1 month into this...

meganokamoto
meganokamoto Posts: 13 Member
edited November 9 in Health and Weight Loss
Starting Weight: 306lbs
Goal Weight: 200lbs
Current weight: 296lbs
I know my goal weight will still make me obese but that is my first goal. Once I reach it, I will readjust.

I am a 24 year old woman and only 1 month into my weight loss journey. I have lost about 10lbs. I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) and also have bi-polar disorder, PTSD, and generalized anxiety disorder as well as chronic migraines; I am currently unmedicated.

I started off so strong - cutting soda and sweets down and then out of my diet, eating appropriate portions and being very calorie conscious, logging religiously... The last week has been very hard for me though. It's not even the holiday food that is making it hard - it's the mental disorders. I have been stricken so hard with my anxiety that it has been nearly impossible to keep up the work that goes into this journey. It's hard to care about how I shouldn't have that cookie or how big my portion of rice is when I can barely bring myself to get out of bed in the morning. I have had a headache/migraine pretty consistently for ~8 days now. I want to do this so badly - to be healthier, look healthier - but at the same time I just want to give up right now.

Has anyone else had to battle with their body chemistry and mental disorders (depression, bi-polar, anxiety, ptsd, pcos, etc.) while dieting? What helped you stay on track and not give up?

If anyone has any positive feedback, tips, or stories of their own experiences... I'd love to hear and talk. Thanks, guys!
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Replies

  • WithWhatsLeft
    WithWhatsLeft Posts: 196 Member
    I don't have any advice for you as I haven't been in your particular shoes, but my other half is fighting some battles of his own while trying to get healthy, so I have an idea of how hard it is.

    I just wanted to say, congratulations on the 10lbs down - that could not have been easy to do, but you did it. That's a big deal!
  • summergirl212
    summergirl212 Posts: 91 Member
    10 pounds is a great loss in a month, especially with the holidays! I would say keep focusing on your goal and celebrating the small things. Try to get some rest and take care of yourself, that is the most important thing. If you don't have a perfect eating day, that's okay, don't beat yourself up, there's always tomorrow.

    Keep up the great work!
  • Phrick
    Phrick Posts: 2,765 Member
    Why are you unmedicated, if I may ask? I also have bipolar and anxiety disorders and keeping my moods in order has been one of the biggest helps on this weight loss adventure because as you pointed out it's very hard to give a damn when you're constantly overwhelmed in the grip of anxiety or depression. I'd address that first if it were up to me. Getting the anxiety, depression and migraines under control will go a long way toward putting you in a much better mindset to achieve your weight loss goals.
  • lil_lizt
    lil_lizt Posts: 275 Member
    Starting Weight: 306lbs
    Goal Weight: 200lbs
    Current weight: 296lbs
    I know my goal weight will still make me obese but that is my first goal. Once I reach it, I will readjust.

    I am a 24 year old woman and only 1 month into my weight loss journey. I have lost about 10lbs. I have Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) and also have bi-polar disorder, PTSD, and generalized anxiety disorder as well as chronic migraines; I am currently unmedicated.

    I started off so strong - cutting soda and sweets down and then out of my diet, eating appropriate portions and being very calorie conscious, logging religiously... The last week has been very hard for me though. It's not even the holiday food that is making it hard - it's the mental disorders. I have been stricken so hard with my anxiety that it has been nearly impossible to keep up the work that goes into this journey. It's hard to care about how I shouldn't have that cookie or how big my portion of rice is when I can barely bring myself to get out of bed in the morning. I have had a headache/migraine pretty consistently for ~8 days now. I want to do this so badly - to be healthier, look healthier - but at the same time I just want to give up right now.

    Has anyone else had to battle with their body chemistry and mental disorders (depression, bi-polar, anxiety, ptsd, pcos, etc.) while dieting? What helped you stay on track and not give up?

    If anyone has any positive feedback, tips, or stories of their own experiences... I'd love to hear and talk. Thanks, guys!

