The greatest compliment

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  • Lexicpt
    Lexicpt Posts: 209 Member
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    "You look like you've lost weight."

    Instant good mood. Haha.
  • gpstreet
    gpstreet Posts: 184 Member
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    I did say to a girl today, it looks like she had lost weight. It occured to me she could of taken it as I thought she had been fat before. You cannot win sometimes.
  • lthames0810
    lthames0810 Posts: 722 Member
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    gpstreet wrote: »
    I did say to a girl today, it looks like she had lost weight. It occured to me she could of taken it as I thought she had been fat before. You cannot win sometimes.

    You're right...you can't win.

    As someone who is uncomfortable with compliments (or really any reference to my appearance) I way overthink the consequences of comments I may consider making.

    If I want to comment on someone's apparent loss of weight, I wonder if she'll think I've thought she was fat before, or that I've been observing her in a creepy way. Or I wonder if maybe she appeared to have lost weight only because she'd been ill. Or maybe she was pregnant before and I never noticed?

    If I want to comment on someone's hair, I'll wonder if maybe she'd had her hair cut days ago and I never noticed. Or I'll wonder if she's unhappy with her hair cut and is therefore self concious about it and now I will have drawn more attention to it.

    If I want to comment to my host on their lovely home, maybe they'll think I think it somehow remarkable that they would have a lovely home. "What, did you expect I lived in a barn?"

    I've probably verbally paralyzed myself more often than not.

  • azulvioleta6
    azulvioleta6 Posts: 4,195 Member
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    How about:

    "You look good!"

    or

    "You are beautiful."

    Stop overthinking guys!
  • llUndecidedll
    llUndecidedll Posts: 724 Member
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    I don't care for people to make comments or ask questions about anything related to my weight/physical appearance... Positive or negative. But I'm not offended if someone does.

    These comments/questions just annoy me.

    You wouldn't want them to ask you if you've gained weight.
  • llUndecidedll
    llUndecidedll Posts: 724 Member
    edited April 2015
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    .
  • LAWoman72
    LAWoman72 Posts: 2,846 Member
    edited April 2015
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    Well, on Saturday I came into the room in a baseball jersey (my son had a game) and some nice-fitting jeans and my husband looked at me and said, "You know, I've gotta be honest with you, my (starts with a D) is getting pretty hard right now."

    I have decided it must have been a compliment. Probably not one I can expect to hear from my kid's teacher or the bag girl at Ralph's or the local crossing guard or anything, though. At least not without the police being called in.

  • gpstreet
    gpstreet Posts: 184 Member
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    My wife said I didn't need to lose anymore weight. I am wondering if I should take that as a compliment or not :-s
  • SusanKKO
    SusanKKO Posts: 45 Member
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    I understand why most people enjoy hearing compliments on their weight loss and understandably so as it takes work and dedication to achieve it.

    For me, only because I have lost and regained weight multiple times, I'm more comfortable not receiving compliments, or comments, because I don't want my weight to be an issue any longer. And, I feel like if someone notices a weight loss, then they are also noticing weight gains.

    I know the intent is good and I appreciate that they care and that is really what matters. Maybe when the day comes once I have maintained a healthy weight for several years, I'll feel differently.
  • gpstreet
    gpstreet Posts: 184 Member
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    Losing weight is difficult and words of encouragement are helpful.
  • llUndecidedll
    llUndecidedll Posts: 724 Member
    edited April 2015
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    1592984904984984089984980 wrote: »
    I tell people congrats on being normal


    Is it wrong that I'm a lifetime fatty who enjoys this kind of talk....

    We should all do what we can to make the world a brighter place.

    I actually don't like to comment on others' weight loss because I don't actually want to have a long[er] conversation with them. Is that wrong? Or is that like ignoring the elephant in the room? Should I just address it instead of saying "hi, bye"? Maybe.

    Anywho.
  • ea15792
    ea15792 Posts: 14 Member
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    My favourite compliment came from someone I work with who I only see every six months or so. They told me that I looked happy and that I was glowing. That was the nicest compliment I've received.

    I also really like the people who I haven't seen me in awhile who are clearly bit shocked and tell me I look amazing. Those reactions are lovely because I know it's not just lip service. Especially, as those compliments aren't just about the weight loss, they are also about my attitude and how I carry myself. Plus, it helps that I feel awesome so why wouldn't I also look awesome!
  • gpstreet
    gpstreet Posts: 184 Member
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    I remember, years ago, my uncle telling me that I had filled out a bit. The words were not as bad as the look of shock he had when he saw me. Then again it had been a long time since he had seen me and a lot of pies had passed under the bridge.I think he saw me before university time (19 years old) and some time after university ( 25 years).
  • lauracups
    lauracups Posts: 533 Member
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    The BEST was while at my trainer's. A gritty ol school type gym. During the end of my session my hands were a lil tender (forgot my gloves) and I jokingly referred to myself as a "delicate lil flower. This big ol guy pipes up "honey I just saw you train! nuthin delicate lil flower about cha!"
    That meant more than a thousand "you're hot" s
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,627 Member
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    i love it when someone notices im losing/lost weight!!! and yes, it happens most from people you dont see often!
  • glassyo
    glassyo Posts: 7,636 Member
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    I never really learned to take a compliment. I tried to train myself to just accept it and say thank you but even now, when someone comments on how tiny I am now, I still say, "You haven't seen my stomach and thighs!"

    My favorite compliment, tho, came from this woman I would pass every once in a while on the bike trail I walk on. She didn't speak much english but stopped me and put her hands out apart with her palms facing inwards and moved them up and down which is apparently sign language for, "You lost weight." She could have given me some hips but I'll take what I can get. :)
  • Adc7225
    Adc7225 Posts: 1,318 Member
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    For some reason compliments from a person who works out means more than from those that don't. My brother and SIL are very fit and active and at one point he was making a comment about hiking and how long it would take a friend of theirs being that she was not fit like us! It meant so much to be included in that category instead of the other one.
  • gpstreet
    gpstreet Posts: 184 Member
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    I think compliments we pay ourselves are worth something. Standing back and noting the difference between before and after is important.
  • gabylewis22
    gabylewis22 Posts: 41 Member
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    Having a friend who's always been tiny ask to borrow some of my outfits made me crazy happy. Like, YESSSS WE CAN SHARE CLOTHES NOW! :smiley:

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