this may sound crazy but just stick with me for a moment...

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CoralMoon
CoralMoon Posts: 26 Member
in Motivation and Support
So as a person with an eating disorder, my weight has fluctuated my whole life because of my anxiety and obsession with the numbers... I get depressed when I eat, I get depressed when I dont eat. I get depressed if I dont eat enough, I get depressed if I eat just enough....I am depressed if I am not worn out from a work out...I am depressed all the time because I am upset with the way I look.
I have bounced back and forth between a fluctuation of 130-160 lbs for nearly my whole life.

now..heres the crazy part...The other day I bought a corset.
Now before you say anything, no im not doing the "corset diet"
But since I am most uncomfortable with how I look in my clothes, I feel that my wearing a corset will actually help me get over my anxiety with numbers, because I wont see my stomach expanding when I eat, and I will feel fuller faster, helping me with portion sizes instead of just eating number based. things and obsessing over them so much, and since I wont see my "meal puge" that shows up by the end of the day after I eat whatever it is i eat. I have noticed im always happier in the morning cause its when im "thinnest" looking and by the end of the day I feel worse....

So i am hoping it will help me get over the emotional aspect attached to eating for me, and I can stop obsessing over the numbers in my head and the voices because I will still look smaller...and it could be a good step toward recovery for me.

I guess I just wanted to talk about it...

Replies

  • GaleHawkins
    GaleHawkins Posts: 8,160 Member
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    CoralMoon I wish you the best even though I do not understand your eating disorder. My eating disorder is carb abuse. I did finally tell myself that Sugar is poisonous so I would not crave it and it actually worked quite well. :)

    A lot of people do find self talk helpful about many issues in life. If just talking about something on your mind helps so be it. I do that a lot myself. I think by talking and I learn by reading but that is just me.

    I know sugar is not a poison per se but it does a number on my body as if it was toxic to my body. :(
  • CoralMoon
    CoralMoon Posts: 26 Member
    edited December 2014
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    GaleHawkins wrote: »
    CoralMoon I wish you the best even though I do not understand your eating disorder. My eating disorder is carb abuse. I did finally tell myself that Sugar is poisonous so I would not crave it and it actually worked quite well. :)

    A lot of people do find self talk helpful about many issues in life. If just talking about something on your mind helps so be it. I do that a lot myself. I think by talking and I learn by reading but that is just me.

    I know sugar is not a poison per se but it does a number on my body as if it was toxic to my body. :(

    i have EDNOS so i have days/weeks/ext of binge/purge and starvation alternately, So im trying to use this site to help me lose weight the right way and help me get over it because im tired of it....[
  • brianpperkins
    brianpperkins Posts: 6,124 Member
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    This site is not a replacement for a professional therapist that specializes in the treatment of eating disorders.
  • Atrocity108
    Atrocity108 Posts: 328 Member
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    CoralMoon wrote: »
    So as a person with an eating disorder, my weight has fluctuated my whole life because of my anxiety and obsession with the numbers... I get depressed when I eat, I get depressed when I dont eat. I get depressed if I dont eat enough, I get depressed if I eat just enough....I am depressed if I am not worn out from a work out...I am depressed all the time because I am upset with the way I look.
    I have bounced back and forth between a fluctuation of 130-160 lbs for nearly my whole life.

    now..heres the crazy part...The other day I bought a corset.
    Now before you say anything, no im not doing the "corset diet"
    But since I am most uncomfortable with how I look in my clothes, I feel that my wearing a corset will actually help me get over my anxiety with numbers, because I wont see my stomach expanding when I eat, and I will feel fuller faster, helping me with portion sizes instead of just eating number based. things and obsessing over them so much, and since I wont see my "meal puge" that shows up by the end of the day after I eat whatever it is i eat. I have noticed im always happier in the morning cause its when im "thinnest" looking and by the end of the day I feel worse....

    So i am hoping it will help me get over the emotional aspect attached to eating for me, and I can stop obsessing over the numbers in my head and the voices because I will still look smaller...and it could be a good step toward recovery for me.