    I suffer from BPD, GAD, chronic depression and OCD as well as migraines so I understand where you're coming from. I'm still in the early stages of my weight loss too. In regards to diet, I find it helps to plan my week ahead (although that may be the OCD lol). I can't really offer much more in the way of advice as I'm still learning how to keep on track myself, but you (and anyone else) are welcome to add me for support and understanding from someone else in the same boat
  • holly55555
    holly55555 Posts: 306 Member
    edited January 2015
    I am a generalized anxiety and OCD sufferer and I get migraines too. First of all, at the very least, get migraine medication. Even if it's just as needed, it will make a huge difference to your quality of life. I use Maxalt and it has been a life saver!

    Dieting makes me really anxious and obsessive, especially the counting calorie part. I found that I feel so much better counting by week as opposed to by day. For example, today I can binge out and eat pizza and drink wine (as long as I honestly count my portions) because the rest of the week I will eat healthy and work out, and it will even out in my calories. As long as I keep a "cheat meal" that is budgeted into my calories, I keep losing and it keeps me from stressing out. If I eat unhealthy, I don't feel like I've ruined my diet, I just keep to it the rest of the week.

    That's what is great about counting - as long as you're measuring and being consistent, there is plenty of room to fix mistakes. There is less pressure.

    Good luck to you and remember, the key is consistency!

    Oh and another thing - are you in therapy? I did cognitive behavioral therapy, where they retrain you to break cycles of anxiety. It will keep you from getting stuck in these ruts. Look into it.
  • meganokamoto
    meganokamoto Posts: 13 Member
    I don't have any advice for you as I haven't been in your particular shoes, but my other half is fighting some battles of his own while trying to get healthy, so I have an idea of how hard it is.

    I just wanted to say, congratulations on the 10lbs down - that could not have been easy to do, but you did it. That's a big deal!

    Thank you for your encouragement! I appreciate your reply!
  • meganokamoto
    meganokamoto Posts: 13 Member
    10 pounds is a great loss in a month, especially with the holidays! I would say keep focusing on your goal and celebrating the small things. Try to get some rest and take care of yourself, that is the most important thing. If you don't have a perfect eating day, that's okay, don't beat yourself up, there's always tomorrow.

    Keep up the great work!

    Thank you. I'm trying to keep from beating myself up.. It's just hard when I'm doing so much worse now than I was.
  • obscuremusicreference
    obscuremusicreference Posts: 1,320 Member
    10 pounds in a month is a great loss--keep it up!

    While I don't have specific advice for your disorders, I will say that exercise has made my anxiety better. I mostly work out at home following youtube videos.
  • meganokamoto
    meganokamoto Posts: 13 Member
    Phrick wrote: »
    Why are you unmedicated, if I may ask? I also have bipolar and anxiety disorders and keeping my moods in order has been one of the biggest helps on this weight loss adventure because as you pointed out it's very hard to give a damn when you're constantly overwhelmed in the grip of anxiety or depression. I'd address that first if it were up to me. Getting the anxiety, depression and migraines under control will go a long way toward putting you in a much better mindset to achieve your weight loss goals.

    Unfortunately it's a very slow process to get my mental health taken care of. I have state insurance, so I'm limited on providers that I can see (that is covered by my insurance)... And because so many others are in the same position... I have to schedule my appointment weeks in advance and then deal with my problems myself until I reach my appointment date.
    I'm currently in the middle of trying to deal with my PCOS and have an appointment for dealing with my anxiety that is still a long while out. :/
  • meganokamoto
    meganokamoto Posts: 13 Member
    lil_lizt wrote: »

    I suffer from BPD, GAD, chronic depression and OCD as well as migraines so I understand where you're coming from. I'm still in the early stages of my weight loss too. In regards to diet, I find it helps to plan my week ahead (although that may be the OCD lol). I can't really offer much more in the way of advice as I'm still learning how to keep on track myself, but you (and anyone else) are welcome to add me for support and understanding from someone else in the same boat

