"You have a really pretty face....."

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bigislandgrrl
bigislandgrrl Posts: 196 Member
in Getting Started
Any of you sick of hearing this? Its totally backhanded but because its a "compliment" we need to be nice about it!?! I'm gonna have a healthy body to go along with my pretty face! Any girls with "pretty faces" looking to lose 80 - 100 + lbs? Wanna be friends?
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  • arditarose
    arditarose Posts: 15,574 Member
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    I got this in high school a lot. I knew it was meant to be a compliment but it's annoying. If you have a pretty face then you're pretty. Period.
  • msplussizebeauty
    msplussizebeauty Posts: 4 Member
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    I get that all the time and it is so annoying! "oh you pretty for a big girl" dang can I just be pretty geez :s
  • jlang143
    jlang143 Posts: 13 Member
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    A guy I liked said that to me once. I can still hear it in my head. UGH! Let's be MFP friends!
  • bulbadoof
    bulbadoof Posts: 1,058 Member
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    i never get why people think "you have a pretty face" is a backhanded compliment. My 110-lb sister gets told she has a pretty face. Unless they specifically say "pretty for a big girl" or something like that that directly comments on weight, I think you could be projecting just a teensy bit.
  • ellisboyd1
    ellisboyd1 Posts: 67 Member
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    They are seeing unfulfilled potential. You can change your body, but the face not so much.

    They should of course say "you're pretty", or just nothing.
  • txteachermom
    txteachermom Posts: 83 Member
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    I am a "pretty face" girl! We can be friends!
  • MoiAussi93
    MoiAussi93 Posts: 1,948 Member
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    I used to hear that on occasion...but only from women. Men would either just say I'm pretty/beautiful or say nothing at all. Some women can be catty!
  • healthyinpink
    healthyinpink Posts: 87 Member
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    Lets be friends! I hear that ALL the time, "but you're so pretty, don't worry yadda yadda" bulls-- lol. I'll send out a few adds too!
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    I don't think that is true, fair or balanced.
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    This breaks my heart.
  • Sued0nim
    Sued0nim Posts: 17,456 Member
    edited January 2015
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    Yeah .. imagine how you'd react to a compliment on your body though .. "Hey you have great curves / tits / *kitten*" :eyeroll:

    so I actually think you have a pretty face is a lovely compliment unless it is followed by 'for a fat girl'

    and tbh weight loss does change faces - quite a lot - eyes, cheeks, chin etc
  • squirrelzzrule22
    squirrelzzrule22 Posts: 640 Member
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    so annoying. no one would tell a thin woman with an unattractive face "oh, but you have such a nice body..." because they would know it doesn't sound like a compliment. same rules should apply!

    people probably intend to be nice when the say it, so try not to let it get to you.
  • msf74
    msf74 Posts: 3,498 Member
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    If someone gives me a compliment I usually accept it in the spirit it was given, even if delivered clumsily or without much thought.

    Most people are well intentioned rather than malicious in my opinion.
  • PurdueBoilerFan
    PurdueBoilerFan Posts: 21
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    Like the above poster, I don't think folks, generally, intend to be mean spirited or rude. They're just thoughtless, or, perhaps, clueless. Nevertheless....I'll always accept a compliment. :)
  • bigislandgrrl
    bigislandgrrl Posts: 196 Member
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    I guess I just don't understand the need to give a "compliment" at all. I mean, by all means tell me that my outfit is awesome, or my boots are bad *kitten* - we could even go so far as to tell me I have gorgeous hair (which of course I do) but why feel the need to compliment anyone on their body parts???
  • RoxieDawn
    RoxieDawn Posts: 15,488 Member
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    I have see some of the most beautiful faces on all shapes and sizes. I never say to someone they have a beautiful face because you are beautiful all over no matter your size!

    It's too bad I don't have a beautiful face and I have a small body!

    No one means to be mean or ill-spirited.. I would kill to have a great face!

  • busseybl
    busseybl Posts: 32 Member
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    Wow! That almost sounds rude to me!
  • yoovie
    yoovie Posts: 17,121 Member
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    bigislandgrrl wrote: »
    I guess I just don't understand the need to give a "compliment" at all. I mean, by all means tell me that my outfit is awesome, or my boots are bad *kitten* - we could even go so far as to tell me I have gorgeous hair (which of course I do) but why feel the need to compliment anyone on their body parts???

    have you ever told a little girl that she had pretty eyes? or a little boy that he had a great smile and laugh?

  • levitateme
    levitateme Posts: 999 Member
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    yoovie wrote: »
    bigislandgrrl wrote: »
    I guess I just don't understand the need to give a "compliment" at all. I mean, by all means tell me that my outfit is awesome, or my boots are bad *kitten* - we could even go so far as to tell me I have gorgeous hair (which of course I do) but why feel the need to compliment anyone on their body parts???

    have you ever told a little girl that she had pretty eyes? or a little boy that he had a great smile and laugh?

    I see your point, but I also so OP's point. Saying "you have such a pretty face" to an overweight woman is basically saying "You have such a pretty face... you should lose weight because you would be 'really' pretty if you weren't so fat."

    I never got the "pretty face" comments, mostly because my face is not attractive at all when I am overweight. If I had though, it would have felt like a backhanded compliment. Any compliment that includes "...but..." is not really a compliment, IMO.

  • AngryViking1970
    AngryViking1970 Posts: 2,847 Member
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    I'm not sure it's the phrase "you have such a pretty face" so much as the tone that's used when someone says it. There's pity in it and that is not in any way complimentary.

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