Stress
superhockeymom
Posts: 2,000 Member
Working on coping skills and just want to throw it out there. How do you deal with stress??? I was a stress eater. I also used to go for very long runs. Now I am not able to do either. But looking for a new way to relieve the constant pressure. I have tried meditation I just can't turn it off. Yoga. I just suck. Is there anything I'm missing.
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Baths, good books, the company of close friends, stretching, focusing on slow deep breathing... I also give myself ten minutes to focus on my stresses and examine what I'm worried about, then if I can't fix it now I 'put it away' and divert my attention somewhere else. That does take practice though.
Exercise is a big stress reliever for me, especially running, but you've said that's out. Swimming? I find the coolness and quietness of my local pool quite calming sometimes.0 -
Wow there are some bitter Bettys here huh?
For me, whenever I'm stressed I take a walk, now if you can't walk around (you said you can't run, but I wasn't sure why), you can always take your mind off of the stress with crossword puzzles, or some sort of brain activity. Hell even just coloring is enough to temporarily take the stress off.0 -
Maybe it's people like you. Oh no that's not nice. Actually it's a work thing. Sorry not really that much fun for you I'm sure you would rather it be all of the above.0
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Baths, good books, the company of close friends, stretching, focusing on slow deep breathing... I also give myself ten minutes to focus on my stresses and examine what I'm worried about, then if I can't fix it now I 'put it away' and divert my attention somewhere else. That does take practice though.
Exercise is a big stress reliever for me, especially running, but you've said that's out. Swimming? I find the coolness and quietness of my local pool quite calming sometimes.
I both ran and swam in college unfortunately bad shoulder bad knee it's hit or miss. Started running again and it's ok it does work as far as the stress issue but I not sure how long it will last.
I will keep running just looking I guess for new ideas.0 -
Forget it. Not worth it.
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If you have a bad knee and can't run anymore, check out the elliptical. It's no-impact and still gives you the option of cardio to burn off some stress. Make sure that you are eating back your exercise calories, though.0
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I'm in a very stressful situation right now and I'm going to talk to my doctor about anxiety medication. It's just too much for me right now. Running helps but I can't always go for a run. Have you tried journaling? Today I bought an adult coloring book (complicated designs not nekkid people) at Barnes and nobles that has positive quotes on each page and I'm going that might help refocus my mind when my thoughts start looping. I used to do yoga and mindfulness based meditation but it's hard for me to be consistent when I'm already in a funk and haven't been doing it so I hear you on that. Have you tried cycling? It is easier on the knees than running but still might be hit or miss I guess. What about a Zumba or my gym has a hip hop class that can be fun too and just take your mind off things because it's a little silly. Do you have any animals? My friend let my borrow her dog while she was at work and I wasn't so I didn't have to be alone? Animals can be very therapeutic maybe walk dogs or be a kitten petter for the local shelter? Pottery class and use your hands to create something? (Just throwing out ideas for you and also admittedly for myself at this point).0
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Stress relievers: A good workout, is there something you can do besides running, like exercise bike, swim, etc? Sex (tandem or single lol)... Volunteering... Bake goodies for local seniors...0
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Have you tried a guided meditation?0
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blankiefinder wrote: »Stress relievers: A good workout, is there something you can do besides running, like exercise bike, swim, etc? Sex (tandem or single lol)... Volunteering... Bake goodies for local seniors...
Did u really just throw out the sex tandem or single. That's stress relief I can't stop laughing.0 -
superhockeymom wrote: »blankiefinder wrote: »Stress relievers: A good workout, is there something you can do besides running, like exercise bike, swim, etc? Sex (tandem or single lol)... Volunteering... Bake goodies for local seniors...
Did u really just throw out the sex tandem or single. That's stress relief I can't stop laughing.
Haha yes, I missed humour, that one should have been an obvious one
And yes, I did suggest that. Sometimes single is easier, no pay back lmao... 0 -
blankiefinder wrote: »superhockeymom wrote: »blankiefinder wrote: »Stress relievers: A good workout, is there something you can do besides running, like exercise bike, swim, etc? Sex (tandem or single lol)... Volunteering... Bake goodies for local seniors...
Did u really just throw out the sex tandem or single. That's stress relief I can't stop laughing.
Haha yes, I missed humour, that one should have been an obvious one And yes, I did suggest that. Sometimes single is easier, no pay back lmao...
