"It is a waste of time...

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...and money you going to the gym. You're still fat."
"But I've lost well over a stone, its quite a lot."
"You're still fat"

Helpful comment from a so called friend yesterday afternoon.

It almost made me cry. To be fair, yes, i am still 5lb off a BMI of 25. And a fair way more off getting somewhere nearer the middle. But 25.9 is hardly horrific. And totally better than 29.2 which is where i started at.
My lung capacity it awesome for my age alone, never mind that i smoke. Blood pressure is lower. Sleeping better. As well as many many other benefits to doing exercise.

But that doesn't matter since I'm still fat.

Think it's time to re evaluate my friends rather than my activities...

And i did go to the gym yesterday. Twice.

Replies

  • FitnessTrainer69
    FitnessTrainer69 Posts: 283 Member
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    TIP- Only worry about what you can control. Do the best you can do and build your own confidence. Screw what anyone else says. Change your life for you and you only
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 17,959 Member
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    How much does your friend weigh? Coz I can give you a tip on how to lose exactly that much by performing 15 seconds of one easy exercise:

    bird-flip-o.gif
  • Louz163
    Louz163 Posts: 243 Member
    edited July 2015
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    Defo lose the friend, my bmi is currently 26.3 aiming to hit 25 to be classed as ideal weight ( so well done you ) my friends are telling me i look great & my weight will just be a few pounds more than urself so no ur not fat your healthy & well done losing over a stone
  • bunnywestley81
    bunnywestley81 Posts: 178 Member
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    Yep!

    I just don't think it is acceptable to speak to someone like that.
    His excuse is "its the truth"

    Truth is...i haven't been doing so great lately. But I didn't pile it all back on as usual (4-7lb up but still 19lb down from start) and I'm getting back to it.

    Truth is.... he can go f*** himself up the bottom with barbed wire. Think he's just annoyed as the more busy I am with things like the gym the less time i have to speak with him.

    I just may be super busy for the rest of my life...
  • Snowmaiden58
    Snowmaiden58 Posts: 5 Member
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    Bunny you need to keep going - do not worry about what others say. You are the one person who can make a difference.

    It is a long road - the gym is the one thing that keeps me going. Learnt to ski last year so going again to Snow this year. I am 108kgs - but am determined to consolidate my learning from last year. Since September 12 have lost 15 kgs.

    One more thing you are most likely more fitter than your friend.
  • FitnessTrainer69
    FitnessTrainer69 Posts: 283 Member
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    You do you and don't let others stand in your way.
  • bunnywestley81
    bunnywestley81 Posts: 178 Member
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    ThePie13 wrote: »
    Bunny you need to keep going - do not worry about what others say. You are the one person who can make a difference.

    It is a long road - the gym is the one thing that keeps me going. Learnt to ski last year so going again to Snow this year. I am 108kgs - but am determined to consolidate my learning from last year. Since September 12 have lost 15 kgs.

    One more thing you are most likely more fitter than your friend.

    This person is definitely not as fit as me (and I'd not consider me anything awesome). Is idle rich. Spends all day eating and lying in bed watching documentarys.
    Recently asked for help to lose weight then pitched a fit when i tried to explain about calories.

    Looks like i just lost about 15 stone... hahaha!!
  • deladypilot
    deladypilot Posts: 618 Member
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    Sounds like your friend is jealous and does not know how to handle the new you. Some people are so afraid of losing someone when they become healthy. Unfortunately sometimes we have to cut people out of our lives. If they can not accept you for you, then they really arent your friend to begin with.

    I agree with Fitness. You need to concentrate on you and be the best you, you can be. Do not let someone else dictate how you feel about yourself. You are worth the time.
  • bunnywestley81
    bunnywestley81 Posts: 178 Member
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    I think a major factor may be jealousy.

    I have awesome friends and family, a superb partner, I'm a busy social butterfly! He is 40, lives with his dad and watches tv in bed all day.
    Mostly I've kept speaking to him because i feel sorry for him and I've offered advice when asked but it's excuses excuses...

    And there have been many horrible personal comments such as that one just recently. I've known this person online for 10 years but true colours seem to be showing...

    I may be fat but i can and will do something about it! That kinda ugly tends to stick.

    And i argue that I'm not *that* fat anyway.

