How to stop binge eating and find motivation from within? Really lost...
RidrxX122
Posts: 7 Member
I was doing really well for a long time and lost 30 pounds. I just finished my first semester of college, so I have been living alone for the first time in my life and I have issues with that. I don't do so well when alone. So, I lost motivation and stopped caring, but I really do still care. Basically it goes like this: no motivation when I wake up, so I don't exercise. Then when I do eat, I don't stop eating. While I eat, I tell myself I don't care, but as soon as I finish eating and realize what just happened, I hate myself immediately..I cant even get through 1 day without doing this. And if I do end up exercising and feeling great, by the end of the day I go to bed telling myself I will do the same thing tomorrow. But then I wake up and don't have the motivation. I want this experience to be fun and enlightening, not have it feel like a chore. The career path I chose involves being physically fit. I just have to get to that point. I know this is just the beginning, but I am majorly struggling here. My problem is I am a team player. I always have been. I do fantastically when part of a team like in volleyball. I have always found motivation through other things. I need to learn to find motivation from within myself, but I don't know how or where to start. Any advice is appreciated, but please be gentle as I am being really honest, more honest than I ever have been about this..thank you for reading this rant..
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Replies
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Take it from a 60 year old woman-remember, some of us get wiser as we grow older!
Don't wait for motivation-just get yourself to do the stuff you KNOW you need to do to get to yourself to your goal!
Many people here get up and do it! They don't necessarily love it all the time-but that's just part of being a grown-up.
As you do it and see results-that's your reward!
Read all the helpful stickies.
DON'T restrict your calories too much or you WILL binge!
DON'T restrict your treats too much or again, you WILL binge!
Love yourself and be kind to yourself and forgive yourself the inevitable overeating and binges.
If you binge-DON'T quit!!! The most successful people don't quit in the face of a slip-up!
As you carry on, you will feel so good about yourself; it's a very joyful process!
You can do it!
JUST START (and don't give up), you need AND deserve it!0 -
Like you said you are a team player and coming from another extrovert here - getting up early in the morning to go workout by myself NEVER sounds fun and probably 8 times out of 10 it won't happen. I'm %1000 like you how if I don't wake up first thing in the morning I eat- won't stop eating and feel like crap. If I wake up and work out I feel sooo much better physically and almost always have an awesome day with my food. So here is what I've been doing and what has always worked for me- FIND someone to work out with!!!!!!!!!! Seriously I promise you- pick someone who you respect and who in close or better shape than you and met at the gym with them 3-5 times a week!!!
Seriously....it's really NOT a motivation issue, it's just how you are wired and you work out better when there are other people there with you, motivating you, challenging you, and just making it that much more fun!!
So for the past 9 days I have been extremely determined to loose this weight for good and really ramp up my fitness level. My workout friend who has been working out hardcore with me for the last year (she is a similar build, height, weight than me and just as competitive so we REALLY pushed each other during workouts) isn't able to workout with the same intensity for about another 9 months so I've been struggling to, as you say, find motivation for my workouts at the gym.
Also, I'm a runner and that's something that I absolutely love so I'm always motivated to run outside, but now that it's winter and getting darker earlier even that makes it hard.
So what I did is found a local gym that teaches difficult to advanced classes and signed up for that for the next three months and am gonna go to those!! I bet in your area there might be something like that for you- if anything just to meet people!
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You are a college student, right? Are you ALWAYS motivated to go to class, to read the material, to study for exams? Probably not, but you do anyways because you know the consequences of not going to class and studying. You do it anyways.
Apply that behavior to diet and exercise. You won't always be motivated, but do it anyways, because you are aware of the consequences (both good and bad) of your actions.
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This happened to me back in 2012. I lost 30 pounds. I felt great but then I got a job. I started back up on unhealthy habits. How? I am not sure. It took 2-3 months to lose weight, you'd think that my new lifestyle became a habit but, no. So here I am 2 years giving it a go. This is try # 330. Lol, I may be exaggerating a bit. But I can definitely relate. Everyday became a "new" day. Every meal I ate I said that I didn't care then after I felt like crap and hated myself. But aren't you tired of being tired (this is what I ask myself)? I am. I am tired of feeling like crap everyday of my damn life. Feeling like a failure because food became a friend(enemy, my fault) instead of fuel. Going home and sleeping 1-3 hours (my version of a short nap) on my days off, when my house needed cleaning, when I needed to do homework and I HAD bad grades (because I let my body control me instead of me controlling it), when my son wanted attention and I just lied there (thinking he was just being annoying while mommy was napping). Come on, seriously, WE ARE MISSING OUT ON LIFE because we choose our "easy" bad habits over change.
