Binge Eating................ How to stop the emotional roller coaster?

See if this metaphor helps, "riding the elephant". I've blogged about it several times.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/jgnatca/view/riding-the-elephant-736034

Imagine your subconscious as the elephant, and your rational self as the rider. If the elephant decides it's gonna do what it's gonna do, that's where you are going! The trick is to make peace with your elephant. Allow treats in guardedly, slowly, without guilt or fear. As soon as your elephant is convinced you're not going to starve it to death, you can come to a reconciliation.

Not that our subconscious is bad. I credit it for romance and falling in love as well as other spontaneous decisions. If rationalism were in charge of our love-life, few of us would ever get married...or have children!

Oh, I've been riding this elephant for a while. I talk to it in quiet moments when we're both at peace. When the elephant is stampeding, reasoning takes a back seat. Wait it out and work on it again. The trick is to look for signs of unrest and head it off before it gets out of control. Once you are in for the ride, hang on.

See, I'm trying to prevent the pattern of repeated failure from trying to halt a stampeding elephant. Here's another list to try if you are determined to stop it mid-way. One tip is to physically put your hand out and say "STOP" (never worked for me)! Another is to tell yourself that you will indulge in "ten minutes". You may even set the timer. You aren't depriving yourself, just delaying gratification. It's supposed to build up your self control. This one hasn't been terribly effective for me either.

http://www.myfitnesspal.com/blog/jgnatca/view/halting-a-binge-session-715131

Remember the adage to count to ten? There's some science behind it. There is a time delay before the frontal lobes are engaged. If you can get a person to breathe deeply or count to ten before undertaking a rash action, rationalism has a chance to take over, and offer alternatives to finishing off two rows of Oreos.

What has worked is to allow myself whatever I crave in appropriate amounts. Like five Brookside chocolates. I don't wait too long. I've got a restless elephant to take care of.

^ You should listen to the advice of persons who have experienced what you're experiencing and have at least some success with overcoming their issues!

It sounds to me like you either hold the view that taking charge of your binge-eating is so difficult that it will be almost impossible and you're kind of self-defeated at the outset, or that you have some method in mind (eating extremely "clean"? getting rid of all trigger foods?) that you want someone to validate so you can feel confident in doing it.

Trust me, you don't want to kill your subconscious. It carries your gut instincts, helps you come to decisions, and allows you to fall in love. Come to peace with it. Indulge a little in your "clean" phase. Come down off your binge sooner.

I'm offering a way to integrate your personality. Why would you want to punch out your depressed self? Sounds like he needs a hug.

Charlie003 wrote: »

royaldrea wrote: »

^ You should listen to the advice of persons who have experienced what you're experiencing and have at least some success with overcoming their issues!

It sounds to me like you either hold the view that taking charge of your binge-eating is so difficult that it will be almost impossible and you're kind of self-defeated at the outset, or that you have some method in mind (eating extremely "clean"? getting rid of all trigger foods?) that you want someone to validate so you can feel confident in doing it.

The thing is, I hold no view either way. It just happens. Sneaks up on me. I can get rid of the food, but I order in, the food comes to me. I would be lying if I said that I was a well rounded individual. When the fog hits, it hits. I need to find a way to punch through the fog and hit back. Depression makes for bad decision making, and I will not go on pills to level out and become a zombie. I have an Iron Will when balanced, off kilter, need a leash.

I agree with @jgnatca. Love yourself, don't fight yourself! Let your starting point be a place of love and not loathing. This sounds very zen and hippie-ish but it's so true. It makes such a difference.

Short term: Reduce your exposure to those foods you have a weakness for. Get them out of the house. No, it doesn't solve the issue of self control, however, it makes binge eating that much more difficult. Part of self control is knowing your limits.

Long term: Find out why you are triggered by these foods. At one hospital I worked, I became friendly with a nutritionist and a psychologist. Long story short (this will probably be perceived as flaky), after speaking at length to both of them, it was explained to me that unhealthy eating eating habits are classic regression psychology. When you are sad or stressed the the enormously complex electrochemical reactions in your brain react to reduce this. It's your brain that harbors your memories, your emotions, and also the neural processes that manage your digestion and metabolism. It's all connected in the gray pudding up there. So, when you feel sad, your brain looks back and says what has historically made me feel better. Well, when we were good kids, dad bought us donuts and made food easy for us. I felt loved and happy then, and I deserve too now, maybe it will work now. Sadly, it wasn't good then and it's not good now. However, the electroneural pathways in our brains have made ruts in our brains by constant reinforcement and are hard to change.

If possible, start to think of food as simple fuel and not as an instrument for soothing negative emotions. It's WAY easier said than done, however.

Take it or leave it. Someone will be along shortly to discount this as touchy-feely crap and just say you don't have enough will power or just don't want it enough.

Hi Charlie, everything you've written resonates nearly exactly with my experience.

I also am chronically depressed, but choose to abstain from medication because I don't want to lose all sense of who I am. I, too, waver between bouts of iron will (meeting calorie and exercise goals, eating and avoiding the "right" and "wrong" foods) and helpless binge eating.

The binge eating is triggered by my emotional state - when I'm anxious or unhappy, I'll eat EVERYTHING in reach (sugar, simple carbohydrates, protein, or fat in that order), well beyond the feeling of full or satiation. I'll be stuffed and sick and still eating, because I'm eating to affect the chemicals in my brain and bring them to a place of calm. I don't purge, I just feel disgusted later and usually respond by sticking to my healthy plan with a vengeance...for a few days, until the next binge.

Just because I rationally understand my binges doesn't mean I can control them. Here's what has helped me, though, and maybe could help you too:

• Eliminate things in your environment that don't serve you. The toxic foods and beverages that you know you love to binge on. Delete the takeout numbers from your phone and throw away the menus. Make a list before grocery shopping and make it a competitive shopping trip - get in and get the hell out. There's no time to browse the chip and soda aisles!!
• Get support from family members and friends. Tell them you need a little help. Ask them to support you and not ask you to go out for pizza (can we go somewhere with more options instead?) or keep certain foods in the house where you'll find them.
• Get professional support, if you can. Talking to a therapist can help you find peace with yourself and relieve some of the internal pressures that lead to binges.
• Focus on discipline - doing what you don't want to do, because you know you should. If it's too overwhelming to address everything all at once, pick one thing. "Today I will not eat candy, because I said I wouldn't, and I keep my word." Start by keeping little promises to yourself the way you would keep them to others.
• Exercise does wonder for the body and mind, especially with depression. I can't make myself get outside every day and go for a run or walk or yoga class, but when I do, I never regret it.

I barely have my own life under control, so I shouldn't be offering advice, but your post really speaks to me because we're going through the same things. There is no easy answer to binge eating, but hopefully one or two of these suggestions could be helpful to you in your journey.