    And i shall keep at it and be a super Me!!
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 17,959 Member
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    I think a major factor may be jealousy.

    I have awesome friends and family, a superb partner, I'm a busy social butterfly! He is 40, lives with his dad and watches tv in bed all day.
    Mostly I've kept speaking to him because i feel sorry for him and I've offered advice when asked but it's excuses excuses...

    And there have been many horrible personal comments such as that one just recently. I've known this person online for 10 years but true colours seem to be showing...

    I may be fat but i can and will do something about it! That kinda ugly tends to stick.

    And i argue that I'm not *that* fat anyway.

    And i shall keep at it and be a super Me!!

    This guy sounds exactly like someone I used to consider one of my best friends. You don't need the deadweight, he's bitter coz his life sucks.
  • MelodyandBarbells
    MelodyandBarbells Posts: 7,725 Member
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    Sounds like he's a waste of time ;)
  • bigd66218
    bigd66218 Posts: 376 Member
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    There will always be people that will be jealous of how far you have gone in you weight loss journey. Remain positive continue to diet and exercise...You will reach :) your goals
  • oh_happy_day
    oh_happy_day Posts: 1,138 Member
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    ...and money you going to the gym. You're still fat."
    "But I've lost well over a stone, its quite a lot."
    "You're still fat"

    Helpful comment from a so called friend yesterday afternoon.

    It almost made me cry. To be fair, yes, i am still 5lb off a BMI of 25. And a fair way more off getting somewhere nearer the middle. But 25.9 is hardly horrific. And totally better than 29.2 which is where i started at.
    My lung capacity it awesome for my age alone, never mind that i smoke. Blood pressure is lower. Sleeping better. As well as many many other benefits to doing exercise.

    But that doesn't matter since I'm still fat.

    Think it's time to re evaluate my friends rather than my activities...

    And i did go to the gym yesterday. Twice.

    Definitely. I have a suggestion on how to lose the equivalent weight of a bitter 40 year old man. There's no excuse for speaking to people like that. My experience is that people who are deliberately mean and then go "but it's the truth" probably wouldn't like some truth served back to them.
  • ohmscheeks
    ohmscheeks Posts: 840 Member
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    You do you and don't let others stand in your way.

    Word - Drop that "friend".
  • Soopatt
    Soopatt Posts: 563 Member
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    Society has such a twisted idea about what a normal rate of weight loss is, that I find if I ever make the mistake of bringing up my weight loss (I seldom do), I get inundated with well-meaning advice because people assume I am unmotivated or doing it wrong because I only lose 0.5kg a week. All their crazy diet plans promise them that they can lose the 10kg I have left to lose in 2 weeks instead of 20 weeks, so they assume I am lazy or a cheat and some even feel the need to give me a pep talk or point out to me what I am doing wrong. "It is because you are eating carbs!", "It is because you are eating sugar!" "It is because.... " It is really irritating.

    I am very proud of my 8kg weight loss achieved so far (in 4 months) but I have stopped talking about it. My slow progress is imperceptible to anyone who sees me a couple of times a week, but I recognise that I must not have the need to expect praise from anyone except myself during this process.

    The best revenge on the annoying and the stupid will be achieved when you get to your goal and are just quietly slim and happy in front of them. They will eat their words at that point and I personally, can wait for it.
  • bunnywestley81
    bunnywestley81 Posts: 178 Member
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    @Soopatt those people sound like the "you're not losing because you're eating FOOD!" brigade heehee! Well done on your loss so far xx

    @oh_happy_day i was tempted to reply that he was fat AND lazy AND ugly but I decided to have more pride.

    Deleted and blocked now! :smiley:
  • Alatariel75
    Alatariel75 Posts: 17,959 Member
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    Good for you!!!
  • LiveLoveLift48
    LiveLoveLift48 Posts: 379 Member
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    Think it's time to re evaluate my friends rather than my activities...

    YES this exactly!!! Fat or skinny that is not the kind of " friend" that anyone needs. That is just a hateful thing to say to someone you are supposed to be friends with. I would lose them.

    Keep taking care of yourself...doing what your doing...it will get easier and you are def making changes even if you cant see them on the outside so much. Just please dont let the negativity of others bring you down or make you stop being a better you. Good luck!
  • grace173
    grace173 Posts: 180 Member
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