"To The Fatty Running On The Track This Afternoon"

24

Replies

  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,088 Member
    I just don't like that letter at all. I understand that she thought she was being motivating but I don't like it.
  • luluinca
    luluinca Posts: 2,899 Member
    I don't think they're real but if they were I'd prefer the response.

    When I started at the gym in Sept of 2013, over 60 lbs heavier than I am right now, I tried to be friendly with a couple who were about my age...............old. They totally snubbed me, but I didn't let it get to me. I didn't really care that much, I just wanted to get my work done and get the hell out of there.

    Now.............I've turned into a gym rat, but a friendly one, who gives others an acknowledgement of their hard work. A little encouragement and friendliness never hurt anyone. As far as the couple goes, now they want to be friends..............LOL, not interested.

    If the first guy really believed what he was saying................he would have made sure the runner knew it!
  • dolliesdaughter
    dolliesdaughter Posts: 544 Member
    Both of them, give me a friggin break.
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    catieraney wrote: »
    SezxyStef wrote: »
    If someone who is "exercising" has enough time to think this and then later write it they aren't spending enough time really exercising...when I work out I don't notice anyone around me...ever...I see the walls, the bars, the plates, the puddles to avoid and holes in the walking bridge...that's what I see.

    get your mind on your workout not what is around you...you'd be better off.

    Oh an btw the title sucks..."to the fatty..." WTF...

    Oh come on, you've never in your life looked around while you're exercising? When you're resting in between sets, you just stare at the ground? You never look at people to see if they're done with their set yet so you can use their bench? And what is this, you don't think when you exercise? Your mind is completely blank as you stare at the ground to look for puddles when you're jogging??

    We're humans. Of course we look around and see other people. Of course we think about them. And yeah, sometimes the thoughts are "judgy". Sometimes it's "Oh man that girl has such nice muscles" or "how is she jogging in denim shorts, my thighs would be so raw" or "that girl really needs to invest in a higher quality sports bra" or "oh god, that guy's workout shorts are too loose and I can totally see his butt crack, gross, ew, look away". This happens when I'm not at the gym, too.

    And I am absolutely certain that people have thought things along the exact same lines when they've seen me at the gym or on the street jogging or, really, just out and about in daily life. Do I care? No, because I am not a Milford man and will always be seen and heard. I used to jog around in the tiny atrium in my house because I was too afraid the neighbors would see me in between the slats of our fence. I was also in middle school, and was really really afraid what others would think about me in pretty much every situation. Luckily...I grew up. I realize that people are going to judge me and draw conclusions about me until, and hopefully after, I die. This is life. This does not change anything about who I actually am.

    With all of that said...just because I have these thoughts when I see other people, and think that it's totally normal to do so, doesn't mean I would EVER presume to post it on social media. Or tell anyone my thoughts about them. Because I know that these "judgements" and "assumptions" are just that - completely assumed; I know absolutely nothing about these people.

    Very few good things come from social media. This is not one of them.

    while exercising I am concentrating on the wall so I can get my lifts in, I have 1min rest between sets...time enough to get the bar ready for the next set...max 2mins...not a lot of time to look around at anyone I am working out...I have my own bench but even then looking at someone is different than "noticing them and thinking about them"...When I am running/walking...I am thinking about the music I am listening too ....or if I can make it to the next area without dying...

    Not everyone is the same...so no I don't look around at people when I am working out...and wonder about them...when I was jogging on Tuesday there were people walking (and we have to go opposite ways) don't ask me how many people were there I am not sure...might have been 3 or 4 i don't know..because I am working out my mind is on my workout...deal with it...
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    SezxyStef wrote: »
    If someone who is "exercising" has enough time to think this and then later write it they aren't spending enough time really exercising...when I work out I don't notice anyone around me...ever...I see the walls, the bars, the plates, the puddles to avoid and holes in the walking bridge...that's what I see.

    get your mind on your workout not what is around you...you'd be better off.

    Oh an btw the title sucks..."to the fatty..." WTF...
    Does exercising with no rest between sets work for you?

