I can't do this anymore
city_southernbelle
Posts: 57
I feel like giving up. Lately I have back sliding a lot and barely making my deficit goals and today was the worse because I didn't workout and this was the last day for the gym to be open until after New year's day. So now I have to solely focus on my caloric intake which has been hard as of late because I have been the same weight for the past 3 weeks and its frustrating because up until today I was working out faithfully and keeping my caloric intake down as much as possible. Feeling like a failure...
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You can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.
Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.0 -
You can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.
Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.
Thanks and I would take a break and try to just maintain but I did horrible during Thanksgiving and trying to make up for it. But as you can see I am failing miserably.
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^This. You have to try to make this a lifestyle, so its okay if it doesn't work right away; I'm confident that you can do this, and you will find what works for youYou can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.
Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.
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Maybe you need to set a more moderate calorie deficit goal. If you're feeling deprived, that can make it much harder to stick to it. It's better to lose slower and have a plan you can stick to than to want to give up.
Also, don't stress out about being at the same weight for 3 weeks! I didn't lose anything for about 3.5 weeks in November, but it has balanced out - if I look at the last 2 months, the average rate of loss is about what I expect.0 -
You CAN do this is you WANT to do this and you put in the EFFORT to do this. Sure, it's hard, there's days where it defeats us and we want to give up. You can power through it if you want to. You have the ability to do it.
As for the gym being closed - you don't NEED the gym to exercise if you want to exercise. You can use youtube videos, or any videos, to follow a workout and burn calories. I use FitnessBlender for kettlebell and kickboxing workouts. You can get exercise in. You can walk or run or job outside. You can get it in.
I'm sorry you're feeling like a failure. However, I will say, you are only a failure if you give up. You haven't given up - you are trying to hold on. That's why you posted here - for support. You CAN do this.0 -
Can you go for a walk or hike, or do a video (youtube, fitnessblender) at home?0
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city_southernbelle wrote: »You can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.
Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.
Thanks and I would take a break and try to just maintain but I did horrible during Thanksgiving and trying to make up for it. But as you can see I am failing miserably.
Everyone who does Thanksgiving ate at Thanksgiving
People can help troubleshoot your diet, just in case something's up there. Or it might just be a little stall. As long as you're counting, have set an appropriate calorie target, and work at it more days than not, the weight will eventually come off.0 -
^This. You have to try to make this a lifestyle, so its okay if it doesn't work right away; I'm confident that you can do this, and you will find what works for youYou can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.
Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.
Thanks and yeah it is and I don't want to go back to where I was but it's just so freaking frustrating at times. But I guess I just have to keep pushing because at least I'm not where I started.barneygood wrote: »Maybe you need to set a more moderate calorie deficit goal. If you're feeling deprived, that can make it much harder to stick to it. It's better to lose slower and have a plan you can stick to than to want to give up.
Also, don't stress out about being at the same weight for 3 weeks! I didn't lose anything for about 3.5 weeks in November, but it has balanced out - if I look at the last 2 months, the average rate of loss is about what I expect.
I would change it but I am going to be sedentary for basically the next two weeks so I don't think I can up it anymore than I've already have. Currently eating 1700.
But yea you're right...I just probably need to stop weighing myself so much...thinking about taking a few weeks off from weighing myself and maybe that will help.
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extremelygrumpycat wrote: »You CAN do this is you WANT to do this and you put in the EFFORT to do this. Sure, it's hard, there's days where it defeats us and we want to give up. You can power through it if you want to. You have the ability to do it.
As for the gym being closed - you don't NEED the gym to exercise if you want to exercise. You can use youtube videos, or any videos, to follow a workout and burn calories. I use FitnessBlender for kettlebell and kickboxing workouts. You can get exercise in. You can walk or run or job outside. You can get it in.
I'm sorry you're feeling like a failure. However, I will say, you are only a failure if you give up. You haven't given up - you are trying to hold on. That's why you posted here - for support. You CAN do this.
