A short rant about many of the posts I have been seeing here. May come off as harsh but must be said
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While I don't disagree with what's said, we all see the same things on here:
"i can't lose weight because..."
"i can't even manage to eat 1200 calories. help me!"
ETA: For every post related to the above issues there will be 50% witty, enlightened and vocal "get over its" and 40% wishy wash "you can do its" and 10% fairly offbeat replies :P
OP has not made a groundbreaking discovery and the adult thing for him to do is to just sit down with a nice jar of MYOB and focus on himself. Sometimes people have to make the mistakes and go through some self discovery before they can get to the right mindset.
Let the people post.
Those who wan't to read will read.
Those who wish to respond will. Those who don't, won't.
Just like this post. I could have read and moved on with my day, nothing other than my own desire for entertainment has compelled me to reply :P
I should note, that contrary to OP, I AM a special snowflake. So take that!0 -
judiness101 wrote: »I'm sorry to hijack the thread, but anybody knows a good thread where people told their denial/excuses/fatlogic stories? I used the search fonction, but I came out with way too many result.
I do find it fascinating what excuses we give ourselves and how we do not see ourselves as really fat when we clearly are. I feel fatter today with a bmi of 28 than when I had one of 36.
I think one was called "To all the mean people on MFP".0 -
Wow, someone has a lot of growing up to do. Because you gained weight and lost it all once does not mean you will maintain that for the rest of your life. Nor does that mean that illness, commitments and other life challenges such as grief, depression, disability will not come and bite you in the *kitten* in the future which will inevitably impact on the time you have to dedicate to maintaining a healthy weight. You perhaps should feel blessed that you have been given the opportunities in life that you have. While you have had to work hard for these opportunities many people will never even come close due to their individual set of circumstances. While generally I agree that most of us should just 'get on with it', life is not that simple. People come on here to be supported whatever their personal goals. If you dont like a whining post just scroll on. And for the record tough love rarely works for anyone. The only person that will 'help' a person to change for the better is themselves...if you want to be supportive while they do that motivate or inspire them....dont belittle them and their efforts.0
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I meant it as a phrase not a statistic. You know, like how you say you're 99% sure of something? You cant literally have done the maths to work it out, its a phrase.0
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joejward95 wrote: »I am happy for people to hate me for what i have said. What I wont have is people accusing me of things I have/haven't done, telling me I don't know anything because I am too young and telling me my life has been easy(without knowing a thing about me)
You realize you are taking personally things that strangers on the internet are saying.
You made a statement, if that's what you believe, stick to it. People are going to judge you no matter what you say in response. Be confident in who you are and let what they say roll off your back. Otherwise you are going to drive yourself bonkers.
Just like excuses are like a**holes, opinions are as well- everyone has them!
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give me one of those cookies! and for the love of God people:
Loose
Loose is an adjective, the opposite of tight or contained.
My shoes are loose
I have a loose tooth
There’s a dog running loose in the street
Lose
Lose is a verb that means to suffer the loss of, to miss.
I win! You lose!
Don’t lose your keys
I never lose bets
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EvgeniZyntx wrote: »joejward95 wrote: »EvgeniZyntx.... look at her later post.She did claim that it was likely she wouldn't lose weight if she didnt intake any calories for 2 weeks. A physical impossibility .
She wrote:
"quite possibly"
<--- this little smiley should tell you something.
It's still remains she's pretty much at the lower limit of calorie restriction and the best advice is to attempt to get her condition under control and NOT to restrict further which may lead to disordered eating habits or further hormonal issues.
Re-reading her post she isn't making a claim of physical impossibility. She's saying eating "nothing" isn't making her lose weight. Her "nothing" doesn't mean 0 cals. It means long term ~900 net...
What would you advise her? Hint: eat less, workout more aren't the right answer.
Thanks for having my back.
To OP---Of course you have to restrict calories and work out. I do that. I am saying that you can take one person who is 5'7" and they will eat 1200 calories and plus work out and another person who is 5'7" and they will do the same exact thing and will lose more or less (or not at all) depending on a lot of factors.
I have never been fat. I don't want to get there---I work hard to maintain and I am hopeful that when I have everything worked out (medications and the right macros) I will be successful in losing a little bit.
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Delivery for me is awful, i couldnt care less the age or sex of the poster, but content is correct.
This part of the post I absolutely detest.
