Struggling with mindset- any advice?

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enzosmama
enzosmama Posts: 134 Member
in Motivation and Support
I know this journey for me is 90% about my mindset, if not more. Once I make up my mind and my mind is in the right place the actions will happen without much difficulty.

I am a very analytical person and also a very visual person. I need to understand where I'm going, how I'm going to get there, and what it's going to be like when I'm there. And I know it's impossible to know ALL of this until you're actually reaching milestones on the journey, but for me it would be helpful to have some kind of visualization.

I am struggling because I don't know what it's going to look like when I lose the weight. When I get fit. I don't know what it's going to feel like. I don't know what will be DIFFERENT about my life or how I will be living differently. And I think that's holding me back. Part of it is fear of the unknown, and part of it is being comfortable with the norm (it's safe because it's what I know)

On the surface it may sound completely ridiculous- you may think "Don't worry so much, you will feel GREAT. You will look GREAT. And that's GOOD, so what's the problem?" But that is too vague for me. I have no idea what life will be like for me as I achieve these milestones, reach my goal weight, and maintain my goal weight. I have no idea what the end result will FEEL like and so it's difficult for me to maintain motivation to work for something that is so vague.

Does anyone else struggle with this? It's something I plan on discussing with my therapist, but it's helpful for me to hear from others who are on this journey.

Replies

  • kelleycallen
    kelleycallen Posts: 10
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    I used to feel like that. Start meditation, or visualization. Buy a magazine. Find a girl body you like, of course similiar to your but your goal weight. Cut out her head and just see yourself w this body. Say to yourself over and over again, i am so happy i am skinny. :) look at me. I feel great.

    I do this when I am running on the tredmill. Lol it helps
  • brenn24179
    brenn24179 Posts: 2,144 Member
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    It feels good, don't tug on your clothes or cant wait to get home to get those tight jeans off. You always have something to wear in your closet. But it doesn't mean everything is happy in life but it seems it is easier to endure with the weight off. With me I had more confidence, respected myself more, let people disrespect me a lot less. Changed jobs. The best part for me is knowing when spring comes I can put on my capris, shorts. I use to never be able to find anything to wear. It is a lot of work but must be worth it because a lot of us are trying to maintain it.
  • dasher602014
    dasher602014 Posts: 1,992 Member
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    I would re-read what you have written as your goals and reason to lose weigh. Read every day. Your little guy deserves to have an active, fun-loving, involved mum. Not one who sits by the sidelines, has health problems (they will come if you keep on your current track) and regrets not doing something about her weight earlier in his life.

    You will enjoy his life and your own so much more. As to how you will feel when you get there? I know how I feel when I am not "there" and how I feel when I accomplish something big. And I know which feeling I would rather live with.

    Good luck!
  • Deipneus
    Deipneus Posts: 1,862 Member
    edited January 2015
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    Almost all the advice on weight loss is about physical changes, but everyone I know who has succeeded at this says that it's mostly mental. So, you're on the right track. I think the advice you got regarding visualization makes sense. It didn't keep me from losing weight, but I did find as others have, that once the weight was lost, it was hard to see myself as fit in my mind's eye. It matters because our bodies tend to manifest what our mind envisions. So meditation and visualization. Discussing it with your therapist sounds like an excellent idea. Good luck.
  • nellyett
    nellyett Posts: 436 Member
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    A healthy lifestyle is much more enjoyable for me when I focus on fitness related goals. Set your calorie goal at a moderate deficit from your TDEE and have patience. (info in the link below)

    Download the Couch to 5km - C25K app on your phone and start running :) Trust me, I NEVER thought I could run but this app made it easy and enjoyable. It starts with very short intervals and eases you into progression. I had to repeat a few weeks, but I got there. Whenever I completed a "day" I was so elated and actually clapped for myself!! haha

    Google proper running form to stay injury free.

    Next, and I'd say even more importantly, look into weight lifting. Find a simple progressive program like Stronglifts and get started now! When you see quick results like adding weight to the bar each week and tangible evidence that you are getting stronger and your efforts are yielding results, you will stay motivated guaranteed! PLUS, lifting heavy will give you the curves that most people are looking for. Nothing has made me love my body more than lifting heavy weights for numerous reasons.

    Last, keep it simple! No drastic calorie restrictions, no eliminating food groups, everything in moderation so you don't feel deprived. It really is simple. Some days aren't as easy, but it is simple.

    I wish I'd know all of this in my 20's :) Would have saved me years of yo-yo'ing!

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/topics/show/1080242-a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
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    Can you visualize the things you will be doing? I checked your profile and my condolences for the setbacks. Build up slowly to prevent further injury.

    Here's a picture of one of my new role models:
    Portrait_K.Switzer_hires_photocredit_JoanBarkerImages2011.jpg

    http://kathrineswitzer.com/

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