Thanks I really appreciate the support and I guess I can do the P90x vids I have downloaded on my computer but they're just so hard at times and I feel like I'm hardly doing anything. I like running and walking on track or treadmill better but it's going to be raining everyday starting tom until Wednesday...just my luck so P90x it is I guess.
But yeah I'm going to keep pushing despite the way I feel right now. I've lost too much to turn back now.city_southernbelle wrote: »You can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.
Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.
Thanks and I would take a break and try to just maintain but I did horrible during Thanksgiving and trying to make up for it. But as you can see I am failing miserably.
Everyone who does Thanksgiving ate at Thanksgiving
People can help troubleshoot your diet, just in case something's up there. Or it might just be a little stall. As long as you're counting, have set an appropriate calorie target, and work at it more days than not, the weight will eventually come off.
Lol yeah but I ate Thanksgiving for three days straight and they were heavy meals.
I think it might just be a stall. For the most part I cook my lean meat and veggies for dinner small starch and lunch is usually a salad or sandwich and fruit. I usually don't go over 1500 cals but today I probably went over 2300 cals.0 -
barneygood wrote: »Maybe you need to set a more moderate calorie deficit goal. If you're feeling deprived, that can make it much harder to stick to it. It's better to lose slower and have a plan you can stick to than to want to give up.
Also, don't stress out about being at the same weight for 3 weeks! I didn't lose anything for about 3.5 weeks in November, but it has balanced out - if I look at the last 2 months, the average rate of loss is about what I expect.
This is good advice. For now I've set my weight loss goal at .5 lb/week. I have more calories to eat, yet I can still lose something in the meantime.
Also, I follow along to Zumba videos and Pilates videos on YouTube. You can do this. Don't give up!! :flowerforyou:0 -
city_southernbelle wrote: »extremelygrumpycat wrote: »You CAN do this is you WANT to do this and you put in the EFFORT to do this. Sure, it's hard, there's days where it defeats us and we want to give up. You can power through it if you want to. You have the ability to do it.
As for the gym being closed - you don't NEED the gym to exercise if you want to exercise. You can use youtube videos, or any videos, to follow a workout and burn calories. I use FitnessBlender for kettlebell and kickboxing workouts. You can get exercise in. You can walk or run or job outside. You can get it in.
I'm sorry you're feeling like a failure. However, I will say, you are only a failure if you give up. You haven't given up - you are trying to hold on. That's why you posted here - for support. You CAN do this.
Thanks I really appreciate the support and I guess I can do the P90x vids I have downloaded on my computer but they're just so hard at times and I feel like I'm hardly doing anything. I like running and walking on track or treadmill better but it's going to be raining everyday starting tom until Wednesday...just my luck so P90x it is I guess.
But yeah I'm going to keep pushing despite the way I feel right now. I've lost too much to turn back now.city_southernbelle wrote: »You can do it. Or, maybe "this" needs to be tweaked a little to make it more feasible.
Nothing wrong with a break now and then, either.
Thanks and I would take a break and try to just maintain but I did horrible during Thanksgiving and trying to make up for it. But as you can see I am failing miserably.
Everyone who does Thanksgiving ate at Thanksgiving
People can help troubleshoot your diet, just in case something's up there. Or it might just be a little stall. As long as you're counting, have set an appropriate calorie target, and work at it more days than not, the weight will eventually come off.
Lol yeah but I ate Thanksgiving for three days straight and they were heavy meals.
I think it might just be a stall. For the most part I cook my lean meat and veggies for dinner small starch and lunch is usually a salad or sandwich and fruit. I usually don't go over 1500 cals but today I probably went over 2300 cals.
It's ok, I know it feels bad, like you've disappointed yourself, but it happens. And it doesn't make a dent, as long as you get back to it sooner than later. I had a few days like that - weeks, even! - and I still lost 50 lbs. People even plan these breaks
You'll be fine 0 -
Do nerdfitness.com every other day until the gym reopens, and eat at maintenance.
