I can't do this anymore

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city_southernbelle
city_southernbelle Posts: 57
edited December 2014 in Motivation and Support
I feel like giving up. Lately I have back sliding a lot and barely making my deficit goals and today was the worse because I didn't workout and this was the last day for the gym to be open until after New year's day. So now I have to solely focus on my caloric intake which has been hard as of late because I have been the same weight for the past 3 weeks and its frustrating because up until today I was working out faithfully and keeping my caloric intake down as much as possible. Feeling like a failure...
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Replies

  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
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    You can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.

    Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.
  • city_southernbelle
    city_southernbelle Posts: 57
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    tomatoey wrote: »
    You can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.

    Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.

    Thanks and I would take a break and try to just maintain but I did horrible during Thanksgiving and trying to make up for it. But as you can see I am failing miserably.

  • PearlAng
    PearlAng Posts: 681 Member
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    tomatoey wrote: »
    You can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.

    Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.
    ^This. You have to try to make this a lifestyle, so its okay if it doesn't work right away; I'm confident that you can do this, and you will find what works for you
  • mathandcats
    mathandcats Posts: 786 Member
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    Maybe you need to set a more moderate calorie deficit goal. If you're feeling deprived, that can make it much harder to stick to it. It's better to lose slower and have a plan you can stick to than to want to give up.

    Also, don't stress out about being at the same weight for 3 weeks! I didn't lose anything for about 3.5 weeks in November, but it has balanced out - if I look at the last 2 months, the average rate of loss is about what I expect.
  • blossomingbutterfly
    blossomingbutterfly Posts: 743 Member
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    You CAN do this is you WANT to do this and you put in the EFFORT to do this. Sure, it's hard, there's days where it defeats us and we want to give up. You can power through it if you want to. You have the ability to do it.

    As for the gym being closed - you don't NEED the gym to exercise if you want to exercise. You can use youtube videos, or any videos, to follow a workout and burn calories. I use FitnessBlender for kettlebell and kickboxing workouts. You can get exercise in. You can walk or run or job outside. You can get it in.

    I'm sorry you're feeling like a failure. However, I will say, you are only a failure if you give up. You haven't given up - you are trying to hold on. That's why you posted here - for support. You CAN do this.
  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
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    Can you go for a walk or hike, or do a video (youtube, fitnessblender) at home?
  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
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    city_southernbelle wrote: »
    tomatoey wrote: »
    You can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.

    Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.

    Thanks and I would take a break and try to just maintain but I did horrible during Thanksgiving and trying to make up for it. But as you can see I am failing miserably.

    Everyone who does Thanksgiving ate at Thanksgiving :)

    People can help troubleshoot your diet, just in case something's up there. Or it might just be a little stall. As long as you're counting, have set an appropriate calorie target, and work at it more days than not, the weight will eventually come off.
  • city_southernbelle
    city_southernbelle Posts: 57
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    PearlAng wrote: »
    tomatoey wrote: »
    You can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.

    Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.
    ^This. You have to try to make this a lifestyle, so its okay if it doesn't work right away; I'm confident that you can do this, and you will find what works for you

    Thanks and yeah it is and I don't want to go back to where I was but it's just so freaking frustrating at times. But I guess I just have to keep pushing because at least I'm not where I started.

    barneygood wrote: »
    Maybe you need to set a more moderate calorie deficit goal. If you're feeling deprived, that can make it much harder to stick to it. It's better to lose slower and have a plan you can stick to than to want to give up.

    Also, don't stress out about being at the same weight for 3 weeks! I didn't lose anything for about 3.5 weeks in November, but it has balanced out - if I look at the last 2 months, the average rate of loss is about what I expect.

    I would change it but I am going to be sedentary for basically the next two weeks so I don't think I can up it anymore than I've already have. Currently eating 1700.

    But yea you're right...I just probably need to stop weighing myself so much...thinking about taking a few weeks off from weighing myself and maybe that will help.

  • city_southernbelle
    city_southernbelle Posts: 57
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    extremelygrumpycat wrote: »
    You CAN do this is you WANT to do this and you put in the EFFORT to do this. Sure, it's hard, there's days where it defeats us and we want to give up. You can power through it if you want to. You have the ability to do it.

