Why can't I stop my dessert routine?!

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Every night when the family goes to bed I always grab a little something sweet to eat. It's become routine, and now that I am trying so hard to rid myself of garbage food, I find it like an addiction. I think about that dessert sitting there in the kitchen and have no self control. Its like an addiction!

Whats crazy is half the time I don't even want to eat dessert, but I feel like something is missing if I don't eat it. Gah, I really need to figure out how to get out of this mindframe!
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  • lemurcat12
    lemurcat12 Posts: 30,886 Member
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    I don't think there's any reason to worry about it, but if you feel like you are getting too attached or expecting it too much (I was a bit with my bit of ice cream in the evening), maybe keep the routine but switch it up. I decided this month I'd cut out my evening dessert and since I still often have calories left I've been experimenting with nuts or fruit and yogurt or some cheese and actually really enjoying the alternative.
  • Kalikel
    Kalikel Posts: 9,626 Member
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    Either save calories up to eat at night or break the habit.

    Bad habits are hard to break! They don't say that for nothing. :) This weight loss thing is a lot of hard work, day after day after day.

    Once you break the habits, it gets a little easier, though. IMO. :)
  • kimw91
    kimw91 Posts: 355 Member
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    If you plan your dessert into your daily calorie/macro allowance, it shouldn't be a problem. If you tend to go for the really high calorie stuff, try to find some healthier options. E.g. quark mixed with stevia and cocoa powder instead of chocolate pudding, a microwave mug cake instead of a piece of actual cake.

    If you don't want it, don't eat it. Could it be you feel like you'd be missing out, because you're treating dessert like something you shouldn't have and therefore want even more? Is there something you could have instead of dessert that would stop that feeling, such as a cappuccino or some fruit?

    You could also try to have your dessert earlier on in the day, when you do feel like it. In any case, don't turn to sneakily eating it in the kitchen, that won't make you feel any better. If you want dessert, enjoy it. Sit down at the table and consciously eat it, rather than being annoyed at every bite.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
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    Save calories for it. And just make it smaller.
  • Tilran
    Tilran Posts: 626 Member
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    I definitely feel your pain here....I have a massive sweet tooth and it always ends up getting me into trouble. Trying to factor in sweets into a day isn't really the solution. You go out for dinner and order a dessert, the thing will be 500-1000 calories depending on what you get...there isn't much you can do to factor that in. If you are like me, this isn't a rare treat...and people telling you to make it a rare treat clearly don't understand what you are going through. Again, I feel for you and can only tell you that I try to remind myself of my goal anytime I start thinking about it and I have a very supportive girlfriend who is always on top of me when I start thinking about something sweet.

    Some people will say to portion control, but again I say they don't understand the issue and if you take a bite of sweets, the whole thing is going in your belly and self control goes out of the window.

    Get rid of the sweets in the house, and try to simply avoid them as much as possible....you'll trip up from time to time and make a mistake, but learn from it and move on.
  • arkansasteriann
    arkansasteriann Posts: 22 Member
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    I had a ton of company over the holidays and was constantly serving food.... snacks, appetizers, meals, and desserts. of course I fell into the habit of having some of those things myself and after all the guests left I found I still wanted to indulge in those new habits. I gained 8 pounds and I was very depressed. I finally decided to go cold turkey and went searched "egg fast". I did that for one day (dropped 3 pounds, I know mostly water, but still encouraging), the next day I added some meat. almost no carbs. second day dropped another 1.5 pounds. this is actually day 3 and since I normally do grain free and TRY to do low carbs I feel great. I think this is helping me to get rid of the urge to snack at night. I'm NOT saying this is an idea for everyone! but if you need to break some habits and get out of a rut this COULD help. stay healthy!
  • wkwebby
    wkwebby Posts: 807 Member
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    If you can't stop yourself, you've just got to stop stocking the stuff you're reaching for. Otherwise, it your family wants it, keep it somewhere that is REALLY difficult and a pain in the butt to get to (i.e. top most shelf above the fridge). If you REALLY want it, then you'll have to work a little bit for it. You'll have to think if it is worth it that night, rather than simply grabbing and eating. That was my trick when I was younger. Now it is still the trick, but it is more of an out of sight, out of mind thing.
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
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    You can't stop it because you choose not to stop it.

    At some point, you'll choose to stop it, or you'll stay on the same track and figure out how to make it work.