    When I lift, I notice things around me. When I rest, I notice things around me. When I walk, I notice things around me. Nice to know I've been "exercising" incorrectly all this time.

    Your post is about as cringe-inducing as the original one.

    When you are exercising do you notice them enough to write a FB post about the fatties?

    I have rests between sets but not long ones...and where did I say anyone was exercising incorrectly...I said if people spent less time noticing everything around them and more energy on their workout they would be better off.

    it's funny how people read into things so much(exercising incorrectly)...*smh*
  • DeguelloTex
    DeguelloTex Posts: 6,652 Member
    SezxyStef wrote: »
    SezxyStef wrote: »
    If someone who is "exercising" has enough time to think this and then later write it they aren't spending enough time really exercising...when I work out I don't notice anyone around me...ever...I see the walls, the bars, the plates, the puddles to avoid and holes in the walking bridge...that's what I see.

    get your mind on your workout not what is around you...you'd be better off.

    Oh an btw the title sucks..."to the fatty..." WTF...
    Does exercising with no rest between sets work for you?

    When I lift, I notice things around me. When I rest, I notice things around me. When I walk, I notice things around me. Nice to know I've been "exercising" incorrectly all this time.

    Your post is about as cringe-inducing as the original one.

    When you are exercising do you notice them enough to write a FB post about the fatties?

    I have rests between sets but not long ones...and where did I say anyone was exercising incorrectly...I said if people spent less time noticing everything around them and more energy on their workout they would be better off.

    it's funny how people read into things so much(exercising incorrectly)...*smh*
    I notice them enough to write posts about them, yeah. Particularly if someone or something stands out.

    You put exercising in quotes and said they weren't "really exercising" if they had time to think about something like that. The implication was clear, however much you want to try now to walk it back.
  • chelsy0587
    chelsy0587 Posts: 441 Member
    I agree with others that have stated no one has to except a compliment laced with insults. I find the original post to be just rude and mean spirited, but then I cannot stand Facebook at all so...

    I've had 3 people ( all women ) at my gym tell me that they can see the difference in me since I started going to the gym, they see my weight loss and they see 100% effort from me at every workout.

    That feels awesome, I really appreciate the compliment and I believe its genuine. BUT this only reinforces that people really are watching other people at the gym...

  • PeachyCarol
    PeachyCarol Posts: 8,029 Member
    I loathe this meme. Loathe it

    Signed,
    A fat runner who now wonders if a meme is being made about her every time she runs in public.

    I have no doubt you meant well though, OP. It's just that myself and many others find this meme extremely patronizing.

    That's sort of how I feel about the initial post.

    I'm not sure how I feel about what the guy did who responded. I get that he didn't intend for his response to go viral, and he made some valid points. I would rather he had been straight forward about his identity and not role-played, though.

  • jkal1979
    jkal1979 Posts: 1,896 Member
    This wasn't motivating when it first came out a few years ago and it's not motivating now.
  • PeachyCarol
    PeachyCarol Posts: 8,029 Member
    Bshmerlie wrote: »
    I think his reply sucks.

    The person wasn't writing it to be an a-hole. They wrote it because they respected the journey he chose to embark on to better himself. He's just an angry fat person who's taking his anger out on someone who meant well. No one who's 420 pounds put that much weight on by "eating better than most people". Sure maybe he's not eating midnight snacks but he'd have to be snacking on a lot of something to get that big. I'm 100 pounds overweight and you know what...I own it. I obviously didn't make the correct decisions when it came to food intake. But bashing someone who made up a creative back story for why a guy was out there running is foolish. When that guy reads his reply what's gonna be his impression of him now. He's simply gonna think he's a jerk and not give him the time of day.

    I think you misread something there. He was 400 pounds, started eating well, and by the time he was 300 pounds and was judged to be eating poorly, was eating a healthy diet.

    Moral of the story? You can't presume that someone who is obese is not eating well by looking at them.

  • jkal1979
    jkal1979 Posts: 1,896 Member
    I loathe this meme. Loathe it

    Signed,
    A fat runner who now wonders if a meme is being made about her every time she runs in public.

