Does it hurt your feelings???

Options
2»

Replies

  • Niveous
    Niveous Posts: 294 Member
    Options
    Not really, I'm doing it for me and no one else, so outside opinions on this particular matter don't hold much weight (no pun intended). That aside though, some people might feel uncomfortable commenting and don't necessarily mean for their lack of comments to be hurtful - I personally wouldn't say anything to someone unless I had a close relationship to them.
  • hottamolly00
    hottamolly00 Posts: 334 Member
    Options
    I think this is because they see you every day. It's hard to notice a change when you see it melting off on a daily basis. Hang up an old pic and see if they notice!
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    Options
    I don't lack self esteem. I just know I compliment EVERYBODY when I see that they look great - even if I don't know them that well. I just figure I'd like my turn!! LOL!!!!
  • wdmom
    wdmom Posts: 24 Member
    Options
    The last time I lost weight, my family started criticizing how I lost it. Then they said I was losing too fast (2 lbs a week). Then they said I'd lost too much weight. All this from the people who told me I gained too much weight when I was pregnant. Then I started believing them and gained it all back by eating unhealthy.

    This time, I'm happy to keep it mostly to myself. My kids keep talking about it. I have to be careful since they are young girls and I don't want them to have body image problems. My husband is quietly encouraging but not saying much (better safe than sorry). I told my mom I'd lost 20 lbs since I'd last seen her. My mom wishes she had a computer so she could use MFP, too. She is quietly encouraging and reminds me to keep eating healthy and not to overdue it when I indulge so I don't feel sick the next day. My best support system (outside of MFP) are the other "stay at home" moms who volunteer at the school. I was gushing about my iPhone one day and pointed out the great apps including MFP and they all noted the weight loss. A number of them are on MFP now as well. I plan to pat them on the back when they succeed and encourage them if they are frustrated. Otherwise, I plan to let them take their personal journey and discover what works for them.

    Enjoy the journey. Be proud of yourself and do what works best for you. Do this for yourself! Do this to have a long, healthy life! Trust the few who do encourage you in positive ways and try not to worry about the others.

    I agree that some may be afraid to say the wrong thing and offend you. They may be admiring from afar. My friends were.

    You are doing great.
  • cmriverside
    cmriverside Posts: 34,041 Member
    Options
    I don't lack self esteem. I just know I compliment EVERYBODY when I see that they look great - even if I don't know them that well. I just figure I'd like my turn!! LOL!!!!

    If you are complimenting them as a "payment" for a return compliment, that is not an attitude of service to others.


    Compliment them out of the sheer goodness of your heart, in an honest attempt to give them joy, and you will not care about the payback.


    Your position is like saying "I love you " just so the person will say "I love you" back.
  • tariana
    tariana Posts: 4 Member
    Options
    Well, I think it hurts more when you are for two weeks counting calories and killing yourself on a treadmill, then your grandpa come to you and say: "you are doing a lot of exercises but your belly seems to be bigger."
    That really kills your motivation to keep on diet and exercising!
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    Options
    I don't lack self esteem. I just know I compliment EVERYBODY when I see that they look great - even if I don't know them that well. I just figure I'd like my turn!! LOL!!!!

    If you are complimenting them as a "payment" for a return compliment, that is not an attitude of service to others.


    Compliment them out of the sheer goodness of your heart, in an honest attempt to give them joy, and you will not care about the payback.


    Your position is like saying "I love you " just so the person will say "I love you" back.

    I compliment folks when I think they deserve/need it. I am not motivated to receive a compliment because I say nice things to people. I say nice things because I'm a nice person. It was a joke.
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    Options
    I had my hair cut into bangs. Took two days till I said I CUT MY BANGS! LOOK!
    Meh. Then they were all noticing. So just tell them I LOST WEIGHT! Don't I look fabulous!? Then bask in the compliments.
    :)

    LOL!! Too funny!! I got hair extensions a couple months ago...My customers were looking at me like "what's different??"...Thank GOD my stylist is a miracle worker and noone can tell my hair is, well, not mine!! LOL!! Can't quite figure out how they didn't notice that I'd gained 10 -12 inches overnight....LOL!!
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    Options
    What hurts my feelings are the "you're too skinny" comments or the "come on.... just a few girl scout cookies won't hurt... you are being too obsessive..."

