(Rant) Coworker thinks scales are evil
OneHundredToLose
Posts: 8,523 Member
Ugh. This is so aggravating to me. I have a coworker who I've mentioned my goals to, and she is of the opinion that weighing yourself is terrible, and that scales cause psychological damage / eating disorders. We just got in a minor argument because she said that she doesn't believe in weighing herself, but that she wants to lose a few pounds, and I said that a scale is a tool you use to gather data about the success of your diet / exercise, and that it'll be difficult to tell the difference between herself now and a few pounds lighter without one. She told me that "it's not even worth explaining to me because I wouldn't understand."
BTW, it's worth noting that she is not by any stretch of the imagination overweight. I, on the other hand, have been overweight all of my life. If anyone is going to understand supposed "psychological damage caused by weighing myself", it would be. And yet even I can see that a scale no more causes psychological damage than a spoon makes you fat.
Rant over. Just frustrating.
BTW, it's worth noting that she is not by any stretch of the imagination overweight. I, on the other hand, have been overweight all of my life. If anyone is going to understand supposed "psychological damage caused by weighing myself", it would be. And yet even I can see that a scale no more causes psychological damage than a spoon makes you fat.
Rant over. Just frustrating.
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Replies
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Ppl are ignorant for the most part, especially ones who have never had to be concerned about their weight. Don't let it frustrate you, just roll on!0
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Sounds like she's the one with pyschological damage. Sad.0
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Let's face it - it's nearly impossible for someone to understand unless they've been in your shoes.0
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It's projection. Agree to disagree. As long as she's not yanking your scale out of your hands, it's all good.0
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It reminds me of gun control or guns in general. There are those that are for them and others against. If someone doesn't want a scale they are not required to get one but it is not their place to take yours away.0
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It just strikes me as incredibly crass for her to suggest that I couldn't possibly understand what it's like to be self-conscious about my weight. How can she possibly think that comes across as a rational, intelligent opinion to assert?0
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Did she actually say she wants to lose "a few pounds?" Because if she doesn't believe in scales that's an odd thing to say.
I agree that's she's obviously the one with the psychological issues regarding the scale. It's her issue, obviously, not yours. I am not one to let minor variations in the scale bother me, either, but I also don't believe that the scale is the best measurement of weight loss success. Long story short, if the scale bothers her, she shouldn't use one but it's not her call as to whether it's a good tool for you to use, not everyone has her issues. She also shouldn't be saying she wants to lose "pounds" if she doesn't like that as a method to measure success.0 -
I am a little curious about why she would state she wants to lose a few "pounds". Pounds are a measurement, that a scale is used to measure. WIthout a scale, "pounds" are irrelvant. Size is not directly proportional to weight... Two women who weigh 150 pounds can wear clothing from size 0 to size 22 depending on height, muscle mass etc. Even two people the same height at 150 pounds can wear 4 sizes different if one is more muscular, or one is top heavy etc.
So if she wants to lose a few "pounds" how would she know that? If she starts lifting weights to do it, she may gain 5 pounds muscle and lose 5 pounds fat - so weight stays the size but she goes down a clothing size. I would guess she would then say she succeeded in losing "weight" since her size changed but she would be wrong.
I get she hates scales, but she is contradicting herself by saying she wants to lose a few "pounds". It would have been more consistent to say she wants to lose "inches" or "clothing size". Still have to measure that (tape measure or pair of jeans), but it wouldnt be with a scale.0 -
Did she actually say she wants to lose "a few pounds?" Because if she doesn't believe in scales that's an odd thing to say.I am a little curious about why she would state she wants to lose a few "pounds". Pounds are a measurement, that a scale is used to measure. WIthout a scale, "pounds" are irrelvant.
Yep, her exact words were: "I want to lose a few pounds too," followed by her telling me how bad scales are. When I asked her how she expected to know if she'd successfully lost the few pounds, she said: "I have a mirror."
What. the. *kitten*.
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My mom does not believe in the scale at all, I always ask to weigh her the days that I do but Nop she refuses to do it, she says "oh I don't need a scale, I have my clothes and they talk to me!
I just wish I listened to my clothes talk to me too before
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Ha! She's obviously not someone you really want to continue to discuss your weight loss goals with. You'll only end up frustrated.OneHundredToLose wrote: »Did she actually say she wants to lose "a few pounds?" Because if she doesn't believe in scales that's an odd thing to say.I am a little curious about why she would state she wants to lose a few "pounds". Pounds are a measurement, that a scale is used to measure. WIthout a scale, "pounds" are irrelvant.
Yep, her exact words were: "I want to lose a few pounds too," followed by her telling me how bad scales are. When I asked her how she expected to know if she'd successfully lost the few pounds, she said: "I have a mirror."