    Thank you! I will definitely add you. It will be nice to have a bigger support system. :)
  • lawlifehanna
    lawlifehanna Posts: 90 Member
    Hang in there. Not having those health issues I don't have much advice, except for one thing: if you can, stretch and move your back, neck & shoulders daily to prevent them from becoming overly stiff and causing any more headaches. Congratulations on the 10lbs, that's great!
  • meganokamoto
    meganokamoto Posts: 13 Member
    holly55555 wrote: »
    I am a generalized anxiety and OCD sufferer and I get migraines too. First of all, at the very least, get migraine medication. Even if it's just as needed, it will make a huge difference to your quality of life. I use Maxalt and it has been a life saver!

    Dieting makes me really anxious and obsessive, especially the counting calorie part. I found that I feel so much better counting by week as opposed to by day. For example, today I can binge out and eat pizza and drink wine (as long as I honestly count my portions) because the rest of the week I will eat healthy and work out, and it will even out in my calories. As long as I keep a "cheat meal" that is budgeted into my calories, I keep losing and it keeps me from stressing out. If I eat unhealthy, I don't feel like I've ruined my diet, I just keep to it the rest of the week.

    That's what is great about counting - as long as you're measuring and being consistent, there is plenty of room to fix mistakes. There is less pressure.

    Good luck to you and remember, the key is consistency!

    Oh and another thing - are you in therapy? I did cognitive behavioral therapy, where they retrain you to break cycles of anxiety. It will keep you from getting stuck in these ruts. Look into it.

    Thank you for all of your advice. I have actually been seriously considering CBT to help me with my anxiety. I think that I will inquire about that when my doctor's office opens Monday. Thank you so much!
  • HeidiCooksSupper
    HeidiCooksSupper Posts: 3,839 Member
    I used to have anxiety attacks and have had a diagnosis of clinical depression for over 30 years. Daily medication, psychological counseling, a SADD light in winter, HEALTHY EATING and EXERCISE make keep the anxiety attacks and depression at bay. When I am not doing the healthy eating and exercise, the depression is worse. So, don't consider it a diet to lose weight, consider healthy eating and exercise medicine for your ills! And never, ever think you are alone in your stuggles. As you've seen from the responses, there are LOTS of us here!!
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
    Think you are overcomplicating it.
    • Prelog your food and eat according to the plan. This should ensure consistent deficits= weight loss.
    • Do 30 mins exercise every other day going to every day starting with walking or swimming.
    • Do research on understanding how people lose weight i.e consistent sustainable deficits. Have realistic expectations and make more ood choices than bad ones.
    • Dont beat yourself up. Dont demonise food.

    If you keep it simple, just focus on one day at a time and keep recording deficits then you will lose weight. Dont worry about the rest. Once you start to make progress you will get a sense of achievement which should help make you less anxious and should also reduce some of the migraines if you are also having a healthy balanced diet as well as getting soem exercise.

    Focus on doing the above as consistently as you can.
  • feralkitten1010
    feralkitten1010 Posts: 219 Member
    I second the migraine treatment comment. Generally, I'll take something as soon as I feel the signs of one coming on. Anxiety is an issue that I've learned to talk myself through for most occasions, but cardio has helped immensely with this. Just an easy walk for 20 to 30 minutes can change my mood drastically!! Congratulations on your first ten pounds. That is awesome! :)

    If I may add, perhaps you should allow for a bit of indulgence each day so it becomes one less thing your mind focuses on when you do come into an anxiety attack?
  • jaimekbee1219
    jaimekbee1219 Posts: 96 Member
    Congrats on your ten pounds lost!!!

    I definitely have PCOS and anxiety, and am currently in the process of getting diagnosed with fibromyalgia as the cause of my migraines.

    From what I've read since my diagnosis in 2004, PCOS can cause anxiety and depression. Maybe in taking care of the PCOS, you will alleviate some of the anxiety! All these hormones being off balance are super irritating. I'm currently on birth control for my cycles and planning to start reducing carbs this week (which according to some studies can be helpful for women with PCOS). I've also used the Glycemic Index when I was first diagnosed and that helped me a lot too.

