Dieting Anxiety- compulsions to cheat, sugar & carb addiction

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Hi all.
I'm new. To all of this. I've never had weight loss success in the past, so for a long while I've just not tried to loose weight. And of course, the scale is reflecting that. I've never "demonstrated" to myself that I can do it, though I've seen others in my family who have had amazing transformations. And then gained it all back and then some. :neutral_face:
I'm scared. Scared to get going. Scared to commit to something that, according to my friends and family's journeys - I'll very likely fail at. Scared to "announce" to anyone that I'm doing this because of the expectations that I'm setting, and the side-eye glance they'll give if I reach for a cookie.
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The idea of dieting is super uncomfortable. This is ridiculous- and I know it - but the sheer idea of "dieting" makes me already think about cheating & eating crap. Like I am rebelling against something that's clearly good for me- because the idea of complying to a diet sounds like a nightmare.

Also, think I'm a sugar and carb addict. For real. It haunts me. When I try to lower/cut my sugar intake, my body craves it like nothing else. I fixate on it. I cave in and feed the beast. How can I get past this seemingly hard-wired compulsion?

*my baby step* Today I commit to writing down what I eat. Including that damn jelly-filled doughnut that someone brought into work that I couldn't resist.

Your support, and encouragement is helpful, especially if you have some tips on how to turn off the cravings and comply with a diet.
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Replies

  • watmall
    watmall Posts: 4 Member
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    I couldn't have written it better myself. I feel the same way. You can Ad me as a friend and maybe we can help each other out.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,139 Member
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    here is my advice.

    start today, not a day from now, not a month from now.

    Do the following:

    1. enter all your stats into MFP and set for one pound per week loss
    2. get a food scale
    3. use the food scale to weigh all solid foods.
    4. make sure that you log everything that you eat into MFP.
    5. try not to use the generic entries but use the ones that are USDA.
    6. go into custom setting and set your macro percent = Protein/Fats/Carbs to 35p/35c/30 fats
    7. this is not necessary but I would suggest finding an active activity that you like, like running, walking, bicycling, lifting, etc and do something so that you move more..
    8. This is the most important one. Please stop assigning moralistic values to food. Food is not "good," "bad," or "crap", it is just something that your body uses to get energy for bodily functions. Yes, this means that you can have foods like pizza, ice cream, cookies, bagels etc incorporated into your day. Just make sure that you hit your calorie/macor/micro targets for they day. when you boil it all down weight loss comes down to calories in vs calories out...Overall diet and dosage is what matter, not individual food choice.
    9. repeat all this until you get to desired results..

    good luck to you ...
  • hoyalawya2003
    hoyalawya2003 Posts: 631 Member
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    Don't diet. Change your life. If that sounds scary, realize you can do it in little steps. Today's baby step is a good one--keep it up until it becomes a habit. Then try another habit.

    I can't cut out foods--the minute I tell myself I can't have something, I want it. You don't have to cut out foods. You can eat jelly donuts. Not all the time, not all you want. You have to make adjustments elsewhere in your day to make room for the jelly donut. But you can. Believing in yourself is the most important part.
  • Evenstranger
    Evenstranger Posts: 69 Member
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    Welcome! I'm fairly new (again), just hit 20 days. I certainly understand the concerns about being carb-conscious, but as many others will tell you here, unless there's an underlying medical issue, it's less about controlling carbs, and more about controlling calories. Tracking what I eat has helped me realize how much I've been eating, and then making the choice to reduce the volume to cut calories, rather than eliminate the food entirely. So if my habit is eating four cookies, maybe I'll cut back to three, and save the extra calories. My body won't know the difference, my brain is satisfied and my calorie goal is met. Win-win all around.
  • JacquiH73
    JacquiH73 Posts: 124 Member
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    Don't think about it as diet think about it as a choice. A choice between healthy and unhealthy not good and bad. The donut wasn't bad but was it healthy? Would an apple sprinkled with cinnamon have been healthier? It would have been equally sweet.

    If you want to lose weight all you have to do is use more calories than you consume on a daily basis. That's it.

    If you want to look and feel healthier make healthier eating choices. Replace processed foods with whole foods. Gradually reduce your daily sugar intake. Read labels and keep your sugars, sodium and saturated fats low.

    Feel free to friend me for support and my diary is always open :smiley:
  • WillLift4Tats
    WillLift4Tats Posts: 1,699 Member
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    Baby steps are definitely key. Take it slow and steady. It's a BIG change, so why rush it?

    Also, to speak to the anxiety. I can totally understand that. We don't wish to be uncomfortable, and making a huge change to your lifestyle is just that. To ease some of that anxiety, don't "announce" anything to anyone. Will it change anything besides make you more anxious? Probably not. Just announce to yourself that you're making these changes, and let the rest fall where it may. People may notice you have different habits (doubt it honestly, but they may), but to be honest, it's absolutely no one else's business but your own!

