Working mom, wife, mid 30s, loves food, hates working out.

Options
mrem3
mrem3 Posts: 12 Member
in Getting Started
MFP isn't new to me. I've been here a time of two. I just can't seem to get to my goal and maintain it for long. I'm 5'1 and just over 150 lbs. That is the biggest I've ever been. I'd like to lose 25 lbs. I seem to do really well for a month or so, but when I hit the 10 lb mark, I reward myself with food. In 2008 I was 128 and felt great. Would love to get back there. I'm a busy mom, wife, person in general. I seem to go go go all day long and never have time or make time to work out. I just can't wake up any earlier and by the end of the day I'm too exhausted. I'm trying my best to eat healthier, make better choices and do some walking when I can. Anyone in the same or similar boat. Looking friends to be accountable with.

Replies

  • SueInAz
    SueInAz Posts: 6,592 Member
    edited August 2015
    Options
    Exercise isn't needed to lose weight; weight loss comes from a calorie deficit. It's up to you whether that deficit comes from eating less or exercising more.

    However... exercise is good for you although I'm sure you're well aware of that. I get how you feel about your life but I'm also a mom, wife, work 9 hour days (plus another hour for the commute) and go to school online. I still manage to find an hour or so nearly every day for exercise. I run every other day and weight lift on the work days I don't run.

    When I finally got the point a few years ago where I realized I was close to my heaviest weight ever I started watching what I ate and after getting a pedometer (and was horrified by how sedentary I had become!) I also starting trying to move a bit more. All I did was walk on my breaks at work and watch TV while riding my stationary bike. That led to trying to run. Dozens of half marathons later I realized that I should be strength training. I now wish that I had just started strength training from the start.

    Here's the thing... with only changes in your diet you can certainly reach your goal weight. The problem is every time you lose weight without strength training (or very, very vigorous cardio which strengthens muscles) you lose muscle along with the fat. The next time you put the weight back on it's all fat. The end result is an escalating body fat percentage which results in a lower metabolism and makes it harder and harder to maintain a healthy weight as time goes on.

    My advice to you would be to start strength training. You don't need to spend hours at the gym, either. While eating to lose weight (less calories than your body burns) you won't gain much muscle, and even that will only be at first, but you'll maintain more of the muscle you already have. You'll look firmer at your goal weight, too.
  • ChelseyMcCaughey
    ChelseyMcCaughey Posts: 6 Member
    edited August 2015
    Options
    You sound a lot like me. I am a busy wife and mom of 3. I work a full time job as well. I start my days at 7 am and usually end up in bed by 10 pm for some relaxation and a little bit of television before I call it quits for the day. My mornings consists of getting myself as well as our 3 children ready for the day/school and then I'm off to work (by 8:30) I get off work anywhere from 4:30-5:30 .. Pick up kids from daycare and go home to start dinner and anything that needs done around the home, laundry.. dishes.. etc. Then there is bath time for the kids, and myself.

    I'm 5'2" and weigh 155lbs. I use to weigh 125 just a few years ago and remember how great that felt. To carry a lighter me around. I strive for those days. I would like to get back down to 130. Any additional goals from there can be established once I get there! But for now 130 would be an ideal goal for me right now! So I am with you all the way!

    Currently I am counting calories. I would like to take up running but hard to find the time. I think a great alternative would be going for walks with the kiddos which I may start doing this week!

    Best of luck with your journey! I would love to keep in touch!

    Chelsey
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    Options
    Two ideas for you. Find some new rewards that are not food based. Would it be some alone-time away from the children, like a bubble bath?
    xYSzi.jpg
    Or are you more social? Perhaps your rewards in that case could be picking up a new hobby or interest that has nothing to do with being a parent. My daughter acquired a show dog. Or you could join a bowling or softball league.

    Which is really my second idea. Instead of working out, just pick something active with or without the children. A roaring game of tag before dinner will help wear everyone out.
  • SueInAz
    SueInAz Posts: 6,592 Member
    edited August 2015
    Options
    jgnatca wrote: »
    Two ideas for you. Find some new rewards that are not food based. Would it be some alone-time away from the children, like a bubble bath?
    My post was already a novel but I did mean to address this, too. Finding non-food rewards is imperative. Not only can food rewards sabotage your plan, but you really need to get into the mode of thinking that food is fuel, never a reward. Your regular diet plan should have some treats built into your calories on a fairly regular basis and then you won't need to use food as a reward or "cheat". Remember, to lose weight you don't need to eat very differently than you normally do, you just need to eat fewer calories. Instead of a giant bowl of ice cream, have a 1/2 cup serving and eat it slowly with a small spoon. You get the idea....

