body dysmorphia??

mizukikuro
mizukikuro Posts: 42 Member
edited November 21 in Health and Weight Loss
I have just brought new clothes and I am now a size 14. All through the trip I kept picking up size 18/20 thinking these would fit me and I would see a size 14 and think 'No way I can fit into that!' Anyway it turns out I do and brought all the clothes. Looking at them now I still think I can't fit into them and that I look terrible, I tried them on again and all I can see is my old body even though it's not there?! I should be happy that I can fit I to a size 14 but instead I cry because I don't feel like I look good enough for them... I need help conquering this because I honestly don't know what to do...

Replies

  • WBB55
    WBB55 Posts: 4,131 Member
    Time. Have people take pictures of you, and then look at the pictures and recognize the person in them as yourself. Years and years later I still see pictures of myself and think "who's that skinny woman sitting next to mom?" and then realize it's me and it's what I look like.
  • jemhh
    jemhh Posts: 14,261 Member
    It can take quite a while for the reality of your new look/size to sink in. Last fall I was shopping for a jacket and picked up an XL and my husband shook his head, grabbed it back, and handed me an M. The one he gave me fit perfectly but I never would have though it would. What's the timeline of your weight loss? It sounds like it has been fairly recent, which to me makes it seem like it is reasonable that you still are having a bit of a problem "seeing" it in the mirror. I don't think I'd worry about it being true body dysmorphia yet but keep working on accepting your new look.
  • ManiacalLaugh
    ManiacalLaugh Posts: 1,048 Member
    edited July 2015
    A counselor might be something you'd want to look into. It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. In fact, based on other threads, I think this is a common issue. A counselor will help your mind catch up to the changes in your body though. Weight loss is as much of a head game for some people as it is in the body.

    If it makes you feel any better, I did the same thing just a few days ago. I had to order some uniform-like pants for a work event ASAP, so I bought a certain size thinking "I don't want to spend time squeezing into a pair and I know these will fit." They were huge. I didn't have the time to return them, so I was stuck with what looked like a potato-sack around my hips and butt. If I'd had more confidence in myself, I would've ordered the smaller size and they probably would've looked a lot better.
  • mizukikuro
    mizukikuro Posts: 42 Member
    Thanks everyone! It's nice to know people have the same issue and it's pretty common. I've lost 83 pounds in 9 months. I'm still over weight but I'm not obese like I used to be. I really just can't comprehend it.
  • sofaking6
    sofaking6 Posts: 4,589 Member
    I was still buying size 8 when I was size 12 then fuming when they didn't fit...brains are weird!!!
  • Bshmerlie
    Bshmerlie Posts: 1,026 Member
    I've lost 35 pounds, my shorts are falling off, and I don't want to buy new clothes until I'm done losing weight. But that doens't make sense because I plan on losing 125 pounds in total. My clothes are going to look rediculous by that point. And even though I know this and I'm aware I still haven't bought anything new because I don't want to waste the money. It takes awhile for our brains to catch up to our bodies.
  • BWBTrish
    BWBTrish Posts: 2,817 Member
    i went from XXXL ( 28) to now 10 in about 8.5 month ( almost 100 pounds)

    I am never hungry, i eat a good balanced diet ( i eat it all) I work hard for it, but dont find it really hard. Never lack of motivation, or having gravings etc.

    But there are two things that need to catch up my brains.
    Indeed shopping the wrong sizes, and can not believe i fit in there.
    Wandering over the plus size departments ( still)

    And the feeling of getting use to wearing rings again, which i got for my 18th birthday and couldn't wear anymore. My wedding ring ( the second one btw because the first one was to big too after some time) falling again of my finger. And not buying a new one again till i am at my desired weight.

    Really weird sometimes lol
  • laread25
    laread25 Posts: 4 Member
    Bshmerlie wrote: »
    I've lost 35 pounds, my shorts are falling off, and I don't want to buy new clothes until I'm done losing weight. But that doens't make sense because I plan on losing 125 pounds in total. My clothes are going to look rediculous by that point. And even though I know this and I'm aware I still haven't bought anything new because I don't want to waste the money. It takes awhile for our brains to catch up to our bodies.

    Use a sewing machine to easily take in your clothes as you change sizes. Might save you some money until you are finished losing weight.
  • ManiacalLaugh
    ManiacalLaugh Posts: 1,048 Member
    TheOwlhouseDesigns wrote: »


    But there are two things that need to catch up my brains.
    Indeed shopping the wrong sizes, and can not believe i fit in there.
    Wandering over the plus size departments ( still)

    All the time. All the freaking time. At least it's better than when I was between departments. That was an awkward phase. Burned a lot of calories running from one end of the store to the other, though.
    TheOwlhouseDesigns wrote: »
    My wedding ring ( the second one btw because the first one was to big too after some time) falling again of my finger. And not buying a new one again till i am at my desired weight.

    Aw, those are pricey! Can you not have it resized?
  • minties82
    minties82 Posts: 907 Member
    I feel similar, though it's starting to improve. I have gone from a (uk/aus/nz) size 24/26 to a 16/18 depending on the brand. I have a few things in size 14 that fit too. I still reach for the 20-somethings and they are gigantic but it's hard to think otherwise.

