It's hard to give myself a break/eat more

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Hi all.

Long time lurker, but first time posting. I've been using a combination of MFP and exercise for a couple of years now, with breaks on and off. At the start of this year, I decided to set a goal to reach my GW before my holiday to Spain in June. I achieved this, but now my weight is continuing to decrease...

My stats are:
Age: 25 (female)
Height: 179 cm
SW: 157 lb
GW: 140 lb
CW: 133.5 lb

Following my holiday, I came back from it surprisingly at the same weight (I thought my weight would go up by 5 lb!). I have gained a lot of self control with food now, and know when to stop eating, so I didn't over indulge whilst there.

What I would love advice on is how to allow myself to eat more food/treats. My calorie goal is now 1800; I was on approx. 1650 for losing 0.5 lb a week. Since the holiday especially, I'm often not achieving this calorie goal and I've been losing weight fast the last month or so, hence why I'm nearing 7 lb under my GW.

My boyfriend is a bit worried about this and doesn't want me to "become anorexic". That isn't going to happen; I love food but the main reason for this faster loss just seems to be that I physically can't eat very much anymore! I snack during the day on fruit etc, but for my main meals, I now eat very slowly (it can take up to an hour) and I can get full on a 400-500 kcal dinner.

I don't think I need to lose more weight. Really, I want to be able to achieve "body re-composition", but am not sure how best to go about this. I am continuing to exercise (usually in the gym 4 x a week) and walk a lot. However, I often have to travel with work (e.g. this week) and I can end up under or over eating depending on the situation. This gets me out of sync with logging and once I'm back home I end up limiting my calories more to make up for any potential over eating :(

I assume the general advice will be for me to eat more calorie dense foods, but that thought scares me. I feel like I'm being pulled in 2 directions. On the one hand, I'd love to eat more (I love to bake - but have not been doing this to avoid eating it), but I also sort of want to continue to lose weight and push myself - I am just terrified that I won't be able to maintain and will end up gaining.

Sorry for the lengthy post - I just don't know what to do now that my GW is achieved. Any advice?

Emma :)

Replies

  • rsclause
    rsclause Posts: 3,103 Member
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    Add some healthy fat like tree nuts and avocado. The nuts are also convenient for snacking. I really like to put guacamole on a low carb wrap too.
  • scrittrice
    scrittrice Posts: 345 Member
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    I know it's not what you want to hear, but you do sound as though you are developing disordered eating. No, you probably won't become anorexic overnight, but things like partially wanting to continue losing weight, being "scared" by the thought of eating calorie dense foods, and not doing something you love (baking) because you're afraid of losing control are red flags.

    If you want to recomp, pick a progressive strength training program (you don't mention what kind of exercise you're doing, so I'm assuming it's not weightlifting) and get started. I can't speak for everyone, but lifting weights--especially at the very beginning--made me REALLY HUNGRY. Like really hungry. It sounds like that would be helpful for you. I also think lifting weights changes your view of food--in order to make progress, you need to eat more and well to fuel yourself. In most cultures, women have been conditioned to want to take up as little space as possible. Wanting to get strong instead of small has been a very positive mental shift for me and for a lot of other women on this website.

    And if it's any comfort, I've slowly put on a few pounds in the last few months. You know what? I went back to logging and weighing, and it's coming off again. You've done it once and you can do it again if you have to--gaining 5 pounds isn't cause for panic.
  • maxit
    maxit Posts: 880 Member
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    Add a handful of nuts (28 g) twice a day (your hair and skin will thank you) for a quick and nutritious way to get more needed fuel. Try to hit your protein macro every day. These two changes will begin to move you in the right direction.
  • CrystalFlury
    CrystalFlury Posts: 400 Member
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    Yup, what scrittrice said. If I were you I would consider some weightlifting. I'm actually just starting weightlifting myself because I noticed after maybe a year of having gained about 8-10 lbs. back that it was just my body going, HEY you! EAT! I have been on a deficit long enough! I think throwing in some higher cal (healthy) foods would be beneficial for you. Maybe allow yourself larger servings of protein too.

