SPECIAL NEEDS PARENTS

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  • melissarhodes
    melissarhodes Posts: 8
    I have 3 children, but only my 8yr old son is autistic. He was diagnosed at 18 months, but it was put on his records at 2..He is a handful and at times I'm ready to walk away.. My daughters, one is older, one is younger than him, are neglected and alot of responsibility is left to the older to help with the younger.. My day in and day out are on him and lately it has been alot more rougher to handle him.. Right now we are looking at putting him on Medication to calm him down.. He has so much anger, so much in my home has been broken. When his father is around it seems to be worse. He has been in schools since we left Hawaii, he was 2. He has did Special Needs school for 3 yrs and Kindergarten 2yr and now he is finally finishing up 1st. He still doesn't know how to read, and his grades are D's and F's. This yr, the school system is telling me they don't want to help him anymore.. Well his Dr is fighting that with me. I'm trying to lose my weight because first of all its not healthy, but there is not a day my son does not tell me how fat I'm am.. So I feel your pain with raising a child with Special needs.. It's not easy, but we all manage and love them..
  • pinkgigi
    pinkgigi Posts: 693 Member
    Sheesh you people are inspirational!

    My son is not counted as 'special needs', but has been a very difficult child to raise. He had to repeat kinder because he was just staring into space and not listening. Straight up with school I was asked to have him evaluated a number of times. Each time, yes he has learning/concentration problems, yes we are going to do .... but they never did. For me, it was a battle of wills to work with him at home, meanwhile my marriage fell apart.

    Then a miracle, I discovered he had a musical gift, which led him to getting a 100% scholarship for a wonderful school, but they didn't know how to help him either. Each parent/teacher interview was hell, and if he didn't do the work at school it came home to me, what good does that do? If they can't help him, what can I do?

    At the age of 15 he had his first epileptic seizure, another setback, meanwhile he continues to sing, and low and behold he is really good and at the age of 18, with doing the bare minimum of work in the final year of school, he manages to get into Arts College. During that year, my second husband passed away with cancer.

    He is flourishing there, but last year at the age of 19, he was diagnosed with second stage cancer. 2 major surgeries and 9 weeks of chemo followed. I lost 22 kgs after my husband died but 12 came back on in the past year, in September I was diagnosed with chronic depression. I am trying to reclaim myself and reclaim my health. So although I do not have the daily struggle you all have, I can sympathise with dealing with my son who is both a gift and a burden, last month he celebrated his 21st birthday.

    My daughter has decided to go away to university so that she can also reclaim her life from under his shadow, so I now have some more time and some more energy resources to dedicate to me. I wish for all of you to reclaim a sense of yourself outside of the caring role, and nurture yourself with healthy food and exercise, love and acceptance.

    GG
  • sunleigh
    sunleigh Posts: 84 Member
    my daughter is 7 years old. She was born with a heart condition and has had many open heart surgeries to try and fix the issues. after her second open heart at 2 months she went into cardiac arrest and now has cerebral palsy b/c of it. I agree I let myself go, i was always last on the list of the many things i needed to do during the day. I have learned over time that I needed to be heathy and take time for me to be a better mom. Good luck with your venture:smile:
  • pjfmaui73
    pjfmaui73 Posts: 408
    I'm here reading everyone's stories with a heavy heart. Because I am feeling your pain and I understand it so well, but some of you have been through so much. I used to be angry...why did my mom have to die when I was 16? Why did my brother have to have schizophrenia and why couldn't he be saved (he committed suicide). Why does my baby have to have autism? I had a realization that life is hard and yes, you may be going through (or have gone through) some terrrible things but there is always someone worse off. I realized that my son choose me ( I have 2 other children also). He is such a joy, but it's also very frustrating and hard at times as you all know. My son turned 3 today and he's pretty nonverbal. He was talking more as a baby. I have him on a gluten and caisen free diet, b/c when he started exhibiting autism ~16-17 months his bowel habits changed. Now that he takes probiotics and digestive enzymes along with a diet free of preservatives (& poss. gluten and caisen) his bowels have cleared up. I try new foods, but he has his favorites...ie spagetti so I mix organic spagetti sauce on things like veggies and he usually eats them. I applaud him when he tries a new food (usually) he will once and if he likes it he'll keep eating it. If he doesn't like it (or he thinks he doesn't) I'll wait a few days or week and try it again. I keep try periodically and sometimes that works and sometimes it doesn't.

    God Bless everyone of you and all your children (special needs & not)

    :flowerforyou:

    Pam
  • Setof2Keys
    Setof2Keys Posts: 681 Member
    Thank you to everyone...not only is sharing weight stories so personal, but you have shared stories about your children, special children and quite possible the most devistating information a parent can receive. Thank you...
  • autiemommy
    autiemommy Posts: 238
    Hey there! Im Jenn and i as well have 2 children with autism. My 4 y/o has a lower functioning autism as well as other delays and a rare chromosone and gene deformity that there is maybe 1 other diagnosed case. He is still non verbal he was also diagnosed at 18 months. He was a preemie so i know your battle. And about 7 months ago they diagnosed my 3 y/o (tommorrow) she will be three with autism as well.

    It is hard and rewarding at the same time. I didnt have time to read all the comments. But please know that i am here for you if you need a buddy for support or to vent too.

    And my other son also has health problems.
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