harmful? negative self-talk keeps me going

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mrb_9110
mrb_9110 Posts: 189 Member
in Health and Weight Loss
When exercising or thinking about what I'm going to eat, negative self-talk keeps me working out harder or longer and keepps me from eating a second helping/extra snack etc. Can this be harmful to me? It's working to make me be stricter with my self in eating and exercise, but I don't want to develop anorexic/bulimic style thinking or issues.
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  • TiffyBear415_xx
    TiffyBear415_xx Posts: 77
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    I do the same thing. :/
  • NightOwl1
    NightOwl1 Posts: 881 Member
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    It depends. Are your habits healthy? Different things work for different people, so the method you motivate yourself with isn't necessarily a good or bad thing by itself. However, if your negative self talk leads to unhealthy habits, then it's not a good thing.

    If you are worried about developing an eating disorder, you might want to find a support group or some counseling about how to develop a healthy relationship with food.
  • jinxywinx
    jinxywinx Posts: 38
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    I do, too. Seems to be the best motivation right now. But, now I'm curious if this will be detrimental to my body image, too.
  • falloner
    falloner Posts: 11
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    Not a doctor, but as long as you are being healthy stick with what is working for you.
  • funkyspunky871
    funkyspunky871 Posts: 1,675 Member
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    I'd say it could be harmful. I have a form of non-purging bulimia (as silly as that sounds, it's true), and even I don't use negative self-talk to workout harder or eat better. If anything... Negative self-talk makes me binge and starve even more.
  • kklindsey
    kklindsey Posts: 382 Member
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    what do you say to yourself? if it is very negative and bad then yes, you will have a problem later. (former bulemic here) if it is negative in a humourous way and you aren't bashing yourself then probably not. can you swap it out for a postive like instead of "you are a big fat cow and if you don't get on that treadmill you will be a fatter cow" try " if you wan to tighten up, fit into those size _ jeans and feel great about yourself getting on that treadmill now is the only option" I don't know what you say in your head so it's hard to guess but being tough on yourself in a positive way is fine, bashing yourself is not.
  • Jenscan
    Jenscan Posts: 694 Member
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    Oh, I'm brutal to myself. I only say to myself what others are thinking - so really, it's not negative; it's the truth. And yes, it's very motivating.
  • Roszepoo
    Roszepoo Posts: 46
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    I have been very active and very up the since I joined. I am dreamng of tomorrow and good things ahead. I speak nicely to myself and I am so motivated to move and I do not even desire junk "food" (use term loosely) at all.
    I would counsel my daughter (your age) away from negative self talk. My opinion, but I bet you can find reseacrh to back it up. As my dear granny used to say "you can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar". Tell yourself GOOD things. "I care about me so I will choose to move and to eat well". Try it. Bet you'll like it!!
  • Becca_007
    Becca_007 Posts: 596 Member
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    I'm working to build UP my self esteem, so being negative to myself wouldn't get that done. I've always beaten myself up emotionally probably more so than anyone else, the last thing that would be healthy for me would be continuing it.

    Building up a healthy self image doesn't seem like it should include negative self talk, even for motivation. Considering the consequences of making bad choices is one thing, beating oneself up and tearing oneself down to workout, eat well etc., well, doesn't sound all that healthy to me.

    Even if it works, what happens later when you are emotionally beat up and mess up? When will positive self talk begin? At goal weight?

    Guess we all have our ways.:flowerforyou:
  • Becca_007
    Becca_007 Posts: 596 Member
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    I have been very active and very up the since I joined. I am dreamng of tomorrow and good things ahead. I speak nicely to myself and I am so motivated to move and I do not even desire junk "food" (use term loosely) at all.
    I would counsel my daughter (your age) away from negative self talk. My opinion, but I bet you can find reseacrh to back it up. As my dear granny used to say "you can catch more flies with honey than you can with vinegar". Tell yourself GOOD things. "I care about me so I will choose to move and to eat well". Try it. Bet you'll like it!!
    Love it!!:heart::drinker:
  • KimbersNewLife
    KimbersNewLife Posts: 645 Member
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    I'd say it could be harmful. I have a form of non-purging bulimia (as silly as that sounds, it's true), and even I don't use negative self-talk to workout harder or eat better. If anything... Negative self-talk makes me binge and starve even more.
    I agree when I am too hard on myself and put myself down too much it actually leads to binge eating so I really can't recommend that just my own personal experience. Good Luck! Try focusing on the positive and see how things change for the better.
  • mrb_9110
    mrb_9110 Posts: 189 Member
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    Without putting you in my mind, it's stuff like "Quit being lazy, you can run your *kitten* a few minutes longer." "Don't you want to look like _______? Then you better not go over your calories. Step away from the refrigerator."
  • CherrySunday
    CherrySunday Posts: 301
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    I sometimes to the drill instructor talk to myself mentally, if that's what you mean. I don't see anything wrong with it, I mean you're just pushing yourself to do more. My motivation are the gym bunnies -- I'll be like, "I would LOVE to wear that outfit six months down the line. Instead of my sweatpants and hoodie."
  • kr3851
    kr3851 Posts: 994 Member
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    I only put myself down in a positive way if that makes any sense. My big one at the moment is 'it's hurting because you're fat. and you're fat because you gave up when it hurt. you can do this' I swear I said this about 50 times in my 30 minute workout this morning... those damn intervals.. they really hurt!!