    I can totally understand your concern for gaining more weight, but I can assure you if you're doing the right amount of activity and eating well you won't suddenly balloon up. Now, if you're like me and bake cookies and have a horrible habit of eating the dough and then eating a good 6-8 cookies then yes, of course you'll gain weight! Allow yourself the treats--in moderation.

    Feel free to add me if you'd like! I think we're kind of in the same boat. I've been in a limbo-maintenance-esque mode for probably a little over a year and I'm trying to get acclimated to weightlifting after being an avid aerobics girl. I am really looking to re-comp now that I realize losing weight isn't changing my overall look.
  • dubird
    dubird Posts: 1,849 Member
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    As long as you monitor your weight and it doesn't go over whatever goal you've set, you don't need to worry about it. However, just me saying that doesn't actually help much, you have to convince yourself of that. If you're continuously afraid of eating food for fear of gaining weight, it might be beneficial to talk to your doctor about it or find a counselor. If you're on the verge of developing an eating disorder (not saying you are, it's just a possibility), best to get it taken care of NOW before it ends up being severely detrimental to your health.

    For food ideas, nuts are very good for adding calories. I can't eat cashews anymore because a small serving doesn't satisfy me emotionally, but the amount I like eating totally kills my calorie count for the day! XD So that's a good, healthy and calorie dense snack that's easy and portable for you. And it's ok if you want to drink a can of soda or have a cookie at the end of the day if you're short on calories. I understand not wanting to keep things in the house, but you can go buy a single (well, mostly single) serve bag of something or a can of soda for a treat at your local gas station. That's what I end up doing on the occasions that I'm short a significant amount of calories.

    As for things like baking, why not do it on occasion? Especially if you can make a cake or batch of cookies to share with people. I don't bake for just myself and HSpoon, but I'll bake something for a gathering of friends, or take extra up to work. That shares the calories around so I don't end up having half a cake staring at me and saying "eeaaatt mmeee".
  • lorrpb
    lorrpb Posts: 11,464 Member
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    Congrats on your discipline in meeting your goal and maintaining!! It looks like you're only talking about 150-200 calories per day (1650 vs 1800), which is 1-2 servings of nuts spread throughout the day. You can use the same planning and discipline that has served you well in the past to accomplish this new goal.
  • AsISmile
    AsISmile Posts: 1,004 Member
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    Hi Emma, we're remarkably similar in stats. You're only one cm taller than I am, and two years older. Currently I am at my GW of 145 lbs, but I've been underweight, lower than what you're at now.
    For me personally having that weight was absolutely horrible. My ribs were beginning to show (but no flat belly, weird genetics).
    I also sort of want to continue to lose weight and push myself

    This really concerns me. Especially since we are so similar in stats. I can imagine the thought of gaining weight is really difficult and confusing in a world so focused on losing weight. When I first started losing weight I was totally okay with it, because we are taught that it is a good thing. Well sliding into the underweight zone was horrible. Coming out of it was even worse.
    It is okay to not be happy with your body, but at some point losing weight is no longer the way to go.

    I would advise to challenge and push yourself in a different way. Weight training would be the perfect way of doing that. If you haven't checked out the body recomposition thread yet you definitely should.

    Also, don't stress about overeating when you are away. As long as you just eat normally when you are at home. You are letting it get to much to your head. Wanting to maintain and working out 4 times a week requires fuel to keep your body going. You are not fueling your body well.

    A final comment, it could definetly be that your maintenance calories of 1800 are at the low end of your maintenance spectrum.
    (Please tell me you eat your exercise calories back.)
    I currently work out 3x a week, and am currently maintaining my weight at a TDEE of 2200 calories daily. What I am trying to say is, maintenance offers wiggle room. If you can maintain at 1800, great. But then don't worry if you eat 1900 or 2000 because that could still be totally in your maintenance range.