    I am stubbornly still wearing some size 18 jeans even though they are baggy. I can stick my arms down in them when they are on they are so loose. But the 16s look too small to my brain.
  • BWBTrish
    BWBTrish Posts: 2,817 Member
    ManiacalLaugh wrote: »
    TheOwlhouseDesigns wrote: »


    But there are two things that need to catch up my brains.
    Indeed shopping the wrong sizes, and can not believe i fit in there.
    Wandering over the plus size departments ( still)

    All the time. All the freaking time. At least it's better than when I was between departments. That was an awkward phase. Burned a lot of calories running from one end of the store to the other, though.
    TheOwlhouseDesigns wrote: »
    My wedding ring ( the second one btw because the first one was to big too after some time) falling again of my finger. And not buying a new one again till i am at my desired weight.

    Aw, those are pricey! Can you not have it resized?

    yes i think we do that. But i wait till i am sure my fingers getting any thinner lol

  • crazyjerseygirl
    crazyjerseygirl Posts: 1,252 Member
    It's pretty common I think. I see a social worker and she told be to print out 3 pics. The weight I am, the weight I want to be and smack in the middle.

    Turns out I look more like what I thought was "middle"

    So long as you're aware you should be ok!
  • zoeysasha37
    zoeysasha37 Posts: 7,088 Member
    I still walk straight to the plus size dept even though I'm a size 4 now. Sometimes it takes a while for the brain to catch up.
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,626 Member
    I'm a 14/16 now down from a 22.

    I still dont SEE it. i KNOW it, but I dont SEE it. LOL
  • Kalikel
    Kalikel Posts: 9,603 Member
    edited July 2015
    I saw very little for the first 60 pounds. Now, I'm really starting to see it because bones are appearing where bones hadn't been seen in over 30 years.

    There's a bit of a brain lag. Kind of like a Dysmorphia, but not really. Not like anorexics and muscle dysmorphics have. I just have been so very fat for so very long that I think it's hard to keep up, so I don't see myself as I am sometimes and can't get used to how big I am, especially when it comes to clothes. Plus, we all see ourselves every day, so there is never a huge change from one day to the next.

    It's not like we can even get used to it because just as we are settling into thinking of ourself as one size, BAM! We are now the next size down.

    I think that once we reach the end of our journeys, we will take a little time and settle into our new and improved bodies. Hope so, anyway! :)
  • Eri0515
    Eri0515 Posts: 85 Member
    Bshmerlie wrote: »
    I've lost 35 pounds, my shorts are falling off, and I don't want to buy new clothes until I'm done losing weight. But that doens't make sense because I plan on losing 125 pounds in total. My clothes are going to look rediculous by that point. And even though I know this and I'm aware I still haven't bought anything new because I don't want to waste the money. It takes awhile for our brains to catch up to our bodies.

    Try shopping either garage sales, goodwill shops or thrift stores. Sometimes you can get really good deals at those places for some pretty nice clothes, some even still have the tags on! These can be your lower cost transitional clothes so you won't have to spend a bundle on things you don't plan on keeping.
  • Teamhynes
    Teamhynes Posts: 31 Member
    I've lost about 35lbs since January. Took our son back to the same amusement park we were at New Year's Eve for the 4th. I've always been afraid to get in the rides with him, but knew I'd lost weight, was working out, etc. so I figured go for it. Hopped in with plenty of room to spare!

    I think sometimes my head is stuck in how far I still have to go vs. how far I've already come and that affects how I see myself. Especially in comparison to others.
  • PAV8888
    PAV8888 Posts: 14,254 Member
    mizukikuro wrote: »
    Thanks everyone! It's nice to know people have the same issue and it's pretty common. I've lost 83 pounds in 9 months. I'm still over weight but I'm not obese like I used to be. I really just can't comprehend it.

    You should be looking at this as a NSV

    People walking by me in a doorway? Seriously? Can't they see that *I* am occupying the doorway?

    Similarly the hostess who wanted me to navigate though a slew of tightly packed tables. I mean how could I possibly squeeze through...

    Let's not mention the pair of pants I've been wearing this past month. Every morning I eye that opening and wonder which single leg I'll be able to fit in there ;-)
  • Liftng4Lis
    Liftng4Lis Posts: 15,151 Member
    Awesome work! Patience is key here, it will catch up.
  • mizukikuro
    mizukikuro Posts: 42 Member
    Love reading the stories haha! You have all come so far and we all do the same things when shopping :smile: really cheered me up
  • callsitlikeiseeit
    callsitlikeiseeit Posts: 8,626 Member
    PAV8888 wrote: »
    mizukikuro wrote: »
    Thanks everyone! It's nice to know people have the same issue and it's pretty common. I've lost 83 pounds in 9 months. I'm still over weight but I'm not obese like I used to be. I really just can't comprehend it.



    Let's not mention the pair of pants I've been wearing this past month. Every morning I eye that opening and wonder which single leg I'll be able to fit in there ;-)

    i SO feel that way with my jeans now! I've started to toss them in my daughters laundry pile several times before realizing - wait- those are MINE! LOLOL!
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