    Routine with no willpower =/= addiction. >_<
  • Brittany91389
    Brittany91389 Posts: 32 Member
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    I have one mean sweet tooth. I can have a great diet day where everything that is going in my mouth is planned and on point but 15 minutes after my healthy dinner, my sweet tooth attacks me. It's a struggle to stop myself from eating. What I did was figure out my triggers. Sitting on the couch watching TV is a big trigger for me to snack. No matter what time of day it is, or how recently I've eaten, if I'm on the couch and the TV is on, I want a snack. Another trigger is seeing the food. I don't generally want it unless I see it. For me it was seeing a snack food in the fridge when I was putting away leftovers or putting stuff away in my pantry. Basically I stopped stocking sugary snack foods (graham crackers, ice cream, cake, pie), even the 100 calorie ones. If I wanted dessert I had to go and get it, and at that point in the night I'm done for the day. I'm usually in my PJ's and ready to conk out for the night. Once I get over the sugar craving the other snack cravings kick in, the salty ones, for that I find a spot away from my trigger area (i.e. the TV) take my water bottle with me, and find something to occupy me for 20 minutes (like paying the bills) and the craving goes away. If it doesn't, I can have a snack. A square of chocolate, or a snack sized homestyle popcorn. It takes a crazy amount of discipline. It sucks, but it's getting easier.
  • Francl27
    Francl27 Posts: 26,371 Member
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    Stop buying the things you can't eat in moderation. Don't eat at places that have desserts that you like.

    It's pretty much what I do (ok, except this week, but I have family visiting and have been indulging too much). I've found that a couple chocolate covered hazelnuts typically satisfy my dessert craving for less than 50 calories.
  • lemurcat12
    lemurcat12 Posts: 30,886 Member
    edited January 2015
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    Tilran wrote: »
    I definitely feel your pain here....I have a massive sweet tooth and it always ends up getting me into trouble. Trying to factor in sweets into a day isn't really the solution. You go out for dinner and order a dessert, the thing will be 500-1000 calories depending on what you get

    This doesn't follow. You can factor it in without getting some restaurant dessert. I'm not saying someone needs to factor it in, of course, but half a cup of ice cream is about 200 calories, IME, or a bit more, and there are lower calorie options than that. My chocolate cookie recipe is about 200 calories/cookie and you could make them smaller. There are tons of even lower calorie desserts. I lost lots of weight eating ice cream in particular, since it's quite easy to factor in, especially if you exercise.

    Clearly some restaurant dessert should be a rarer treat unless you have more calories than I personally do, but same with stuff like Chicago-style pizza.
    Some people will say to portion control, but again I say they don't understand the issue and if you take a bite of sweets, the whole thing is going in your belly and self control goes out of the window.

    I'm sorry if that's an issue for you, but you shouldn't assume it is for everyone, and many think that making foods "off limits" can exacerbate the problem. I'm much more likely to overeat something if I have any if I've created a dynamic where I think I will and having it is seen as a major no, no and something not to be expected to happen again. That's perfect set up for thinking "what the heck" and going nuts.

    Far better to accept that I can choose whether to eat it or not and just force myself to actually think about it before I do.
  • dbmata
    dbmata Posts: 12,950 Member
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    lemurcat12 wrote: »
    Far better to accept that I can choose whether to eat it or not and just force myself to actually think about it before I do.
    Exactly.

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  • guimauveconfections
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    Thanks all! All really great comments. At this early stage in my weight loss adventure, I really do feel like I don't have the willpower to just say no. It really does feel like an addiction! I understand that nothing should be off limits, but when your eating crap food and trying to conceal it to hide the large amount of halloween/xmas candy wrappers out of shame, somethings wrong. And I can't just get rid of it because my husband has a huge sweet tooth and always wants candy/ice cream/cookies in the house. Kids too of course.

    So for now, it is waaaay high up where I can't reach it. I've stocked my fridge with yogurt and frozen berries for parfaits with a drizzle of honey and crushed walnuts, and some back up atkins fake candy lol...just in case I get desperate.
  • RockstarWilson
    RockstarWilson Posts: 836 Member
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    Every night when the family goes to bed I always grab a little something sweet to eat. It's become routine, and now that I am trying so hard to rid myself of garbage food, I find it like an addiction. I think about that dessert sitting there in the kitchen and have no self control. Its like an addiction!

    Whats crazy is half the time I don't even want to eat dessert, but I feel like something is missing if I don't eat it. Gah, I really need to figure out how to get out of this mindframe!