This is honesty at its greatest. Feel free to add me because I am not about any bs anymore I will motivate you & me to get up because today I am changing my life and helping you change yours!0 -
Thank you everyone for the very inspirational and different perspectives. This made a huge difference in my mindset and now im ready to do this again and stick with it. Your intellectual responses are exactly what I needed. Thank you0
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Sorry, a little late to the party. Here's what I blogged about binge eating as it comes up so often.
http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/jgnatca/view/halting-a-binge-session-715131
But your challenge seems a little more complex. Like how you get yourself to do things you don't particularly enjoy, or aren't structured in the way you like.
I am kind of like your sixty year old contributor. I'm in my fifties and I work with my temperament instead of against it. I geek out, so I have at least six apps on my phone to track my progress. My iPhone addiction is way off the map, but hey, it works for me.
Is there any way you can turn your eating and fitness plan in to a team activity?
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I am kind of like your sixty year old contributor. I'm in my fifties and I work with my temperament instead of against it. I geek out, so I have at least six apps on my phone to track my progress. My iPhone addiction is way off the map, but hey, it works for me.
Is there any way you can turn your eating and fitness plan in to a team activity?
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In the past, the more ways I could see progress happening the better and more excited I felt. Thanks for reminding me about that option.
Also, I am getting a puppy in January to be my companion and running partner when old enough. I know that will spike my motivation. She will be my athletic partner all the way. Also, for class we work out together as a class so that will help too. Just about 3 weeks til class starts. Once I start riding I know I will be okay. I just know I will regret not doing everything I can to get back into shape before that.
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Those are all great ideas. I just started adding exercise to my life routine this year and I must say, it is addicting. But some exercises work and others don't. Team activities DO NOT motivate me. But having a target like a run to prepare for, is highly motivating. So progress tracking to a specific goal might help.0
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I feel yah. Right now I'm so unmotivated and I may be slightly depressed. I'd rather go home and lay on the couch, which then leads to me going to bed at 7pm and sleeping until 7am. Not good. Unmotivated to clean, do laundry, go to the gym, get groceries....it's just not a good place for me to be and I recognize that....it's just pulling my life back on track. I'm going to take a few things that I read here and apply it next week when I start back on a 12 week workout and eating plan.0
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I used to be depressed and would sleep for about 14 hours a day. Its hard to pull yourself back up but it is possible. I wish you luck on your 12 week plan!alisonmarie85 wrote: »I feel yah. Right now I'm so unmotivated and I may be slightly depressed. I'd rather go home and lay on the couch, which then leads to me going to bed at 7pm and sleeping until 7am. Not good. Unmotivated to clean, do laundry, go to the gym, get groceries....it's just not a good place for me to be and I recognize that....it's just pulling my life back on track. I'm going to take a few things that I read here and apply it next week when I start back on a 12 week workout and eating plan.
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It may help you to plan out your meals in advance and even get them ready for the most part if possible and don't deviate from your plan. This may help you feel in control of your food. I often eat a small breakfast then log my food for the entire day right after logging breakfast. Good luck!0
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Lots of good advice here. I will just add this... When I first started MFP, somebody posted "I am not motivated, but I AM resolved," which really inspired me... and little and by little I changed it to "Being resolved finally made me motivated!" Good luck!0
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I was doing really well for a long time and lost 30 pounds. I just finished my first semester of college, so I have been living alone for the first time in my life and I have issues with that. I don't do so well when alone. So, I lost motivation and stopped caring, but I really do still care. Basically it goes like this: no motivation when I wake up, so I don't exercise. Then when I do eat, I don't stop eating. While I eat, I tell myself I don't care, but as soon as I finish eating and realize what just happened, I hate myself immediately..I cant even get through 1 day without doing this. And if I do end up exercising and feeling great, by the end of the day I go to bed telling myself I will do the same thing tomorrow. But then I wake up and don't have the motivation. I want this experience to be fun and enlightening, not have it feel like a chore. The career path I chose involves being physically fit. I just have to get to that point. I know this is just the beginning, but I am majorly struggling here. My problem is I am a team player. I always have been. I do fantastically when part of a team like in volleyball. I have always found motivation through other things. I need to learn to find motivation from within myself, but I don't know how or where to start. Any advice is appreciated, but please be gentle as I am being really honest, more honest than I ever have been about this..thank you for reading this rant..
Find a workout buddy to exercise in the morning.0 -
Hi
The best place to begin is at the beginning.
All you have to do is lose 1 pound 18 times. Not 18 pounds, all at once.
