Trying to stop unhealthy ED mindset- please help.
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holly745
Posts: 13 Member
Hi everyone! To get straight to the point, I've struggled severely in the past with tendencies of an eating disorder (I say tendencies because not only was it undiagnosed, but there were characteristics of various disorders and I'm not quite sure what was wrong with me, but my main problem was binging) I've been using myfitnesspal every day for a while now because I have a habit of feeling extreme guilt after I eat (what feels like) a lot, and counting calories has helped me so much to see that I can eat many more calories and not feel guilty or that I will gain weight. I thought I had regained control of my mindset and had a healthy relationship with food now. But after being sick for a few days, I lost my appetite and ate very little this week. My problem is, I now feel guilty when I eat a normal amount, which I HATE because I had finally felt okay eating a healthy amount of calories. I was wondering if anyone recovering had any tips for stopping the guilty feeling after they eat. Thank you all and I hope this post helps others struggling to get healthy.
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Replies
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PS just wanted to make it clear that I'm not condoning eating disorder tendencies in ANY WAY, they are unhealthy and make you very unhappy. I wish to STOP these negative feelings and get healthy.0
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Professional help!0
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yopeeps025 wrote: »Professional help!
Yep0 -
While it seems like a cop out, this really is the best answer. As you have identified, eating disorders are mental, and it takes a lot of effort to sort through the problems and the feelings. Some people can do it on their own, but I'd say they are probably in the minority.yopeeps025 wrote: »Professional help!
I'd look to find a therapist who specializes in eating disorders and who works with a registered dietitian.0 -
I think about 60% or more of people with an eating disorder actually don't meet criteria for Anorexia or Bulimia, so they are instead diagnosed with "Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified" In other words, you aren't alone. Congrats on your progress so far
Even just being aware of the mindset gives you some power over it, but I would suggest some therapy so really shore you up and get a good grip on things. It could really make the difference between putting this behind you and struggling in various ways for perhaps years more. 0 -
yopeeps025 wrote: »Professional help!
While it seems like a cop out, this really is the best answer. As you have identified, eating disorders are mental, and it takes a lot of effort to sort through the problems and the feelings. Some people can do it on their own, but I'd say they are probably in the minority.yopeeps025 wrote: »Professional help!
I'd look to find a therapist who specializes in eating disorders and who works with a registered dietitian.ncboiler89 wrote: »yopeeps025 wrote: »Professional help!
Yep
all this.0 -
As a professional in the business of fitness and health, I would refer you to another professional who deals with ED to assess you better.
A.C.E. Certified Personal and Group Fitness Trainer
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Been in fitness for 30 years and have studied kinesiology and nutrition
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While it seems like a cop out, this really is the best answer.yopeeps025 wrote: »Professional help!
I can't imagine it seems like a cop out. It's not the best answer. It's the only answer. OP has a psychological disorder and asking random internet weirdos for advice is the worst possible solution.0 -
It may be best to reach out to a professional on this one.
I've been where you are and while I have found using MFP to manage guilt/ binging helpful, it can tend to also exacerbate other related issues. MFP alone won't allow you to deal with all the layers of an ED- gotta treat the cause, not just the symptoms!
EDs are seriously complex issues and many people do go undiagnosed/ untreated because they don't fit a specific definition or don't reach the point that their ED requires hospitalization- doesn't mean they don't need treatment.
Don't worry, it's not as scary as it sounds- look for a therapist with experience in ED issues or possibly a support group. A group like NAMI can help you find great local resources.
Good luck!0 -
ncboiler89 wrote: »
While it seems like a cop out, this really is the best answer.yopeeps025 wrote: »Professional help!
I can't imagine it seems like a cop out. It's not the best answer. It's the only answer. OP has a psychological disorder and asking random internet weirdos for advice is the worst possible solution.
I guess I should have said, it may not be what the OP wants to hear. ED typically are due to someone wanting to be in control; they typically don't like to hear that they need to go discuss their problem with someone else. They feel like it's something they should be able to do on their own.0 -
In case you don't like the idea of speaking to someone in person, there is a new form of therapy (of sorts) that takes place via texting/email. For some people, this may work out better as you get time to really formulate your thoughts into an email and don't feel the pressure to "fill the time" in a face to face session. I'm not sure how you can find a provider though. I was just reading about it in Shape/Self/Women's health (can't remember which one). The article reported that often times, the cost (which is weekly I think) is cheaper than a copay (as they don't take insurance yet) and that on average people exchange interactions with their therapist 30 times a month.
But I do agree, seeking some sort of professional help here might be beneficial, So that you learn some coping strategies for the future.0 -
I Wonder if you researched foods that are good for you - Fruits, Lean Protein, Almonds, Avacados etc. and you had in your MIND what each food consisted of and the health benefits, if that would help your mind set...
ie. Avacados may be high calories yet they are packed with disease fighting anti oxidants as well as fibre and oleic acid (fat that activates your brain and makes you feel full & also helps reduce cholesterol,
folate- high folate intake is associated with lower risk of heart attacks and heart disease etc...
Then you may begin to train your brain into understand that the foods you are intaking are indeed necessary for your health and would lessen the guilt ...
I hope this helps you !