    Someone mentioned meal planning - I've found that to be helpful when I stick to it! I also found that logging my meals for the day keeps me from over eating. If I know how much I'm having for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, I can plan my snacks accordingly. I have long days so snacking is a must!

    There are some great PCOS groups on mfp that are super active and really informative. I don't have information on anything else, though. I'm sure there are groups out there if you look! Feel free to add me if you'd like :)
  • Hi!! I also have BPD GAD and PTSD. I know what it is like to have everyday be a struggle. Though I do not dwell on the things from my past it has changed how I live and breathe everyday. I am unmedicated also as I find it really hard to keep up with it, timing the meds right so that I can function during the day and remember to schedule apts and keep the apts and take time off work and the weight gain and the insurance battles over paying for the meds that actually DONT make me want to kill myself.


    Anywho..... find time for relaxation for the anxiety. Make peace with whatever caused the PTSD (I'm not saying get over it, that will never happen. Just make peace with it.) Come to the realization that life does go on and start living the best life you can. Find a way to love yourself. Avoid stressors. This is huge for me!! If it's people, places, situations find out what makes you anxious and avoid them. Find a support system.

    Exercise helps with depression also.
    Do the best you can do, make small achievable goals and celebrate your accomplishments!!

    Add me and we can do this together :smiley:
  • LiveLoveRunFar
    LiveLoveRunFar Posts: 176 Member
    Good job on the weight loss, you are on the right track. Movement/exercise helps a lot. If I didn't exercise I would not stay on track with eating. When I move it leaves a lasting effect of not needing to eat so much. I started small, 10 minutes twice a day - walking, as I got stronger I did more. My happiness level increased tremendously. When I feel it coming on, I get up and run on the treadmill. One of my MFP friends told me...when you feel like running that's the anxiety/stress coming out...go with it and run it out. Now, I could only do a few seconds of running at first but one bad day I was so anxiety ridden I ran 20 minutes straight and felt elated when done. Have never been able to do THAT again but haven't been as stressed since. Anxiety makes the headaches worse and last longer, but I have fewer since I started a daily movement plan.
  • drabbits3
    drabbits3 Posts: 140 Member
    10 pounds in a month is TERRIFIC! That is a great start! I suffer from anxiety and that alone is a lot to manage, forget all the other stuff you are also dealing with. I agree with everyone that said get on meds. Why suffer if you don't have to?!?! And it is hard to care about pretty much anything when the anxiety is in overdrive. I have found that exercise is key to keeping my worrying to a manageable level. I lost 20 pounds since June 30 and have gained back 5 since November 30 from the combo of holiday eating and not exercising AND I notice a HUGE difference in my anxiety. Not only the extra crap food but the lack of movement. The hardest thing for me was finding exercise that I like enough to keep doing. Turns out I like repetitive, kind of meditative stuff--elliptical, treadmill, walking outside (we live by Lake Michigan, so I can walk the lake trail), and my favorite--swimming. Program your device with Pandora or podcasts or something and let that be your zone out time. The thing I like best about swimming--no one can talk to me. I count laps and it's very meditative--helps with the racing, spinning anxiety brain. Ditto walking outside--even when it's cold, I bundle up and even if I only do 30 minutes-it's better than nothing. I listen to classical music and gregorian chants--again, very calming.
    Good luck! Friend me if you want--you can totally do this!
  • meganokamoto
    meganokamoto Posts: 13 Member
    albalegume wrote: »
    Good job on the weight loss, you are on the right track. Movement/exercise helps a lot. If I didn't exercise I would not stay on track with eating. When I move it leaves a lasting effect of not needing to eat so much. I started small, 10 minutes twice a day - walking, as I got stronger I did more. My happiness level increased tremendously. When I feel it coming on, I get up and run on the treadmill. One of my MFP friends told me...when you feel like running that's the anxiety/stress coming out...go with it and run it out. Now, I could only do a few seconds of running at first but one bad day I was so anxiety ridden I ran 20 minutes straight and felt elated when done. Have never been able to do THAT again but haven't been as stressed since. Anxiety makes the headaches worse and last longer, but I have fewer since I started a daily movement plan.

