Okay, you haven't logged in in X days, soooooo.....

wewon
wewon Posts: 838 Member
edited September 28 in Health and Weight Loss
If someone one your friends list is clearly not logging in or responding to any e-mails, how long is customary before unfriending them?

I don't want to feel like I jerk, but if you're not even here what's the point?

Replies

  • Xaspar
    Xaspar Posts: 726 Member
    I don't know about protocol for unfriending someone who isn't here. I generally try to send out a messge when I see someone hasn't been here to make sure everything is OK.. To let them know that someone cares and is concerned for them and their success on the journey.
  • lindalee0315
    lindalee0315 Posts: 527 Member
    I guess it doesn't hurt to keep them as a "friend" so that if they come back, they still have some support. I don't think I would "unfriend" someone.
  • EricaSno28
    EricaSno28 Posts: 20
    I just de-friended someone that hadnt logged on in about 30 days ....
  • melissa0001
    melissa0001 Posts: 313 Member
    unless they say they are on vacation, etc... i usually wait a week or 10 days only. I am here everyday and need people that are here everyday.
  • Tristis
    Tristis Posts: 288 Member
    I know what you mean. I usually only friend ppl who are actively seeking friends for motivation. Then, they drop off the face of MFP. :grumble:
  • ZebraHead
    ZebraHead Posts: 15,207 Member
    May hap they are on vacation, a business trip, lost internet/computer for an extended period of time.

    I go thirty days and then I think about it for a few more days. If we are 'tight' then I might let them hang longer. But that's about my limit is thirty days.

    Not a jerk, just need to cut the boat anchors and move on...
  • McKayMachina
    McKayMachina Posts: 2,670 Member
    unless they say they are on vacation, etc... i usually wait a week or 10 days only. I am here everyday and need people that are here everyday.

    Same. :)
  • chrisyoung0422
    chrisyoung0422 Posts: 426 Member
    I have yet to "unfriend" someone because they do not log in. Maybe due time I also do a little house cleaning. :wink:
  • daryls
    daryls Posts: 260
    Great question! I give them about 2 months and then delete! This is even for people I know personally, such as co-workers.
  • MamaLeague
    MamaLeague Posts: 148 Member
    I wish that logging your food through your phone counted...sometimes, it's not possible to get to an actual computer!
  • LeeKetty1176
    LeeKetty1176 Posts: 881 Member
    20 days.............. then i will try to contact them a bit..... more so if we been good MFP buddies

    But sometimes you have to cut loose !

    you will know when its right
  • nomorefatbitch
    nomorefatbitch Posts: 279
    Of course, unless you have their personal email information, sending a message isn't going to work - because they won't SEE the message until they log in again.
  • ChaseAlder
    ChaseAlder Posts: 804 Member
    Give them some time. I wasn't able to log in for like 4 days because of the tornado we just had and MFP posted on my page that I hadn't logged in.
  • wewon
    wewon Posts: 838 Member
    I can understand someone being gone for a week. That sounds like a vacation.

    Maybe a death in the family or some other mishap that simply takes priority; but once you get into the 2, 3, 4 week time frame that is called a no-show.
  • FearAnLoathing
    FearAnLoathing Posts: 4,852 Member
    I have alot of people on my friends list who have not logged in awhile.I was thinking of deleting but did not really see the point.its not like they are cluttering up my news feed or anything.I dont see the harm in keeping them on,maybe when and if they do come back they will see that not everyone gave up on them.
  • wewon
    wewon Posts: 838 Member
    Of course, unless you have their personal email information, sending a message isn't going to work - because they won't SEE the message until they log in again.

