Is it rude...????

doglvr_75
doglvr_75 Posts: 144
edited September 19 in Chit-Chat
I've been living in Mississippi for nearly 18 months now, having moved from central Illinois....and I still cannot believe the number of times I am asked "Where are you from?":grumble: In fact, in church (of all places) this morning, the same woman asked me 3 times consecutively....I happen to find this very offensive and just wanted to vent and get some of your opinions....

The central Illinois area is culturally diverse with residents from all over the globe, I worked with the public and would never have questioned a person's origin....

Thoughts anyone????

...and thanks in advance...:flowerforyou:
Vee

Replies

  • I've been living in Mississippi for nearly 18 months now, having moved from central Illinois....and I still cannot believe the number of times I am asked "Where are you from?":grumble: In fact, in church (of all places) this morning, the same woman asked me 3 times consecutively....I happen to find this very offensive and just wanted to vent and get some of your opinions....

    The central Illinois area is culturally diverse with residents from all over the globe, I worked with the public and would never have questioned a person's origin....

    Thoughts anyone????

    ...and thanks in advance...:flowerforyou:
    Vee
  • songbyrdsweet
    songbyrdsweet Posts: 5,691 Member
    Do you have an accent?
    I got that a lot when I moved from Michigan to Virginia. I wasn't bothered by that so much, but it got annoying when people would ask me to say words like 'apple' and 'math' because I said my A's "funny". I'm sure people are just trying to make small talk. I think it's rude when they try to turn you into a circus performer. :tongue:
  • Fitness_Chick
    Fitness_Chick Posts: 6,648 Member
    I've been living in Mississippi for nearly 18 months now, having moved from central Illinois....and I still cannot believe the number of times I am asked "Where are you from?":grumble: In fact, in church (of all places) this morning, the same woman asked me 3 times consecutively....I happen to find this very offensive and just wanted to vent and get some of your opinions....

    The central Illinois area is culturally diverse with residents from all over the globe, I worked with the public and would never have questioned a person's origin....

    Thoughts anyone????

    ...and thanks in advance...:flowerforyou:
    Vee
    Hi:bigsmile: Well living in the Midwest much of my life when we say that around here it's a kind gesture...I don't know how folks are asking it ..of you but here it's like a "Hello, Where are you from?" done with a smile... Now I don't live in Ill and I know there are many many transplants there so I think it could be more that sort of thing rather than rudeness? Just my thoughts on the matter as a native Midwestern Girl:wink::bigsmile:

    Oh I should probably add:laugh: ...whenever I hear someone with an accent around here I LOVE to find out where they are from... we don't have strong accents here so it's always lovely to hear...my thoughts anyway...I could sit and listen to a gal like you from Mississippi (see..HEHEH I can even spell it...Nuns...what can ya say...they taught me to spell Mississippi:noway: :huh: :laugh: :wink: :bigsmile: ) Now Chicago on the other hand to me many native Chicago folks have REALLY strong accents... :wink:

    I know when I lived in NC and several other East Coast locations they ran from friendly Southern "Hey!!" folks to uppity folks that asked what state NE was in:grumble: :noway: :angry: :laugh: ...apparently they weren't taught Geography by Nuns:laugh: )

    I'm so sorry it feels offensive to you:flowerforyou: ...I can only speak as one person that adores accents (My Mother was from England and EVERY single person that I hear with her lovely accent I practically run to chat with so I can have sweet memories of her voice...I lost her in my early 20's:cry: )

    OMG!! I am SO NOT OVER THE FLU.... I read your whole post completely the opposite...thinking you were moved TO Ill FROM Miss......omg...I'm so sorry! Then I have no clue:blushing: :laugh:

    sheeeeesh....I hope I make it the gym ok...I have to drive a moving vechicle:noway: :laugh: :bigsmile: :huh:
  • Do you have an accent?
    I got that a lot when I moved from Michigan to Virginia. I wasn't bothered by that so much, but it got annoying when people would ask me to say words like 'apple' and 'math' because I said my A's "funny". I'm sure people are just trying to make small talk. I think it's rude when they try to turn you into a circus performer. :tongue:

    .....I don't think I have an accent....and I say that because I speak just like newscasters on the major networks....in fact, if I remember correctly, I believe that they train them to speak "midwestern"... I'm probably being overly sensitive, but it really annoyed me when the "church lady" questioned me 3 times this a.m.....
  • Hi Well living in the Midwest much of my life when we say that around here it's a kind gesture...I don't know how folks are asking it ..of you but here it's like a "Hello, Where are you from?" done with a smile... Now I don't live in Ill and I know there are many many transplants there so I think it could be more that sort of thing rather than rudeness? Just my thoughts on the matter as a native Midwestern Girl