What. the. *kitten*.
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Yeah, I guess she just misspoke then. She should have said that she wanted to lean out or lose a dress size. As previously mentioned its hard to know if you've lost a few pounds without using the scales to measure.0
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My mom does not believe in the scale at all, I always ask to weigh her the days that I do but Nop she refuses to do it, she says "oh I don't need a scale, I have my clothes and they talk to me!
I just wish I listened to my clothes talk to me too before
Clothes are such a terrible guide, and the more overweight you are, all the worse of guide is clothing. Some of my plus size clothes could easily accommodate a 30 lb change in weight.
Anyway, I love the whole psychological damage line about the scale. That people freely admit to being so mentally fragile that they can't handle the truth. And infer from that that it's the scale that's bad. I would be humiliated advertising such an unstable mentality to the people around me.
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quite possibly she has come from a background that does involve a eating disorder. i know that u can become addicted to what a scale says( multiple times a day) if that is the case then during treatment she might have been told to use the way her clothes fit as a measurement instead. yes its psychological,yes id steer clear of a discussion about weight with her.everyone needs to use what works for them;)0
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Yeah she probably has or had psychological damage from the scale. Hence her not wanting to use it...which is completely okay and it works for her...however, her trying to project her experience on to you is not okay. A lot of people can use a scale without damaging themselves psychologically. I just would avoid weight loss convos with her, sounds like more stress than it's worth. However, maybe she was genuinely trying to help as she or someone she knew had a bad experience.0
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When I stop weighing weekly is when I start gaining weight. I can say "I'll go by how I feel, or how my clothes fit, or how I look", but when I don't see that # once a week, none of those other things even phase me. Last year, I went from 147 to 167, grew out of various pairs of pants and obviously looked bigger. None of it mattered. I really didn't care. Until I got on the scale and saw the damage. Then I cared. So, for me, scales are knowledge. Knowledge is power. And if I don't know I'm totally blind to it.0
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Might as well get annoyed with every illogical person you meet. It might be healthier to allow that such people exist and as long as they don't interfere with your choices, you can ignore them.
I don't want illogical people deciding for instance, what foods will be served in schools, if vaccines should be banned, and so on. I'll squawk then.
I've noted that with societal trends, some foods are getting harder to find. Like Rice-a-roni, lemon jam and marshmallow cream. Gosh I feel old.0 -
Yeah she probably has or had psychological damage from the scale. Hence her not wanting to use it...which is completely okay and it works for her...however, her trying to project her experience on to you is not okay. A lot of people can use a scale without damaging themselves psychologically. I just would avoid weight loss convos with her, sounds like more stress than it's worth. However, maybe she was genuinely trying to help as she or someone she knew had a bad experience.
This response is perfect.
Some people have had really negative relationships with their scales and perhaps she was trying to (poorly) impart some her struggle with the scale to you. I have a very toxic relationship with my scale and only get on it rarely, despite working to lose weight AND pounds AND have done it successfully. I get your [OP] frustration, but walking a mile in another's shoes is also important.0 -
Yeah she probably has or had psychological damage from the scale. Hence her not wanting to use it...which is completely okay and it works for her...however, her trying to project her experience on to you is not okay. A lot of people can use a scale without damaging themselves psychologically. I just would avoid weight loss convos with her, sounds like more stress than it's worth. However, maybe she was genuinely trying to help as she or someone she knew had a bad experience.
This response is perfect.
Some people have had really negative relationships with their scales and perhaps she was trying to (poorly) impart some her struggle with the scale to you. I have a very toxic relationship with my scale and only get on it rarely, despite working to lose weight AND pounds AND have done it successfully. I get your [OP] frustration, but walking a mile in another's shoes is also important.
It wasn't the fact that she thinks scales are bad that bugged me...it was her "you wouldn't understand" comment. That came off as very asinine to me. How can she assume I wouldn't understand what it's like to view a scale negatively? I've avoided them most of my life.
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BTW, it's worth noting that she is not by any stretch of the imagination overweight. I, on the other hand, have been overweight all of my life. If anyone is going to understand supposed "psychological damage caused by weighing myself", it would be. And yet even I can see that a scale no more causes psychological damage than a spoon makes you fat.
Rant over. Just frustrating.[/quote]
Possibly her mother was frightened by scales when she was carrying your workmate ((; NO ? Maybe not.
Remember she is seeing herself through her self image , not yours. She says she wants to lose a couple of pounds , but without scales that would be hard to accomplish .
She probably sees you and "your scales" as a challenge for her to do something and she doesn't want to bother.
At my previous workplace I used to see the same few people at the scales now and again . We were all pretty lean at the time.
