frustration beyond all else

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i am highly frustrated with myself, and my inability to lose weight. I need some help with motivation and some success stories and some advice on things that have worked for others! i have a serious problem with self control and saying no, so i think thats part of my problem. any input would be highly appreciated!
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  • wizzybeth
    wizzybeth Posts: 3,578 Member
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    Do you log your food? Everything you eat? With 100% precision and accuracy?
  • abb117
    abb117 Posts: 81 Member
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    I agree with wizzybeth. Log absolutely everything then you might be less likely to eat something because you don't want to log it. I also keep a pack of gum and a pack of icebreaker duos on me at all times so that when I want to eat a snack just because, I have one of those
  • StaciMarie1974
    StaciMarie1974 Posts: 4,138 Member
    edited February 2015
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    I think of food/calories as a budget. Generally on a daily basis but sometimes 'big picture'. I also realized that I lived a sedentary lifestyle (desk job, spending my nights sitting in front of a computer or on a couch) and that is NOT a good way to live.

    So now I choose to be active. To find things to do, rather than just sit back and watch others do stuff. And again, I think of food as a budget. I make an effort to get a variety of fruits/veggies and protein each day. And fill in the rest as I see fit. (Grains, healthy fats are important also but these tend to happen without me 'making' them a priority.) I will generally pre-plan the day, or at least fill in tentative meal & snack plans by midday. Then adjust as needed. This helps me see if I need to cut back on one thing or aim for more of another.

    Stats I'm now 40 years old, 123.5 pounds, 5' 5.5". 12-25-13 I weighed 178.5. I reached my goal weight (being under 130) on 10-11-14 and have been maintaining since, finding balance. For most of the time I was losing I ate between 1400-1600, weighing all my food. As I got closer to my goal I increased to 1600-1800. Now 1800-2000 to maintain. I can fit practically anything, though some things are not 'worth it'.

    I'm working on my running - and will compete in a 1/2 marathon on Sunday where I expect to combine running & walking. I enjoy running though I'm not the best at it! I will do a 5k in March where I plan to run the whole thing and a 10k in July. Again, my goal is to run the entire distance. Having physical goals/events to work on helps me stay focuses.

    I combine activities when I can. I'm a full time grad student, work a full time job & a part time job. I have 3 kids & a husband. I combine hobbies like reading or watching TV with working on the treadmill. I find things to do outside on Saturday. As the weather improves I expect to do things with the family like trail hikes. :)
  • TwinkieDong
    TwinkieDong Posts: 1,564 Member
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    you have to work on the self control, you have to want it, want it BAD!!!!!!!!! Remember why you are on your journey. If you still cant control yourself, maybe try hypnosis? I heard that can work, or even acupuncture.
  • diannethegeek
    diannethegeek Posts: 14,776 Member
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    Okay, this is going to sound odd, but practice, practice, practice. Willpower and self control are a lot like a muscle. They can be trained. Every time you practice saying no your willpower is getting a little stronger. Sometimes we overuse it and it fails at the end of the day, but that's okay too. Give yourself a little rest and the willpower will come back.

    For me, I had to come up with strategies beyond locking myself in the house with nothing but healthy foods and no temptations ever. That's just not sustainable! :drinker: I dieted through what I call the year of weddings. Seriously, in a six month period I attended four weddings, plus all of the showers, dress fittings, craft parties, and bachelorette parties that came along with them. There were definitely days that I failed and ate too much.

    But there were also days that I learned to step back from the snacks. Days that I stopped at just one cupcake, despite the platter literally being shoved at me for more. Days when I just said no to another drink. And I got there by practicing my willpower. Sometimes literally deciding how I would say no in this situation or that situation by practicing it in the car on the way there.

    "No thank you, I've had enough," seems like such a simple phrase. But every time I said it I felt bad for my own personal reasons that probably don't make sense to anyone. But I had to get around them and learn to say no. And I did it by practicing.
  • NikiChicken
    NikiChicken Posts: 576 Member
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    I have to echo everyone else. To be successful, you need to weigh, measure and log everything you eat. That and have lots of patience. I just hit 90 pounds down today. The single biggest reason for my success is that I made the commitment to log everything I eat - good, bad or ugly. Day in and day out.
  • bennettinfinity
    bennettinfinity Posts: 865 Member
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    OP deactivated... 9 minutes... is that a new record?
  • gothchiq
    gothchiq Posts: 4,590 Member
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    What works for me is, if I know I will binge on something, or sabotage my progress with it in any way, I don't buy it or allow it in my home! You can't scarf it down if you don't have it. Substitute things with lower cal and higher nutrition. Smoothies made with frozen fruit are just as delish as ice cream IMHO. Enjoy many flavors of coffee and tea; use decaf if necessary. Hummus and vegetables, or popcorn, are good snacks.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
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    Here's tips I picked up from my therapy sessions this past year.

    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/jgnatca/view/halting-a-binge-session-715131
  • girlviernes
    girlviernes Posts: 2,402 Member
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    The success board is great for motivation. Also, start making friends on here and make sure you log your exercise and complete your diary at the end of the day. The likes and congrats will help build your motivation.
  • GameGirl777
    GameGirl777 Posts: 60 Member
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    Commit to a healthy lifestyle. Rid your home of junk food. You don't have to say "no" to everything all the time. Short-term goals will help! Say no to sugar for a week and then after that, eat all you want (if you want to). Say no to fast food for a week. Say no to alcohol for one weekend. You can do it!! Eventually you will build healthy habits into your life and the weight will follow.
  • emdeesea
    emdeesea Posts: 1,823 Member
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    Seriously? Lasted all of 10 minutes at best. Yeah, weight loss takes a little longer than that, sorry.
  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
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    I thought she vanished an Dianne gave very good advice there. I always think its a bit depressing when people cant see the conection between what they are doing and how that relates to the results.

    Maybe she will come back?
  • SergeantSausage
    SergeantSausage Posts: 1,673 Member
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    Learn to say no.

    Logging does no good, folks, unless you can say "no" to going over your quota, right?
  • Brimixed
    Brimixed Posts: 186 Member
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    First, feel free to add me as a friend on here! I'm always looking for motivating people :)

    Next! Try switching up your workout routine! Try hot yoga or lifting weights. Sometimes your body can get in a rut and needs to be switched up :)

    Secondly, (broken record here) commit to a healthy lifestyle! Try to make GOOD/POSITIVE changes for 28 days and see what happens!

    Journal Journal Journal! Write down not only what you're eating, but also what you're feeling and thinking. I find that a healthy and happy mindset is also key in feeling better about yourself and it has a trickle down effect to every other facet of your life.

    You can do this!
  • queenliz99
    queenliz99 Posts: 15,317 Member
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    Sometimes this site gets glitchy, should could be still here.
  • TheCriz76
    TheCriz76 Posts: 83 Member
    edited February 2015
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    all good advice given
  • diannethegeek
    diannethegeek Posts: 14,776 Member
    edited February 2015
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    queenliz99 wrote: »
    Sometimes this site gets glitchy, should could be still here.

    ^This was my thought too. I just get sent to a blank page, not the usual "This user has deactivated" message. Either way, the advice may be useful for plenty of lurkers who are struggling with the same things.

  • 999tigger
    999tigger Posts: 5,235 Member
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    Learn to say no.

    Logging does no good, folks, unless you can say "no" to going over your quota, right?

    Its a first step and an important tool in helping a person understand what they are consuming. They cna start to tighten down later, but understanding whats happening and the consequences of not saying no is a good start.