Looking for those battling anorexia

This may be of some help:

http://myfitnesspal.desk.com/customer/portal/articles/1575987-eating-disorder-resources

With regards to the family doctor...is the doctor that busy that they cannot fit in what should be an urgent appointment? Does the person making the appointment know the issue?

Hi there
My family encouraged me to seek treatment for Anorexia roughly 10 months ago. The first thing I recommend (and was suggested to me) was to see my GP and ask for a referral to see a clinical psychologist for an official diagnosis. My psychologist diagnosed me with AN and then we commenced the re-feeding and CBT treatment. My psychologist referred me to see a dietitian who specialized in ED cases who was able to develop a meal plan that was both comprehensive enough to put weight on quickly enough for my body to heal and also at a pace I could handle without completely freaking out. I was also placed on Lexapro to reduce ED related anxiety during the re-feeding process.

My psychologist also recommended a book to my Mum and partner which would make understanding my illness and caring for me easier, My mum really raved about it. It's called Skills-based Learning for Caring for a Loved One with an Eating Disorder (New Maudsley method written by Treasure, Smith and Crane

I wish your daughter and your family luck with her recovery. Just remember it will get much harder before it get's better and recovery isn't a straight journey, there are plenty of bumps along the road.

Also! I forgot to add, please please please do not let her wait till April the sooner you tackle this the better. If she has confided in you and you're slow to react, I can tell you from experience, it will feed her ED and since it's highly psychological, may cause her to try and prove how sick she really is (With further restriction/Purging etc)

linanneasley wrote: »

Hi fellow MFP folks. I am turning to those in this site who are currently battling/conquering Anorexia/bulimia. My 12 year old daughter has finally confessed to me that she has been starving and purging. She says for the last 2 years, I am certain for the last 4 months I've seen major red flags. I'll do what ever I have to in order for her to be healthy. She's gone from 98lbs to 85lbs. I called our family doctor and he can't see her until April. I can't wait that long. I need to get her into some kind of treatment now. Now that she and I have opened dialog about her situation I'm asking from you, what helped. Counseling? Dietician? I don't think she's so far into it that she requires long term facility treatment. Suggestions.

I highly recommend checking out aroundthedinnertable.com!
They are a group of amazing caregivers for those with eating disorders, who will never give up. The site is extremely active.

linanneasley wrote: »

Thanks everyone for your comments and concern. Of course at this point, since I live in a small community, no one will see her. They don't do either 'young people' or 'body image issues'. I'm now looking farther out of town for some qualified help. In the meantime she and I will go to the book store and start reading together.

You will need to travel to get her the help she needs ASAP. Living in a small community isn't an excuse. Your daughter needs help and she needs it now.

If you can afford it, I'd look into an inpatient program.

FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »

linanneasley wrote: »

Thanks everyone for your comments and concern. Of course at this point, since I live in a small community, no one will see her. They don't do either 'young people' or 'body image issues'. I'm now looking farther out of town for some qualified help. In the meantime she and I will go to the book store and start reading together.

You will need to travel to get her the help she needs ASAP. Living in a small community isn't an excuse. Your daughter needs help and she needs it now.

If you can afford it, I'd look into an inpatient program.

Maybe you should read the rest of the posts before offering your input. OP has updated us. But of course, your contributions always bring a special...um..."something" to the conversation.

OP, you're doing a great job. Don't give up and follow your instincts. You know your daughter best. Continue to educate yourself and advocate for her. You're the hero she needs. Best of luck to you.

linanneasley wrote: »

clyn27 wrote: »

I have no experience with this I just wanted to tell you, you sound like an amazing mother. As a mom myself I know how important and uplifting it is to be reminded that you are doing a good job during those hard times. So I am here to tell you that you are doing a great job, keep up the good work and know that you are doing an amazing job taking care of your daughter.

