so so discouraged..

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AshleyXoBebeXo
AshleyXoBebeXo Posts: 31
in Motivation and Support
i been working out and watching what i been eating for a while now.. so i thought im gonna order a dress from avon since my mom is a rep. so i got the dress today and i was so excited to try it on. i get it on and i get it zipped up to about half my chest.. then it wouldnt zip rest of the way.. now you think id be upset that i wasted money.. but im more upset it didnt fit.. its just a few more inches and it would of it.. and it just upsets me so bad.. its like a little inside defete.

i always have had issues with clothes not fitting right. it might be really right in one area and loose in another.. it just really saddens me.. i just want to be happy with my body.. wear what i want to wear.. without it being so tight tha ti cant breath. i just ferel like im the biggest one out of all my friends.. i feel like im always competing with someone. i feel like if i was smaller a guy would actually care for me.. and i could find love. idk its just me rambling.. i need support... i know i sound so emo right now but its really getting me down and i feel like i cant talk to any of my friends or like my mom or anything because they wont understand

Replies

  • MsRobin_TheSequel
    MsRobin_TheSequel Posts: 127 Member
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    Aw sweetie! You are already beautiful. Take another look at your picture...

    Take you some baby steps, don't go chasing happiness or love. You can't find it. It has to find you.

    One day at a time, use MFP for support, motivation. Log everything. Get in your exercise. You can do this!!!
  • amylynn9
    amylynn9 Posts: 40
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    You can now use the dress as motivation! I ordered a Victoria's Secret bathing suit in a top and bottom both size mediums. Now i wear a large/xl (normally) and awesome enough, i got them today and they fit, but I could lose a few more inches. Instead of getting sad, fuel your motivation :)
  • Dellonious1
    Dellonious1 Posts: 209
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    Ashley, It could be the dress. I can buy a shirt at 1 store and buy another shirt the same size at a different store and only one fits me.. Drives me buggy when that happens..
  • Losingitin2011
    Losingitin2011 Posts: 572 Member
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    I totally understand that. I am terrified of going dress shopping for my graduation because I don't want to get depressed when something doesn't fit, so much so that I'd rather have a dress that is too big than risk the defeated feeling when something doesn't fit right. I am a very..... busty.... girl so most things that *should* fit, usually don't.

    You are absolutely gorgeous! Remind yourself that where you are right now is just a transition to where you're going. It's a stop on the route. You will get there, and that dress will fit and look smashing on you!
  • Aesop101
    Aesop101 Posts: 758 Member
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    You're beautiful!

    I wouldn't let a dress determine anything. I pulled out a pair of 46 shorts last week that I bought about 5 years ago and they still had the price tag on them. Guess what, they fit!

    So hang that dress up, hit the exercise trail and try it back on in about 2 weeks.
  • Christine1110
    Christine1110 Posts: 1,786 Member
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    I found love 22 years ago when I was heavy....my hubby doesn't care if I lose weight or not. He supports me in my journey, but says he loves me for me. I think that is what love is all about. Don't give up on your weight...it just takes time. It is a life change.
  • AshleyXoBebeXo
    AshleyXoBebeXo Posts: 31
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    reading all your comments seriously made me so happy and feel so much better.. i been crying(sadly its lame i know) for like the last hour about this.. because i felt so fat and yucky.. i understand weight loss is a process and i shouldnt rush it.. its just really hard to remember that sometimes when you have these kinds of set backs.. i keep reading what you guys wrote because its the only thing keeping me happy and motivated about everything.
  • smartin0619
    smartin0619 Posts: 36 Member
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    I agree, use the dress for motivation! Weight loss is a journeye, it takes time and patience. I have always struggled with my weight and am currently at my heaviest I've ever been! It is very tough to look in the mirror and not like what you see, we tend to be our worst critics. You are beautiful and have so much time for a man...later in life ;) Focus on you and making yourself happy first! Have you thought about changing up your exercise plan?
  • AshleyXoBebeXo
    AshleyXoBebeXo Posts: 31
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    i also feel like everyone says " love will come to you when your ready" i just feel like/.. HEY IM READY NOW! haha but i cant rush it you guys are right.. and someone will love me for me.. not what i look like
  • Heather75
    Heather75 Posts: 3,386 Member
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    I didn't know Avon sold clothes.