Love it.0 -
I'm in a very stressful situation right now and I'm going to talk to my doctor about anxiety medication. It's just too much for me right now. Running helps but I can't always go for a run. Have you tried journaling? Today I bought an adult coloring book (complicated designs not nekkid people) at Barnes and nobles that has positive quotes on each page and I'm going that might help refocus my mind when my thoughts start looping. I used to do yoga and mindfulness based meditation but it's hard for me to be consistent when I'm already in a funk and haven't been doing it so I hear you on that. Have you tried cycling? It is easier on the knees than running but still might be hit or miss I guess. What about a Zumba or my gym has a hip hop class that can be fun too and just take your mind off things because it's a little silly. Do you have any animals? My friend let my borrow her dog while she was at work and I wasn't so I didn't have to be alone? Animals can be very therapeutic maybe walk dogs or be a kitten petter for the local shelter? Pottery class and use your hands to create something? (Just throwing out ideas for you and also admittedly for myself at this point).
I keep seeing those coloring books, they're so pretty! Saw one the other day for Game of Thrones, haha!
As others have mentioned, I like walking, reading, dancing, bubble bath. Self mani/pedi and/or facial. Even cooking something that will take a really long time has helped me to de-stress. Knitting—even though I'm terrible at it, it's so relaxing. Oh! And scrap-booking, which is really pretty fun. If I'm super stressed out for some reason, I might do a late-night Netflix binge, but I have to be careful with that, or else my sleep schedule will be all messed up, which isn't helpful for stress at all.
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When I'm super stressed or worried about something I cannot do anything about, I will bury myself in a book. At least then my mind is occupied and I get to live in someone else's world for awhile.0
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superhockeymom wrote: »blankiefinder wrote: »superhockeymom wrote: »blankiefinder wrote: »Stress relievers: A good workout, is there something you can do besides running, like exercise bike, swim, etc? Sex (tandem or single lol)... Volunteering... Bake goodies for local seniors...
Did u really just throw out the sex tandem or single. That's stress relief I can't stop laughing.
Haha yes, I missed humour, that one should have been an obvious one And yes, I did suggest that. Sometimes single is easier, no pay back lmao...
Love it.
Sex is a great stress reliever, yes, single or in tandem. Although in tandem is a better stress reliever as intimacy is also a stress reliever.
so are hugs longer than 3 seconds, you know....0 -
I'd recommend a kind of lifestyle change where you put your needs higher on your priority list. Yoga for 10 minutes isn't going to help as much as cultivating a lifestyle where you have people supporting you in the ways you've told them to help you. Having the kids help around the house. The husband helping with shuttling the kids. ... All of those little things will add up. If you add on top of that, the hot baths and laying off the booze, and you could see your life change.0
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Sorry couldn't see anything else. Now THIS is what I'm talking about!blankiefinder wrote: »Stress relievers: A good workout, is there something you can do besides running, like exercise bike, swim, etc? Sex (tandem or single lol)... Volunteering... Bake goodies for local seniors...0 -
superhockeymom wrote: »blankiefinder wrote: »superhockeymom wrote: »blankiefinder wrote: »Stress relievers: A good workout, is there something you can do besides running, like exercise bike, swim, etc? Sex (tandem or single lol)... Volunteering... Bake goodies for local seniors...
Did u really just throw out the sex tandem or single. That's stress relief I can't stop laughing.
Haha yes, I missed humour, that one should have been an obvious one And yes, I did suggest that. Sometimes single is easier, no pay back lmao...
Love it.
Sex is a great stress reliever, yes, single or in tandem. Although in tandem is a better stress reliever as intimacy is also a stress reliever.
so are hugs longer than 3 seconds, you know....
I'm all for sex. Think that is the best idea yet.0 -
superhockeymom wrote: »Working on coping skills and just want to throw it out there. How do you deal with stress??? I was a stress eater. I also used to go for very long runs. Now I am not able to do either. But looking for a new way to relieve the constant pressure. I have tried meditation I just can't turn it off. Yoga. I just suck. Is there anything I'm missing.
Was the food an oral fixation kind of thing? If so, you could just put other things in your mouth for the sensation.
Like gum.0 -
I'd recommend a kind of lifestyle change where you put your needs higher on your priority list. Yoga for 10 minutes isn't going to help as much as cultivating a lifestyle where you have people supporting you in the ways you've told them to help you. Having the kids help around the house. The husband helping with shuttling the kids. ... All of those little things will add up. If you add on top of that, the hot baths and laying off the booze, and you could see your life change.
But it's getting those people to do anything that causes the added stress.
I still vote for sex.0 -
colouring book or sex....hmmm
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superhockeymom wrote: »I'd recommend a kind of lifestyle change where you put your needs higher on your priority list. Yoga for 10 minutes isn't going to help as much as cultivating a lifestyle where you have people supporting you in the ways you've told them to help you. Having the kids help around the house. The husband helping with shuttling the kids. ... All of those little things will add up. If you add on top of that, the hot baths and laying off the booze, and you could see your life change.