    As for the gym being closed - you don't NEED the gym to exercise if you want to exercise. You can use youtube videos, or any videos, to follow a workout and burn calories. I use FitnessBlender for kettlebell and kickboxing workouts. You can get exercise in. You can walk or run or job outside. You can get it in.

    I'm sorry you're feeling like a failure. However, I will say, you are only a failure if you give up. You haven't given up - you are trying to hold on. That's why you posted here - for support. You CAN do this.


    Thanks I really appreciate the support and I guess I can do the P90x vids I have downloaded on my computer but they're just so hard at times and I feel like I'm hardly doing anything. I like running and walking on track or treadmill better but it's going to be raining everyday starting tom until Wednesday...just my luck so P90x it is I guess.

    But yeah I'm going to keep pushing despite the way I feel right now. I've lost too much to turn back now.

    tomatoey wrote: »
    city_southernbelle wrote: »
    tomatoey wrote: »
    You can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.

    Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.

    Thanks and I would take a break and try to just maintain but I did horrible during Thanksgiving and trying to make up for it. But as you can see I am failing miserably.

    Everyone who does Thanksgiving ate at Thanksgiving :)

    People can help troubleshoot your diet, just in case something's up there. Or it might just be a little stall. As long as you're counting, have set an appropriate calorie target, and work at it more days than not, the weight will eventually come off.


    Lol yeah but I ate Thanksgiving for three days straight and they were heavy meals.

    I think it might just be a stall. For the most part I cook my lean meat and veggies for dinner small starch and lunch is usually a salad or sandwich and fruit. I usually don't go over 1500 cals but today I probably went over 2300 cals.
  • Lasmartchika
    Lasmartchika Posts: 3,440 Member
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    barneygood wrote: »
    Maybe you need to set a more moderate calorie deficit goal. If you're feeling deprived, that can make it much harder to stick to it. It's better to lose slower and have a plan you can stick to than to want to give up.

    Also, don't stress out about being at the same weight for 3 weeks! I didn't lose anything for about 3.5 weeks in November, but it has balanced out - if I look at the last 2 months, the average rate of loss is about what I expect.

    This is good advice. For now I've set my weight loss goal at .5 lb/week. I have more calories to eat, yet I can still lose something in the meantime.

    Also, I follow along to Zumba videos and Pilates videos on YouTube. You can do this. Don't give up!! :flowerforyou:
  • tomatoey
    tomatoey Posts: 5,446 Member
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    city_southernbelle wrote: »
    extremelygrumpycat wrote: »
    You CAN do this is you WANT to do this and you put in the EFFORT to do this. Sure, it's hard, there's days where it defeats us and we want to give up. You can power through it if you want to. You have the ability to do it.

    As for the gym being closed - you don't NEED the gym to exercise if you want to exercise. You can use youtube videos, or any videos, to follow a workout and burn calories. I use FitnessBlender for kettlebell and kickboxing workouts. You can get exercise in. You can walk or run or job outside. You can get it in.

    I'm sorry you're feeling like a failure. However, I will say, you are only a failure if you give up. You haven't given up - you are trying to hold on. That's why you posted here - for support. You CAN do this.


    Thanks I really appreciate the support and I guess I can do the P90x vids I have downloaded on my computer but they're just so hard at times and I feel like I'm hardly doing anything. I like running and walking on track or treadmill better but it's going to be raining everyday starting tom until Wednesday...just my luck so P90x it is I guess.

    But yeah I'm going to keep pushing despite the way I feel right now. I've lost too much to turn back now.

    tomatoey wrote: »
    city_southernbelle wrote: »
    tomatoey wrote: »
    You can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.

    Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.

    Thanks and I would take a break and try to just maintain but I did horrible during Thanksgiving and trying to make up for it. But as you can see I am failing miserably.

    Everyone who does Thanksgiving ate at Thanksgiving :)

    People can help troubleshoot your diet, just in case something's up there. Or it might just be a little stall. As long as you're counting, have set an appropriate calorie target, and work at it more days than not, the weight will eventually come off.


    Lol yeah but I ate Thanksgiving for three days straight and they were heavy meals.

    I think it might just be a stall. For the most part I cook my lean meat and veggies for dinner small starch and lunch is usually a salad or sandwich and fruit. I usually don't go over 1500 cals but today I probably went over 2300 cals.