Tl;dr: Stop whining and take responsibility for your weight loss. You're a grown adult, deal with it like one. Show some self control, and if you can't then you don't deserve to be in shape. Your body will react to how you treat it.Lack self control? You're going to be fat and deserve to be like that.
Whining for me is part of the journey for me. And if it was just a matter of being a grown adult, loads of people wouldnt have got big in the first place.
if you dont like the whining close the posts.
p.s I am not angry, not hungry, just my opinion. infact you sound angry.0 -
joejward95 wrote: »No, I am saying that hardships in life have nothing to do with weightloss. My hardships are none of your business, yours are none of mine. Because it is irrelevant to weight.
doesnt hardships play a part in how smooth it is for a person to succeed or not?
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OP, hormones are more powerful than willpower. If you have some time, do some research on insulin resistance, especially the work of Dr. Robert Lustig.
I happen to agree with you that weight is 90% diet, I just disagree with the idea that it is 100% calories in vs calories out. It has more to do with the type of calories you take in rather than the amount.
Oh, and I'm not using this as an excuse for anything, as I have never been overweight, so I have nothing to make excuses for. I'm just asking that you take a look at some of the current research about hormones and weight before making up your mind about what you think.
que the CICO non believers..
sorry weight loss is 100% CICO ..even if you have a medical condition you just need medicine to regulate the "out" side...0 -
herrspoons wrote: »derkin2005 wrote: »
I hit target weight over a year ago I still track to maintain...pretty *kitten* weird I know.herrspoons wrote: »AmandaHugginkiss wrote: »herrspoons wrote: »AmandaHugginkiss wrote: »herrspoons wrote: »AmandaHugginkiss wrote: »herrspoons wrote: »I mean, dear god. Do most of you think that having 20 or 30 years more 'life experience' makes you any more qualified to give advice? All it means is that you've made consistently bad choices for 20 or 30 more years. That's why you're here in the first place.
You can cry about the bluntness of the delivery. You can whine about your inability to keep your hand out of the cookie jar. You can spend hours looking for every medical ailment or fringe scientific study that gives you a reason as to why you're failing... and you still won't change the basic laws of physiology and energy conservation.
I'm looking at the replies and seeing a sea of failure, and I'm finally understanding why we have an obesity problem and why most people put the weight back on.
Cookies? Where can I find this jar of which you speak?
I could totally go for a cookie about now.
In the jar. Unless you've eaten them all because willpower is a foreign concept to you.
Totally foreign. Clearly.
Sweet. See you next year then!
Well, I won't, but you get the point.
Oh, you're leaving then? Send us a post card.
Or don't.
Of course I'll be leaving when I hit target weight. Why on earth would I hang round a weight loss forum when I have no need to? That's just weird.
That's cool, but what does tracking have to do with posting on a weight loss forum?
Look, before we get into the realms of ridiculousness, I just find it silly that people are having a pop at the OP because he's 18, as if he should not express an opinion because he's too young, or doesn't have enough life experience to understand his topic.
But here's the thing: everything he says is correct and the topic clearly states that:
1) It's a rant
2) It may come off as harsh
Why then the butthurt? No one is obliged to read it, and if they do so they shouldn't complain that the topic was... err... a rant and a harsh one at that.
If someone could provide an argument that refuted his points, then that's fine. But all I'm seeing are people either saying he's too young to understand his subject matter (which is blatantly false) or that he needs to consider peoples' sensitivities, when the title of the topic clearly states it isn't a 'dem feels' kind of topic.
Caveat emptor. Don't complain if something turns out to be what it said it would be.
You. I like.0 -
joejward95 wrote: »I am happy for people to hate me for what i have said. What I wont have is people accusing me of things I have/haven't done, telling me I don't know anything because I am too young and telling me my life has been easy(without knowing a thing about me)
The thing is that assuming everyone who mentions their problems with weight loss, hormones, mental illness and what not, is using them as excuses and looking for self-justification and not, say, looking for more customized advice, *is* "accusing ... of things [they] have/haven't done".
I am losing successfully with just calorie counting and exercise despite (minor in my case) endocrine issues and mental obstacles, but I also know that the fact it worked for me is not proof it must work for everyone else without tweaks and the fact that I succeeded so far and they didn't does not make them lazy and whiny. Super basic fact from formal logic: you can not prove a positive statement about "Every X..." by example.
And assuming that disagree with you = hate you... Really, now...
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Having had a great deal more experience at being an adult makes people understand life in general better than you. Just FYI.joejward95 wrote: »I love these people responding about my age! Is this really the only thing yo can say to discredit me? Does you being older somehow make you understand weight loss better than me?