    When you announce your plans, you invite a lot of unneeded/unwanted commentary. Just skip all that and just do you. :)
  • Exquisitern
    Exquisitern Posts: 89 Member
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    When I first started, I didn't tell anyone. I know alot of people get a partner, but it's better for me when I do most of it, because I want to change myself. I was tired of being who I was and I'm getting older and want to be able to travel when I retire and I couldn't do that if I was steadily gaining weight. I started in 2013 and weighed 250lbs. I initially started just cutting out junk food, eating healthier in the daytime and eating a reasonable meal at night. In one year I lost 50 lbs, Not the fastest, but it was great. I had not been exercising prior to that at all. I knew I had to up my game and started adding in walking. I went down to 175 lbs which was a 75 lbs loss in October 2014, but was walking/jogging 4 miles 5x's week. I took off for a few months because of the cold weather, but have since started back at a fitness center. I gained to 185.6, but have come down to 177.6 now. I want to get to 145 lbs.
    I try to eat sensibly, If I really want it, I eat it. I don't advertise to my family what I am doing, they can see, my body is changing. If my daughter says, that's not on your diet, I say everything is on Donna's diet.
    The only time we fail is when we quit trying. Even if you have a bad day, know that you can start over the next day.
    Good luck on your journey to a healthier you! You can do.
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,139 Member
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    JacquiH73 wrote: »
    Don't think about it as diet think about it as a choice. A choice between healthy and unhealthy not good and bad. The donut wasn't bad but was it healthy? Would an apple sprinkled with cinnamon have been healthier? It would have been equally sweet.

    If you want to lose weight all you have to do is use more calories than you consume on a daily basis. That's it.

    If you want to look and feel healthier make healthier eating choices. Replace processed foods with whole foods. Gradually reduce your daily sugar intake. Read labels and keep your sugars, sodium and saturated fats low.

    Feel free to friend me for support and my diary is always open :smiley:

    apple and a donut both have sugar, so not really sure what difference is.

    A donut has fats/carbs/sugars all of which are essential macronutrients. If the donut is eaten in the context of an overall diet that hits all other macors/micros then it is not "unhealthy"....
  • WillLift4Tats
    WillLift4Tats Posts: 1,699 Member
    Options
    When I first started, I didn't tell anyone. I know alot of people get a partner, but it's better for me when I do most of it, because I want to change myself. I was tired of being who I was and I'm getting older and want to be able to travel when I retire and I couldn't do that if I was steadily gaining weight. I started in 2013 and weighed 250lbs. I initially started just cutting out junk food, eating healthier in the daytime and eating a reasonable meal at night. In one year I lost 50 lbs, Not the fastest, but it was great. I had not been exercising prior to that at all. I knew I had to up my game and started adding in walking. I went down to 175 lbs which was a 75 lbs loss in October 2014, but was walking/jogging 4 miles 5x's week. I took off for a few months because of the cold weather, but have since started back at a fitness center. I gained to 185.6, but have come down to 177.6 now. I want to get to 145 lbs.
    I try to eat sensibly, If I really want it, I eat it. I don't advertise to my family what I am doing, they can see, my body is changing. If my daughter says, that's not on your diet, I say everything is on Donna's diet.
    The only time we fail is when we quit trying. Even if you have a bad day, know that you can start over the next day.
    Good luck on your journey to a healthier you! You can do.

    I love this! So true. No need to cut anything out or make up these ridiculous rules that you "can't" have this or that. For me anyways, that just makes me crave it more and I end up on a binge.

    Everything is on the diet. Just not all of it every day. Moderation.
  • Laurend224
    Laurend224 Posts: 1,748 Member
    Options
    ndj1979 wrote: »
    here is my advice.

    start today, not a day from now, not a month from now.

    Do the following:

    1. enter all your stats into MFP and set for one pound per week loss
    2. get a food scale
    3. use the food scale to weigh all solid foods.
    4. make sure that you log everything that you eat into MFP.
    5. try not to use the generic entries but use the ones that are USDA.
    6. go into custom setting and set your macro percent = Protein/Fats/Carbs to 35p/35c/30 fats
    7. this is not necessary but I would suggest finding an active activity that you like, like running, walking, bicycling, lifting, etc and do something so that you move more..
    8. This is the most important one. Please stop assigning moralistic values to food. Food is not "good," "bad," or "crap", it is just something that your body uses to get energy for bodily functions. Yes, this means that you can have foods like pizza, ice cream, cookies, bagels etc incorporated into your day. Just make sure that you hit your calorie/macor/micro targets for they day. when you boil it all down weight loss comes down to calories in vs calories out...Overall diet and dosage is what matter, not individual food choice.
    9. repeat all this until you get to desired results..

    good luck to you ...

    Best advice your going to get.