    I have no doubt you meant well though, OP. It's just that myself and many others find this meme extremely patronizing.

    That's sort of how I feel about the initial post.

    I'm not sure how I feel about what the guy did who responded. I get that he didn't intend for his response to go viral, and he made some valid points. I would rather he had been straight forward about his identity and not role-played, though.

    That is his writing style. He has done that with several other topics since then. The only thing is that he puts his own experiences in to make it about him. The most recent one he did was the lady at a ballpark who had pictures taken of her eating nachos and logging them into MFP.
  • PeachyCarol
    PeachyCarol Posts: 8,029 Member
    edited May 2015
    SezxyStef wrote: »
    SezxyStef wrote: »
    If someone who is "exercising" has enough time to think this and then later write it they aren't spending enough time really exercising...when I work out I don't notice anyone around me...ever...I see the walls, the bars, the plates, the puddles to avoid and holes in the walking bridge...that's what I see.

    get your mind on your workout not what is around you...you'd be better off.

    Oh an btw the title sucks..."to the fatty..." WTF...
    Does exercising with no rest between sets work for you?

    When I lift, I notice things around me. When I rest, I notice things around me. When I walk, I notice things around me. Nice to know I've been "exercising" incorrectly all this time.

    Your post is about as cringe-inducing as the original one.

    When you are exercising do you notice them enough to write a FB post about the fatties?

    I have rests between sets but not long ones...and where did I say anyone was exercising incorrectly...I said if people spent less time noticing everything around them and more energy on their workout they would be better off.

    it's funny how people read into things so much(exercising incorrectly)...*smh*

    Stef, I know what you mean, and believe me, when I'm doing intervals on the treadmill I'm very focused.

    However? If orgasm noise man gets on the treadmill next to me? (There's a guy in my gym who makes sex noises ... LOUD sex noises... when he runs) Yes, I could write a post about that.

  • ReeseG4350
    ReeseG4350 Posts: 146 Member
    edited May 2015
    The person who wrote the original post was, basically, saying, "Hey! I see you out there when I run. I see your fight. I see your efforts. Don't look away. Look up. Be proud of your efforts. 'You Rock'."

    In response this person got a major, "F-U!" Without regard for whether that original poster had ever been in 'Westview runner's' shoes, struggling to break through a wall of overweight and poor health, someone took it upon his or herself to condemn someone who was trying to be uplifting. Did the OP's words sound hard? Harsh? Blatantly raw? Well yes, they did. But, it's not like the two runners and everybody else did not know this person is overweight and every step is an effort. But this one runner is trying to say, "That's okay. You know it's okay because you continue to get out here and do it when there are so many others who just sit and home and complain and say... some day." The first poster is congratulating the unknown runner for ignoring 'some day' and getting out there. He is saying don't look away. Make eye contact. Look at me and see Give me a chance to give you a nod, one runner to another, to congratulate you on your fight and to give you the encouragement to be proud of your journey.

    There was no indication one way or the other that this first poster had not, once upon a time, been in those same shoes, slogging around the track with the greatest effort, stopping at every lap for a drink of water. We don't know what the circumstances were. What we do know was that he was making an effort to get a point across.

    You. You're fat. We both know that. I don't know your journey and you won't talk to me so all I can do is describe what I see and let you know you are doing a good job and you should be proud of yourself.

    Yeh. When I first read it, I, too, was a little angry that someone would write such an apparently condescending post. But, particularly in this case, that reveals a lot more about the reader. We all begin to make judgments of our own about the person writing such a 'horrid' load of comments about someone who is struggling with their weight. Then comes the twist, that his words are part of a larger picture. So, if we look deeper, maybe we can see that we have made a snap judgment about this person just as most people make snap judgments about everyone they see every day. Most people will see a very large person walking... waddling down the street and immediately, though perhaps unconsciously, make a judgment on that person and his or her life and lifestyle. Admit it. We do. The person who wrote that, at first blush, nasty and unkind post was actually rubbing our collective nose in our own judgmental nastiness while telling the victim of such nastiness that it's okay. Just ignore them. You are okay and I, for one, am proud of you.