    ....when I'm asked, it usually takes the form of..."you're not from around here, where are you from?"....like I'm some sort of space alien....:noway:
  • I am from Oklahoma, and when we ask people where they are from, it is usually because they look different, and have an accent, or just because they have an accent. I think more than anything it is because people are interested in knowing you, or making conversation. I know for a lot of people where I am from they hear an European accent, someone is bound to ask where they are from. I would not consider it rude to ask if they are showing a curious interest, or just trying to make conversation. I would consider it rude, if they asked you to be a circus preformer, or were asking because they were sizing you up to make a judgement.
  • Fitness_Chick
    Fitness_Chick Posts: 6,648 Member
    Hi Well living in the Midwest much of my life when we say that around here it's a kind gesture...I don't know how folks are asking it ..of you but here it's like a "Hello, Where are you from?" done with a smile... Now I don't live in Ill and I know there are many many transplants there so I think it could be more that sort of thing rather than rudeness? Just my thoughts on the matter as a native Midwestern Girl

    ....when I'm asked, it usually takes the form of..."you're not from around here, where are you from?"....like I'm some sort of space alien....:noway:
    Oh ok...oh yea, I sure got that when I lived in NC for a couple years... still no clue.....but still plans to get my delirious confused butt to the gym now...:laugh: :blushing: :bigsmile:

    Have a wonderful evening doglvr_75 and all:drinker:
  • ckmama
    ckmama Posts: 1,668 Member
    I live in S. LA and I guarantee you that you have an accent. I hope you don't get offended but my entire family on both sides, husbands too is from the great state MS. And being from down south and especially MS you can spot someone in a minute that isn't from this area.

    They say some of the rudest things to people, but that is part of their culture. Watch out, they won't shy away to tell you you're getting fat, or comment about the size of your legs or the color of your hair. They don't hold their tongue and if you say something about it being rude, they won't understand they will just think you are are uptight.

    I know that is generalizing most of the population of MS but that is about 98% of the people I deal with from there.
  • I live in S. LA and I guarantee you that you have an accent. I hope you don't get offended but my entire family on both sides, husbands too is from the great state MS. And being from down south and especially MS you can spot someone in a minute that isn't from this area.

    They say some of the rudest things to people, but that is part of their culture. Watch out, they won't shy away to tell you you're getting fat, or comment about the size of your legs or the color of your hair. They don't hold their tongue and if you say something about it being rude, they won't understand they will just think you are are uptight.

    I know that is generalizing most of the population of MS but that is about 98% of the people I deal with from there.
    :smile: Thanks for the heads up.....Maybe they just don't know any better....at least I know it's not just me.....:wink:
  • arewethereyet
    arewethereyet Posts: 18,702 Member
    I have always lived Florida where it is quite common to ask someone where they are from.

    I have also noticed it in southern states, like a Hello, where y'all from?

    Are you in a touristy place? Living in a transient area, like near a base, you may get this question more often.

    I have some friends from another country. I worked with them during season and wouldnt see them for 6 months. When I returned I had put on 30 pounds or so. I entered the room and 1 woman yells....Oh Jeannie is FAT! And comes over to hug me. In their country, being fat means you are rich enough to eat good food. I was definately taken aback by the remark, but once I was educated on their background, I laughed and said I sure am....I was making the BIG BUCKS at my other job!!!

    Good luck!! I hope you enjoy your new home!!:flowerforyou:
  • keiko
    keiko Posts: 2,919 Member
    I don't think it's rude. To them you have an accent. I grew up in Upper Michigan and now live in WI. I am always being asked if I'm from Canada! I was just on a cruise and not a day went by that someone did not ask. Funny part is even my husband was teasing me today!
  • :flowerforyou: Thanks everyone!!! :flowerforyou: I guess I am/was being overly sensitive and had been stewing about this all day...I knew I'd get some good advice/replies from all of you....

    Y'all :noway: (still not easy for me to say)..:blushing: are the best!!!!

    Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Happy Kwanza....and a great new year to everyone!!!! :drinker:
  • I'm from MA, and people get a kick out of my "Boston" accent. They don't have to ask where I am fron, since the accent usually gives it away haha. I do hate being asked to say "Park the car in Harvard Yard". FYI, Harvard does not HAVE a yard. :laugh:
  • Tiddle
    Tiddle Posts: 762 Member
    I dont think it's rude at all, being in the military it's normally the first question I ask someone I meet because the people I meet are from all over the place!!
  • Fitness_Chick
    Fitness_Chick Posts: 6,648 Member
    I'm from MA, and people get a kick out of my "Boston" accent. They don't have to ask where I am fron, since the accent usually gives it away haha. I do hate being asked to say "Park the car in Harvard Yard". FYI, Harvard does not HAVE a yard. :laugh:
    oh oh oh!! But we love to hear you all say it anyway!!:drinker: :bigsmile: :bigsmile:

    Like NY'rs could sit an listen for hours to that accent as well!.... pawk the caw on turdy turd treat.. or something like that? LOL Ok, maybe that's the Bronx? :blushing: :blushing: :yawn: aaahhh g'night now all:blushing: :bigsmile:
  • may_marie
    may_marie Posts: 667 Member
    if its rude ?? not its not ,, people ar ejust getting an interest in you !!!,,

    i am rarely in my home country of canada,, and when im there,, i normaly spend my time in ontario,,, when i was born in quebec.. so i have a strong french canadian accent. now when im in ontario, people will know right away where my accent is from ,, but here ??? in scotland,,, its halarious.. ive been told i was greek once.. or swedish .. or polish .. named it !!! i find it funny.. espacialy since when i tell them im canadian.. theyll all mess up because then they dont understand why i have an accent at all because all the canadian tv they get people have an americanish accent................ then they assume i was born in canada but raised in france ..lol

    anyways . dont feel bad.. because are curious in general, its also a good ice breaker and you can make friends that way...
  • This content has been removed.
  • This content has been removed.
  • TamTastic
    TamTastic Posts: 19,224 Member
    I've been living in Mississippi for nearly 18 months now, having moved from central Illinois....and I still cannot believe the number of times I am asked "Where are you from?":grumble: In fact, in church (of all places) this morning, the same woman asked me 3 times consecutively....I happen to find this very offensive and just wanted to vent and get some of your opinions....