This will give you some recovery time without being completely idle.
Enjoy the holidays and start fresh in the new year.
Cheers, h.0 -
When you burn out, you can always take a maintenance break. It's a great exercise for when you reach your goal weight and need to maintain. At one point I maintained for 5 months. For the past month I have maintained as well and planning to stay at maintenance till mid January. I promise you, when you are ready you get back into it with vengeance. I have lost 100 pounds so far, so I know this works. It's very important to still count calories when at maintenance, and if you don't want to, it's important to weigh yourself every day to make sure your weight is not creeping back.0
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If you think you will fail then you will fail...If you think you will succeed then you will succeed. Weak mind weak body. Its that easy..0
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Is your pity-party finished yet?
What can't you do? You can't weigh your food and log it, you can't make choices that mean you can eat higher volumes or snacks? You can't take your *kitten* out for a walk?
I think you can
You just need to commit to yourself
Nobody promised you an easy ride...fix your mindset, commit to yourself and your goals and get on and do what you need to do because feeling sorry for yourself won't do you any good at all
Losing weight is hard. Being overweight is hard. Pick your hard!-2 -
Agree with both Ovinas1 & Rabbitjb. If you want motivation to keep going, just think of how down you will feel a few months from now after you have quit. No "cheer up" or Sympathy hugs will help here.. just a good ole "Get back on track dammit.. now!"0
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one of my worst enemies in the past was all or nothing mentality. one of the things that has helped me succeed this time to a large extent has been letting go of all or nothing. and when i am tired of it intead of saying "you know what, i dont care anymore i am gonna do what i want" i say... i can take a little break from taking myself too seriously, be rational, and not worry for a few days this week, etc, and it doesnt mean i quit. i dont have to be perfect all the time. i mean... it will take me at LEAST another year to reach my goal. its been almost a year already.... i cant even imagine 2 years of total perfection. i can imagine though, how crappy i would feel if i gave up and went back to the lifestyle i had before...
not saying just go crazy... but sometimes you will be all in and sometimes you wont.0 -
Well here's a hug. Some good advice has been given but I'm a fan of being kind to yourself. Look over your achievements and be proud of any success you have had. Pick a date in a week or two and recommit xx0
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Its a tough time of year but try and take each day at a time. You say your gym is closed until the New Year, so go out for a walk/run. It all helps
Log your food everyday, sure accept that you'll go over (I've gone over pretty much every day this week) but logging makes sure that I can see why and also may mean I make better choices. Even if you maintain over the holidays then that's still a success, think about how much you would have put on in the past by eating everything in sight?
Feel free to add me. I'll support and be logging in everyday (and probably telling everyone how much I went over each day!!)0 -
Go to maintenance if its that bad, but you really just seem to be having a small mental stall. Figue out how you are going to get through the next few weeks. Its not really the gym. Use fitness blender or go for a walk each and every day for 30 mins -1hr.
You need to start being smarter and avoid talking yourself into defeat. So what if the gym closes (get some internet videos or just walk) so what if you havent lost for 3 weeks (you are on a project thats going to last 18 months) dont let your mind talk yourself out of it.
Accepts the season is here and then either do exercise or take a break at maintenance or more, but know in your own mind you will resume and that if you break it will be becayse you have enough confidence that you will restart in january and that you want to get slim enough to not be deterred by negative thoughts. Just focus and know how to manage yourself, then it will be fine.0 -
A hug from me too.
