your teeth, do you? Treat logging food and exercise the same way. They're not optional.

Good luck!

The way I think about it is I've made a deal with myself

If... I don't lie to myself by skipping logging or logging inaccurately so I can try escape the guilt from over-indulging

and in return... I don't guilt trip myself for the occasions I exceed my calorie goal

Life happens, live it and enjoy yourself - you don't have to be perfect, just make sure you have more good days than bad and week to week keep it going in the right direction. Making good choices becomes a habit, even a preference and success and the reward of good results make it easier and easier to keep it going over time.

Just be honest with yourself - it's basically what MFP and logging is based on - information is power - the power to manage your health and lose excess weight.

Sometimes a weight loss journey takes a serious dose of reality…before I changed my lifestyle I went between yoyo diets…my boyfriend was stationed overseas & anytime he would visit or I would visit I would starve myself and work my *kitten* off, then as soon as we were separated again I would gain the weight back. When I finally decided enough was enough it was because I knew I deserved to be the best version of myself. I didn't want to do it for anyone but me. I saw pictures of myself and didn't even see myself. I felt like I was hidden behind the weight I had gained. That's all it took.

Think about what you deserve, how you deserve to feel! You deserve to be the best possible version of yourself…once you realize that the rest will come.

Oh, and a food scale…mine gets more use than anything else. Just make logging and measuring your priority…some days you will have to force yourself to do it, and if you slip up just pick yourself up and do better the next day. You deserve this!

I may have missed it, but are you getting help for your depression? I'd start there if you aren't. If you are having frequent relapses of MDD episodes and are getting treatment, be straightforward with your doctor about it.

Right now, I'm doing my best to eat between a deficit and maintenance. On days I'm not all that hungry, I eat at a deficit. On days that I need or want more, I eat up to maintenance. On days that I overeat, I try to pay closer attention for the next few days. Every so often, during periods of greater motivation, I pay more attention and purposely strive for the deficit. During more stressed periods, I assume I'll be eating closer to maintenance.

So basically, try calculating your 2lb a week number and your maintenance number. You can eat anywhere in that range and not gain. The days you eat at a 2lb a week deficit will probably be much fewer than somewhere in the midrange, and that's good. You don't want to burn yourself out. I personally don't ever hit the 2 lb numbers, I just have it set that way so I don't get complacent (which I do easily and end up eating at maintenance.)