Too thin. you've got to stop remarks.

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  • lyl55
    lyl55 Posts: 1 Member
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    It's YOUR body! Never apologise and never explain!
  • MamaBirdBoss
    MamaBirdBoss Posts: 1,516 Member
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    165 is overweight. You are nowhere CLOSE to too thin. She's being a snot because you're making her feel bad about herself.

    So just tell her that you want to be a healthy weight and body composition, and it might be strange for her to see you looking healthier, but that you are going this for your health and not other people's comfort.

    I wouldn't be much nicer than that.
  • MamaBirdBoss
    MamaBirdBoss Posts: 1,516 Member
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    Oh, and you could just look at her, stare, and say, "You realize I'm 40 pounds away from being underweight, right?"
  • whmscll
    whmscll Posts: 2,254 Member
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    Or just ask her bluntly why she keeps asking about this? When you have already answered the same questions already.
  • playmadcats
    playmadcats Posts: 199 Member
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    Thank you all. I know I look thinner than 6 months back, but I'm hardly skinny. I'm not even particularly looking for a thin look. Just healthy (slightly athletic would be nice but its not be all or end all, as I do play tennis and I am not confident enough for shorts or tennis dress).

    It just shows how things balance out though. Leaving the gym today I bumped into a member I hadn't seen for about 5-6 months. She did double take and then enquired about my weight loss (we did a balanced nutrition course about two years ago, together). She couldn't stop going on about how pleased she was for me and how great she thought I looked.
  • kalegria24
    kalegria24 Posts: 34 Member
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    You can always go with the (often revealing), "Why do you ask?" or "What makes you say that?" It gently turns it back on her and could open a dialog about HER issues (Much more fun to discuss than ones own :) ). I got some of that from my sister-in-law and realized that she'd never seen me that thin (5'8" and 165!!!) and so was upset to see my collarbones. Just wasn't used to that on me. I was delighted to see them :) Hugs to you and good luck on your continued journey to good health!
  • tapirfrog
    tapirfrog Posts: 616 Member
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    Wow, if she's saying that your doctor doesn't know anything, the Cray is strong with this one.

    Yeah, just shut it down. Doesn't matter if you and she do volunteer work together -- in fact, that's more of a reason to shut it down. You spend time with this weirdo, so you have to delineate what's okay behavior.

    "I won't discuss this subject any more with you. Bye!" [click] Broken-record that (do it over and over) for as long as it takes. And if she doesn't stop, approach your supervisor with "Jane is phoning me with comments about my weight. She's been doing it X times a week since X date. Here's the log" (obviously you'll have to start keeping a log). "I'd like to work a different shift from her. She's creeping me out."

    And I'm really glad SOMEONE is being encouraging and supportive, and, you know, not bat-spit crazy.
  • SweetPeasMom55
    SweetPeasMom55 Posts: 3,385 Member
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    My coworker always attempted to bring up weight and I say Whatever it pisses her off every time I say Whatever. So now she stopped bringing up my diet and exercising.
  • playmadcats
    playmadcats Posts: 199 Member
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    Generally most people around me are supportive. I'm sure the other two ladies who commented negatively are just following what she is saying. Sadly I don't have chance to do shifts away from her as we run events together so I can't avoid her totally. But will certainly be stopping her from having further attempts at bringing subject up.
  • MKEgal
    MKEgal Posts: 3,250 Member
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    #1 - "Thank you for your concern."
    #2 - Change subject.
    Repeat #2 as necessary, until she gets the hint that you're not going to respond to her comments
    about your weight.
    Or just walk away.

    .
    The next time it happens, be direct: "Jane, I do not appreciate comments about my diet,
    my weight, or my body. They make me uncomfortable, it's none of your business, and I want
    you to stop making them."
    Every subsequent instance, disengage, remind, and then, if they won't stop, end the call or
    literally get up and leave.
    Yep.

    .
    seska wrote:
    Tell her that weight loss is a subject that you just don't want to discuss anymore.
    After that, say "Hmm" or just ignore that she said anything about it.
    If she asks if you are listening to her, tell her no.
    I like this too.
  • MKEgal
    MKEgal Posts: 3,250 Member
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    The only person I've had make that comment to me meant it as a compliment.
    (Ex-boyfriend's dad.)
    I told him I'm just getting healthy, have a little more to go, and am feeling great.
  • fitmap73
    fitmap73 Posts: 19 Member
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    MamaBirdBoss is correct, this is about her not you. When you succeed in losing weight it challenges her own comfort about why she's still fat. Misery loves company! She's toxic and cut her out of your life.
  • ohmscheeks
    ohmscheeks Posts: 840 Member
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    Whenever she started on the topic, I would say "Ok, stop obsessing over my weight. It isn't healthy, sweetie," and change the subject. It wouldn't last for much longer. ;)
  • Cortneyrenee04
    Cortneyrenee04 Posts: 1,117 Member
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    You could find something to say about her weight... Then maybe she would realize how wildly inappropriate she's been towards you.