Lost 30lbs but still the same???

I think any person who has lost a significant amount of weight understands that we often don't see ourselves the way others see us.

To me, I look the exact same no matter how much I weigh. The only difference, is that some clothes fit and others don't. I think the term for this is body dysmorphia.

Confidence has to come from within. I've read lots of books on developing confidence and self esteem, and they give lots of advice on how to build yourself up. From positive affirmations to "faking it until you make it," you'll find some helpful, and some contradictory advice. In my opinion, a person needs to change his/her entire outlook on life and learn to think more positively in order to have the kinds of changes in thoughts and emotions you are looking for. Therapy does help!

One thing that helps me is to remind myself that we are all part of the same human community and we are all in this together. Every person has an innate self-worth. I do, and so do you. Maybe reminding yourself of that will help.

I stay about the same weight, no matter what. It is just my size that changes. I have been as small as a size 8 and as large as a size 18. I am 5'4" and weigh 186 pounds. I am almost always between 183 and 188 since before my second pregnancy (even while pregnant).

What has helped me over time is looking at pictures from different times.

Another thing that helped was an activity we did in one group at church to show that everyone is different and all are beautiful. We had some people who wore size 6 Tall and weighed over 200 pound all the way to the other extreme of a person who was so large her doctors wouldn't let her on their scales for fear that she would break them. She had to make her own clothing with a waist of 54"!!! On our scales, we found out that her doctors were wrong. She weighed less than 125 pounds!

After getting a different doctor, she gained weight and lost inches down to a waist of 32"! She told me that size is relative. It takes us a while to see that we have changed. Changing the clothing styles or keeping before and after pictures on her mirror were the things that helped her.

Good luck to you. I hope you have fun on your vacation.

I know exactly how you feel. I lost 40 lbs over about 2 years and am still losing because I can't get over how I look to myself. Everyone comments about how skinny I am and how I can't lose any more weight but I still just see my stomach sticking out and it frustrates me. I've read on other threads that it takes years to get over it, which makes sense because I was overweight for most of my life and that's just how I feel, even now that I'm basically at a healthy weight.

It's hard to remember, but the mirror doesn't lie. I just keep looking at myself and try to focus on the progress I'm making, not the work I still have to do. It also helps to remember you're not alone. search for BDD or Body Dysmorphia Disorder on the threads, you'll see how many people feel EXACTLY like you do.

Congrats on your loss, and best of luck on your progress!

I completely know what you mean. Whether I've been at my highest (160 lbs) or at my lowest (130 lbs) I still didn't feel comfortable with how I looked in the mirror. Sure I was slimmer but my body wasn't in the right composition for me to fully feel comfortable rocking a bathing suit.

This time when I'm losing weight (currently 150 lbs), I'm ensuring I'm lifting heavier so that I maintain and build on my muscle mass so that I will have better body composition then what I did before. I'm hoping I'll be happier with how I feel when I get to my goal of 135 lbs. I'm also working on my self-talk as well - "fake it until you make it" as someone else said.

One other item that I'm working on is looking at my measurements more than the number on the scale. Perhaps that's one thing you can try....focus on your measurements, not your weight or the mirror because they don't always tell you the whole story.