    And yet here we are, all of us passing judgment on that person who just wanted to convey a moment of encouragement. So... What does that say about us?

    The rebuttal, on the other hand, comes off as deliberately judgmental and hateful and attacking with no redeeming factor. It reveals a decided insecurity in the author to so overtly target someone else, assuming the worst in that other person. THAT, for me, shows a total lack of understanding in the person who wrote the passage... of self and of others. It is all about the negative. And that is sad for the person who wrote it because it shows more hate than compassion, more anger than wisdom, more despair than hope.
  • ahamm002
    ahamm002 Posts: 1,690 Member
    Bshmerlie wrote: »
    I think his reply sucks.

    The person wasn't writing it to be an a-hole. They wrote it because they respected the journey he chose to embark on to better himself. He's just an angry fat person who's taking his anger out on someone who meant well. No one who's 420 pounds put that much weight on by "eating better than most people". Sure maybe he's not eating midnight snacks but he'd have to be snacking on a lot of something to get that big. I'm 100 pounds overweight and you know what...I own it. I obviously didn't make the correct decisions when it came to food intake. But bashing someone who made up a creative back story for why a guy was out there running is foolish. When that guy reads his reply what's gonna be his impression of him now. He's simply gonna think he's a jerk and not give him the time of day.

    I think you misread something there. He was 400 pounds, started eating well, and by the time he was 300 pounds and was judged to be eating poorly, was eating a healthy diet.

    Moral of the story? You can't presume that someone who is obese is not eating well by looking at them.

    Perhaps you can't assume they are not currently eating well. But they definitely must have ate poorly at some point. You'd have to eat pretty poorly for a very long time to reach 400 pounds.
  • Alluminati
    Alluminati Posts: 6,208 Member
    Ugh, this thing again.
  • BigLifter10
    BigLifter10 Posts: 1,153 Member
    SezxyStef wrote: »
    SezxyStef wrote: »
    If someone who is "exercising" has enough time to think this and then later write it they aren't spending enough time really exercising...when I work out I don't notice anyone around me...ever...I see the walls, the bars, the plates, the puddles to avoid and holes in the walking bridge...that's what I see.

    get your mind on your workout not what is around you...you'd be better off.

    Oh an btw the title sucks..."to the fatty..." WTF...
    Does exercising with no rest between sets work for you?

    When I lift, I notice things around me. When I rest, I notice things around me. When I walk, I notice things around me. Nice to know I've been "exercising" incorrectly all this time.

    Your post is about as cringe-inducing as the original one.

    When you are exercising do you notice them enough to write a FB post about the fatties?

    I have rests between sets but not long ones...and where did I say anyone was exercising incorrectly...I said if people spent less time noticing everything around them and more energy on their workout they would be better off.

    it's funny how people read into things so much(exercising incorrectly)...*smh*

    Stef, I know what you mean, and believe me, when I'm doing intervals on the treadmill I'm very focused.

    However? If orgasm noise man gets on the treadmill next to me? (There's a guy in my gym who makes sex noises ... LOUD sex noises... when he runs) Yes, I could write a post about that.



    Orgasm guy must be related to orgasm girl who does that when she lifts anything. Shoulders no different than squats. Must be good!
  • PeachyCarol
    PeachyCarol Posts: 8,029 Member
    ahamm002 wrote: »
    Bshmerlie wrote: »
    I think his reply sucks.

    The person wasn't writing it to be an a-hole. They wrote it because they respected the journey he chose to embark on to better himself. He's just an angry fat person who's taking his anger out on someone who meant well. No one who's 420 pounds put that much weight on by "eating better than most people". Sure maybe he's not eating midnight snacks but he'd have to be snacking on a lot of something to get that big. I'm 100 pounds overweight and you know what...I own it. I obviously didn't make the correct decisions when it came to food intake. But bashing someone who made up a creative back story for why a guy was out there running is foolish. When that guy reads his reply what's gonna be his impression of him now. He's simply gonna think he's a jerk and not give him the time of day.