That kick to get it done comes from inside....
The fact you are reaching out and being honest about your struggle is a sign of growth and progress, for which you should be commended. Take comfort in that.
The difference between MFP and everything else? If you adopt the mindset that its a lifestyle change & not a diet, the rest will fall into place.
The past is done. The future will be here soon enough. Try and focus on today & today only. Its all we have to work with.
6.5 months ago, I weighed 312 pounds. I woulda been dead in 5 years if I hadn't made this commitment. All signs were pointing that way.
Just a few things the MFP tribe and common sense has taught me:
1) This is a thing you DO, not a definition of who you ARE. Just like laundry. Take the emotion out of it wherever possible. I cannot stress this enough.
2) My approach? This is a lifestyle change, not a diet. So there is no finite number of days that I am trying to get to. I will be logging in and logging food for the rest of my life, because:
a) This program works
b) I don't want to die young and I was headed that direction
3) Try to remember - We are the results of the choices we make every day, whether those choices are good or bad. Make as many good choices as you can, and the ship will stay steady. At the end of the day, we are the man in the mirror. We are accountable to ourselves and no one else. We can help you with getting there, but the doing is up to you. Leave rationalizing at the door, and continue to be honest with yourself. Its the only path to long term success
Cal tracking is considered a good choice (whether boring or not) because it tells you where you really are (just like your check register tells you your balance) - remember to be honest with yourself all the time. Ultimately, you will achieve that which you are seeking much sooner.
Knowing that plus the support I get from my MFP buds make enough difference that Ive lost 52 in 228 days without doing anything stupid. You just find what works and then hammer the crap out of it, staying in the present while doing so.
If you will stay committed to this, your MFP tribe will commit to helping. Why? Because that's what we do. And we have ALL been there.
You only get one chance to live your life.
FR on the way.
Fsunami0 -
I joined the MYAC group on here (move your *kitten* challenge). You can record your miles walked every day. It is not a competition, the only person you have to beat is yourself. I started out doing about 50 miles a month and now because of this group I find myself walking 200 miles per month. I found it really motivating. Have a look at it and pledge some miles for the month then get on and do them. If you find you are walking or running or cycling more than you pledged you can up your miles at any time. I have found this a real motivator. Good luck0
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Could you post the link to the MYAC group please 2essie? Cant find groups so easily since MFP "improved" things.0
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it's not so easy to accept it but you are addicted to that feeling of eating and "over-eating" the mentality you have now is what is causing you to go through the endless cycle and all you need to do is give your mindset a little boost, yes--sounds real cliché but its the only way for you to get out of this hump, i have them all the time but when you do, it will feel great to be addicted to now being healthy
Here's what you do:
set an alarm in the morning to wake you up at an ungodly hour to go to the gym, I usually settle on around 4am. if you hit snooze the first day, fine. be proud of yourself that you AT LEAST opened your eyes at 4am in the morning feel good about yourself. snooze again on the second day sit up at the end of your bed, if you lay back down and sleep, fine. atleast you got up this time. third day it should feel a little easier to get up and go to the bathroom wash your face etc. go back to bed? fine. fourth day it should be easier to do just a little bit more because if you do just one more thing every time, you are programming your brain and you are letting it know that you can do this. and little by little and sooner than later you will program it to get yourself up completely get dressed (or sleep in your gym clothes) and get yourself to the gym! each day is a little progress and even the smallest progress can turn into a little motivation. like i said you will ultimately feel addicted to those habits because they are more rewarding than sleeping
hope this helps good luck with everything!0 -
thank you everyone! I will be taking all of your advice into consideration0
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You're prioritizing other things that really do need to be prioritized, like your coursework. And by the way, the first year of college is hard on a lot of people, there's a lot of adjusting to do. I think you're a normal human with only so much headspace and energy.
So, yeah, motivation won't be enough, because we've all got a finite amount of that, and right now yours is going to other things that are very important!
So the way to deal with it is to make this process not rely on motivation, like others have said. Plan your meals, make food prep efficient, and mostly get rid of any "bad" foods you have around, just for now, so that you have no choice but to eat healthily in reasonable amounts, and you're not tempted.
Like, I don't have much discipline or whatever, so I try to lighten the load on myself by not having foods I could eat nonstop in the house. It's just way easier that way. I still have sweets and things, they're just not within arm's reach. I make myself leave the house to get those, in single servings, at e.g. a coffee shop. That way, I'm not denying myself all foods outright, but when I do decide to have a brownie or whatever, it's more conscious than automatic.
Good luck!0
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