    Stop being petty. You have no will power. Plain and simple. Gain will power, and you will stop the habit. Honestly, if you can't control it, and you are saying that it is the food's fault, why have it in the house? The kids (and husband?) can do without until the weekend. The best way to solve a problem is by elimination. If you can eliminate the variables, you can find the control.
  • La5Vega5Girl
    La5Vega5Girl Posts: 709 Member
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    i grew up eating dessert every night. my mom made the most amazing sweets! it was not even an option to have dinner w/o dessert. LOL i still like something sweet after a savory meal, but now i just either choose something small w/in calorie goal, or skip it altogether. funny how childhood habits can stick with us! :p
  • guimauveconfections
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    Every night when the family goes to bed I always grab a little something sweet to eat. It's become routine, and now that I am trying so hard to rid myself of garbage food, I find it like an addiction. I think about that dessert sitting there in the kitchen and have no self control. Its like an addiction!

    Whats crazy is half the time I don't even want to eat dessert, but I feel like something is missing if I don't eat it. Gah, I really need to figure out how to get out of this mindframe!

    Stop being petty. You have no will power. Plain and simple. Gain will power, and you will stop the habit. Honestly, if you can't control it, and you are saying that it is the food's fault, why have it in the house? The kids (and husband?) can do without until the weekend. The best way to solve a problem is by elimination. If you can eliminate the variables, you can find the control.

    Please only thoughtful comments here only. Some of you may not quite understand what its like to deal with this, and that's fine. The fact is, that the world does not revolve around me. I am not the only one in my home, and it's not fair to my other 3 family members to have to remove their desserts and sweets because of me. It's something I have to work on. Temptation is everywhere, I have to be the one strong enough to make heathy decisions.
  • emilytaylo
    emilytaylo Posts: 7 Member
    edited January 2015
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    This is the first time that I have stuck to a "healthy eating plan" for more than 2 months. It's been 9 months & I've lost 73 lbs & the only thing I really see I'm doing different is ALLOWING myself dessert. In all these months I have rarely felt deprived because I knew once the kids were in bed I could have a quiet snack without sharing. I keep Skinny Cow candy bars or low-fat ice cream (which I only serve in small 5oz Dixie cups to keep portion size) at home & I NEVER feel guilty eating it because I plan the 110-150 calories into my day. I can't keep the snacks I used to eat in the house because I'd overdo, but a little lower cal treat at night really works for me.

    I think we all have to find what works best for our lifestyles, stressors, tastes, etc. If you need to go "cold turkey" for your personality then that is right for you. I don't think it is a will power/weakess/strength type thing. Sometimes it just takes time to make a life style change that will stick.
  • guimauveconfections
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    emilytaylo wrote: »
    This is the first time that I have stuck to a "healthy eating plan" for more than 2 months. It's been 9 months & I've lost 73 lbs & the only thing I really see I'm doing different is ALLOWING myself dessert. In all these months I have rarely felt deprived because I knew once the kids were in bed I could have a quiet snack without sharing. I keep Skinny Cow candy bars or low-fat ice cream (which I only serve in small 5oz Dixie cups to keep portion size) at home & I NEVER feel guilty eating it because I plan the 110-150 calories into my day. I can't keep the snacks I used to eat in the house because I'd overdo, but a little lower cal treat at night really works for me.

    I think we all have to find what works best for our lifestyles, stressors, tastes, etc. If you need to go "cold turkey" for your personality then that is right for you. I don't think it is a will power/weakess/strength type thing. Sometimes it just takes time to make a life style change that will stick.

    Wow congrats! That is amazing! And yes, I hope eventually I can maintain a healthy relationship with my treats :)
  • AlabasterVerve
    AlabasterVerve Posts: 3,171 Member
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    For me, LCHF took care of the insatiable cravings and out of control eating. Once that was solved it was a lot easier to establish an eating pattern that controls my weight -- which is simply eating two large meals a day without snacking and nothing after dinner.

    It's not for everyone but low carb can be extremely family friendly if you cook. No one ever complains about eating roasted chicken with gravy and a green vegetable, a ribeye and salad, or chicken and broccoli with a homemade alfredo sauce -- it's just real food with fat (butter, cheese, sauces etc.) taking the place of a carby side. But I have the time/luxury to cook the two meals I eat a day. I'm not sure low carb would be sustainable for me if I was still working 60 hour work weeks relying on packaged foods and takeout.

    http://www.dietdoctor.com/lchf