I'm so scared right now.

Small steps will get you where you want to be. Start with a fitness program. You will find the more you do the easier it gets. By cooking/preparing all your foods at home you can control what you put in your body...try to stick to all natural foods. Lots of smaller meals throughout the day and plenty of water. Have faith and patience...you can do it!

You have to commit to a new lifestyle forever and the motivation won't always be there and don't be scared of slipping and falling because it's inevitable-but the most successful losers and maintainers learn to pick themselves up, dust themselves off and start all over again (to quote an old song)!
Just create new habits gradually and they will become as familiar to you as brushing your teeth or taking a shower. You don't need motivation for those everyday activities-you just do them when you must!
Keep a sensible deficit-not drastic at all and slowly try to move more in any way that's enjoyable to you.
Eat what you enjoy also. Don't cut everything you love out of your life-that's a sure fire way to binge on those things or regain the weight when you're "done" with the "diet".

I'm male. There are a whole bunch of cliches that can be thrown your way: "It's not a sprint, it's a marathon," etc, but I won't waste your time with those. Nothing truly motivated me until I saw a friend after 4 years. I was unattractively skinny ("skinny fat"), but he was skinnier than me. Fours years later, he was massive/buff. There and then I said "If he can [put on muscle], you can," and I've been working at it ever since. I found a youtube channel that I liked, and followed its advice. I would mix things up by watching different channels every now and then, but I made a point of not trying to "serve too many masters."

There are many things that I feel are vital, but IF I had to pick one "major pitfall," I think it's that people often underestimate the amount of time that it will take to see respectable results. This hinges on doing everything else properly, of course. All the time in the world won't get results if you're not doing things correctly. But, I'm "the fit guy" at work, and am sometimes asked for advice, or "what's the secret?" My answer is "I've been doing this every single day for 2 years and counting." Also, (realistic) short term goals, and (perhaps idealistic) longterm goals.

Shortterm: I don't want to be embarrassed to go to the water park with my daughter this summer.

Longterm: My daughter's 7 year old. I want to be a role model to her of hard work, commitment, healthy eating, and an active lifestyle.

Maybe think of why it is that you want to lose the weight, and every time you think of quitting, try to go back to that. I don't want my daughter to grow up being teased because I didn't teach her to eat properly. I don't want her to suffer self esteem issues due to being picked last for sports, or not at all, because she's not active. I want her to be self confident so that when the bullying does start (because kids will always find a reason), she has a foundation/outlet.

Start now. What if it does work?

maybe smaller incremental goals such as 1 lb per week = 52 lbs/year or even 1/2 lb per week would be 26 lbs in 1 year. Slow but steady and healthy...

For me, it was reaching a point of being willing to change, and what did it was getting high blood pressure readings. It was such a shock for me! I am no longer going to defend my former assertion of being a person who hates to log food and plan meals. I am becoming a whole new person. I don't know what I hate yet.

I've seen so much of that - people coming on here defending their fat person, saying "I don't like vegetables or fruit or anything healthy ... blah blah blah." If you don't like the fat person your old habits have made you, become a new person.

Everyone has great responses. I don't have much to add but if you need a friend for support and motivation feel free to add me! I am finding having supportive friends is motivation itself.