I agree with seeing the gym-closure period as an opportunity to try some different exercises - youtube videos, walking challenge, that kind of thing.0 -
Do the best you can everyday - that's all you can do. There are exercise routine's on Youtube you can follow along to while not having a gym.0
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If you "messed" up today, that's why there's always a tomorrow to make up for it. There will always be a new day for you to change your lifestyle and keep moving forward towards your goals. Take it day by day, because you won't see results overnight. I know how you feel, because I've given up a LOT when I was just starting to lose weight. I used to make excuses and postponed my 'diet' and working out. But I had to learn to get back up and start all over again. To be honest, it's 80% of what you eat, 20% of exercise and 100000% motivation that keeps us going towards our fitness journey. You can do it! Just get your butt off that chair and start slowly. Maybe eat a bit less during dinner and go for a 15 minute walk. It's the little things that create the big changes. Good luck! If you need anyone to talk to, I'm here. :-)0
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city_southernbelle wrote: »I feel like giving up. Lately I have back sliding a lot and barely making my deficit goals and today was the worse because I didn't workout and this was the last day for the gym to be open until after New year's day. So now I have to solely focus on my caloric intake which has been hard as of late because I have been the same weight for the past 3 weeks and its frustrating because up until today I was working out faithfully and keeping my caloric intake down as much as possible. Feeling like a failure...
Every day is a new day. Stop dwelling on what you ate yesterday or at Thanksgiving. Do what you need to do for today. Plan for tomorrow.
Maybe it is time to work on your mental flexibility. When you have a problem, brainstorm at least 5 possible solutions. Think about what the potential positive and negative results of each would be. Try the one you think will have the best result.
Problem: The gym is closed.
Possible Solutions: 1) take a break from exercise and just log food and watch calories, 2) put on weather-appropriate clothing and exercise outside rain or shine, 3) exercise at home or work- you tube videos, apps, dvd's, climbing stairs, walking indoors, dancing, 4) invest in home gym equipment- if it is something you use a lot at the gym maybe it would be worth it to own it, 5) don't exercise or watch calories at all until after the holidays
Potential results:
1) still lose weight or at least not gain, a bit more restrictive calories, might miss doing physical activity
2) still moving, eat more calories, get fresh air, be seen as tough and dedicated
3) lots of free stuff, learn that you don't need a gym all the time, exercise any time of day or night, try new things, spend less time commuting to gym, less restrictive calories
4) might be costly at first, might take up space, would be convenient, exercise any time, no waiting for or sharing equipment, spend less time commuting to use gym equipment, less restrictive calories
5) no restrictions, might gain some weight, might be depressing, might be harder to restart, realize it isn't the end of the world if your weight goes up a few pounds but re-dedicate yourself to sticking to your plan, decide you don't want to lose weight enough to make the effort at this point
Something like that.
Practice doing this with problems in your life and see that you almost always have more options and choices.0 -
If you "messed" up today, that's why there's always a tomorrow to make up for it. There will always be a new day for you to change your lifestyle and keep moving forward towards your goals. Take it day by day, because you won't see results overnight. I know how you feel, because I've given up a LOT when I was just starting to lose weight. I used to make excuses and postponed my 'diet' and working out. But I had to learn to get back up and start all over again. To be honest, it's 80% of what you eat, 20% of exercise and 100000% motivation that keeps us going towards our fitness journey. You can do it! Just get your butt off that chair and start slowly. Maybe eat a bit less during dinner and go for a 15 minute walk. It's the little things that create the big changes. Good luck! If you need anyone to talk to, I'm here. :-)
Thanks I really really needed that! And will do!0 -
city_southernbelle wrote: »I feel like giving up. Lately I have back sliding a lot and barely making my deficit goals and today was the worse because I didn't workout and this was the last day for the gym to be open until after New year's day. So now I have to solely focus on my caloric intake which has been hard as of late because I have been the same weight for the past 3 weeks and its frustrating because up until today I was working out faithfully and keeping my caloric intake down as much as possible. Feeling like a failure...
Every day is a new day. Stop dwelling on what you ate yesterday or at Thanksgiving. Do what you need to do for today. Plan for tomorrow.
Maybe it is time to work on your mental flexibility. When you have a problem, brainstorm at least 5 possible solutions. Think about what the potential positive and negative results of each would be. Try the one you think will have the best result.
Problem: The gym is closed.
