Please help!

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This is the first post that I have made on this site. I'm need of help... Support.. Motivation... Guidance or whatever you want to call it... I have turned to this community for help it happens to me all the time. The day were spring hits and it's time to buy new summer clothes... Nothing more depressing when nothing ever ever fits... I'll start off buy telling you I'm 29...5 ft 10 in.. Currently weighing 260 lbs.. I've been even heavier before but I am pretty sure it had alot to do with the meds I was on at the time... I go through phases as every one does I guess but I'm in a very depressed state right now...I know what i need to do to loose weight but just can't seem to stay on track to make it work long term... If u tell me I can't have something or limit me to something it makes me want it even more.... I have a gym membership and have been going Here and there... Use to go alot more steady... I know at of people are going to say ear heart and stay active... Well that's alot easier said than done or is it? I always seem to fall off... What should I do. Go on a strict low carb diet. No carbs? No sugar... Like there's so many options... And every last person is different... I can't afford a personal trainer and am in need of basic guidance and tips or motivation to get my *kitten* in gear and change my life for the better. I am not getting any younger.. I know I am the only person to have to be able to change this problem buy I need help along the way... I've lost weight before but I'll be honest I was in a rehab facility for 6 months and was almost forced to est healthy and in house and no take out. But once real life sets in again it's so easy to fall off... Almost all my friends are in food shape and drink a lot so the temptations to eat *kitten* and drink are always there... I always get stressed and think about all of this all at once and by the end of it all I just already wanna give up. I have such low self esteem these days it's a struggle from day to day. But here I am ready to change my life for the better and am willing to talk to this community as to what I need to do in order to change that. Consider this day one of the weight loss journey again.... Want to go and do a nice healthy grocery shop tonight.. Need to start finding things I can enjoy and stay away from the subway which is always my crutch... And don't soda is a massive issue to as I consume close to a 2L bottle a day... Maybe these are life issues and not for this community.. Sorry if I bored you with all my baggage.... Talk with some of u soon

Replies

  • crater1555
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    I wamt this to be a lifestyle change instead of a strict diet that I will likely fail at a month from now.
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    edited April 2015
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    If you are a little depressed right now you will talk about your barriers instead of opportunities. I suggest you make a list of opportunities and some mid-stream goals towards where you want to be. It is very hard to stay motivated on a plan that will take years with an indefinite conclusion. So make it easier on yourself and come up with some mini-goals.
    crater1555 wrote: »
    I go through phases as every one does I guess but I'm in a very depressed state right now

    Might you get some short-term medical help with the depression?
    If u tell me I can't have something or limit me to something it makes me want it even more....

    I suggest making peace with your inner hedonist and promise yourself you will never deprive yourself of the foods you really enjoy. I did this a year ago January and it's kept me to the plan and kept me happy too. Just fit your favourite foods in to your calorie goals.
    I know at of people are going to say [eat less] and stay active... Well that's alot easier said than done or is it?

    That's the overall plan, yes, and it's frankly the only sustainable way to go. Harder to do at first, easier than you believe to maintain. I suggest getting used to logging for the first two weeks. I think this should be your first goal. Eat as you always have, and log it for two weeks. Analyse the results and consider in two weeks how you can make small changes towards your health.
    I can't afford a personal trainer and am in need of basic guidance and tips or motivation to get my *kitten* in gear and change my life for the better.

    For a starter workout routine, look up the seven minute or a HIIT routine to start. Download an app, print off a routine, or rip one out of a health magazine. Do it for two weeks and evaluate the results.
    Need to start finding things I can enjoy and stay away from the subway which is always my crutch... And don't soda is a massive issue to as I consume close to a 2L bottle a day...

    Since deprivation doesn't work for you (doesn't for me either), continue to enjoy Subway and your diet sodas. They both fit very well in to a sustainable weight loss plan.
  • JenStarEats
    JenStarEats Posts: 2 Member
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    Hi, I know how you feel. I find it really hard to get motivated and struggle to stay on track with a healthy regime. I can't afford agym membership so have to work out at home which is much harder.

    The first thing I'll say is that you need to change the way you think. A constant pessimistic attitude to your health and journey will only set yourself up for failure.
    Start telling yourself that you can beat this. You can lose the weight. You can go to the gym and enjoy a workout. You can change your life.
    Keep telling yourself YOU CAN and you will find that you will start to feel more positive about the whole thing.