    I feel like I'm in better shape than ever yet what am I getting... criticism and attempts at sabatoge... gee thanks.

    UGHHHHH...Well, all I have to say is that if that is really u on your profile, then WOW!!!! Just WOW!!!
  • deathtaco
    deathtaco Posts: 237
    Options
    When I post up progress pics, people comment on how pale I am, how small I am, how stupid I look or some other bull**** comment.

    So I say F em, and keep lifting. No one gives 2 cents about how I look, how low my BF% is or how much effort I put in. So I stopped caring about all the negativity and lift for myself. I'll never be good enough for myself, and I'm ok with that - cause I'll look better than the *kitten* commenting how dumb I am for not going out drinking, or look better pale than the idiots with tans.

    ...but yeah, sucks that all my hard work seemingly goes unnoticed.
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    Options
    Sometimes, (not always) they are afraid to say it, because if I say "Oh you look so good, have you lost weight?", it could potentially be misinterpreted as "Oh you used to be so fat!" So rather than risk that, most people say nothing.

    It does hurt my feelings, too though...

    Guess i should have also mentioned who I was talking about is my customers - mostly male. So, u could have a really good point here! Thanks!
  • Jenn070608
    Jenn070608 Posts: 206 Member
    Options
    I have had a few negative comments about my weight loss. So, I would prefer people said nothing than something hurtful.
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    Options
    You know everybody can see that you have lost weight, but most refuse to acknowledge. Does that hurt your feelings?

    YES!!! It also hurts when someone ask how you are doing and you tell them about the progress you made...24lbs gone, 10.5 inches melted off and they say... "huh, I hadn't noticed".

    Now, that's just mean. Alittle like implying I have low self esteem or I want compliments because I give them...LOL....
  • pinkgigi
    pinkgigi Posts: 693 Member
    Options
    I haven't had any comments this time at all, but I'm not looking for them. I have only myself to support me, and that is fine. That's why I get so much out of this community, thanks guys!

    GG
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    Options
    Well, I think it hurts more when you are for two weeks counting calories and killing yourself on a treadmill, then your grandpa come to you and say: "you are doing a lot of exercises but your belly seems to be bigger."
    That really kills your motivation to keep on diet and exercising!

    Mean. Keep goin' honey!!
  • Nailrep
    Nailrep Posts: 966 Member
    Options
    When I post up progress pics, people comment on how pale I am, how small I am, how stupid I look or some other bull**** comment.

    So I say F em, and keep lifting. No one gives 2 cents about how I look, how low my BF% is or how much effort I put in. So I stopped caring about all the negativity and lift for myself. I'll never be good enough for myself, and I'm ok with that - cause I'll look better than the *kitten* commenting how dumb I am for not going out drinking, or look better pale than the idiots with tans.

    ...but yeah, sucks that all my hard work seemingly goes unnoticed.

    Yeah, I am my own worst critic too. You look great! Keep doing whatever you are doing! It's working! My oldest son worries about being too small. But I tell him people who look like him are models! He's beautiful! (probably rather hear the word handsome, but hey, I'm his mom!)
  • mrogers52
    mrogers52 Posts: 378 Member
    Options
    No it doesn't! I enjoy it when people notice, but it isn't about what anyone else thinks except me! I like to explain that I am exercising and what I do. I also mention that I am counting calories, but most of all, I am getting healthy!:flowerforyou:
  • dustyhockeymom
    dustyhockeymom Posts: 537 Member
    Options
    Of course I like it when anyone compliments me, and a few people have noticed recently. However, unless they are my close friends I actually prefer not to talk about it. I think because for so long it was an uncomfortable topic that I tend to avoid.
  • dhiggins8
    dhiggins8 Posts: 466 Member
    Options
    Actually I have people asking me if I am sick when I tell them no they ask how I am loosing my weight

Categories