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The problem with thyroid disorders is that they alter your metabolic rate, and thyroid disease is difficult to manage. This is especially true for people trying to lose weight. Why? Because weight loss, reduction in caloric intake, and increased physical activity all alter the bodies need for and production of thyroid stimulating hormone. Do you think it would be easy for you to lose weight if your TDEE changed fairly drastically on a weekly or daily basis?
Having a thyroid imbalance means your caloric needs are not easy to figure out. You can't just plug in your height and weight in a calculator and get an accurate spit out of what you should be taking in. What works one month, may no longer be right the next month, as thyroid levels are continually adjusting. For the last 6 months I've had an overactive thyroid, because my body was adjusting to my new weight and activity level, and producing more of its own hormone. You don't get to check your thyroid levels every day. You have no way of knowing if you are too high or too low unless you are expressing symptoms, and even then, usually insurance only lets you have a thyroid check every so many weeks or months.
That is where the difficulty comes from. If you have no sympathy for the hurdles that people with chronic disease need to overcome in order to lose weight successfully, fine, just say that.
As someone with an array of metabolic disorders I know both how difficult it is, and that it can be done with dedication and motivation. More than anything, I have struggled with trying to balance my blood sugar with my caloric needs. As I come off diabetic medications, I have struggled with low blood sugar and the frustration of needing to eat even when I don't want to or technically can't fit it into my calories for the day.
Your struggles are not universal.0 -
justsayinisall wrote: »give me one of those cookies! and for the love of God people:
Loose
Loose is an adjective, the opposite of tight or contained.
My shoes are loose
I have a loose tooth
There’s a dog running loose in the street
Lose
Lose is a verb that means to suffer the loss of, to miss.
I win! You lose!
Don’t lose your keys
I never lose bets
THANK YOU! My grammar nazi is nearly uncontrollable when I see the misuse of these two words.0 -
I know I shared this via PM, but thought I would post it here too. If easily offended I recommend skipping this post.
People get defensive and and try to nit pick at you (due to your age) because you refuse to enable them. How dare you try and take away excuses about why it is not their fault. Heaven forbid you suggest personal responsibility people get all riled up and you are suddenly a "mean" person both here and in the real world. This does not just apply to weightloss but to pretty much all areas of life. Are there some exceptions? Sure, but they are the minority. Most people who have excuse after excuse are really just looking for people to pat them on the head and say "there there, it's not your fault".
Half the excuses people use- I've been there, done that. Truth is, I was the one who gained the 140 lbs, no one else. Medications? Yeah- I take 3 that all list weight gain as side effects. Life events? Yep- lost my fiancé at age 23 and a history of an eating disorder. Crazy schedule? I'm a medic in NYC who is taking graduate classes on my days off. On top of that my food choices are limited because of anaphylactic allergies to wheat, barley, oat and gluten. Yet I'm still losing 1.5-2.5 lbs per week. The difference? I owned up to what really caused my weight gain- me. I was the one who over ate for years and wound up needing to lose 140 lbs- no one else.
I am sure many people are going to be upset with this post but ask yourself why does it make you so upset? Because deep down you know it is true?
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herrspoons wrote: »Every single one of you who disagreed with the OP's post is going to fail. Every single one of you. Maybe not now, but in a year or so's time when you put the weight back on.
All of you.
Oh, I don't disagree with him, but... youth. Gotta love it.
Remember when you knew everything too?
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joejward95 wrote: »No, I am saying that hardships in life have nothing to do with weightloss. My hardships are none of your business, yours are none of mine. Because it is irrelevant to weight.
Is it now?
Hmm, are you saying that it is irrelevant to consider how someone's financial, educational or mental state might influence their behaviour and choices? And that addressing the presnece of clinical depression, for example, might just, maybe, be relevant to long term adherence in a weight loss program?
Oh, wait!
I have a friend, she's been paralyzed from the waist down from an infection a few years ago. The resulting trauma impacted her ability to exercise and along with mental issues, other concomitant metabolic issues, overeating, etc. she's gained a lot of weight. Her hardships are irrelevant to the weight gain?
Okay!
I'll send her a postcard to harden the eff up!