Thanks so much, I just burst into tears at work. I'm freaking out with guilt and self blame. She has seen the doctor and is now down to 79 lbs. And the want to put her on prozac, which scares the hell out of me. But in the mean time, how am I suppose to get her to eat? I'm reading everything i can find and trying not to push but gently encourage. The doctor showed her her BMI chart she went from 75% to 3%, and it didn't register as a concern with her. He hooked me up with 2 more doctors to further continue her treatment, but of course thats another 2 weeks, so in the meantime I'm going to keep her talking with the lady I found on my own, who seems to understand my panic. Thanks so much to you all for the support. I'm trying to keep this really close the the chest until I know fully what I'm dealing with and how much I should talk about it, I appreciate this form as a way to vent and just get some of it out.

@linanneasley‌ Prozac is an SSRI which are fairly safe when compared to TCAs. Eating disorders are a complex disease because they have both psychological and physical components. Prozac is an anti-depressant but has been used to treat anorexia because it usually increases weight and improves mood. So it helps the physical components of anorexia. Whether it helps the actual anorexia behaviors/thoughts (psychological component) is dependent upon the patient taking the medication.

Give it a shot. It may help her.

Some_Watery_Tart wrote: »

FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »

Some_Watery_Tart wrote: »

FatFreeFrolicking wrote: »

linanneasley wrote: »

Thanks everyone for your comments and concern. Of course at this point, since I live in a small community, no one will see her. They don't do either 'young people' or 'body image issues'. I'm now looking farther out of town for some qualified help. In the meantime she and I will go to the book store and start reading together.

You will need to travel to get her the help she needs ASAP. Living in a small community isn't an excuse. Your daughter needs help and she needs it now.

If you can afford it, I'd look into an inpatient program.

Maybe you should read the rest of the posts before offering your input. OP has updated us. But of course, your contributions always bring a special...um..."something" to the conversation.

OP, you're doing a great job. Don't give up and follow your instincts. You know your daughter best. Continue to educate yourself and advocate for her. You're the hero she needs. Best of luck to you.

@Some_Watery_Tart‌ Excuse me?

If something I said was already repeated or the OP addressed it, my bad. I'm busy and don't always have the time to read through an entire thread.

Mental health facilities/treatment programs are scarce. Telling her that she will have to travel to get her daughter help is true. Saying she should look into inpatient programs is a good idea. So I'm not quite sure why you are being rude or giving me 'tude.

You know what they say… Unless you have something nice to say…..

Aw, there's that special "something" I mentioned.

I'm sorry you don't have time to read through 11 posts, but somehow have time to offer over 3400 comments to this forum. Perhaps, it is important to read through all of the posts (or all of the post by the OP, at least) before offering input on such a serious topic?

My comment was directed toward the fact that if you'd read *2 more comments*, you would have see that OP was successful in getting her daughter seen and has continued to aggressively advocate for her daughter. She made no excuses. She merely told us her situation. I found the tone of your reply, especially your statement "living in a small community is not an excuse", to be snarky given the OP's comments thus far.

Perhaps you might take a second look at how you present your opinion before hitting "post reply"? Because I certainly took what you said as critical toward the OP, and therefore offered my feedback on that.

OP, I won't derail the topic any further by continuing this side discussion. As the child of an anorexic, I understand your struggles and wish I could offer better insight. You do, however, have all my sympathies and best wishes for a full recovery for your daughter.

@Some_Watery_Tart‌ LOL. Pot meet kettle.

I'm honored you stalk me and know me so well. I can't say I've ever noticed you before. Since you follow me around so closely here, you should know I haven't posted in the forums in a while because I am busy with school, VP of PHS at my university, two jobs, internships, volunteering, etc. When I was very active in the forums, I didn't have as many commitments.

This is the internet. You cannot read emotion. So do not try to put an emotion on my comments.

But since you want to attack me… Your comments to me have been far from pleasant.

Hello , I'm also recovering from three years of anorexia . I am using P90X currently for muscle gain and increasing calories from 1800 ( baseline ) . Feel free to add .

http://forum.graceonthemoon.com/forums/forum.php?s=244d7f60d3779fe812a87196bb5e6821

Eating disorders are purely psychological. I suggest you check out the resources above and continue her treatment. Do not let this go! I have seen so many girls lie about being "recovered" using heavy objects and weights at weigh-ins and continue to restrict.