    I guess I just wanted to talk about it...

    Do you find it hard to breathe and move when wearing this corset?

  • ninerbuff
    ninerbuff Posts: 48,509 Member
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    It's still an issue with body dysmorphia because you aren't going to get over the anxiety and only temper it with a corset on. If you're not see a professional or specialist in ED then it's time you should.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png
  • CoralMoon
    CoralMoon Posts: 26 Member
    edited December 2014
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    ninerbuff wrote: »
    It's still an issue with body dysmorphia because you aren't going to get over the anxiety and only temper it with a corset on. If you're not see a professional or specialist in ED then it's time you should.

    A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
    IDEA Fitness member
    Kickboxing Certified Instructor
    Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
    9285851.png
    brianpperkins wrote: »
    This site is not a replacement for a professional therapist that specializes in the treatment of eating disorders.

    I am already in therapy.......im using this site to help me keep track of what i should be eating so that im healthy......
  • CoralMoon
    CoralMoon Posts: 26 Member
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    Atrocity108 wrote: »
    CoralMoon wrote: »

    Do you find it hard to breathe and move when wearing this corset?

    No. Its not that hard actually I can do pretty much anything enyone else can do. it doesnt bother me much at all.
  • JayRuby84
    JayRuby84 Posts: 557 Member
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    Hope you can get control of the ED thoughts. The prison your brain has put you in is a really sad lonely place. Be careful with this site. For some it can become another toxic place. Do your therapists recommend you use this or no?
  • Tblackdogs
    Tblackdogs Posts: 324 Member
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    It's good that you're in therapy because from your original post, it is obvious that while you may in fact have an eating disorder, you also suffer from depression and probably body dysmorphia. Please be kind to yourself and continue to get help. Wishing you the best of luck!
  • CoralMoon
    CoralMoon Posts: 26 Member
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    JayRuby84 wrote: »
    Hope you can get control of the ED thoughts. The prison your brain has put you in is a really sad lonely place. Be careful with this site. For some it can become another toxic place. Do your therapists recommend you use this or no?

    I told them I was using it to help me take in the right number of calories per day.....so they know about it and they think its okay as long as I am using it to help me stay healthy and stop being so horrible about my habits.
  • CoralMoon
    CoralMoon Posts: 26 Member
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    Tblackdogs wrote: »
    It's good that you're in therapy because from your original post, it is obvious that while you may in fact have an eating disorder, you also suffer from depression and probably body dysmorphia. Please be kind to yourself and continue to get help. Wishing you the best of luck!

    thank you. Im trying...It is easier now since I can get it right at my college and for free, so it makes it easier since I am at the school all the time anyway.
  • brianpperkins
    brianpperkins Posts: 6,124 Member
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    CoralMoon wrote: »
    JayRuby84 wrote: »
    Hope you can get control of the ED thoughts. The prison your brain has put you in is a really sad lonely place. Be careful with this site. For some it can become another toxic place. Do your therapists recommend you use this or no?

    I told them I was using it to help me take in the right number of calories per day.....so they know about it and they think its okay as long as I am using it to help me stay healthy and stop being so horrible about my habits.

    There is a major difference in using this site to track caloric intake and to justify ED provoked behaviors.
  • CoralMoon
    CoralMoon Posts: 26 Member
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    brianpperkins wrote: »
    CoralMoon wrote: »
    JayRuby84 wrote: »
    Hope you can get control of the ED thoughts. The prison your brain has put you in is a really sad lonely place. Be careful with this site. For some it can become another toxic place. Do your therapists recommend you use this or no?

    I told them I was using it to help me take in the right number of calories per day.....so they know about it and they think its okay as long as I am using it to help me stay healthy and stop being so horrible about my habits.

    There is a major difference in using this site to track caloric intake and to justify ED provoked behaviors.