But it's getting those people to do anything that causes the added stress.
I still vote for sex.
If it is your relationship with your husband stressing you, marriage counselling or at least therapy for yourself if it is really bad. If it is just small everyday problems, getting out of the house usually helps me. Join a class if you have the option, or at least go for a walk.
If it is the kids, then you need to remind yourself you are not their friend, you are their parent. Do not negotiate. Do not try to please them constantly. Enforce consequences. Even if they are going to be upset and hurt and even miss a sports practice or be late for school or fail at a test because they are so terribly upset with you. Them learning they need to help and that you (or a future partner) is not a maid, it is one of the most valuable lessons.
Reserve time for yourself and make sure to use this time for yourself. Plan something that means leaving the home. It will be easier to stick to the plan. Let your husband know that e.g. 3 times per week you are going to leave for the gym at 7 and not be home until 9. Switch your phone off. Do not be tempted to call and see if they are all dying from starvation, if homework has been done or whatever. Use this time for yourself.
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suziecue20 wrote: »colouring book or sex....hmmm
I know what a would pick.
I'm very bad at coloring.
Walking relieves stress but way to much time in my own head right now.
Hockey works but it is not often enough.
I guess I'll keep working on finding more distractions. Seem to help the most.
Thanks for making me laugh.
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superhockeymom wrote: »suziecue20 wrote: »colouring book or sex....hmmm
I know what a would pick.
I'm very bad at coloring.
Walking relieves stress but way to much time in my own head right now.
Hockey works but it is not often enough.
I guess I'll keep working on finding more distractions. Seem to help the most.
Thanks for making me laugh.
Walk while listening to an audiobook. Same benefits of walking while not being so much in your own head.0 -
superhockeymom wrote: »I'd recommend a kind of lifestyle change where you put your needs higher on your priority list. Yoga for 10 minutes isn't going to help as much as cultivating a lifestyle where you have people supporting you in the ways you've told them to help you. Having the kids help around the house. The husband helping with shuttling the kids. ... All of those little things will add up. If you add on top of that, the hot baths and laying off the booze, and you could see your life change.
But it's getting those people to do anything that causes the added stress
They're only adding extra stress if you let them. Patti, you're in your head with this. You can take control of what you do and do not do. You are in control of what you allow to affect you emotionally. You're like 45, right? Honestly, you sometimes sound like you're in your 20s in terms of your self empowerment. I don't know who taught you that you come last. The truth is that you can help your family more if you take care of yourself first. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Stop being an empty cup. Take the time and space you need to refill your own glass. When you're happy and healthy, then you'll be able to give more to them than you do now.0 -
superhockeymom wrote: »I'd recommend a kind of lifestyle change where you put your needs higher on your priority list. Yoga for 10 minutes isn't going to help as much as cultivating a lifestyle where you have people supporting you in the ways you've told them to help you. Having the kids help around the house. The husband helping with shuttling the kids. ... All of those little things will add up. If you add on top of that, the hot baths and laying off the booze, and you could see your life change.
But it's getting those people to do anything that causes the added stress
They're only adding extra stress if you let them. Patti, you're in your head with this. You can take control of what you do and do not do. You are in control of what you allow to affect you emotionally. You're like 45, right? Honestly, you sometimes sound like you're in your 20s in terms of your self empowerment. I don't know who taught you that you come last. The truth is that you can help your family more if you take care of yourself first. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Stop being an empty cup. Take the time and space you need to refill your own glass. When you're happy and healthy, then you'll be able to give more to them than you do now.
I grew up the peacemaker it's who I am.
I don't think that will ever change.
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superhockeymom wrote: »superhockeymom wrote: »I'd recommend a kind of lifestyle change where you put your needs higher on your priority list. Yoga for 10 minutes isn't going to help as much as cultivating a lifestyle where you have people supporting you in the ways you've told them to help you. Having the kids help around the house. The husband helping with shuttling the kids. ... All of those little things will add up. If you add on top of that, the hot baths and laying off the booze, and you could see your life change.
But it's getting those people to do anything that causes the added stress
They're only adding extra stress if you let them. Patti, you're in your head with this. You can take control of what you do and do not do. You are in control of what you allow to affect you emotionally. You're like 45, right? Honestly, you sometimes sound like you're in your 20s in terms of your self empowerment. I don't know who taught you that you come last. The truth is that you can help your family more if you take care of yourself first. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Stop being an empty cup. Take the time and space you need to refill your own glass. When you're happy and healthy, then you'll be able to give more to them than you do now.
