This is my last chance.

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lxsaps
lxsaps Posts: 181 Member
in Introduce Yourself
Hello, I've only been using MFP for only a week and so far I love it. I have more energy, im more alert and most importantly, im getting healthy!

So im guessing some of you are wondering why this is my last chance? Let me explain, ive had several half assed failed attempts to lose weight and although I would loose 5lbs or so I would eventually just give up. My wife has always been supportive of my attempts (she is relatively healthy) but recently we had a very emotional and very honest discussion and it was eye opening for me. I didnt realize how much my weight effected my spouse. She told me I lost confidence in my self and that I have low self a steam but most painful of all, she wasn't attracted to me anymore. This was heartbreaking. She is my High school sweetheart and we have 2 children together. My first thought is why couldn't she love me for who I am? But it wasnt until later that night that I realized this isnt who I am. Im not the fit young man she met in HS, im not the slim Man she married, im not even the man from 5 years ago. Im an over weight, lazy, set in his sofa laying TV watching ways. And I truly believe if I don't change, I could lose my wife.

So, im here to make a permanent change and get back to the man she used to be attracted to. Yes, im doing this for my marriage but im also doing it for myself. My short term goal is to get to 200lbs (im 230lbs now) and long term is 175lbs. I know i'll do it, nothing lights a fire under your *kitten* like the woman you love tell you that she isn't attracted to you anymore. So im maintaining a 1500 calorie a day goal and im handling it just fine. Im working out daily and I already feel better. She is as always, supportive of my weight loss and is helping me to reach my goal. This will happen, ive never had this feeling of wanting to succeed as much as I do with this, im 100% dedicated to my weight loss.

Although she never said "this is your last chance" that's how I feel about it. It's that fear that is driving me to fight.

So now that i've aired my drama all over the interweb and completely humiliated myself, I could use support and I would be happy to give support to anyone who needs it.

Thanks for reading!

Replies

  • itsnota400
    itsnota400 Posts: 10 Member
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    Keep it up! I need the support too.
  • lovelyhulett
    lovelyhulett Posts: 37 Member
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    Wow sounds kinda like my story. I had a dancer body when I met my husband but after health issues and my daughter I stopped working out. We're all here to get fit. Stay motivated and do this for YOU.
  • Commander_Keen
    Commander_Keen Posts: 1,181 Member
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    Hey, here is my two cents. Go for the small goals. That will keep you motivated. Get your your self a trainer. You know your going to go to the gym when its $50 on the line for a trainer
  • victoria863
    victoria863 Posts: 7 Member
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    Good on you for facing it, its hard to be so honest with yourself. And good on your wife for having the courage to tell you, my husband is my biggest supporter exercise wise but a nightmare with sabotaging my healthy eating! He only told me since ive lost weight that he finds me more attractive now.
    go for it! :D
  • Carbaholic672
    Carbaholic672 Posts: 1 Member
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    I'm fairly new to this site as well but I've found that for me to lose weight, tracking is key! If you continue to monitor your calories, along with carbs and protein you'll see continual weight loss. I've dropped almost 40lbs in a little over 5 months. I've hit a couple of plateaus along the way too and found that I wasn't tracking as faithfully as I could've been doing and I was over my daily carb intake as well. Once I started tracking again and mixing up my diet and monitoring my carbs I started losing again.

    Just remember everyone is different in how our bodies respond to weight loss and that any progress is still progress! My advice is to take it one day at a time since we didn't gain this over night and celebrate any loss even if it's just a couple of ounces or inches, and maintaining is also better than gaining. If you have a day where you decided to splurge then that's alright just start back on track again the next day and give yourself a reprieve for the night instead of feelng guilty.

    Keep it up and you will get there!!!
  • lxsaps
    lxsaps Posts: 181 Member
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    Carbaholic672 wrote: »
    I'm fairly new to this site as well but I've found that for me to lose weight, tracking is key! If you continue to monitor your calories, along with carbs and protein you'll see continual weight loss. I've dropped almost 40lbs in a little over 5 months. I've hit a couple of plateaus along the way too and found that I wasn't tracking as faithfully as I could've been doing and I was over my daily carb intake as well. Once I started tracking again and mixing up my diet and monitoring my carbs I started losing again.

    Just remember everyone is different in how our bodies respond to weight loss and that any progress is still progress! My advice is to take it one day at a time since we didn't gain this over night and celebrate any loss even if it's just a couple of ounces or inches, and maintaining is also better than gaining. If you have a day where you decided to splurge then that's alright just start back on track again the next day and give yourself a reprieve for the night instead of feelng guilty.

    Keep it up and you will get there!!!

