Fellow College Students who put on more than the 'Freshman 15'

Hi guys. I know people talk about the Freshman 15, but I think the real embarrassing thing is when this happens to you and you're not a freshman. I'm definitely not. I'm a junior but this was my first time living on campus. Before I commuted.

Things got crazy and I sort of went into a depression over my near graduation and my job prospects. I also took on too many leadership roles and maintained a 4.0, which lead to many late night study sessions fueled by ice cream.

It doesn't help that I suffer from chronic OCD, so the fact that I ate a certain number of calories over my limit led to an "all or nothing" effect...aka what you'd call bingeing.

I really need some support. I went from a perfectly fine 108 to 153 in just four months. I'm mortified. I only have 32% body fat, so it is really a good deal of muscle thanks to working out in the process, but I am still very depressed over it.

It seems like I'm going to not have enough time this summer to lose it all. Do you think I can? Can I count on anyone in the same boat as me age/situation-wise to provide a beacon of support? I feel really stupid, but people don't know all the reasons why I gained so much. After losing over 80 lbs last year, I am terrified it is going to come back. Please help me.

PS

To be honest, this has been totally traumatizing and I have thought of suicide more than once. I don't want to graduate next year looking like this. I have a really important "study abroad" coming up in late August. If I wanted to get to, say 120 lbs (if I preserve my muscle it will look like 108 anyways), do you think I can do it by late August?

Can someone do this with me so I don't feel so alone? Please, please, please.