Insecure husband

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Nikkinoonars
Nikkinoonars Posts: 1 Member
in Motivation and Support
Hi all... just need some advice.
Over the last 3 years I have lost nearly 22kgs. My husband has been my biggest support...until I joined a gym. He now has in his head that I am going to meet some buff guy and run off into the sunset. He is constantly telling me that I need to cut back on the weights because he doesn't like "buff" women and he thinks women with muscles are unattractive and it will effect our intimacy. I, on the other hand, love the changes I am noticing from the weights. It's only motivating me more. I haven't been this comfortable within my own skin since before our 4 kids were born.
My husband lives an unhealthy lifestyle, drinks red bull, smokes, has irregular eating patterns and weighs about 60kgs. He "says" he wants to change but "can't get motivated". I have done a meal prep for him and he screwed his nose up. Offered to work out with him. But there is always an excuse. Short of telling him to suck it up and get over it, what can I do? Part of me thinks f@#$ him, If I want to get "buff" it's my choice, my body and he has no say, it's his issue. While the other part wants to keep the peace. Yet, It feels as though he is pushing me away.
Has anyone been through this? If so what did you do?
TIA

Replies

  • gogreenley
    gogreenley Posts: 4 Member
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    Reassure him. It sounds like he's worried that you'll move on more than you getting buff. The getting buff thing is an excuse to have you stop going to the gym.
  • 0utrun
    0utrun Posts: 71 Member
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    I understand what you are going through, more than you know. My hubby went through the same exact thing. You just have to keep reassuring him and keep nudging him in the healthy direction. He finally started to get healthy once he realized that I wasn't going to stop. He still struggles with it this day. You can lead a horse to water....
  • RodaRose
    RodaRose Posts: 9,562 Member
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    He will calm down as he gets used to the new you. He wants everything to stay the same. :)
    Leave him alone with the red bull. Do not give him any suggestions about how he can improve, ESP if he asks.
    You have 4 children. Spend your time with him talking about each other and nothing having to do with improvement.

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