How do I get serious?

Unfortunately it is hard, but I started by always writing down (I keep a piece of paper or small note book handy) what it is that is difficult for me to do or I simply cannot do because of my weight and I keep the list by my bed side and look at it and read it aloud. I have also a list of what I will be able to do when I lose weight and I read those aloud in the morning and night. Keep after it!

Small steps. Really small. And then build on them.

I've been working on this for a year. Actually quite a few years - I used to be about 20 kilos heavier than I was when I started logging on MFP.

So, small steps, and build on them. For example, I started by eating all the usual stuff, but making half my plate at each meal consist of the lower calorie fruit and vegetables; for me, that was anything but bananas, avocado, potatoes, beans, peas and sweetcorn basically. This was for two reasons - veggies made me feel generally better. And all those veggies filled me up. I didn't deny myself any of my 'bad' foods. I just ate lots of good foods along side them.

(Later I learned that by eating enough protein I could stop myself craving 'bad' foods, overeating and bingeing. I'm not that interested now in the foods that I used to crave, the ones that triggered binges. I can have chocolate in the house and NOT NEED TO HAVE IT ALL IN MAH BELLY RIGHT THIS MINUTE. )

The next step was to move more. I wanted to do Couch to 5k, but that seemed impossible. So instead of running for 30 minutes, I went walking for 30 minutes, and made the commitment to do that 3 times a week. It's not much. You can even break it up into smaller chunks of ten minutes. Then I added in intervals of walking as fast as I could. After three months of that, I wasn't quite ready for running for 1 minute - which feels like a long freaking time at first. But I could sort of slowly jog at a brisk walking pace for 30 seconds. C25K is a 9 week program. It took me about 6 months to get to where I could 'run' for 30 minutes. Small steps. :-)

And the next step is the hardest - learn to pick yourself up quickly right after you fall. That means starting again tomorrow at first. And work up to starting again at the next meal. Forgive yourself. Be kind to yourself. This is the only body you have. Ok, it might not be fabulous right now, but you have to love it anyway, with all its wobbly bits. Why? Because hating it leads to negative emotions, and negative emotions often lead to overeating on dopamine fix foods full of fat and sugar. That's a nasty downward spiral. Honestly, when you are kind to yourself and the body you have now, you'll find it easier to work towards the body you want in the future.

Work out WHY you want to eat the cake/chocolate/doritos. Pay attention to it. It's often nothing to do with hunger. Work on the reasons behind the craving.

This is a long journey, take it slowly and you'll start to find things to enjoy about it. When I was at school and always the last, wheezing, aching, exhausted, breathless one back from horrible cross country runs, I never thought I running could be a fun thing to do. Why would you do that to yourself? Ugh. But I look forward to it now. I also enjoy finding ways to make cake fit my macros. :-)

Do these three things and you WILL start to feel better mentally and physically. And hopefully that feeling will become addictive and lead you to make more changes.

And once you've managed those three it won't seem like such a big step to tracking calories in and out. Everyone on here will tell you it's as simple as making sure you eat fewer calories than you burn. Because it actually is that simple, really. You can still have cake/chocolate/doritos. There are no bad foods. You just need to make sure that if you are having cake today, at some point today or tomorrow maybe, you need to create meals that have fewer calories so that you don't go over your allowance. You'll find that a big chunk of lean meat and some stir fried veggies or salad will satisfy you just as well as a Big Mac meal.

For me, I just decided I was going to do it. I don't know how to get someone else to do the same thing. In the words of Yoda, you either do it or you do not. There is no try. If you aren't going to be serious, I would suggest that you shouldn't attempt it at all. If you do, you will just fail and end up worse off than before.

maidentl wrote: »

Realize that it does not have to be this hard. There's no reason to label food as "bad" much less throw it away...

You are absolutely right, but some foods are triggers to binge. I really haven't given much up, but I have my trigger foods for sure! Doing what you said is definitely easier, making sure you are eating at least 20% below your calories for the day. I think health can come later. For me, I can't keep trigger foods in the house. I just don't have that kind of self control (maybe one day)!

BFDeal wrote: »

Just turn your baseball cap backwards. That's when you know stuff just got real. For serious bro. It. Is. Now. On.

haha I love this! I need to take your advice. Cap, backwards!

I found this on another forum and thought of you, thought it might be really useful. http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242/a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants/p1 Good luck again! You can do it!

You have to want to do it.

Alot of great advice already given. You have to want to do it for yourself. Make small changes you know you can achieve and commit. You can do this. Good luck. You will get lots of support here.