    In addition to things like bubble baths, other good rewards for reaching your mini-goals would be a pedicure or other salon treatment, an article of clothing in your new size, a new pair of shoes or earrings, etc. My rewards these days are things like race entries... sort of sick and twisted, I know, but it motivates me. :smile:

  • ChelseyMcCaughey
    ChelseyMcCaughey Posts: 6 Member
    Options
    Great Ideas! ^^^ :)
  • jgnatca
    jgnatca Posts: 14,464 Member
    Options
    @SueInAz I am so with you, girl, on the race entries thing. I'm lining up my overwinter runs this week.
  • vmsolko
    vmsolko Posts: 51 Member
    Options
    I started out the same. I always thought I hated working out or that I didn't have time. I actually found a website with free videos starting at 5 mins for some of them. NO ONE can say they don't have 5 minutes in a day to exercise. Quite a few of their HIIT videos are only 10 mins. I think 10 mins is extremely doable for anyone.
    Also, look at the other things you make time for. For me, I quit Facebook the same month I started getting healthy. If you add up all the time you spend on your phone or social media (which most people do a lot of) you might find some extra minutes there. Exercising doesn't have to be a half hour every day - find something you like that is effective and just 10 mins can make a world of difference. Part of it is that by working out, you motivate yourself to be conscious of what you're putting in your mouth. Like "Oh, it would take me 45 minutes to work that off, I guess I probably don't want it that badly." I find I hold myself more accountable when I have worked out.

    If you want the link to the website of short exercise videos I use, I would be glad to link it to you.
    Best of luck!
  • Firefly0606
    Firefly0606 Posts: 366 Member
    Options
    I am also a mum with 2 kidlets that works full time and is on too many committees. The common advice seems to be "well, you just have to make time" and I told myself that for years but it just never seemed to happen. I am NOT a morning person, and once I am home and my shoes are off for the day, it's all over.

    I recently quit my gym membership for the 8th time in my life. I hate gyms, but every time I signed up it was with a bucket full of motivation saying "this time will be different!" "I just have to make it happen!" "Now that I'm paying for it, I'll definitely use it!" Did I mention that I hate gyms?

    The key for my has been to find something that 1) I enjoy and has a purpose and 2) I have to book into my diary. It becomes like a meeting, its scheduled in - makes it harder to back out and change. I started karate classes. With karate, I book it into my diary, I don't feel like I'm working out as I am so focussed on improving my technique - brain is engaged, and I can't turn up with the intention of 'riding the exercise bike for 30 minutes' only to get to 20 minutes and hop off saying "that'll do." Sensei kicks my butt if I stop before he says its ok!! And I'm the only woman in the class at the moment - the other boys are starting to become like family. In a karate class, everyone mentors, supports and helps each other.

    Martial arts might not be for you - I'd recommend trying to find something that you can schedule and with some sort of accountability. Group fitness of some sort?
  • _happyoneday
    _happyoneday Posts: 4 Member
    Options
    I'm a 27 year old mom of one. I am 5'4 and currently 176 lbs, trying to lose about 35-40 lbs. I'm like you in regards to doing good for a month (usually it's a week or 2 for me though) and then messing up! Add me if you'd like some support :smile:
  • wearmi1
    wearmi1 Posts: 291 Member
    Options
    I'm not a mom but I have a man in my life I do everything for.... might as well classify him as my child.
  • Zephalia
    Zephalia Posts: 79 Member
    Options
    mrem3 wrote: »
    MFP isn't new to me. I've been here a time of two. I just can't seem to get to my goal and maintain it for long. I'm 5'1 and just over 150 lbs. That is the biggest I've ever been. I'd like to lose 25 lbs. I seem to do really well for a month or so, but when I hit the 10 lb mark, I reward myself with food. In 2008 I was 128 and felt great. Would love to get back there. I'm a busy mom, wife, person in general. I seem to go go go all day long and never have time or make time to work out. I just can't wake up any earlier and by the end of the day I'm too exhausted. I'm trying my best to eat healthier, make better choices and do some walking when I can. Anyone in the same or similar boat. Looking friends to be accountable with.