    Not the point, I know. You look great.
  • AshleyXoBebeXo
    AshleyXoBebeXo Posts: 31
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    I agree, use the dress for motivation! Weight loss is a journeye, it takes time and patience. I have always struggled with my weight and am currently at my heaviest I've ever been! It is very tough to look in the mirror and not like what you see, we tend to be our worst critics. You are beautiful and have so much time for a man...later in life ;) Focus on you and making yourself happy first! Have you thought about changing up your exercise plan?


    i have thought of changing it.. i feel like i need to do more cardio then anything.. and i feel like i make excuses for myself like.."im so tired" and "i dont feel like it" and i really need to get rid of that thinking..
  • AshleyXoBebeXo
    AshleyXoBebeXo Posts: 31
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    I didn't know Avon sold clothes.

    Not the point, I know. You look great.

    they sell really cute clothes ahah, but thank you:)
  • Shandke
    Shandke Posts: 116 Member
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    Aww. Look at you....you are beautiful! Beauty really doesn't have much to do with our bodies or weight....it's all in your attitude! While we all have things we don't like about our bodies, the goal is to also see the good and keep working on those other areas! Know that it doesn't matter the size the dress says......it's the way you can "rock" the look in one that fits you.....NO one can wear everything and make it look right! Key is to find something that makes you feel and look great! I know it's hard to find, but don linger on sizes those vary more than you can imagine! Just keep working at those areas and find things you feel good in and "own" it! It sure looks like you can do that! Keep your cute little chin up and hang out here for support when you need it!

    Good luck!
  • smartin0619
    smartin0619 Posts: 36 Member
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    I agree, use the dress for motivation! Weight loss is a journeye, it takes time and patience. I have always struggled with my weight and am currently at my heaviest I've ever been! It is very tough to look in the mirror and not like what you see, we tend to be our worst critics. You are beautiful and have so much time for a man...later in life ;) Focus on you and making yourself happy first! Have you thought about changing up your exercise plan?


    i have thought of changing it.. i feel like i need to do more cardio then anything.. and i feel like i make excuses for myself like.."im so tired" and "i dont feel like it" and i really need to get rid of that thinking..

    That is tough! I feel like we think similarily! I struggle with that too and it's hard not to think that way. I just try to think of how I will feel after the work out. It is so rewarding and I like to sweat during my workouts. When I was in my best shape ever I would do 25 mins of cardio and 45 mins of strength training for my workouts. ( for strength I would do upper body one day, lower one day and then total body one day). I found it helpful to have my exercise plan written down before hand to, I was one of those people you see at the gym walking around with a piece of paper tracking down my workouts/progress. of course it is easier said then done, hopefully you are finding some helpful tips and motivation! :flowerforyou:
  • rharris86dc
    rharris86dc Posts: 635 Member
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    Don't be discouraged!! No joke, I have a very similar problem with dresses, but not b/c of my fat anymore, but because my boobs are big!

    And from your pictures, it looks like that may well be at least part of the problem, lol. You are GORGEOUS, so don't let a dress size get you down. LIke others have said, use it as motivation!!
  • bonjour24
    bonjour24 Posts: 1,119 Member
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    i think that clothes are all made differently- i can be a size (UK) 14 in one place, 16 in another, 20 in another. i buy things that fit fine at the waist that won't go over my thighs, or boobs. that is just life. and i can't wear anything that buttons over the boobs (apart from mens shirts).

    but the main thing i wanted to say is that you need to learn to be happy with yourself. you may not like the few extra pounds you say you're carrying, but if you don't love yourself who will? i used to get so upset about my weight- i've always been big, and i don't think i'll ever be skinny- it's just how i'm made. i was always the biggest (and shortest!). i used to get so down. but then one morning i just woke up and came to the realisation that life is too short to hate the only person that's ever really got your back. and i was tired of being sad. i didn't think of dieting at the time (duh!), but i did start to like me more and be better to myself. then my confidence grew, and i got more interest from guys. now i'm happily married with 3 kids.

    all i'm saying is that you've only got one body. regardless of whether it's huge or tiny, you've got to love it. you may not like bits of it, but don't let it take over your life or mood.
    besides, is anyone ever truly happy with what they were given anyway?

    my sister's 5'10" with amazing gravity defying boobs and an *kitten* that sits right under her shoulderblades! and she still whinges about her thighs and her moustache!

    just love what you have and like who you are. because what happens when you get to goal and you still feel the same?

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