    When it comes to eating, start by making small sustainable changes, one at a time. My first change was to swap out toast at breakfast time for chopped fruit and yoghurt instead.
    Give yourself a good 2-3 weeks to get used to each eating change before you introduce another. This way it becomes a new habit that is easy to maintain as opposed to a fad.
    Other changes to consider introducing are fresh fruit and veg snacks instead of biscuits, crisps or chocolate.
    Choose low fat options of dips, sauces, dairy products etc.
    Cut down bread and when you do have some, buy a small loaf of wholemeal as the slices are smaller.
    Instead of calorie laden desserts, have fruit and yoghurt or low cal ice lollies after meals and for snacks.

    Last year I lost three stone by using the above techniques, I'm just starting back out to rekick my weightloss and hope to lose another two stone.

    Good luck
  • kommodevaran
    kommodevaran Posts: 17,890 Member
    edited April 2015
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    I know losing weight seems difficult and unpleasant before you start, maybe even expensive - but it really doesn't have to be. Read the sexypants thread: http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242/a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants
  • mrbillgrr
    mrbillgrr Posts: 1 Member
    edited April 2015
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    I read a lot of passion in your post about wanting to make a life change. I support you 110%!! I started the same journey about 2 months ago and slowly the weight is coming off and I am totally re-learning how to eat. MFP has been such an important factor in helping me to eat far more healthy. I will admit, the exercise piece of this journey is coming along much more slowly, but I give myself permission for that and work a little more at it every day. I know one day I will suddenly wake up and realize that my life has been totally changed by the exercise, just like it has over the last 60 days by using MFP.
    Don't ever give up!! Take it one day at a time, take small steps toward your goals, give yourself permission to not have everything 100% right out of the shoot . . . just keep working at it every day and suddenly you will realize that you have accomplished a huge life style change.
  • gaurdgoose
    gaurdgoose Posts: 106 Member
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    <3 Crater I am 54 Morbidly Obese, type 2 diabetic, with high blood pressure.
    At one point I weighed 428 lbs. I am half way to skinny now down to 311 lbs on way down to 200
    You are young, Intelligent, you can do this. I started my journey by saying Ok maybe I could could use some help and went and saw my doctor for advice. I decided I would do what ever they said even counseling if I had to. Yes I went on an antidepressant but that does not mean you need to.
    You have to love your self. Enlighten yourself. Track your food on this app and read a lot of posts and learn, learn, learn. The scary part of starting something is when you have lots of questions but are afraid to ask for help.
    There are lots of good people on here who would be glad to be friends and help you out and answer questions. My Dr. said primarily Fixing what you eat will take take care of the weight loss. Exercise helps you maintain the loss. You got this You can do it <3

  • axesesh
    axesesh Posts: 51 Member
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    Hi, I feel that you are almost panicking. Don't worry. Stay calm. You can do it. This is a great site for logging on what you eat, even the days you eat junk. That is key. Just log it all in and seeing how you ate today will inspire you to do better tomorrow. And seeing that eating well for about a week brings a change in your weight is positive reinforcement and that will encourage you further.

    But thinking about the future can be very overwhelming. So, just take time before every meal and repeat this mantra to yourself 5 times and mean it: I will make the right choice NOW at this meal. I will give my body a fairly healthy combo of 1 serving Protein+1 serving carb+1 serving fat+1 fruit+1 cup veggies NOW at this meal (you might not even be able to eat all of that in 1 meal). But do this at every meal. And for dessert, stick to greek yogurt with a fruit flavoring for a week. And please, don't eat dessert after every meal. Just once a day. Pick a time you want to eat it. It's doable.

    The key to weight loss is eating only as many calories as you are allowed here. Exercise has very little to do with weight loss. However, if you exercise, you can eat back what you burned. So, if you love eating more, then exercise gives you that leeway. That is all. So, if you hate exercise, that's fine. You can still lose all the weight you want to with diet alone. Exercise does boost your metabolism, increase your immunity and gets you fitter but you will get there eventually. Rome was not built in a day.

    A person, Diane Carbonell (she has a blog - you can google her), is one I look up to for motivation. She lost 158 pounds and she was over 300 pounds for over 10 years and she lost weight and has maintained the weight for over 15 years now.