    I think you misread something there. He was 400 pounds, started eating well, and by the time he was 300 pounds and was judged to be eating poorly, was eating a healthy diet.

    Moral of the story? You can't presume that someone who is obese is not eating well by looking at them.

    Perhaps you can't assume they are not currently eating well. But they definitely must have ate poorly at some point. You'd have to eat pretty poorly for a very long time to reach 400 pounds.

    You are arguing just to argue. How does that have anything to do with the particular people involved, specifically since that is who I was discussing with the other poster?

    But hey, I'll go with what you're saying, you can't judge how someone is CURRENTLY eating by how they look. That was my point.

  • rasheedahj
    rasheedahj Posts: 12 Member
    His intentions were good his method not so much.
  • kamakazeekim
    kamakazeekim Posts: 1,183 Member
    I loath the original post! I went through something very similar when I was battling my weight. I started gaining weight for unknown reasons when I was about 19 years old. I ate a strict 900 calorie diet and worked out 5 or 6 days a week. My weight continued to balloon for several years until I reached 263. I saw multiple doctors and nutritionists and none of them could give me any answers. They wouldn't believe my food and exercise journals because obviously fat people lie to hide their shameful eating. People at the gym I was going to frequently provided "helpful" unsolicited advice like what and when to eat, what exercises to do, that I have to push myself harder...stuff like that. I eventually felt so ashamed that I quit going to the gym and running in public. I was finally diagnosed with PCOS, endometriosis and hypothyroidism. Once I started treatment I lost the weight rapidly. Everyone started to tell me how hot/gorgeous/skinny I am and how proud they are of me for making a lifestyle change. Sorry to break it to you but I'm still eating and exercising the exact same amount as I was before only now my hormones are semi in-check. Sorry I wasn't good enough for you to notice or be kind to when I was heavy.
  • BigLifter10
    BigLifter10 Posts: 1,153 Member
    It all goes down to not judging the book by its cover. A person can never truly know what path the other person has been on. Maybe it was a horrible turn of events that brought on depression (or anything) that caused a health concern. Maybe that person was a track runner in his/her youth. Maybe it was an accident. To assume anything is human nature, but it isn't helpful for anyone.
  • lthames0810
    lthames0810 Posts: 722 Member
    chelsy0587 wrote: »
    I agree with others that have stated no one has to except a compliment laced with insults. I find the original post to be just rude and mean spirited, but then I cannot stand Facebook at all so...

    I've had 3 people ( all women ) at my gym tell me that they can see the difference in me since I started going to the gym, they see my weight loss and they see 100% effort from me at every workout.

    That feels awesome, I really appreciate the compliment and I believe its genuine. BUT this only reinforces that people really are watching other people at the gym...

    I'm heavy and I'm embarrased by it. I manage to go to the gym and get some exercise by telling myself that everyone there is busy and seeking the same thing no matter how fit they appear and nobody is looking at me anyway. It disturbs me and ruins my self talk to have it reinforced that in fact people are looking at me and judging.

  • obpyum
    obpyum Posts: 9 Member
    I have always found it odd that people think I am judging an overweight person while running or at the gym. I cant run for anything, so I'm always just jealous that they have more motivation than I do to "push through the pain" (I have the worst knees). And as for the gym, I'm always happy that people are working hard in any way. I am more likely to judge you for walking into a mcdonald's (as I eat my egg white mc muffin while typing this lol) before I judge you for walking into a gym. There are far fewer grumps at the gym than youd think! We are all there for our own reasons!
  • ReeseG4350
    ReeseG4350 Posts: 146 Member
    I really hate the original. How nauseatingly patronizing. Guess what, I don't need to be "inspired", I inspire myself. And the fact that whoever composed this thought it was at all appropriate to bring up the other person's weight shows how skewed their thinking is.
    The whole thing just reinforces the idea that fat people are only acceptable if they obviously are working their *** off to fight it and are miserable in the process.