    That makes total sense. I think I'll be trying to start a movement plan. I have access to a stationary bike... And as much road to walk as I want. Lol. When I get really anxious I not only want to run, I want to hide. And i guess because hiding is easier, I go for that. Thank you for your reply!
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,151 Member
    WTG on your 10 pounds! You just have to take each day as it comes and commit to yourself that you're going to stick with it. Good luck!
  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
    Try yoga breathing -- helps with relaxation and body awareness.

    https://youtube.com/watch?v=Sd94Gh4lKOA&list=PLhiNtEBsgk1SKo-3NnmoWMeu_BkRS_kgw&index=1
  • mforrestall
    mforrestall Posts: 37 Member
    I know exactly where you are coming from. As much as I KNOW exercise will help, it seems literally impossible when I barely have the strength to get out of bed at times. For me I've focused more on the diet side with a goal of exercise 2 times in a week. If I don't want to exercise (for whatever reason) I don't. For me, forcing myself to do something because I "should" just makes me shut down. I have found incredible relief from my chronic headaches and migraines by eating healthier and a medicine that actually works when I have a migraine. What works for me is to spend a day, usually Sunday, prepping some kind of food for lunches during the week and then storing it in individual containers, this eliminates the "what to eat" debate and it's so simple because it's portioned and ready to do. I usually have a smoothie for breakfast which is also fast and easy. Some people can't do it, but by eating mainly the same thing for a week, it helps me create a routine and manage my anxiety. Good luck, you are not alone with your challenges.
  • betstoo
    betstoo Posts: 8 Member
    I have suffered from depression and anxiety for 30 years! I have done the medication route. I am currently med free and have been for four months. I was on effexor for abt five years. It was difficult getting off for me and I am not saying it's for you but exercising helps me. As well as taking folic acid, b12 and Gaba and staying away from sugar. Maybe just adding those vitamins will help.
  • meganokamoto
    meganokamoto Posts: 13 Member
    Congrats on your ten pounds lost!!!

    I definitely have PCOS and anxiety, and am currently in the process of getting diagnosed with fibromyalgia as the cause of my migraines.

    From what I've read since my diagnosis in 2004, PCOS can cause anxiety and depression. Maybe in taking care of the PCOS, you will alleviate some of the anxiety! All these hormones being off balance are super irritating. I'm currently on birth control for my cycles and planning to start reducing carbs this week (which according to some studies can be helpful for women with PCOS). I've also used the Glycemic Index when I was first diagnosed and that helped me a lot too.

    Someone mentioned meal planning - I've found that to be helpful when I stick to it! I also found that logging my meals for the day keeps me from over eating. If I know how much I'm having for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, I can plan my snacks accordingly. I have long days so snacking is a must!

    There are some great PCOS groups on mfp that are super active and really informative. I don't have information on anything else, though. I'm sure there are groups out there if you look! Feel free to add me if you'd like :)

    Thank you for telling me about the PCOS groups! I will definitely be looking into those. I'm also on birth control to regulate my cycles. I just recently started going to a new doctor who is in the process of rediagnosing me with PCOS since I was diagnosed 10+ years ago and she just wants to reconfirm, I guess. I'm awaiting my appointment to find out the results of the ultrasound I recently got.
  • meganokamoto
    meganokamoto Posts: 13 Member
    drabbits3 wrote: »
    10 pounds in a month is TERRIFIC! That is a great start! I suffer from anxiety and that alone is a lot to manage, forget all the other stuff you are also dealing with. I agree with everyone that said get on meds. Why suffer if you don't have to?!?! And it is hard to care about pretty much anything when the anxiety is in overdrive. I have found that exercise is key to keeping my worrying to a manageable level. I lost 20 pounds since June 30 and have gained back 5 since November 30 from the combo of holiday eating and not exercising AND I notice a HUGE difference in my anxiety. Not only the extra crap food but the lack of movement. The hardest thing for me was finding exercise that I like enough to keep doing. Turns out I like repetitive, kind of meditative stuff--elliptical, treadmill, walking outside (we live by Lake Michigan, so I can walk the lake trail), and my favorite--swimming. Program your device with Pandora or podcasts or something and let that be your zone out time. The thing I like best about swimming--no one can talk to me. I count laps and it's very meditative--helps with the racing, spinning anxiety brain. Ditto walking outside--even when it's cold, I bundle up and even if I only do 30 minutes-it's better than nothing. I listen to classical music and gregorian chants--again, very calming.
    Good luck! Friend me if you want--you can totally do this!