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ncboiler89 wrote: »
While it seems like a cop out, this really is the best answer.yopeeps025 wrote: »Professional help!
I can't imagine it seems like a cop out. It's not the best answer. It's the only answer. OP has a psychological disorder and asking random internet weirdos for advice is the worst possible solution.
I guess I should have said, it may not be what the OP wants to hear. ED typically are due to someone wanting to be in control; they typically don't like to hear that they need to go discuss their problem with someone else. They feel like it's something they should be able to do on their own.
You don't feel that way with your own issues. Don't we all feel we are able to do it ourselves until we can't?
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I really appreciate all the support and kind answers. I thought the idea of therapy over text was awesome.. another thing I wanna point out is that it is kinda hard to accept that you need professional help when you aren't really diagnosed with an ED- irrationally you feel almost like you're not bad enought to go if that makes sense.. I will look into some form of help though. I appreciate all the helpful answers! 0
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I thought the idea of therapy over text was awesome.. another thing I wanna point out is that it is kinda hard to accept that you need professional help when you aren't really diagnosed with an ED- irrationally you feel almost like you're not bad enought to go if that makes sense..
But you aren't diagnosed until you get to a professional, so if you don't want to go to a professional when you haven't been diagnosed, where does that leave you?
I get it though. I suffered with disordered eating when I was a teenager. Still have unhealthy thoughts once and a while, but now I recognize them and deal with them as they come up. I was never diagnosed. I figured that because I wasn't skin and bones like you saw on TV, I didn't have a "real" eating disorder like other people, I just had a particular way of doing things. My university years would have gone a lot easier for me if I just talked to someone. I doesn't have to be a full blown disorder clinic, just someone to help you through.
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Hi everyone! To get straight to the point, I've struggled severely in the past with tendencies of an eating disorder (I say tendencies because not only was it undiagnosed, but there were characteristics of various disorders and I'm not quite sure what was wrong with me, but my main problem was binging) I've been using myfitnesspal every day for a while now because I have a habit of feeling extreme guilt after I eat (what feels like) a lot, and counting calories has helped me so much to see that I can eat many more calories and not feel guilty or that I will gain weight. I thought I had regained control of my mindset and had a healthy relationship with food now. But after being sick for a few days, I lost my appetite and ate very little this week. My problem is, I now feel guilty when I eat a normal amount, which I HATE because I had finally felt okay eating a healthy amount of calories. I was wondering if anyone recovering had any tips for stopping the guilty feeling after they eat. Thank you all and I hope this post helps others struggling to get healthy.PS just wanted to make it clear that I'm not condoning eating disorder tendencies in ANY WAY, they are unhealthy and make you very unhappy. I wish to STOP these negative feelings and get healthy.
Holly,
You are not alone, but you do need to get professional help because it sounds like you have very disordered thoughts around food. Get to your doctor and ask for a referral to a program dealing with eating disorders.0 -
dietstokes wrote: »In case you don't like the idea of speaking to someone in person, there is a new form of therapy (of sorts) that takes place via texting/email. For some people, this may work out better as you get time to really formulate your thoughts into an email and don't feel the pressure to "fill the time" in a face to face session. I'm not sure how you can find a provider though. I was just reading about it in Shape/Self/Women's health (can't remember which one). The article reported that often times, the cost (which is weekly I think) is cheaper than a copay (as they don't take insurance yet) and that on average people exchange interactions with their therapist 30 times a month.
But I do agree, seeking some sort of professional help here might be beneficial, So that you learn some coping strategies for the future.
Nope. The internet and email are NOT the places to deal with eating disorders because it keeps you isolated, and that is part of eating disordered behavior. I know, I had an eating disorder when I was in my teens and early twenties.
Shape magazine is not a good source for making decisions about eating disorders because they are biased toward the skinny population and will say whatever it takes to sell magazines.0 -
I have yet to talk to one girl who recovered from an ED who didn't have to just fight her way through it. It's every bit as hard to eat enough - and may be more hard - as it is to diet. Not one of them was happy and felt at peace with eating normal amounts of healthy food - and they had to eat even more than that.
All of them said it's easier when the food isn't heavy, like meat. Crunch Berries, donuts - stuff that doesn't weigh them down is easier than, say, Thanksgiving kind of food. But that's for gaining.
It takes all of them a loooong time before they feel right about it again. So, it's normal if you have an ED to not want to eat. Kind of a Duh, right?!
Get to a doctor and get referrals to a dietitian and a therapist who specializes in EDs. You might think it seems like overkill, but the quickest way to recovery is with a care team. It's your best shot at feeling normal - and happy - again. So, just do it. If there's a little voice inside you questioning whether it's a good idea or not, tell that little voice to shut the heck up. Then do the smart thing: Doctor, therapist, dietitian.
People recover every day. They learn to eat and go on with their lives. You can, too! 0 -
I really appreciate all the support and kind answers. I thought the idea of therapy over text was awesome.. another thing I wanna point out is that it is kinda hard to accept that you need professional help when you aren't really diagnosed with an ED- irrationally you feel almost like you're not bad enought to go if that makes sense.. I will look into some form of help though. I appreciate all the helpful answers!
People don't need to be diagnose to know when something is wrong with themselves. That is what the deniers say.
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