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I appreciate the OP's point of view on this. In a sense he's right. I'm new here and lurk around the threads because I just don't want to get caught up in the differences of opinions here. I love his honesty. For me, what he said was true. I had to get up off my *kitten* and try to make things happen. I was one of those folks that made excuses about why I couldn't/wouldn't work out. I had time to watch reality TV and other crap, but didn't have time to work out, or go for a walk. Honestly, I was just being lazy. I mean, I've been on this site - trying to change my habits/lifestyle slowly for about 6 weeks now. I have a very long way to go. It took me about 5 weeks of just coming here, counting calories and logging what I was eating before I got motivated enough to even start trying to work out beyond playing my Wii. My goal is to try to walk 2 miles after work on Monday, Wednesday & Friday, and walk 10K steps on those days and on Saturdays when I am out shopping and running errands. I finally got to the point to where I want it, so I understand what he was saying.
I don't think his post was aimed at everyone and I think the tone of his post is what is upsetting people. With that being said, in my case he was right. I just needed to take control and make this a priority. I'm hoping the OP can remain motivated and continue this mindset throughout his life.0 -
justsayinisall wrote: »give me one of those cookies! and for the love of God people:
Loose
Loose is an adjective, the opposite of tight or contained.
My shoes are loose
I have a loose tooth
There’s a dog running loose in the street
Lose
Lose is a verb that means to suffer the loss of, to miss.
I win! You lose!
Don’t lose your keys
I never lose bets
THANK YOU! My grammar nazi is nearly uncontrollable when I see the misuse of these two words.
My inner usage nazi gets out of control when people call usage errors grammar errors.0 -
joejward95 wrote: »I meant it as a phrase not a statistic. You know, like how you say you're 99% sure of something? You cant literally have done the maths to work it out, its a phrase.
There is this little thing called the quote button. It might help when responding to people.
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I agree with the OP...he didn't say it was easy so I'm not sure why people are implying that. He said that people are responsible for their own success (if a little harshly put!) Yes, people do better with motivation from others and yes, circumstances like health and life dramas make it harder, but when it comes down to it, it's up to no one else other than the individual to succeed.0
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ditsyblond17 wrote: »judiness101 wrote: »Wow, you just solved the obesity epidemic. Congratulations!
Haha, I was gonna say the same thing. Congrats on having the easiest time losing weight, OP. WOULD YOU LIKE AN AWARD? most of us are on here for motivation and support. Harsh posts like this, deter people from posting anything. Sad really, because The people that need to the most are the ones that won't speak up because of stuff like this. Just know, it isn't as easy for everyone. Consider yourself lucky to not have a third shift job or thyroid disease, or hormonal imbalance. Congrats.
Well said!!!!
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the butthurt in this thread is amazing....0
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herrspoons wrote: »herrspoons wrote: »Every single one of you who disagreed with the OP's post is going to fail. Every single one of you. Maybe not now, but in a year or so's time when you put the weight back on.
All of you.
Except a lot of those are people disagreeing or pointing out the flaw in the way he said it rather than the fundamentals of what he said.
What flaw? Tell me anything in the original post that isn't true. It's not relevant if someone's feels are damaged. Christ, a lot of posters on this site could do with a good verbal slap. Maybe even a physical one.
While true, that slap might have more gravitas were the messenger someone with a little more experience under his belt.
Doesn't make Joe wrong. He's precious. I have a teenager of my own and was one once.
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herrspoons wrote: »Can anyone suffering from thyroid disorders or PCOS please state exactly why that, after effective medication and nutrient profile modification had been applied, CICO would not apply to them?
We understand these are tough medical conditions. Equally they are treatable.
My doctors cannot find the effective dosages of medication for me. But, I plug along with the calorie counting and exercise because they make me feel good and I know that once the proper dosage is reached, I will be able to lose weight. It is a lifestyle for me.0 -
Though this horse has been beaten to death, I totally agree with the OP. He also supplied ample warning of the contents of the post, then laid out the rant. Not everyone will respond favorably to his advice...big deal. We're all adults with free will, and have the ability to take away what we need from these posts. If there's nothing here that suits your needs, then move on to the next one and don't let it bother you. It's such a miserable existence to always be so easily offended, life's too short to waste on misguided anger.0
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judiness101 wrote: »I'm sorry to hijack the thread, but anybody knows a good thread where people told their denial/excuses/fatlogic stories? I used the search fonction, but I came out with way too many result.
I do find it fascinating what excuses we give ourselves and how we do not see ourselves as really fat when we clearly are. I feel fatter today with a bmi of 28 than when I had one of 36.
That is a great idea for a thread. You should start one.
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