Heavy people or ANTI exercise/workout people seemed to avoid them. One ,scale friendly, lady remarked that ' You know, the wrong people are always using these scales'
Is she also ANTI mirror ? Cause I know from experience, mirrors can show me lots of things I don't like to see.
The only person in the world you can really change is You. Let her worry about her.
Best of luck.
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you actually have no idea if she's ever struggled with her weight.
I weigh myself a few times a year at the Dr office, and have been in maintenance for 5 years, through two pregnancies. I have seen people become obsessed with the number on the scale and lose sight of what is healthy. she could have battled a similar disorder, led to an eating disorder, etc.....you don't know her struggles anymore than you claim she doesn't know yours.
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Yeah, I totally hate anything that gives me data points on which to base my future actions. Besides scales, I also hate my car's fuel gauge, my 401k quarterly statements, and the indicator that tells me which floor my elevator is on.0
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Jennloella wrote: »you actually have no idea if she's ever struggled with her weight.
I weigh myself a few times a year at the Dr office, and have been in maintenance for 5 years, through two pregnancies. I have seen people become obsessed with the number on the scale and lose sight of what is healthy. she could have battled a similar disorder, led to an eating disorder, etc.....you don't know her struggles anymore than you claim she doesn't know yours.
Actually we've discussed it pretty extensively. I know why she claims to have issues with the scale, and that's not what bothers me. What bothers me is the asinine suggestion that everyone is as vulnerable as she is, and her scoff that I "couldn't understand".0 -
I do think depending on the person scales can be detrimental to weight loss. My wife as an example will literally weigh herself every day. Sometimes more than once. She does not understand (or refuses to believe) that weight fluctuates by day. So when she's down one day and then up again the next she freaks out and basically gives up.
I on the other hand prefer once a week and can use it as a gauge for my weight loss without freaking out or losing hope...most of the time.0 -
Lourdesong wrote: »My mom does not believe in the scale at all, I always ask to weigh her the days that I do but Nop she refuses to do it, she says "oh I don't need a scale, I have my clothes and they talk to me!
I just wish I listened to my clothes talk to me too before
Clothes are such a terrible guide, and the more overweight you are, all the worse of guide is clothing. Some of my plus size clothes could easily accommodate a 30 lb change in weight.
This. I lost 75 pounds and my 2x shirts still fit because my chest is large. They are looser for sure,but not as much as you would think.
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My mom does not believe in the scale at all, I always ask to weigh her the days that I do but Nop she refuses to do it, she says "oh I don't need a scale, I have my clothes and they talk to me!
I just wish I listened to my clothes talk to me too before
My clothes are talking to me. They are saying "get on the scales; there's a reason we are so tight." Just a little humor!!0 -
jessiefrancine wrote: »Yeah, I totally hate anything that gives me data points on which to base my future actions. Besides scales, I also hate my car's fuel gauge, my 401k quarterly statements, and the indicator that tells me which floor my elevator is on.
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Offices are the best places to find weird people. The number of strange conversations I've had around here are mind-boggling. Currently we are having the Great Ice Cream Debate of 2015 (whether or not you can pilfer someone's ice cream bar from the freezer if they didn't put their name on it), PoopFest2015 (people complaining about the smell when someone does #2 in the staff washroom, followed by complaining about the smell of the air freshener), just to name two. Office workers are weirdos. You'll be much less annoyed by people's stupidity if you chalk it up to entertainment
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SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »Offices are the best places to find weird people. The number of strange conversations I've had around here are mind-boggling. Currently we are having the Great Ice Cream Debate of 2015 (whether or not you can pilfer someone's ice cream bar from the freezer if they didn't put their name on it), PoopFest2015 (people complaining about the smell when someone does #2 in the staff washroom, followed by complaining about the smell of the air freshener), just to name two. Office workers are weirdos. You'll be much less annoyed by people's stupidity if you chalk it up to entertainment
If it helps the Great Ice Cream Debate of 2015 at all, the consensus here is that if something gets left in the fridge for more than 24 hours without clear labeling, it's fair game
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Ironically, this is exactly how the heated argument got started...OneHundredToLose wrote: »SarcasmIsMyLoveLanguage wrote: »Offices are the best places to find weird people. The number of strange conversations I've had around here are mind-boggling. Currently we are having the Great Ice Cream Debate of 2015 (whether or not you can pilfer someone's ice cream bar from the freezer if they didn't put their name on it), PoopFest2015 (people complaining about the smell when someone does #2 in the staff washroom, followed by complaining about the smell of the air freshener), just to name two. Office workers are weirdos. You'll be much less annoyed by people's stupidity if you chalk it up to entertainment
If it helps the Great Ice Cream Debate of 2015 at all, the consensus here is that if something gets left in the fridge for more than 24 hours without clear labeling, it's fair game
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