sigh
lkm4715
Posts: 7 Member
why d I I get close to my goal & then sabatogge myself?
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Replies
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I'll play your silly game; Why did you get close to your goal and then sabotage yourself?0
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I don't know, but fix it. You sabotaged yourself so you can save yourself too.0
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Today is in the books, tomorrow is another day.0
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It's ok, you just start over like anybody else who has had a slip up and move forward take it a day at a time and try your best you can do whatever you put your mind too
Have a Good day! 0 -
Hey!!! Dont feel bad. I had nothing but junk and stayed nearly within my calories. It was fun but I feel terribly ill. I just got done looking at success stories and am ready for tomorrow to get back on track to feel better too!0
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Yes look at success stories and get remotivated!0
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Why do you think? :]0
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Make the next right choice.
And get counselling to figure out what you are medicating with food?0 -
why do you think we know if you dont?0
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Fear of success?
Being tired of dieting?
Wanting to reward yourself for your hard work?
Because you're human?0 -
We don't know as oyu are the one doing the sabotaging; so you tell us. Then you will be one step closer to fixing it!0
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Yesterday, you said tomorrow. Just do it. Don't let your dreams, be dreams.0
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I do it too................grrrrr................0
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The question shouldn't be why, but HOW you are going to fix it.0
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It's easier to eat bad food and be lazy than it is to prepare healthy food and make time to exercise.
There is something comfortable for you about the extra weight.
It all comes down to a choice, and everyone on here who is successful makes choices too.
Make the right choices for awhile and see how you feel -- if you don't like it you can always go back to making the wrong ones. Good luck.0 -
Fear of success?
Being tired of dieting?
Wanting to reward yourself for your hard work?
Because you're human?
Success can be frightening. In a sense it adds responsibility.
What now???
Can I maintain this success???
How did it change my life???
Etc...Etc...
I think that there is also the aspect of...did we obtain with this success (reaching goal weight) all of the things that we thought it would give us. Yes...we weigh less but are we healthier...more active...change our life style. Did we really learn to eat healthier...learn portion control? Can we walk further...run faster...left heavier?
I think sometimes that success can mask what we failed to do. Sure we look smaller...appears that we have accomplished great things...but did we really change anything? Did we change what caused us to gain the weight in the first place?
There is also that fear...maintaining is more difficult than losing.
OP...learn from what you call "sabotage" and move forward. You really haven't sabotaged yourself unless you give up and stop trying.
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Maybe because you were so close to goal and subconsciously thought - I can finish off any time and I deserve a break.0
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Fear of success?
Being tired of dieting?
Wanting to reward yourself for your hard work?
Because you're human?
Success can be frightening. In a sense it adds responsibility.
What now???
Can I maintain this success???
How did it change my life???
Etc...Etc...
I think that there is also the aspect of...did we obtain with this success (reaching goal weight) all of the things that we thought it would give us. Yes...we weigh less but are we healthier...more active...change our life style. Did we really learn to eat healthier...learn portion control? Can we walk further...run faster...left heavier?
I think sometimes that success can mask what we failed to do. Sure we look smaller...appears that we have accomplished great things...but did we really change anything? Did we change what caused us to gain the weight in the first place?
There is also that fear...maintaining is more difficult than losing.
OP...learn from what you call "sabotage" and move forward. You really haven't sabotaged yourself unless you give up and stop trying.
For me, there's the little voice that says "You're 5 lbs. from goal weight, and you suspect you still won't be happy with yourself even when you're at a 'perfect' weight. If you never reach goal, then you'll never find out that it isn't because you're fat that you hate yourself. You'll still hate yourself at goal weight because being fat isn't what's 'wrong' with you. So eat that cookie, don't reach goal weight, and you can go on lying to yourself that being overweight is the reason you are single/can't get a promotion/aren't happy/daddy never loved you/etc."
But I'm introspective, and I think about that kind of thing. I'm not saying that's the OP or the OP's reason.0 -
Just because you eat too much one day doesn't mean you sabotaged yourself. Just get back to it the next day.0
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For me, there's the little voice that says "You're 5 lbs. from goal weight, and you suspect you still won't be happy with yourself even when you're at a 'perfect' weight. If you never reach goal, then you'll never find out that it isn't because you're fat that you hate yourself. You'll still hate yourself at goal weight because being fat isn't what's 'wrong' with you. So eat that cookie, don't reach goal weight, and you can go on lying to yourself that being overweight is the reason you are single/can't get a promotion/aren't happy/daddy never loved you/etc."
All too true for many of us.0 -
thanks everyone....haven't checked this post until today. HAPPY to report I was back on track the next day & am more determined than ever. I think falling off the 'wagon' was necessary to reframe what I want & where I want to be 6 months & a year from now. I appreciate all the advice & support.0
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A book I'd recommend reading would be "Diets Don't Work". I haven't read it for a while, but I remember it being really good -- delved into a lot psychological, behavior and environmental reasons we sabotage ourselves. Some based on childhood/family patterns we may be repeating that we're not fully aware of, some other deeper fears, etc. Really good stuff and really made me think of various issues about why/how/how often we eat.
Also, Mindless Eating is awesome. It's more about how we can unconsciously eat more than we realize from various cues -- some of which are undoubtedly manipulated by restaurants, fast food and the food industry. Also, some really interesting stuff.0 -
thanks....definitely going to check this out! I have lost 137 lbs.....6 to go... terrified about keeping it off0
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thanks....definitely going to check this out! I have lost 137 lbs.....6 to go... terrified about keeping it off
Wow! 137lbs! That's a whole person!!!!!!! Mega awesome job!
If you were strong enough to lose that much weight, I have no doubt you're strong enough to keep it off. Best of luck to you! 0 -
thanks....definitely going to check this out! I have lost 137 lbs.....6 to go... terrified about keeping it off
I think that's a really common fear, for a lot of reasons. Fear of failure is one, but for me what resonated more was a fear of greater vulnerability and extra attention. When I was larger, I felt safer and stronger -- less of a target and less vulnerable to people. I also got a lot less attention from men and I found the new attention from men to be sometimes flattering and sometimes downright scary. To notice men giving me the full body up and down eye was really unsettling for me. I felt much more like a "target" when I was thinner,so I definitely self-sabotaged to some degree at different times.
I didn't realize any of this until I read the book and it was definitely a light bulb moment for me (among some others). I learned to deal with those fears and poof, no more self-sabotage.
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Congratulations on your loss so far! That is an awesome achievement! I can understand your fears regarding being able to keep it off. Why don't you check out some of the discussions in the Maintaing Weight section? I am not nearly there yet, but when I do get to my goal weight, I know I will have to come up with strategies to keep the weight off.
This is a useful thread
http://community.myfitnesspal.com/en/discussion/1422943/long-time-maintainers-how-do-you-do-it/p1
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Once you figure out all those reasons, you'll be well on your way. I suggest you talk out with a friend, partner, or counselor, and develop some specific strategies.0
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Lindsey, I wanna be your new best friend, love all your supportive comments and suggestions!! As of today, total loss is 141...23 more to go even though my friends say No Way!0
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