    The central Illinois area is culturally diverse with residents from all over the globe, I worked with the public and would never have questioned a person's origin....

    Thoughts anyone????

    ...and thanks in advance...:flowerforyou:
    Vee

    Are you offended when someone asks you "how's the weather?"
    If it were YOU asking, I would be! :huh: :laugh:
  • nickybr38
    nickybr38 Posts: 674 Member
    I've been living in Mississippi for nearly 18 months now, having moved from central Illinois....and I still cannot believe the number of times I am asked "Where are you from?":grumble: In fact, in church (of all places) this morning, the same woman asked me 3 times consecutively....I happen to find this very offensive and just wanted to vent and get some of your opinions....

    The central Illinois area is culturally diverse with residents from all over the globe, I worked with the public and would never have questioned a person's origin....

    Thoughts anyone????

    ...and thanks in advance...:flowerforyou:
    Vee

    I don't think it's rude to ask someone where they're from. I DO think it's rude to ask them and forget. That's showing they weren't listening in the first place. :grumble:

    I live in a very transient town, people are coming and going all the time. Around here you never assume someone is a 'resident', you kind of start conversations with; hey, where are you from? In itself the question isn't rude. :smile:

    But you never know, the woman from church might just have a really short memory so I'd give her the benefit of doubt.
  • BrainyBurro
    BrainyBurro Posts: 6,129 Member
    I've been living in Mississippi for nearly 18 months now, having moved from central Illinois....and I still cannot believe the number of times I am asked "Where are you from?":grumble: In fact, in church (of all places) this morning, the same woman asked me 3 times consecutively....I happen to find this very offensive and just wanted to vent and get some of your opinions....

    The central Illinois area is culturally diverse with residents from all over the globe, I worked with the public and would never have questioned a person's origin....

    Thoughts anyone????

    ...and thanks in advance...:flowerforyou:
    Vee

    why do you dislike southerners?
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member
    How come you find it rude?

    I'm always curious where people come from, and I like to learn a little bit about where they come from if I've never been to that area.
  • 1PatientBear
    1PatientBear Posts: 2,089 Member
    Never mind. Stupid burro.
  • TheSlorax
    TheSlorax Posts: 2,401 Member
    sneaky
  • ldrosophila
    ldrosophila Posts: 7,512 Member

    But you never know, the woman from church might just have a really short memory so I'd give her the benefit of doubt.

    She could have the beginnings of dementia
  • I'm from Texas and when I open my mouth, I might as well have a huge blinking neon TEXAS on my forehead. I think people are just trying to get to know you better. My major in college was Linguistics, so I love to hear different accents.
    Now that I said that, I remembered that on a business call to Michigan a few years back, the lady on the phone told me, "Girl, you sound country!". LOL And she had just as thick a Michigan accent as my Texas accent!
  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,865 Member
    You probably sound like a yankee....most definitely, a mid-west accent is very noticeable.

    Also, I often ask people where they're from when they're obviously not from around here...nothing rude about it...just genuinely curious.

    How do people get through life when they're so easily offended by every little thing?
  • CookNLift
    CookNLift Posts: 3,660 Member
    Take it with a grain of salt. They're probably just trying to make conversation and are ignorant to how offended you get.
  • jetscreaminagain
    jetscreaminagain Posts: 1,130 Member
    Do you have an accent?
    I got that a lot when I moved from Michigan to Virginia. I wasn't bothered by that so much, but it got annoying when people would ask me to say words like 'apple' and 'math' because I said my A's "funny". I'm sure people are just trying to make small talk. I think it's rude when they try to turn you into a circus performer. :tongue:

    .....I don't think I have an accent....and I say that because I speak just like newscasters on the major networks....in fact, if I remember correctly, I believe that they train them to speak "midwestern"... I'm probably being overly sensitive, but it really annoyed me when the "church lady" questioned me 3 times this a.m.....


    Right. And they don't speak like newscasters in Mississippi, do they. You talk like an outsider. My experience in the south tells me they don't like outsiders but are too "southern charm " to be truthful about it. It is also true that where are you from could be a more interesting topic of conversation than the weather "yup still hotter than Hades ", but if you sense judginess from a Southern Lady, and you're an outsider, I'd trust that 6th sense of yours. Maybe join the Junior League. Or price uhauls headed north. But duck if one of em says "isn't that niiiice?"
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    Lol. Rude? Lol.
This discussion has been closed.