    Thank you for the encouragement. I'm definitely going to be looking into the local trails... I live in Washington state and there are plenty of beautiful places to walk. My boyfriend is very supportive and walks with me a lot of the time... I just get tired of the same road, I guess. So I'll have to start looking for ways to mix it up! I also love the repetitive exercises - stationary bike, walking, etc... I would LOVE to have access to a treadmill and elliptical but I don't have the money for a gym membership or to buy the equipment myself, lol.
  • meganokamoto
    meganokamoto Posts: 13 Member
    999tigger wrote: »
    Think you are overcomplicating it.
    • Prelog your food and eat according to the plan. This should ensure consistent deficits= weight loss.
    • Do 30 mins exercise every other day going to every day starting with walking or swimming.
    • Do research on understanding how people lose weight i.e consistent sustainable deficits. Have realistic expectations and make more ood choices than bad ones.
    • Dont beat yourself up. Dont demonise food.

    If you keep it simple, just focus on one day at a time and keep recording deficits then you will lose weight. Dont worry about the rest. Once you start to make progress you will get a sense of achievement which should help make you less anxious and should also reduce some of the migraines if you are also having a healthy balanced diet as well as getting soem exercise.

    Focus on doing the above as consistently as you can.

    Thank you for your input! I started off doing lots of research about losing weight, healthy and cheap recipes, and many other things - I think maybe I'll start doing that again because I think learning new things keeps it interesting - keeps me from feeling stagnant.
  • meganokamoto
    meganokamoto Posts: 13 Member
    RodaRose wrote: »
    Try yoga breathing -- helps with relaxation and body awareness.

    https://youtube.com/watch?v=Sd94Gh4lKOA&list=PLhiNtEBsgk1SKo-3NnmoWMeu_BkRS_kgw&index=1

    I honestly didn't even think of yoga breathing! I'll definitely give it a try. Thank you!
  • jlp419
    jlp419 Posts: 14 Member
    Hi there. I can relate to you. For three years I battled, and still am battling severe anxiety and depression. As a result, I have gained 60 lbs. My current weight is 225.

    To deal with anxiety and depression, my advice is to seek medical help until your body calms. It doesn't have to be permanent. Feeling better mentally is the first step. I think you are tackling too much at one time. Just be sure the side effects are not weight gain on any medications you try. You can have your life back. I am on Cymbalta and feel so much better.

    As far as losing weight, try Intermittent Fasting by Dr. Sara Solomon. Sign up on her website and she will send workouts via email every day. I am on day three.

    I know the feeling of hopelessness, and trust me it will get better. I am here if you need to talk. Lots of ♡ your way!
    Jamie

  • silentKayak
    silentKayak Posts: 658 Member
    I agree that a 10 lb loss is huge. Congratulations!

    Focus on one thing at a time. Your weight isn't always your top priority BUT you should be thinking about small, sustainable changes. Tracking/logging your intake consistently is far more important than whether you're over/under your calories on any given day. Just the process of tracking everything and being more aware of what you're eating and why will help you out.

    One thing that helps me is remembering that being overweight contributes to depression, and depression contributes to being overweight. It's a nasty cycle, but the weight loss (and related behaviors) help to break the cycle.
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