I grew up the peacemaker it's who I am.
I don't think that will ever change.
It certainly will never change if you've decided that it won't.0 -
SingRunTing wrote: »superhockeymom wrote: »suziecue20 wrote: »colouring book or sex....hmmm
I know what a would pick.
I'm very bad at coloring.
Walking relieves stress but way to much time in my own head right now.
Hockey works but it is not often enough.
I guess I'll keep working on finding more distractions. Seem to help the most.
Thanks for making me laugh.
Walk while listening to an audiobook. Same benefits of walking while not being so much in your own head.
I have audiobooks on my phone not sure why I never thought of that. Won't work for my morning walks. Safety issue its still dark. But maybe on the treadmill or elliptical.
Thanks.0 -
janejellyroll wrote: »superhockeymom wrote: »superhockeymom wrote: »I'd recommend a kind of lifestyle change where you put your needs higher on your priority list. Yoga for 10 minutes isn't going to help as much as cultivating a lifestyle where you have people supporting you in the ways you've told them to help you. Having the kids help around the house. The husband helping with shuttling the kids. ... All of those little things will add up. If you add on top of that, the hot baths and laying off the booze, and you could see your life change.
But it's getting those people to do anything that causes the added stress
They're only adding extra stress if you let them. Patti, you're in your head with this. You can take control of what you do and do not do. You are in control of what you allow to affect you emotionally. You're like 45, right? Honestly, you sometimes sound like you're in your 20s in terms of your self empowerment. I don't know who taught you that you come last. The truth is that you can help your family more if you take care of yourself first. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Stop being an empty cup. Take the time and space you need to refill your own glass. When you're happy and healthy, then you'll be able to give more to them than you do now.
I grew up the peacemaker it's who I am.
I don't think that will ever change.
It certainly will never change if you've decided that it won't.
Peacekeeper or conflict avoider? Big difference between these two concepts.
Edit to add: if it wasn't clear, I was asking Patti. Sorry for the weird nesting quote.0 -
janejellyroll wrote: »superhockeymom wrote: »superhockeymom wrote: »I'd recommend a kind of lifestyle change where you put your needs higher on your priority list. Yoga for 10 minutes isn't going to help as much as cultivating a lifestyle where you have people supporting you in the ways you've told them to help you. Having the kids help around the house. The husband helping with shuttling the kids. ... All of those little things will add up. If you add on top of that, the hot baths and laying off the booze, and you could see your life change.
But it's getting those people to do anything that causes the added stress
They're only adding extra stress if you let them. Patti, you're in your head with this. You can take control of what you do and do not do. You are in control of what you allow to affect you emotionally. You're like 45, right? Honestly, you sometimes sound like you're in your 20s in terms of your self empowerment. I don't know who taught you that you come last. The truth is that you can help your family more if you take care of yourself first. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Stop being an empty cup. Take the time and space you need to refill your own glass. When you're happy and healthy, then you'll be able to give more to them than you do now.
I grew up the peacemaker it's who I am.
I don't think that will ever change.
It certainly will never change if you've decided that it won't.
Peacekeeper or conflict avoider? Big difference between these two concepts.
Edit to add: if it wasn't clear, I was asking Patti. Sorry for the weird nesting quote.janejellyroll wrote: »superhockeymom wrote: »superhockeymom wrote: »I'd recommend a kind of lifestyle change where you put your needs higher on your priority list. Yoga for 10 minutes isn't going to help as much as cultivating a lifestyle where you have people supporting you in the ways you've told them to help you. Having the kids help around the house. The husband helping with shuttling the kids. ... All of those little things will add up. If you add on top of that, the hot baths and laying off the booze, and you could see your life change.
But it's getting those people to do anything that causes the added stress
They're only adding extra stress if you let them. Patti, you're in your head with this. You can take control of what you do and do not do. You are in control of what you allow to affect you emotionally. You're like 45, right? Honestly, you sometimes sound like you're in your 20s in terms of your self empowerment. I don't know who taught you that you come last. The truth is that you can help your family more if you take care of yourself first. You cannot pour from an empty cup. Stop being an empty cup. Take the time and space you need to refill your own glass. When you're happy and healthy, then you'll be able to give more to them than you do now.
I grew up the peacemaker it's who I am.
I don't think that will ever change.
It certainly will never change if you've decided that it won't.
Peacekeeper or conflict avoider? Big difference between these two concepts.
Edit to add: if it wasn't clear, I was asking Patti. Sorry for the weird nesting quote.
Growing up conflict was unavoidable. So it's hard to say
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