    Feel free to add me if you want.
  • AsISmile
    AsISmile Posts: 1,004 Member
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    Just came across this and thought it might be appropriate.
    mich19025 wrote: »
    Did you see how long the gain stayed there for? If your body is used to eating at a lower amount then it is going to suppress a bit. Eating more food is going to equal more water weight and glycogen. For example. I have been on 1400 cals for a longggg time. Had stopped losing weight. Gradually added 100 cals on per week and i'm now at 1700. Did i gain 'scale' weight? I sure did but after a couple of weeks it has went back down. I think this is what causes folk to stay on the diet train too long. They think they are gaining all this fat when they try and move to maintenance. Ask yourself if you are eating 3500 calories over your maintenance level as that's what it would take to gain a pound of fat.

  • cwolfman13
    cwolfman13 Posts: 41,868 Member
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    if you want to "push yourself" set some fitness goals and let go of weight and the scale being the be all and end all. Health and fitness are where it's at...there are *kitten* tons of skinny folk out there who aren't healthy at all. Being underweight is not healthy...fit and healthy people eat.

    I don't diet and exercise, I eat and train.
  • triciab79
    triciab79 Posts: 1,713 Member
    Options
    Being afraid of gaining it back is natural. If you were not a little afraid you would almost certainly gain it back. Too many people reach their goal just to say "Yay" and then eat the fridge for the next month and have every pound back +5.
    You are not going to eat many more calories so I would say store them and eat them for special occasions. I live on my basic diet calories most days so that when a real treat comes along I can have it. If you live on the diet calories and save that 200 a day when the weekend rolls around you can have a few drinks or dessert and not worry that you will have to work harder the next week. This will help you stay disciplined but still live and teach you calorie budgeting.
  • lynnmolter9
    lynnmolter9 Posts: 1 Member
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    maxit wrote: »
    Add a handful of nuts (28 g) twice a day (your hair and skin will thank you) for a quick and nutritious way to get more needed fuel. Try to hit your protein macro every day. These two changes will begin to move you in the right direction.

  • mccindy72
    mccindy72 Posts: 7,001 Member
    Options
    Hi all.

    Long time lurker, but first time posting. I've been using a combination of MFP and exercise for a couple of years now, with breaks on and off. At the start of this year, I decided to set a goal to reach my GW before my holiday to Spain in June. I achieved this, but now my weight is continuing to decrease...

    My stats are:
    Age: 25 (female)
    Height: 179 cm
    SW: 157 lb
    GW: 140 lb
    CW: 133.5 lb

    Following my holiday, I came back from it surprisingly at the same weight (I thought my weight would go up by 5 lb!). I have gained a lot of self control with food now, and know when to stop eating, so I didn't over indulge whilst there.

    What I would love advice on is how to allow myself to eat more food/treats. My calorie goal is now 1800; I was on approx. 1650 for losing 0.5 lb a week. Since the holiday especially, I'm often not achieving this calorie goal and I've been losing weight fast the last month or so, hence why I'm nearing 7 lb under my GW.

    My boyfriend is a bit worried about this and doesn't want me to "become anorexic". That isn't going to happen; I love food but the main reason for this faster loss just seems to be that I physically can't eat very much anymore! I snack during the day on fruit etc, but for my main meals, I now eat very slowly (it can take up to an hour) and I can get full on a 400-500 kcal dinner.

    I don't think I need to lose more weight. Really, I want to be able to achieve "body re-composition", but am not sure how best to go about this. I am continuing to exercise (usually in the gym 4 x a week) and walk a lot. However, I often have to travel with work (e.g. this week) and I can end up under or over eating depending on the situation. This gets me out of sync with logging and once I'm back home I end up limiting my calories more to make up for any potential over eating :(

    I assume the general advice will be for me to eat more calorie dense foods, but that thought scares me. I feel like I'm being pulled in 2 directions. On the one hand, I'd love to eat more (I love to bake - but have not been doing this to avoid eating it), but I also sort of want to continue to lose weight and push myself - I am just terrified that I won't be able to maintain and will end up gaining.

    Sorry for the lengthy post - I just don't know what to do now that my GW is achieved. Any advice?

    Emma :)

    But it's not, you've gone below it, and you're talking about going lower, and being terrified of trying to maintain and gaining weight. That's disordered thinking. You're on the wrong track, here.

    Don't go off of the lists of advice here, go see someone professional, please.