Has long term constant effort at weight loss made eating "normal" impossible for anyone else?

I have never been thin. I was a chubby kid, followed by an overweight teenager and adult. I had lost weight in the past and put it back on. About 5 years ago I started with Weight Watchers and lost 60lbs. Figured out the loop holes in weight watchers after I no longer had to count fruit and veggies and hit a plateau. That's when I started using MFP. I lost some additional weight early on and then have mostly maintained/slowly losing over the last year or so. Here's my issue..I participated in a weight loss challenge last summer which ended in September. I lost 12 pounds was just 8 pounds from goal weight. I was feeling super energized and recharged. Then the holidays came, then I changed jobs and went from working 10 hour day shifts Tuesday-Friday to working 12 hour night shifts working Friday-Sunday. I know that the changes are not helping me any, but the real problem is, I am either spot on great with staying in my goals...or, i am shoving food in faster than I can probably even taste it. I don't ever remember eating like that before. I am way worse after my 3 night shifts. Its like I can't cram enough carbohydrates into my body. But even when I'm not sleep deprived, its like I have 2 speeds. 1) Staying within my goals and eating reasonable and 2) stuff myself so that I'm literally feeling ill. Its like I forgot how to "just" overeat. Its really frustrating because I am getting so discouraged. I don't know if its just adjustment phase still to going to Nights in January or if all these years of "dieting" has screwed my mindset up. Keep in mind, I try very hard not to use the term dieting and look at it as a lifestyle change but it is what is and we all know it.
I'm just terrified to wake up that 230 lb person again.