    PS It's not so much physical hurt - I'm pissed off at myself for letting me get this way.
  • firestarbeauty
    firestarbeauty Posts: 32
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    I have done or notice myself doing this as well, but you realized it could possibly become an issue so before letting it get there I think talking to someone in the proper field and developing better motivational self talks would be a more positive way to keep yourself going.
  • Jenscan
    Jenscan Posts: 694 Member
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    PP mentioned a drill sergeant. I channel R. Lee Ermy. "GET WALKING FATTY!!! YOU ARE THE REASON YOU'RE FAT!!! MOVE MOVE MOVE!!"

    Again, I'm being truthful. I am fat. I am the reason I became fat. And anyone who sees me on the street would be thinking; "God, I'm glad she's trying to do something about that weight. Poor girl". I don't motivate myself with positive thoughts. I have nothing to be positive about, really.
  • kklindsey
    kklindsey Posts: 382 Member
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    Without putting you in my mind, it's stuff like "Quit being lazy, you can run your *kitten* a few minutes longer." "Don't you want to look like _______? Then you better not go over your calories. Step away from the refrigerator."

    I don't see that as a problem, that is more tough love than negative. I say if it works and it is as harmless as that, go for it.
  • kklindsey
    kklindsey Posts: 382 Member
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    PP mentioned a drill sergeant. I channel R. Lee Ermy. "GET WALKING FATTY!!! YOU ARE THE REASON YOU'RE FAT!!! MOVE MOVE MOVE!!"

    Again, I'm being truthful. I am fat. I am the reason I became fat. And anyone who sees me on the street would be thinking; "God, I'm glad she's trying to do something about that weight. Poor girl". I don't motivate myself with positive thoughts. I have nothing to be positive about, really.

    I don't want to put my nose in your business but I think that your negative self-talk is of the harmful variety. If you think you have NOTHING to be positive about and think that everyone that looks at you is thinking how awful you are you have stepped over the line and need to find some things to be positive about or you are not going to find yourself with anything positive about when you get to your goal weight and that is how anorexics are born. Feel free to tell me to mind my own business but as someone who spent many, many years with an eating disorder I can tell you it starts with disordered thinking.
  • Jenscan
    Jenscan Posts: 694 Member
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    No, you're fine - I am very negative towards myself, but really it's the truth. I'm fat. You're right; I actually have been diagnosed with an ED in the past and was in outpatient treatment for it. I'm trying to lose weight more healthfully this time but being very hard on myself is a habit I can't break.

    So, I can only do what I know and that is to be brutally honest with myself. In truth, I am FAR, FAR, harder on myself than others. This is because I have to live with myself 24/7.
  • kklindsey
    kklindsey Posts: 382 Member
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    I have no problem with admitting you are fat to yourself. I know a LOT of people who won't own up to that and admittting it is the first step to doing something about it. The first thing I had to learn to do was actually say out loud to other people how much I weighed. You would be amazed how many women won't say. I would tell them "so you think if you don't tell anyone how much you weigh that they will magically disbelieve their own eyes and think you are skinny?" I was NOT being mean, I just think it is important to be able to say out loud how much you weight. It's like the elephant in the room, everyone sees it but nobody is talking about it. If you have/had an ED than you know that your self-talk is negative and could send you right back that direction. I was bulemic at 15 and then not after I had my kids but after I had my second son every time I tried to diet I fell headlong back into it. If I ate a cookie then I was bad and fat and got into such a panic that I had to purge. It progressed to choosing to eat a BAG of cookies knowing I could purge and it would be "okay". I stopped trying to diet at all because I figured being overweight was better than binge/purge 5 or more times a day.

    Like admitting my weight to people I also admitted that several times over the course of my 3 years of weight loss I sometimes regressed back to bulemia. I can honestly say that I haven't had an episode in at least a year and that is saying something since I have had these 20 extra pounds on for a year. I think I have finally convinced myself that purging is NOT a successful weight loss method but when I get stressed and I am not losing or I lose it and eat too much I have to make sure I don't go there.

    I just want you to realize that no matter what you weigh or what you put in your mouth you have to like yourself before you can like anyone else or be successful at losing weight. Negative self-talk for me is a 50/50 deal. Half the time it would lead me to workout harder, control my food better but the other half it will lead me to binge/purge so I just dont EVER do it anymore.

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