I believe the basis for the disorder is not founded in reality and therefore simply "educating" her on nutrition from a dietician, GP, etc. isn't likely to help. A counselor/psychologist who specializes in this area is best!

Additionally, i don't suggest any support groups (or putting those who are not seriously interested in recovery yet together). Best to have one on one sessions.

It's important that you're there for her as well as everyone in her immediate family. When i dealt with an eating disorder in my teens I received little attention or affection for my efforts (starving myself) and this fueled me to get thinner and thinner. I desperately needed control over my life and was in an unstable environment. This was a power-game. Positive reinforcement (NOT punishment), acceptance, and non-judgement is key here!

Eating disorders can be deadly, so no matter how difficult it may be, stay strong and be ready to FIGHT!

maggieramee wrote: »

I'm 16 years old and was just recently diagnosed with anorexia. I have been being treated for 3 months. The treatment from doctors hasn't helped me much. What is really helping is aggressiveness from my family. At first my mom was timid about the ordeal, and she didn't want to hurt my feelings or make me think it was my fault (it's a disease, it's not the person's fault). However, my psychologist said that this just fueled it and made me think it was okay. I got worse. My mom and I then started coming to classes that my clinic provides together, and it teaches parents how to monitor and take care of their kids battling anorexia. Now, she grounds me when I don't eat, counts my calories, makes me eat in front of her so she knows I'm not lying, and sometimes forces food into me if I refuse it. It's stressful and a difficult thing to go through, but I've gained weight and am getting healthier. Your mother-daughter relationship will be tested, but if you're there for her in the long run, then this will only be beneficial. It may not be fun for you or your daughter, but if you want fast results, be extremely forceful and diligent about watching what she eats.

When you finally get to see your doctor, ask if they have treatment classes or clinics that involve both you and your daughter to make sure she's not going through this alone. Best of luck to both of you.

I can't offer much advice, as I've never struggled with an eating disorder personally - but I have friends who have overcome eating disorders, and I've studied eating disorders extensively on my own. However, maggieramee just offered you some awesome advice (along with everyone else who has responded so far). Like I said, I've never had an ED before, but I've overcome self-confidence issues and short-term depression. During those few months of my fight, my family was my rock - especially my mom - even after I started talking to a counselor. So I agree with Maggie's suggestion that you should try to find a clinical program that "involves both you and your daughter."

Also, if you want to gain more insight into how a person with an ED thinks, I highly recommend reading the book Wintergirls by Laurie Halse Anderson. Although the book is fictional, it is very realistic. One word of caution though: read it before you allow your daughter to read it (if she is ever allowed to read it/feels comfortable reading it after a full recovery). Because the main character struggles with anorexia, the book can be extremely triggering for a reader who is currently battling or has struggled with anorexia.

That's a shame about her doctor. Nobody likes to be railroaded, and of course she shut down. People with anorexia tend to be especially reluctant to hand over control, and he should have attempted to earn trust before asserting himself.

I have another type of anorexia (stress-induced). But like your daughter, I don't like handing over control. She'll probably only listen to those who earnestly listen and have her best interest at heart. Moms are great for that--that's why I'm here!

I'm trying to gain 5-10lbs, but the idea of gaining any weight is probably really scary for your daughter. I would tell her, "We're not trying to make you fat. We want you to love your body. You don't have to get a muffin top or belly rolls if you don't want to. At over 100 lbs, you can have a slim, firm, beautiful physique."

A toned, firm 105-120 looks way better than a weak, saggy 75-95. Trust me! I've done both. And, for future reference, I have better luck with guys at 100 or above.

I do not have any experience with EDs, but I do have a daughter. I would do anything for her, as I know you would for your daughter. I just wanted to wish you both good luck and good health!

xoxo