    Do you turn away when you pass someone else on the running track? Probably not. You ARE sure of yourself, and congratulations. The Westview runner looks away when passing other runners, suggesting that person, to at least some extent, is less so.

    "Bringing up the other person's weight"? Do you suppose anybody there, most especially Westview Runner, is not aware that this person is overweight and, in all probability, the heaviest person on the track? If you believe the post reinforces the idea that fat people are miserable it, again, reflects more on the perceiver than the perception. What I see the author of that original post saying is that s/he recognizes the effort and congratulates that effort. S/he is telling Runner to raise his/her head and be proud of the efforts more than ashamed of the weight. Runner IS ashamed. Runner looks down, looks away when other runners pass. SOMEONE has made Runner believe that the weight identifies him/her and that IS who Runner is. The Westview Writer, on the other hand is trying to convey to Runner that this is not true. That Runner is, indeed, more than the sum of the scales. Westview Writer says to Runner, "You are more than that. Congratulations on your efforts. Be proud of who you are and don't let anyone put you down. I, for one, am on your side."

    To me, the most telling statement is the fact that this Runner is ashamed, looks away, looks down. That bespeaks a person who does feel some shame about who they are. Westview Writer was probably just trying to lend a hand of friendship. Maybe Writer had to walk/run off a couple hundred pounds and wants to be able to share Runner's journey, if only Runner would look their way.
  • RuNaRoUnDaFiEld
    RuNaRoUnDaFiEld Posts: 5,864 Member
    I don't believe their intentions were good or they would have had a few words of encouragement and a quick natter as he passed, not make a full on FB post about it.

    And how disrespectful to address it "To the fatty", why not to the person wearing xxxx today on the track at xx:xxPM.
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    SezxyStef wrote: »
    SezxyStef wrote: »
    If someone who is "exercising" has enough time to think this and then later write it they aren't spending enough time really exercising...when I work out I don't notice anyone around me...ever...I see the walls, the bars, the plates, the puddles to avoid and holes in the walking bridge...that's what I see.

    get your mind on your workout not what is around you...you'd be better off.

    Oh an btw the title sucks..."to the fatty..." WTF...
    Does exercising with no rest between sets work for you?

    When I lift, I notice things around me. When I rest, I notice things around me. When I walk, I notice things around me. Nice to know I've been "exercising" incorrectly all this time.

    Your post is about as cringe-inducing as the original one.

    When you are exercising do you notice them enough to write a FB post about the fatties?

    I have rests between sets but not long ones...and where did I say anyone was exercising incorrectly...I said if people spent less time noticing everything around them and more energy on their workout they would be better off.

    it's funny how people read into things so much(exercising incorrectly)...*smh*
    I notice them enough to write posts about them, yeah. Particularly if someone or something stands out.

    You put exercising in quotes and said they weren't "really exercising" if they had time to think about something like that. The implication was clear, however much you want to try now to walk it back.

    and how was my quotes about a person who wrote an article after "exercising" so loathsome and disgusting in anyway questioning how you exercise or if you are doing it right or wrong...

    I said and I am quoting

    If someone who is "exercising" has enough time to think this and then later write it they aren't spending enough time really exercising


    are you telling me you wrote the post? because there was a lot of detail in that particular article that would have required a lot of attention and if the attention of that particular person is on another person to that degree are they really putting a lot of effort into what they are doing????

    How many times have I see this in posts here on MFP...

    woman "I am scared of the weight side of the gym I will get looked at funny/strange/judged"

    MFP Poster "no one is looking at you we are all working out and worried about our workout not who is in the weight section of the gym"...

    but when I say it...bam "off with her head" and questioned about it as if I would lie about it...wtf.
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    SezxyStef wrote: »
    SezxyStef wrote: »
    If someone who is "exercising" has enough time to think this and then later write it they aren't spending enough time really exercising...when I work out I don't notice anyone around me...ever...I see the walls, the bars, the plates, the puddles to avoid and holes in the walking bridge...that's what I see.

    get your mind on your workout not what is around you...you'd be better off.