    Im not using it to justify them though....Im using this to help me track my calories so I know I am actually eating enough and it helps me be less anxious about how much I have eaten....
  • LAMCDylan
    LAMCDylan Posts: 1,215 Member
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    I can understand why people can have EDs. But you really need to believe and understand that you are more than just what shows on the outside. You need to develop an attitude to not give a damn what others think. Because this is what starts the dysfunctional thinking for ED sufferers. If you believe you are beautiful and worthy then no ones' opinion can change that. And you are beautiful. Like I said, you are more than what shows on the outside. Your beliefs, personality, spirituality etc is all a part of you. What is on the inside is most important, trust me. I am fat right now, but I still love and care about myself. And if anyone has a problem with how I look I don't let it bother me. Because I know my worth is beyond my physical appearance and I define my own worth. I had to learn to be like this. You have to also. Learn to accept yourself no matter what. Don't pay attention so much to what a scale says. As long as you look and feel good that is all that matters. I am pretty sure you are probably at a reasonable weight. Start working on the inside and not so much on the outside. Good luck
  • jodster1504
    jodster1504 Posts: 23
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    Hey girl, I completely understand how you feel, also dealing with the same kind of eating disorder. It's great that you are seeing someone about it. Will the corset help? It can't hurt I guess (as long as it's not too tight!!). I've noticed that if I wear tighter, high waisted jeans I will eat less. But what's stopping you from just taking it off..? Unfortunately, little tricks don't heal EDs and you gotta keep working on what is really at the source of the problem :)
  • brianpperkins
    brianpperkins Posts: 6,124 Member
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    CoralMoon wrote: »
    brianpperkins wrote: »
    CoralMoon wrote: »
    JayRuby84 wrote: »
    Hope you can get control of the ED thoughts. The prison your brain has put you in is a really sad lonely place. Be careful with this site. For some it can become another toxic place. Do your therapists recommend you use this or no?

    I told them I was using it to help me take in the right number of calories per day.....so they know about it and they think its okay as long as I am using it to help me stay healthy and stop being so horrible about my habits.

    There is a major difference in using this site to track caloric intake and to justify ED provoked behaviors.

    Im not using it to justify them though....Im using this to help me track my calories so I know I am actually eating enough and it helps me be less anxious about how much I have eaten....

    This thread is all about a corset ... not use of the food database. Your disordered thinking is quite obvious, even when you try to deflect.
  • CoralMoon
    CoralMoon Posts: 26 Member
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    LAMCDylan wrote: »
    I can understand why people can have EDs. But you really need to believe and understand that you are more than just what shows on the outside. You need to develop an attitude to not give a damn what others think. Because this is what starts the dysfunctional thinking for ED sufferers. If you believe you are beautiful and worthy then no ones' opinion can change that. And you are beautiful. Like I said, you are more than what shows on the outside. Your beliefs, personality, spirituality etc is all a part of you. What is on the inside is most important, trust me. I am fat right now, but I still love and care about myself. And if anyone has a problem with how I look I don't let it bother me. Because I know my worth is beyond my physical appearance and I define my own worth. I had to learn to be like this. You have to also. Learn to accept yourself no matter what. Don't pay attention so much to what a scale says. As long as you look and feel good that is all that matters. I am pretty sure you are probably at a reasonable weight. Start working on the inside and not so much on the outside. Good luck

    thank you
  • CoralMoon
    CoralMoon Posts: 26 Member
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    jodster1504 wrote: »
    Hey girl, I completely understand how you feel, also dealing with the same kind of eating disorder. It's great that you are seeing someone about it. Will the corset help? It can't hurt I guess (as long as it's not too tight!!). I've noticed that if I wear tighter, high waisted jeans I will eat less. But what's stopping you from just taking it off..? Unfortunately, little tricks don't heal EDs and you gotta keep working on what is really at the source of the problem :)

    Yeah I know, but I am thinking if I do wear it i will focus less on the way I look so I can sort of break the bad habits. I am thinking if I feel a little bit better about the way I look I can stop obsessing about it so much. Im getting a lot of mixed help right now...some people are nice and others are just kind of brushing me off like I dont make sense so I am glad someone kind of gets it, you know?

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