    Welcome, and good luck
  • Burt_Huttz
    Burt_Huttz Posts: 1,612 Member
    Options
    I have noticed that too - I am on a diet and the urge to cheat is very strong. I'm not sure if it's because women notice that I'm taking care of myself or if I'm getting more results than I've seen, but staying faithful to my wife is a growing challenge. I just tell myself, keep putting one foot in front of the other and she'll follow my example I hope. Good luck in your situation!!
  • tephanies1234
    tephanies1234 Posts: 299 Member
    edited February 2015
    Options
    ndj1979 wrote: »
    JacquiH73 wrote: »
    Don't think about it as diet think about it as a choice. A choice between healthy and unhealthy not good and bad. The donut wasn't bad but was it healthy? Would an apple sprinkled with cinnamon have been healthier? It would have been equally sweet.

    If you want to lose weight all you have to do is use more calories than you consume on a daily basis. That's it.

    If you want to look and feel healthier make healthier eating choices. Replace processed foods with whole foods. Gradually reduce your daily sugar intake. Read labels and keep your sugars, sodium and saturated fats low.

    Feel free to friend me for support and my diary is always open :smiley:

    apple and a donut both have sugar, so not really sure what difference is.

    A donut has fats/carbs/sugars all of which are essential macronutrients. If the donut is eaten in the context of an overall diet that hits all other macors/micros then it is not "unhealthy"....


    ^^ yup! my 250g apple had 26g of sugar today.

  • irejuvenateme
    irejuvenateme Posts: 96 Member
    Options
    Many people have advice, I'll just say what about trying to eat more healthy foods - even if you still have the donut, if you have had veggies and fruits you will have less room for the donuts.

    Logging everything is a great idea to start, that way you can see what you are eating. And have small goals that you can reach - maybe it's just logging for a week, then add on walking xx minutes a day.

    I am my lowest weight probably in my adult life, but I got here by having modest goals and building from there.

    While people swear by calories in calories out, if you live on diet cokes and starve yourself it will never be sustainable - I find thinking about trying to eat food that fuels my body helps me. I am a total sugar junkie too by the way, but I have found that eating fiber in "natural" foods (apples etc) helps fill you up, and looking for good sources of protein have lead me in the right direction. That way it's less about what you "can't" eat than about what you can.

    Good luck!
  • WillLift4Tats
    WillLift4Tats Posts: 1,699 Member
    Options
    Burt_Huttz wrote: »
    I have noticed that too - I am on a diet and the urge to cheat is very strong. I'm not sure if it's because women notice that I'm taking care of myself or if I'm getting more results than I've seen, but staying faithful to my wife is a growing challenge. I just tell myself, keep putting one foot in front of the other and she'll follow my example I hope. Good luck in your situation!!

    tumblr_inline_nilzh28PCG1s07rxz.gif

    Anyways...
  • ndj1979
    ndj1979 Posts: 29,139 Member
    Options
    Burt_Huttz wrote: »
    I have noticed that too - I am on a diet and the urge to cheat is very strong. I'm not sure if it's because women notice that I'm taking care of myself or if I'm getting more results than I've seen, but staying faithful to my wife is a growing challenge. I just tell myself, keep putting one foot in front of the other and she'll follow my example I hope. Good luck in your situation!!

    ummm I think OPs reference to cheating was to food not with people...

    wow LOL
  • farfromthetree
    farfromthetree Posts: 982 Member
    Options
    ndj1979 wrote: »
    Burt_Huttz wrote: »
    I have noticed that too - I am on a diet and the urge to cheat is very strong. I'm not sure if it's because women notice that I'm taking care of myself or if I'm getting more results than I've seen, but staying faithful to my wife is a growing challenge. I just tell myself, keep putting one foot in front of the other and she'll follow my example I hope. Good luck in your situation!!

    ummm I think OPs reference to cheating was to food not with people...

    wow LOL

    That has to be a joke.
  • Need2Exerc1se
    Need2Exerc1se Posts: 13,576 Member
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    No matter what terms you use for food, or eating for weight loss, or any other aspect of this, the sad fact is that most of the people losing weight on this site will fail to keep it off long term. I will likely fail to keep it off long term. Statistics tell us so.

    But using that as a reason not to even try seems silly to me. Some beat the odds. I can't possibly be one of those odds beaters if I don't try. Neither can you.
  • prettygirlstorm1
    prettygirlstorm1 Posts: 722 Member
    Options
    I feel your pain. Let's stop looking at it as a diet but as a life style change. We can have anything as long as it is in moderation. I love "junk food" chips, doritos, cheese curls etc and I want it in excess. I have learned to buy only small bags and 1 at a time. Keeping a food diary helps keep me accountable. I brush my teeth when I feel the need for something sweet. I like candy too. Not chocolate, but now and laters, skittles, peppermints etc and i work those into my daily caloric intake. It is not easy but I am determined to keep plugging away. I seem to sabotage myself when I tell people what I am doing. Also people don't always give you support but rather criticize. "I thought you were on a diet", you can't eat that are so of the things people would say. I like it here because people are supportive, if you have a bad meal they encourage you to do better at the next one. You got this!!!! Good luck and I am sending you a friend request!!