    It's ok, I know it feels bad, like you've disappointed yourself, but it happens. And it doesn't make a dent, as long as you get back to it sooner than later. I had a few days like that - weeks, even! - and I still lost 50 lbs. People even plan these breaks :)

    You'll be fine :)
  • middlehaitch
    middlehaitch Posts: 8,484 Member
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    Do nerdfitness.com every other day until the gym reopens, and eat at maintenance.
    This will give you some recovery time without being completely idle.

    Enjoy the holidays and start fresh in the new year.
    Cheers, h.
  • amusedmonkey
    amusedmonkey Posts: 10,330 Member
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    When you burn out, you can always take a maintenance break. It's a great exercise for when you reach your goal weight and need to maintain. At one point I maintained for 5 months. For the past month I have maintained as well and planning to stay at maintenance till mid January. I promise you, when you are ready you get back into it with vengeance. I have lost 100 pounds so far, so I know this works. It's very important to still count calories when at maintenance, and if you don't want to, it's important to weigh yourself every day to make sure your weight is not creeping back.
  • ovinas1
    ovinas1 Posts: 413 Member
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    If you think you will fail then you will fail...If you think you will succeed then you will succeed. Weak mind weak body. Its that easy..
  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
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    Is your pity-party finished yet?

    What can't you do? You can't weigh your food and log it, you can't make choices that mean you can eat higher volumes or snacks? You can't take your *kitten* out for a walk?

    I think you can

    You just need to commit to yourself

    Nobody promised you an easy ride...fix your mindset, commit to yourself and your goals and get on and do what you need to do because feeling sorry for yourself won't do you any good at all

    Losing weight is hard. Being overweight is hard. Pick your hard!
  • NowyTends
    NowyTends Posts: 110 Member
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    Agree with both Ovinas1 & Rabbitjb. If you want motivation to keep going, just think of how down you will feel a few months from now after you have quit. No "cheer up" or Sympathy hugs will help here.. just a good ole "Get back on track dammit.. now!"
  • chadya07
    chadya07 Posts: 627 Member
    edited December 2014
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    one of my worst enemies in the past was all or nothing mentality. one of the things that has helped me succeed this time to a large extent has been letting go of all or nothing. and when i am tired of it intead of saying "you know what, i dont care anymore i am gonna do what i want" i say... i can take a little break from taking myself too seriously, be rational, and not worry for a few days this week, etc, and it doesnt mean i quit. i dont have to be perfect all the time. i mean... it will take me at LEAST another year to reach my goal. its been almost a year already.... i cant even imagine 2 years of total perfection. i can imagine though, how crappy i would feel if i gave up and went back to the lifestyle i had before...

    not saying just go crazy... but sometimes you will be all in and sometimes you wont.
  • SuequehannaWakiya
    SuequehannaWakiya Posts: 10 Member
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    Well here's a hug. Some good advice has been given but I'm a fan of being kind to yourself. Look over your achievements and be proud of any success you have had. Pick a date in a week or two and recommit xx
  • caratayloruk
    caratayloruk Posts: 58 Member
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    Its a tough time of year but try and take each day at a time. You say your gym is closed until the New Year, so go out for a walk/run. It all helps

    Log your food everyday, sure accept that you'll go over (I've gone over pretty much every day this week) but logging makes sure that I can see why and also may mean I make better choices. Even if you maintain over the holidays then that's still a success, think about how much you would have put on in the past by eating everything in sight?

    Feel free to add me. I'll support and be logging in everyday (and probably telling everyone how much I went over each day!!)
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
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    Go to maintenance if its that bad, but you really just seem to be having a small mental stall. Figue out how you are going to get through the next few weeks. Its not really the gym. Use fitness blender or go for a walk each and every day for 30 mins -1hr.

    You need to start being smarter and avoid talking yourself into defeat. So what if the gym closes (get some internet videos or just walk) so what if you havent lost for 3 weeks (you are on a project thats going to last 18 months) dont let your mind talk yourself out of it.

    Accepts the season is here and then either do exercise or take a break at maintenance or more, but know in your own mind you will resume and that if you break it will be becayse you have enough confidence that you will restart in january and that you want to get slim enough to not be deterred by negative thoughts. Just focus and know how to manage yourself, then it will be fine.

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