    Again, at every meal, say the mantra above and truly take weight loss 1 meal at a time. Don't worry about what craving you will get, what you will do later, etc. Just the one meal - I will eat right at this one meal. And when you do eat right at the mea, rejoice and be happy and feel proud that you made a good choice for yourself and your body and be happy about that. And if you slip up and eat something that you didn't plan to, that's fine. It happens to all of us. Enjoy what you are eating to the maximum WITHOUT feeling guilty and go back to your next meal and make it healthy. Good luck. Feel free to add me as a friend if you want to.
  • MummyTina29
    MummyTina29 Posts: 60 Member
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    Hiya :) when i seen this post i thought i had to reply, i am 29 years old and 5ft 4 and weigh at 189lbs i would love to get down to 140lbs or something like that i can only hope and dream lol i am also like you i find it hard to motivate myself and i dont even need to go to the gym i have a few exercising equipment's and youtube :D youtube is brilliant for finding new workouts, i have lost count the amount of times ive been on mfp i once had loads of friends on here that was about 2 years ago and they were very supportive and i lost 8lbs but then i lost track deleted my friends and shut down mfp i gained my 8lb back plus an extra 5lb and i had no support anymore cause i deleted everyone so decided to come back and try make some new friends and this time not to give up cause back then when i started my mfp friends really helped my biggest downfall is alcohol :o i just love to get drunk and i can always get a good night sleep i am not an alcoholic lol and cheese why does cheese have to be so fattening :( anyway i hope we can be friends and support each other i currently have no friends on here yet you can be my first :p
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
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    Popping to add that I control my cheese portions by pre-cutting in to 20g slices and freezing them. I also like low-fat cheddar, which is sacrilege around here. But I like it. One cheese slice a day.
  • MummyTina29
    MummyTina29 Posts: 60 Member
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    jgnatca wrote: »
    Popping to add that I control my cheese portions by pre-cutting in to 20g slices and freezing them. I also like low-fat cheddar, which is sacrilege around here. But I like it. One cheese slice a day.
    i find it really hard to control my cheese portions lol i did have some Philadelphia low fat garlic and herb cheese with my dinner to night about a table spoon of it.
  • juliet3455
    juliet3455 Posts: 3,015 Member
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    I have re-posted this multiple times : I was using MFP for a good 6 months before I found these posts so it is a bit of a personal mission of mine to pass them on to other people who are just starting and struggling.

    My standard suggestion/tip is to do some reading and buy a kitchen scale!!!

    Visit this links about building Habits.
    http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/ihad/view/the-power-of-habit-part-1-why-habits-matter-688130

    arditarose and blankiefinder‌ Nailed it when it comes to Logging accurately and selecting food using the search feature.
    arditarose wrote: »
    Weigh your eggs and find the appropriate entry. Two eggs at 50 grams is typically 140 calories. If you cooked them with olive oil, add that as well.
    if I haven't found an entry that lists the grams, I keep looking for a different entry. This [ Enter Food ] item is already listed a bunch of times. Better to edit and correct one that is already there than add to the database mess that exists now. :)
    Merkavar wrote: »
    What? Where are the *s? I don't think I have ever seen on and also if I did see one I didn't know that no * meant it was a my fitness pal entry.
    JPW1990 wrote: »
    Go to the database and look up something like poptarts or doritos. You'll see an asterisk before the first letter of every food on the list. When you look up something like tomato or chicken breast, there should be at least one entry without one, that's official from MFP via the USDA site or similar, and a bunch of others entered by users that start with the asterisk.

    When creating or editing a Food item from the existing database my Personal Bias is to Edit an existing Entry and enter the nutritional values based on grams ( 100 gm ) as it makes the portion size math easy. Especially when you use a scale and WEIGH EVERYTHING. Don't log 2 eggs as it is a subjective number, where 50 gm. is very concise.
    Re-train/calibrate your mind as to what a portion size is..
    You will be surprised how small some portions look when you start to weigh them out. The average cereal bowl I have in my kitchen will hold 2-6 portions.

    For Nutritional values start with the values from the product label and Cross Reference/Confirm it with the un-biased nutritional information from the USDA web site at 100 gm.

    http://ndb.nal.usda.gov/

    Visit the Eat-Train-Progress group and read the pinned topics. If you click on the little STAR you can bookmark the topic for future reference.

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/group/10118-eat-train-progress

    Read the information at these MFP post. They have links to multiple very good reads.

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/833026/important-posts-to-read/p1

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/categories/getting-started

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1234699/logging-accurately-step-by-step-guide/p1 ( Thanks Stef for this great post )

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1080242/a-guide-to-get-you-started-on-your-path-to-sexypants/p1

    http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1069278/acronyms-and-terms-for-new-mfp-members-v-6/p1

    http://blog.myfitnesspal.com/the-next-step/
  • juliet3455
    juliet3455 Posts: 3,015 Member
    edited April 2015
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    :)