    Hello there - your situation sounds like me! I too have been here before. I too have lost some but not all the weight I wanted and gained it back by too much rewarding. I'm also a 30 year old, working, mother of two and wife to a Texas-bred man that loves to eat. I definitely cannot get up any earlier - some days I have a hard enough time getting the kids to daycare on time so I can be at work by 8:30am. At the end of the day, after working, making dinner, packing lunches, helping with homework, doing dishes, bathing the kids, taking care of the pets (I breed chameleons and also have 2 Italian Greyhounds), etc...I often just want to hit the bed so I can repeat the next day. Of course, not before snacking on something terrible for me. Now, I have the luxury of 2 weeks to myself out of the month because my ex takes our kids half the time - so I can focus on myself a little more. However, I've found that the best time for me to exercise is at work. I've started walking the 10 floors of stairs at my office on my morning and afternoon break (I'm on the 10th floor so down and back up again) and walking for 30-45 minutes on my lunches either outside, or if the weather is bad, indoors in the walkways downtown.

    It's all a game of motivation because I guarantee once you start forcing yourself to make that little bit of time here and there - you will start to look forward to it and feel better! Then, when you find yourself proud of your accomplishments and slacking off - look to your MFP friends to keep you on track. I'm sending you an add - let's do this!
  • jessiefrancine
    jessiefrancine Posts: 271 Member
    Options
    As a few other posters have mentioned, exercise is great but it isn't necessary to lose weight as long as you are creating a calorie deficit by eating less. That said, exercise can allow you to eat a little more and feel better and stronger as you go. Is there a way to work out during your lunch or breaks during the day? I have a hard time working out in the morning (already get up at 5:30 am to start the day), and by the end of the day my motivation is gone. I find that taking walks during my breaks (adds up to around 2miles a day for me) and working out over my lunch period is the only way for me to consistently exercise. I am super lucky and my employer has an onsite fitness center. Is there something like that available for you, or a gym with fun classes near your workplace you could join? If those are out, bring a pair of athletic shoes with you to work and take a 30 to 45 minute brisk walk. Those minutes of activity add up!
  • mrem3
    mrem3 Posts: 12 Member
    Options
    jessiefrancine wrote: »
    As a few other posters have mentioned, exercise is great but it isn't necessary to lose weight as long as you are creating a calorie deficit by eating less. That said, exercise can allow you to eat a little more and feel better and stronger as you go. Is there a way to work out during your lunch or breaks during the day? I have a hard time working out in the morning (already get up at 5:30 am to start the day), and by the end of the day my motivation is gone. I find that taking walks during my breaks (adds up to around 2miles a day for me) and working out over my lunch period is the only way for me to consistently exercise. I am super lucky and my employer has an onsite fitness center. Is there something like that available for you, or a gym with fun classes near your workplace you could join? If those are out, bring a pair of athletic shoes with you to work and take a 30 to 45 minute brisk walk. Those minutes of activity add up!

    I try to get some in during the day, but it's tough to squeeze in sometimes. I work 7am-5pm with only a 30 min lunch. I Try to get a few minutes of walking in when I can. Trying is better than not doing it though. I know once it becomes routine, I'll look forward to it.
  • mrem3
    mrem3 Posts: 12 Member
    Options
    Thanks all! Lots of helpful hints. I do know I will feel better so I'm really focused on sticking with it.
  • mrem3
    mrem3 Posts: 12 Member
    edited September 2015
    Options
    vmsolko wrote: »
    I started out the same. I always thought I hated working out or that I didn't have time. I actually found a website with free videos starting at 5 mins for some of them. NO ONE can say they don't have 5 minutes in a day to exercise. Quite a few of their HIIT videos are only 10 mins. I think 10 mins is extremely doable for anyone.

    If you want the link to the website of short exercise videos I use, I would be glad to link it to you.
    Best of luck!

    @vmsolko Would you mind sharing the link with me? Thanks!

  • lulu9115
    lulu9115 Posts: 1 Member
    Options
    Hi! Me too. 30s, Mama, not my first time here.I am 220! I have far to go but I would love to join you for your journey and my first third of my journey! My challenge is that exercise makes me feel anxious. I need to get used to my heart pumping again.

    I am about to go do squats and pushups just so I can make a start.
  • vmsolko
    vmsolko Posts: 51 Member
    Options
    Sure!

    It's Hasfit.com

    Everything is free - videos, meal plans, etc.
    I originally found it just googling and finding YouTube videos. But I liked this site the best because there were different exercise plans for different fitness levels. (Definitely what I needed!)

    I started with the 30 Day beginner plans:
    http://hasfit.com/30-day-fitness-challenge-exercise-program-workout-plan-to-get-in-shape/
    Some are longer (longest is 30 mins) but I think that is only once a week. My favorites were Parts 1,2, & 3 to lose belly fat. They are on the calendar for the 30 Day Beginner.

    I added in other videos from the site as I went on. There are some 5 minute weight ones I also liked when I was starting out. The kickboxing one is by far still my favorite. :)

Categories