    Thank you and congratulations on losing 40lbs!
  • Bshmerlie
    Bshmerlie Posts: 1,026 Member
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    Yeah in my college days when I met my spouse I was literally half the weight that I grew to. I was athletic, lifted weights, sports...you name it we did it. But then life happened. I got a well paying job that required me to work long hours, weekends and business trips. Then along came a baby. Over the years the activity stopped and as a result we both started gaining weight. Twenty years later we both came to realization that something had to change. We weren't the same people anymore. Like you said sitting around and watching TV. Well now I am tired of being sick and tired. My wife has lost 75 pounds and I've lost 33 pounds. We are both more active now and getting out there and doing things again. Life is still there. The long hours...the kid....but we just make the time. Sometimes your health has to be a priority too.
  • DLinnell58
    DLinnell58 Posts: 87 Member
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    I hear ya, my friend. Been there. My goal is 200 lbs as well, with a 1550 cal goal per day. Lets be friends and do this!!!!
  • lxsaps
    lxsaps Posts: 181 Member
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    Bshmerlie wrote: »
    Yeah in my college days when I met my spouse I was literally half the weight that I grew to. I was athletic, lifted weights, sports...you name it we did it. But then life happened. I got a well paying job that required me to work long hours, weekends and business trips. Then along came a baby. Over the years the activity stopped and as a result we both started gaining weight. Twenty years later we both came to realization that something had to change. We weren't the same people anymore. Like you said sitting around and watching TV. Well now I am tired of being sick and tired. My wife has lost 75 pounds and I've lost 33 pounds. We are both more active now and getting out there and doing things again. Life is still there. The long hours...the kid....but we just make the time. Sometimes your health has to be a priority too.

    I can relate to this. Life gets in the way.
  • lxsaps
    lxsaps Posts: 181 Member
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    DLinnell58 wrote: »
    I hear ya, my friend. Been there. My goal is 200 lbs as well, with a 1550 cal goal per day. Lets be friends and do this!!!!

    Awesome, lets do it!

  • cragglecat
    cragglecat Posts: 58 Member
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    Brutally honest post. I've been up and down with my weight. Currently back at 230 lbs and, like you, realising I've got to do something about it. My wife hasn't said anything but you do not have to be Sherlock Holmes to realise I may not be looking my best.... Feel free to add me, im back here after success a couple of years ago. MFP works if you can keep the discipline of logging.
  • lxsaps
    lxsaps Posts: 181 Member
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    cragglecat wrote: »
    Brutally honest post. I've been up and down with my weight. Currently back at 230 lbs and, like you, realising I've got to do something about it. My wife hasn't said anything but you do not have to be Sherlock Holmes to realise I may not be looking my best.... Feel free to add me, im back here after success a couple of years ago. MFP works if you can keep the discipline of logging.

    Thanks' i'll do that.

  • lxsaps
    lxsaps Posts: 181 Member
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    lovelyhulett wrote: »
    Wow sounds kinda like my story. I had a dancer body when I met my husband but after health issues and my daughter I stopped working out. We're all here to get fit. Stay motivated and do this for YOU.

    Thank you!
  • arizonavol
    arizonavol Posts: 1 Member
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    lxsaps, please add me as a friend. I coach sports and I am a teacher. I am good at providing support and getting people motivated. The key for me has been to have a date by which you want to reach a certain goal. Like, I knew I was going to turn 50 in six months (6 months ago), so I decided I'd like to lose 15 pounds by then. I did it. Like I tell my students who anxiously look around when others start handing in their tests, "it's the tortoise that wins the race". Take your time. Have a goal set and keep working toward it each day. I'd like to give you some support along the way.
  • lxsaps
    lxsaps Posts: 181 Member
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    arizonavol wrote: »
    lxsaps, please add me as a friend. I coach sports and I am a teacher. I am good at providing support and getting people motivated. The key for me has been to have a date by which you want to reach a certain goal. Like, I knew I was going to turn 50 in six months (6 months ago), so I decided I'd like to lose 15 pounds by then. I did it. Like I tell my students who anxiously look around when others start handing in their tests, "it's the tortoise that wins the race". Take your time. Have a goal set and keep working toward it each day. I'd like to give you some support along the way.

    Thanks, I will do that.
  • lxsaps
    lxsaps Posts: 181 Member
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    Just thought I would update everyone who's read my story. Ive lost 11 lbs in 3 weeks and my wife has been my biggest supporter. We have since become closer in our relationship and I believe that the positive changes I've made in my life have impacted her. She tells me everyday on how proud she is of me, at that alone is worth every early morning run and beed of sweat I've produced. I hope to update as I get closer to my goal weight.

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