Anxious About The Gym - Help Needed!

Everybody is there to do their own thing. Generally nobody at the gym cares what other people are doing (unless they are curling in the squat rack )

But seriously, just go and forget other people.

One thing to think about is I would guess about half the people there (maybe more than that) all had the same fear you do, but they went anyway. I would bet a good portion of people there STILL have that insecurity, but yet they are still there.

First off, congratulations for taking steps to improve your health!

You’re right, we aren’t staring at you. We have our own thing going on.

However, what you’re feeling is very common so I get it. There are a lot of strategies to get around this. I’ll list a few:
- wear earbuds and jam to your motivational music.
- hire a personal trainer. When they’re coaching you, you’re less likely to notice others. Also, you’ll learn the right form and get better.
- go to the gym when it is slowest.

I felt the same way a couple of weeks ago when i first went to the gym. But in all honesty you get into a zone with the music blaring and you don't even notice other people. What also helps me is that my gym has the tv so i just listen to my music and focus on the tv.
Also you will notice with walking around from machine to machine that there are all different sizes and ages in the gym and most of them are just focusing on themselves.

herrspoons wrote: »

Headphones in. Music on loud. Do your thing. Leave.

That's it.

This is just what I was going to say.

Also, do a trial at the gym you're considering first (nearly all have this). Make sure it fits you. My gym has people of all sizes and fitness levels. I felt comfortable there when I weighed 300 pounds, and I feel comfortable there now.

Honestly, walking in the first time was hard. I was working on in pajamas because I didn't want to invest in workout clothes until I knew it would "stick." I felt stupid and out of place. But...I hit the elliptical and did my thing. Then the best thing I did was get started with a trainer right away - the gym offered one free session, and I signed up for more because I wanted to learn how to lift weights. He helped me get to know people, he was a friendly face in the gym all the time, and within a few months I felt like I owned the place.

It's trite, but just do it. Get in there and make it happen. Want fitness more than you care about being stared at (sidenote: no one's gonna stare, they're all just in there to make it happen too).

I like making friends. Don't talk to the people with the headphones on doing their thing, but I bet there are some people there just as nervous as you that wouldn't mind a quick chat. At my gym there are lines for treadmills or when you have to work in on equipment. Don't get their life story, just some quick hi's. I also like the fitness classes. My gym is pretty small so this works great, but I wouldn't recommend this at a Planet Fitness. If you are going to a huge gym, no one will look twice at you.

Hire a trainer and have them show you the ropes. If this isn't possible, ask if the gym has an "introduction" type of thing where a trainer can give you a quick tour. Knowing the layout and some basic etiquette can lessen anxiety (at least for me)

Another option is going the first couple times when the gym is less busy. Less of an "audience"

ETA: Go with a plan. If you know what you want to do it's much easier to get in and get it done.

Don't know if it will help, but I have some of the worst anxiety, hell I get anxious when talking to a checkout clerk at the store. Dragging my *kitten* to the gym, even just for signing up was painful.

Fears of what people thought, being made fun of for being overweight, or not using equipment right, whatever.

There was no answer to me, no magical thing to make you dismiss my insecurities. At the end it came down to "*kitten* it. I'm doing the right thing by going to the gym" I ran a ton of scenarios in my head about being mocked or whatever, and I just accepted that I do deserve to be mocked for my weight. I'm fat, so yea. Still doing the right thing at the gym. Yep, if someone confronts me about what the hell I'm doing, I'm going to say "What does it look like? I'm fat, so I'm working on changing that!"

Anyway, not sure if that works for everyone, but being able to admit to yourself who you are frees you from that being used against you. There was a quote that sums it up nicely: "Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not. Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armour yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you."

Edit: Also since I've started going I haven't had one bad experience at all. Most people don't care to pay attention to anyone else around.

When I lack confidence I just put my hoodie on, blast my music and zone out everyone. It's something I've done since I started and still works for me.

dbmata wrote: »

The gym is a terrifying place with a lot of things that can harm you. Avoid it.

O_o

Unless the weights are coming to life at night and trying to eat you, I quite doubt it.

I had the same anxiety for ages - it was my biggest wall to climb in getting back to fitness. We have a free gym in our office building, and I wouldn't use it for the first 3.5 years I was at my job for the fear of someone I knew seeing me wobble and pant and sweat with my huge butt in leggings, silently judging me (or loudly, as had actually happened to me in the past).

I'd started walking outside and had grown to love it, but one day this January it was pouring rain, and I decided to go in and use the gym just to walk on the treadmill; no one could laugh at me walking right?

I went in, and you know what? It was 10:30am, and it was empty. After that I just kept going. I've become used to seeing people I know coming in on occasion (and even talking to them!), and my anxiety levels have slowly dropped. People I know have commented that it's motivating to see me working so hard. Unless the person is a w****r, the only things people are point out are positive ones - you're there, which is more than a person at home on the couch.

To make my point, agreeing with @AliceDark , find out when your chosen gym is at it's emptiest. Go in, use a piece of equipment for even just 10 minutes. That first step is the biggest hurdle to facing your anxiety, and from there, baby steps all the way.

herrspoons wrote: »

Headphones in. Music on loud. Do your thing. Leave.

That's it.

I do this too. I see some people using it as social time, but I really like just tuning into what I'm doing.

I do things differently than most...single set, slow reps, whole body workout. The other day I was going .5 MPH on the treadmill, mainly because that's what I felt like doing but also it's great for balance. I was listening to Pandora comedy station and was cracking up. Then I noticed the reflection of the the two women on ellipticals behind me, one explaining to the other that I must be wearing headphones (which weren't visible due to my hair) this only made me laugh harder at what the confused woman must have been thinking.

Also, I feel more self-conscience when I'm unsure what to do. The first several times I went to the gym I went with the plan to familiarize myself with the equipment (what they are, where they are, and how to use), get my body used the the memory of using said equipment, as well as become aware of what I d of routine I might like and how long it would take.

Therefore, I set all weights to the lowest setting and just focused on learning how to use the machine and how it felt. After a few visits I felt much more comfortable and started added weight.

Good luck and have fun!

~M.C. Turtle

Start with something you are comfortable doing. Stationary bike or something like that, then gradually branch out to other fun things when you feel more comfortable in that scene