Possible Solutions: 1) take a break from exercise and just log food and watch calories, 2) put on weather-appropriate clothing and exercise outside rain or shine, 3) exercise at home or work- you tube videos, apps, dvd's, climbing stairs, walking indoors, dancing, 4) invest in home gym equipment- if it is something you use a lot at the gym maybe it would be worth it to own it, 5) don't exercise or watch calories at all until after the holidays
Potential results:
1) still lose weight or at least not gain, a bit more restrictive calories, might miss doing physical activity
2) still moving, eat more calories, get fresh air, be seen as tough and dedicated
3) lots of free stuff, learn that you don't need a gym all the time, exercise any time of day or night, try new things, spend less time commuting to gym, less restrictive calories
4) might be costly at first, might take up space, would be convenient, exercise any time, no waiting for or sharing equipment, spend less time commuting to use gym equipment, less restrictive calories
5) no restrictions, might gain some weight, might be depressing, might be harder to restart, realize it isn't the end of the world if your weight goes up a few pounds but re-dedicate yourself to sticking to your plan, decide you don't want to lose weight enough to make the effort at this point
Something like that.
Practice doing this with problems in your life and see that you almost always have more options and choices.
Wow that's really great advice and you are so right. I guess I just need to breathe, stop focusing so much on my weight and more on my mental capacity because it really is mind over matter and you helped me remember that.0 -
Do or do not. There is no try.0
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Is your pity-party finished yet?
What can't you do? You can't weigh your food and log it, you can't make choices that mean you can eat higher volumes or snacks? You can't take your *kitten* out for a walk?
I think you can
You just need to commit to yourself
Nobody promised you an easy ride...fix your mindset, commit to yourself and your goals and get on and do what you need to do because feeling sorry for yourself won't do you any good at all
Losing weight is hard. Being overweight is hard. Pick your hard!
Seriously?? Someone flagged this... Geez, flag-happy people! Rabbit, you nailed it. We all need these words from time to time. Get up and get over your excuses.-1 -
You're one quarter of the way to your goal weight............why in the world give up now, to go back to square one?
Eat at maintenance through the rest of the year and then BOOM, get back to your deficit and the gym. Oh and take a few walks or do some calisthenics at home to keep your body moving in the meantime.
We all have difficult days but the idea is to stick to it no matter what! No one said it would be easy and it won't be, but the closer you get to your goal, the more fun you will have!0 -
Every day is a new day. Stop dwelling on what you ate yesterday or at Thanksgiving. Do what you need to do for today. Plan for tomorrow.
Maybe it is time to work on your mental flexibility. When you have a problem, brainstorm at least 5 possible solutions. Think about what the potential positive and negative results of each would be. Try the one you think will have the best result.
Problem: The gym is closed.
Possible Solutions: 1) take a break from exercise and just log food and watch calories, 2) put on weather-appropriate clothing and exercise outside rain or shine, 3) exercise at home or work- you tube videos, apps, dvd's, climbing stairs, walking indoors, dancing, 4) invest in home gym equipment- if it is something you use a lot at the gym maybe it would be worth it to own it, 5) don't exercise or watch calories at all until after the holidays
Potential results:
1) still lose weight or at least not gain, a bit more restrictive calories, might miss doing physical activity
2) still moving, eat more calories, get fresh air, be seen as tough and dedicated
3) lots of free stuff, learn that you don't need a gym all the time, exercise any time of day or night, try new things, spend less time commuting to gym, less restrictive calories
4) might be costly at first, might take up space, would be convenient, exercise any time, no waiting for or sharing equipment, spend less time commuting to use gym equipment, less restrictive calories
5) no restrictions, might gain some weight, might be depressing, might be harder to restart, realize it isn't the end of the world if your weight goes up a few pounds but re-dedicate yourself to sticking to your plan, decide you don't want to lose weight enough to make the effort at this point
Something like that.
Practice doing this with problems in your life and see that you almost always have more options and choices.[/quote]
Great advice!!!0
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