invited by friends

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aahlight
aahlight Posts: 37
in Food and Nutrition
This evening we were invited to some friends for dinner..they made steak, salad, baked potatoes, carrots, I had a big salad..I had about 6oz of steak, one small baked potatoe..with the fixins...it was delicious..all the while trying to be very conscience of how many calories I am eating..it was horrible..after dinner they bring out the pies and ice cream, I did not eat them...they tried hard to get me to fall off the wagon..lets just say, If I were an alcoholic I would not want them around lol....that was horrible..in lieu of pie and crap I ate a oatmeal and chocolate bar..it was delicious...this "friend" is one that I met through a "fat lady group" that I started a couple years ago..and she just keeps coming around...its pretty tough..at first she did pretty good..now shes gained a lot of weight, and I really dont want to encourage her, cause she just isnt the type I wanna workout with....I feel so commited to her all the time, she is really needy...I am committed to myself right now...I can't deal....so to make a long story short..it was really hard to eat over at a friends...I havent really eaten out yet either....well see how that goes...

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  • aahlight
    aahlight Posts: 37
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    This evening we were invited to some friends for dinner..they made steak, salad, baked potatoes, carrots, I had a big salad..I had about 6oz of steak, one small baked potatoe..with the fixins...it was delicious..all the while trying to be very conscience of how many calories I am eating..it was horrible..after dinner they bring out the pies and ice cream, I did not eat them...they tried hard to get me to fall off the wagon..lets just say, If I were an alcoholic I would not want them around lol....that was horrible..in lieu of pie and crap I ate a oatmeal and chocolate bar..it was delicious...this "friend" is one that I met through a "fat lady group" that I started a couple years ago..and she just keeps coming around...its pretty tough..at first she did pretty good..now shes gained a lot of weight, and I really dont want to encourage her, cause she just isnt the type I wanna workout with....I feel so commited to her all the time, she is really needy...I am committed to myself right now...I can't deal....so to make a long story short..it was really hard to eat over at a friends...I havent really eaten out yet either....well see how that goes...
  • icandoit
    icandoit Posts: 4,163 Member
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    Welcome. You can do this. We are all here for you:flowerforyou:
  • joanne123
    joanne123 Posts: 69
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    wow what a challenge. Yeah, you don't need friends who are going to tempt you from your mission.:noway: Stay home and talk to people here next time, with a hearty and healthy meal then dance around with pride when you see that number change on the progress box! :flowerforyou:
  • martiboy
    martiboy Posts: 13
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    WOW..you did good!!!! I would have fallen when the pies came out. I stay away from "friends" who are trying to sabotage my diet. Keep up the good work:flowerforyou:
  • rheston
    rheston Posts: 638
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    Sounds like your friend needs company eating herself into extinction while you need friends who are there to help you eat yourself into existence. These are not easy things to pair together so your willpower is all you have when you're alone with your friend -- keep up the good work and hang in there because like others have said that's what we're all here for.:wink:
  • lotusfromthemud
    lotusfromthemud Posts: 5,335 Member
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    In the recovery community, these people are called "enablers".

    They are dangerous. If this is a friendship you really value, you may have to have a hard, but straightforward conversation about your new eating habit.

    If this is not a friendship you value, you might consider distancing yourself from this person. It's hard to be selfish, but you're on the right track when you say you're committed to you.

    Hard to judge based on one tiny paragraph, but that's my two-cents.:flowerforyou:
  • newstart
    newstart Posts: 40
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    First let me say , Kudos for doing very good in a tough situation:flowerforyou:

    Second I`m sure that evening was full of conficting emotions which must have been hard on you.

    Anyway here are a few suggestions that may help in the future.

    If you value the friendship , make it a point to still see this friend but with a few basic rules or guidelines...Sit down with her and have a talk concerning your weightloss issues. You should keep it to your weightloss as she may not be ready to commit. Suggest that you guys do things together as friends such as going to a show, or other things that do not involve you going over for dinner. If you guys want to have meals together , suggest that when that happens you`ll do the cooking because you need to stay in control. Mention that she is welcome to join you in the weightloss efforts if she choses to do so and that you can support her but that in the meantime you need to really focus and make this a priority for yourself.
    There are many activities friends can do together that does not involve food. You could go bowling etc...
    Good Luck

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