    Oh an btw the title sucks..."to the fatty..." WTF...
    Does exercising with no rest between sets work for you?

    When I lift, I notice things around me. When I rest, I notice things around me. When I walk, I notice things around me. Nice to know I've been "exercising" incorrectly all this time.

    Your post is about as cringe-inducing as the original one.

    When you are exercising do you notice them enough to write a FB post about the fatties?

    I have rests between sets but not long ones...and where did I say anyone was exercising incorrectly...I said if people spent less time noticing everything around them and more energy on their workout they would be better off.

    it's funny how people read into things so much(exercising incorrectly)...*smh*

    Stef, I know what you mean, and believe me, when I'm doing intervals on the treadmill I'm very focused.

    However? If orgasm noise man gets on the treadmill next to me? (There's a guy in my gym who makes sex noises ... LOUD sex noises... when he runs) Yes, I could write a post about that.

    and this is why I have my music on and earbuds... that would be distracting...

    auditory distractions are hard to get past...visual eh...head down and away we go.
  • mbaker566
    mbaker566 Posts: 11,233 Member
    while poorly written, I do appreciate the intention behind the original letter. he was just giving a big thumbs up to a person he saw trying to better himself.
    the response was overreactive and defensive.
  • JPW1990
    JPW1990 Posts: 2,424 Member
    I don't believe their intentions were good or they would have had a few words of encouragement and a quick natter as he passed, not make a full on FB post about it.

    And how disrespectful to address it "To the fatty", why not to the person wearing xxxx today on the track at xx:xxPM.

    That's really what it comes down to. That initial post wasn't made to inspire anyone. It was made so the poster could make sure as many people as possible saw them being "compassionate" and tell them how awesome they were for writing it.
  • jkal1979
    jkal1979 Posts: 1,896 Member
    ReeseG4350 wrote: »
    I really hate the original. How nauseatingly patronizing. Guess what, I don't need to be "inspired", I inspire myself. And the fact that whoever composed this thought it was at all appropriate to bring up the other person's weight shows how skewed their thinking is.
    The whole thing just reinforces the idea that fat people are only acceptable if they obviously are working their *** off to fight it and are miserable in the process.

    Do you turn away when you pass someone else on the running track? Probably not. You ARE sure of yourself, and congratulations. The Westview runner looks away when passing other runners, suggesting that person, to at least some extent, is less so.

    "Bringing up the other person's weight"? Do you suppose anybody there, most especially Westview Runner, is not aware that this person is overweight and, in all probability, the heaviest person on the track? If you believe the post reinforces the idea that fat people are miserable it, again, reflects more on the perceiver than the perception. What I see the author of that original post saying is that s/he recognizes the effort and congratulates that effort. S/he is telling Runner to raise his/her head and be proud of the efforts more than ashamed of the weight. Runner IS ashamed. Runner looks down, looks away when other runners pass. SOMEONE has made Runner believe that the weight identifies him/her and that IS who Runner is. The Westview Writer, on the other hand is trying to convey to Runner that this is not true. That Runner is, indeed, more than the sum of the scales. Westview Writer says to Runner, "You are more than that. Congratulations on your efforts. Be proud of who you are and don't let anyone put you down. I, for one, am on your side."

    To me, the most telling statement is the fact that this Runner is ashamed, looks away, looks down. That bespeaks a person who does feel some shame about who they are. Westview Writer was probably just trying to lend a hand of friendship. Maybe Writer had to walk/run off a couple hundred pounds and wants to be able to share Runner's journey, if only Runner would look their way.

    I tend to look down when I run. No shame, just concentrating on what I'm doing and making sure that I'm not coming up on something that will make me trip and fall.
  • SezxyStef
    SezxyStef Posts: 15,267 Member
    moyer566 wrote: »
    while poorly written, I do appreciate the intention behind the original letter. he was just giving a big thumbs up to a person he saw trying to better himself.
    the response was overreactive and defensive.
    how would you like a post on FB about you titled "Fatty....."

    It was a slap in the face if it was meant as inspiration etc...fatty wouldn't have come into play
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