    If someone sends me a message or even post on my feed, I get a message via gmail.
  • suzycreamcheese
    suzycreamcheese Posts: 1,766 Member
    it wouldnt occur to me to defriend someone for that reason, and its never really occured to me that my friends on here need me to be active and motivate them all the time :/ I friend people because i like their posts and think id enjoy their updates usually, not because they post me lots of WTGs and GOOD JOBS. As far as im concerned the only person who really motivates me is myself
  • JodiS75
    JodiS75 Posts: 284
    For me it depends on what kind of friend they were. If they never supported me at all, and haven't logged in for 30 days then I delete them simply to keep my list clean. If they were a good friend then I'll keep them for a long time.
  • baumhoff
    baumhoff Posts: 30
    Well, I was off MFP for a few days....maybe less than a week?....and people asked me where I was and gave me support and I think thats why I came back. I wouldn't "unfreind" someone for not being on MFP....I don't think it actually hurts you.
  • Mike523
    Mike523 Posts: 393 Member
    I wish that logging your food through your phone counted...sometimes, it's not possible to get to an actual computer!

    I don't understand this... Logging in through the MFP app on my Android phone absolutely does update my consecutive days count. In fact, for the first 30 days or so that I used MFP, I ONLY used the phone app. I had never even been on the web site, and it counted all those consecutive days, which are still part of my current streak.
  • AngelsKisses75
    AngelsKisses75 Posts: 595 Member
    I have had some gone longer than 30 days and I worry about them, send them messages, maybe post to their wall, but it takes a lot for me to delete someone from MFP. We are a team, and I am not a firm beliver of the chain is only as strong as it's weakest link. The rest of the links just need to step up their game to make up the difference. For me this about support. Support not only for me, but from me. :heart:

    This is one of those to each their own things. If this bothers you then do what you feel is best. :drinker:
  • TheMrsBee
    TheMrsBee Posts: 226 Member
    I wish that logging your food through your phone counted...sometimes, it's not possible to get to an actual computer!

    I log my food and exercise at home mainly in evenings and weekends as i'm so busy i only have time via the app on my iphone, and it counts it.

    Good Luck everyone, maybe try and encourage people, with a message, i am the same as someone else said though, i get an email if someone writes on my wall, responds to a message or status update. Maybe they could be travelling the world or had some serious bad news etc. I don't think i would delete anyone, only if they are rude to me (which i don't think would happen on here as everyone is in the same boat). Like most people on MFP i need support to stay strong and motivated especially after a hectic weekend!
  • Losing2Live69
    Losing2Live69 Posts: 743 Member
    I find this funny because I just went through and deleted several friends. I say 21 days. It takes 21 days to form a habit. Once someone has not logged in for 21 days I assume they have gotten out of the habit of desiring a healthy lifestyle and picked up the habit of not caring. I choose to friend those who have the same goals in mind as I do. That may sound rude...but I can't afford to surround myself with anyone who is not serious about this.
  • Heather75
    Heather75 Posts: 3,386 Member
    I wait until people haven't logged in for 3 months, because you just never know.
  • bigdawg025
    bigdawg025 Posts: 774 Member
    I usually won't un-friend someone unless they haven't logged on in 6 months or more. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt and do my best to realize that life happens in the process.
  • FaerieMoon
    FaerieMoon Posts: 50 Member
    I have alot of people on my friends list who have not logged in awhile.I was thinking of deleting but did not really see the point.its not like they are cluttering up my news feed or anything.I dont see the harm in keeping them on,maybe when and if they do come back they will see that not everyone gave up on them.

    ^^ This.
    I get more bothered when I comment on peoples feed but they don't return the love
    but that is just me
  • LuckyLeprechaun
    LuckyLeprechaun Posts: 6,296 Member
    May hap they are on vacation, a business trip, lost internet/computer for an extended period of time.

    I go thirty days and then I think about it for a few more days. If we are 'tight' then I might let them hang longer. But that's about my limit is thirty days.

    Not a jerk, just need to cut the boat anchors and move on...

    ditto.

    but often I find the people who haven't logged on for 30 days or more, I look at their name and go.....who is that? When did we become friends?
  • LuckyLeprechaun
    LuckyLeprechaun Posts: 6,296 Member
    it's not such an issue now, but when we had a "250 limit" I wasn't willing to use up a spot for someone who has left MFP
This discussion has been closed.

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